Equilibrium
by Tezslar
Summary: Much to their dismay, Gilbert Beilschmidt, a troubled Elven prince, and a fire mage named Ivan Braginski are reunited and forced to work together. However, traveling for days and fighting side-by-side is bound to create some sort of tension. (Re-uploaded. Magic/Fantasy AU. Ivan/Gilbert, multiple characters. Character death(s). Full summary inside.)
1. The Prince

**[Originally posted: 6/27/2013]**

**RE-UPLOADED FROM AO3**

.

**Full summary:** Gilbert Beilschmidt is a Prince of an ancient race of Elves. Between the ghost of his father's constant ridicule and his little brother's ascension to the throne, he struggles with finding a purpose in life. After having enough, he decides to leave his quiet life of royalty behind. He ventures to the surface world, but quickly finds that life outside the palace isn't as hospitable as he had hoped. After a rough week in the wild, he is rescued by an alchemist and taken to the College of Torchlight, where he is reunited with an old rival from years ago – a fire mage named Ivan Braginski. The two have a history of always trying to outdo the other, getting into violent fights, and playing petty -but dangerous- pranks on each other. Sparks fly between them when they're forced to work together on jobs, but overtime, their travels and endeavors bring them closer and a little flame of attraction gets lit. Gilbert struggles to come to terms with his feelings and contemplates a future he cannot change, all while a greater danger comes back into the world with the intention of destroying and enslaving it.

**Genre(s):** Magic/Fantasy AU, romance, friendship, love, fighting, adventure.  
**Story includes:** Violence, gore, blood, and non-descriptive character death.

**Some story info:  
**•Individual chapter warnings will be listed at the beginning of each chapter.  
•Any text between _'Single quotes and in italics like this'_ are a character's thoughts.  
•This story is rated Mature for violence, gore, language, and some sexual content.

.

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Mention of death. Angst. Slight Gore and blood.**

* * *

Just a few dozen feet off of a desolate road is a small opening leading into a seemingly ordinary cave. However, through this cave is a vertical shaft leading miles under the earth surface, this shaft then connects to a small tunnel. The end of this tunnel comes out into an underground city built entirely of blue-ish white stone. The city is far from abandoned but far from thriving, and is home to an ancient race of Elves. The people here were once vital in the surface world's affairs; however, in recent decades they have fallen from importance and were left to live their lives in almost complete solitude beneath the earth. This civilization, their real name forgotten and renamed as "Underworlders" by people on the surface, lives on as if nothing has changed and they have found their own way of life without the help of "surface-walkers", and they survive by using their own unique magic and skills in weapon and potion making, as well as a special way of farming. For years this civilization has been ruled by a wise and strong leader. However, as immortal as these Elves are, they are prone to becoming ill often and passing on. The king had been bedridden, leaving most of his kingdom to his two sons, Gilbert and Ludwig.

This civilization has many stories throughout history of wars and shaping the earth to what it is today; however, one Elf among them is different, not only in appearance, but in his attitude toward his people. This is the story that's important.

Gilbert is the eldest son at 25 years. Most think that he's obnoxious and always up to no good and would do well with some harsh discipline and training; however he's actually fairly shy and keeps to himself often, though sometimes he can be carefree and a bit arrogant. Most wouldn't think it, but he has an exceptional mastery of ice magic, excellent skill with a bow, and he's also quick with a blade. Once he was about 6 years old, he began to notice how the people in town would look at him differently than the rest of his family. Some of them would glare or scoff, or just stare in astonishment, and sometimes priests would start praying to a higher power. He didn't understand why they were suddenly being so mean to him, until his mother explained it. He was born albino, causing him to have a lack of pigment in his skin and hair so he appears much different from the rest of his family. Although living underground, the Elves that inhabit the city have fairly dark skin, so when Gilbert was born the way he was, people were shocked and scared of him.

The two brothers aren't as close as people expect them to be. Gilbert is 7 years older than Ludwig, and when Ludwig was 8, Gilbert left for 4 years to go to school on the surface to get better training in magic. When he came home, the town had isolated him; even his own father wouldn't give him a chance to prove himself. Though he graduated with flying colors, his father said that he wasn't fit to rule because he _couldn't_ rule over people who refused to follow him; they didn't trust him, and so that duty would fall on Ludwig's shoulders when he became of age. Gilbert had failed, and Ludwig was now the one who had to pick up the pieces and be a better king than Gilbert could have ever been.

When his father became ill and passed his crown onto Ludwig rather than Gilbert, it was a shock to most everyone, but there were whispers that Gilbert was not qualified to rule because of his care-free attitude and recklessness, but it was something else: they simply just didn't like him. Gilbert knew it was coming anyway, he knew that his father thought he was a failure, but what he didn't understand was _why_. He hadn't done a single thing wrong, and had always strived to be the best he could. Gilbert blamed his mother's death for changing his father, but Gilbert didn't blame his mother at all, only his father.

.

Digressing to now: a year after their father died of his illness and Ludwig has become just as good a king as his father before him, some could claim that he is even a better king, and Gilbert had become even more isolated and even hated by most townsfolk aside from his brother, and a maid that he had grown close to over the years. He spent mostly every day in his room writing in a journal and dreaming of seeing the sun again.

Today is the day of a yearly festival where tons of people in town gather together in the courtyard of the castle for food, drink, dance, and song to honor the inauguration of the first king of their kind who lived many many years ago. It's a time when the royal family dresses in their finest robes and joins the festivities and celebrates. However this year is the first year without their father, and Gilbert was debating on even going.

Over the last year he had made some people angry by not being "up to code" as a prince, but the royal life just wasn't for him, he hated it honestly. All the fancy robes and styled hair, it was too much for him. He had an itch to just chop his hair off since it was a pain having it done and straightened often. He remembered how free and refreshing he felt when he cut his hair off when he first left for magic schooling, whereas now it was at his mid-back in length again. His mother loved Gilbert's long hair as a child, so out of respect for her memory Gilbert always left his hair long. The worst part of it, though, was that he would constantly be mistaken for a girl because the hairdressers were told to make him look "fancy" and would put little braids in his hair often, something his mother used to do as well. He couldn't tell them to stop because then he'd seem like an ass to servants and honestly they were the nicest people to him.

Ever since Ludwig took over as king, the two brothers had drifted further apart and would rarely speak, so communication was something that Gilbert lacked and his personality had shifted from being arrogant to quiet and reserved, and he always found himself alone and writing or reading old history books. Though secretly, sometimes at night he would sneak out to hunt with his bow in the caves, just so his fighting skills wouldn't get rusty.

.

A soft knocking came at his chamber door, and he wouldn't have heard it if it hadn't been so quiet around the castle. Gilbert glanced over, brushing his long hair from his face as his attention was torn from his journal.

"Come in." he mumbled just loud enough for the person on the other side of the door to hear.

The heavy wooden door opened and a petite woman walked in, pushing a wheeled clothing cart into Gilbert's room, and shutting the door behind her. "Good afternoon, Master Gilbert." She greeted with a bow. "I'm here to get you ready for the festival." She smiled.

Gilbert gave her a tired look. This was the only maid who he actually liked. She was kind and didn't look at him like he was different, though she knew that he is, but she didn't let it bother her, and she seemed to actually really like his differences. She also could sometimes be fun, if she wasn't on "official business."

"I see." Gilbert said and bookmarked his page in his journal and then turned around in his chair. He flashed a sweet smile toward her, not forgetting his manners, "Let's get started, then, shall we?"

He absolutely _hated_ this part. It was bad enough dealing with the other maids, but having to pretend to enjoy dressing up and being treated like royalty, even though he _is_, is just a pain in the ass. He'd rather be outside practicing magic or hunting in the caves, or even free-running on top of the castle (which his father banned him from doing years ago but he still did it anyway when he was too busy to notice that he had gone missing).

The woman pushed her cart closer to the albino, and began looking through the fancy robes. "Which color would you prefer wearing today, Master?"

"I'm the doll, you decide." He said, "And stop calling me that."

The girl chuckled weakly. "Well, how about red then, Prince Gilbert?" she asked.

"Because of my eyes? He asked, "And no, don't call me Prince either."

"Ah, no, I just... I think red looks nice against your complexion." She mumbled a bit, fearing that she may have offended him.

Gilbert stood up from his chair, towering about half a foot taller than the girl. "I'm just messing with you, red will be fine." He smiled, "Seriously though, just call me Gilbert." He said.

The girl blushed softly and she shook her head, "No, I can't do that, I'll be kicked out of the castle and lose my job."

"And if you defy a direct order given by me you could be exiled or killed, so I suggest you just call me by my name like I asked." He said, raising an eyebrow at the girl.

She sighed and nodded, "Yes, Gilbert." She mumbled out awkwardly, this having been the first time she's addressed him by his first name.

"There we go! That wasn't so hard was it?" he asked happily and smiled down at her. She looked a bit confused by his comments, for it was strange for a prince to act in such a way, but truthfully, she shouldn't be surprised by this behavior from Gilbert. "Now, let's get started before we're late and Ludwig gets his panties in a bunch." He said and began looking through the rack of robes.

"Master! You can't say things like that about the-"

Gilbert turned around and shoved his hand over the girl's mouth. "He's _my_ brother, and the younger one at that. I can say whatever I want about him. And what did I say about that whole 'master' thing?"

The girl's eyes narrowed in defeat and she simply nodded, and Gilbert let his hand fall off of her mouth. "Now, are we going to get started because if we are late Ludwig really _will_ get mad." He said, smiling nervously.

The girl nodded, and unhooked a long red robe from the rack that she brought in. The robe was made of silk and had silver accents on the sleeves. Gilbert actually liked how it looked, which was rare for him since he normally hated everything fancy. As the girl was picking other things out like his shoes, Gilbert was standing aside and undressing himself. None of the maids have ever seen him fully naked but they've seen enough, but it was hilarious to see this girl's face flush red each time she helped him dress. It made having someone dress him actually _fun_.

The girl nearly choked on air when she turned around and saw Gilbert more than half naked. His skin was flawless, not a single blemish. Well, aside from the skinny scar stretching over the curve of his left shoulder: a reminder of his time on the surface. Other than that scar, he looked like a toned marble statue with bright pinkish eyes that were just pleading for something more out of life.

After a moment, the maid helped Gilbert dress and helped the robe over his head. As the red fabric fell over his body, she smiled happily at how handsome he looked. "You look great." She said.

"I don't feel great." He grumbled as he pulled on the front of the robe, "And this fabric is irritating my nipples." He groaned and leaned back onto his desk.

The girl laughed. An actual happy, genuine laugh. "I am sorry. Maybe you should wear a tunic under it?" she suggested.

To which Gilbert shook his head. "We don't have much time left, and you still have to do my hair, and we both know how long that takes."

The maid smiled and nodded. She touched Gilbert's arm and gestured for him to sit in his chair. The albino shifted his body and sat back down with his back to the girl, and as soon as he did, she ran her fingers through his long, snow-colored hair gently.

"I love your hair, it's so pretty." She complimented and began brushing his hair slowly, as if admiring it like a piece of art.

"Thanks, but I hate it." He said.

A small laugh came from beside his ear. "I'm aware. I remember when you came home and all of it was cut off. You looked even more handsome, and your father and brother were in complete shock; but back then, you were happier than I had ever seen you before." She said, and pulled Gilbert's hair up into a ponytail with a bright red silk ribbon. She moved to the front and began braiding down the locks of hair in front of Gilbert's pointed ears.

"I only grow it out because of my mother. She would play with and braid my hair all the time when I was little, so..." he mumbled, glancing away from the girl in front of him. Suddenly he began thinking, one of the reasons why he preferred this maid over the rest was because she reminded him of his mother, with her gentle way of speaking and carefree attitude.

"Yes, she loved your long hair. Rightfully so, if I may say; but if you do not like it, you shouldn't force yourself to keep it." She said, "She wouldn't have wanted you to be unhappy." She mumbled and continued braiding Gilbert's hair.

The albino smiled at her words, but he knew that he had already done enough to wrong the people of the city, so he would try to be who they expected him to be, even if every ounce of his being told him otherwise.

.

As Gilbert sat there having his hair styled, his mind wandered everywhere. To his mother, to the surface, to his years of magic training. Four years at a school where aspiring mages and alchemists come to learn the basics of magic and how not to blow themselves up. Gilbert could still remember the day that he decided to leave; his father slapped him across his left cheek, which left a nice red spot for three days, and told him that he wasn't allowed to dwell on the surface, but after a week, his father, sick of Gilbert's persistence, gave in. He remembered walking up to the entrance of their city and placing his palm on that magic podium that controls the shaft, being lifted into the air and shooting up that dark shaft until he reached the cave above. The first time he had seen the sun was a breathtaking moment, a moment that hurt his eyes but still, it was beautiful. He remembered how at that moment he decided that he would be a different man, even though he was only 15, although mature at the time. At that moment he brought his dagger up to his long white hair and cut it _extremely_ short, and then he set off to the nearest city to study magic like he had always wanted.

.

Just as he was beginning to remember his school days, a loud knock sounded at the door and knocked him out of his daydream. He glanced over again and called for whomever to come in.

Ludwig, the current King and Gilbert's younger brother walked through the door.

"Oh hey Ludwig, what's up?" Gilbert greeted and the maid suddenly froze in her tracks and turned to her King and bowed respectfully.

"Are you almost ready?" Ludwig asked and gave a slight bow to the maid along with a small smile.

Gilbert sighed a bit, "Almost, I think."

The maid smiled a little, "I just need to finish this braid and he'll be ready." She said, and after a quick minute, she stood back from the albino prince and clapped her hands together softly. "There, you're ready."

Gilbert stood up and turned, the skirt of his robe panning out a little around his body. "Thank you very much." He said with a slight bow to the girl, who smiled a bit at the uncommon gesture. She bowed once more before cleaning up and exiting the room with the clothing cart.

After a moment, Ludwig closed the door behind him and walked over to his brother. "Since when did you get so respectful toward the maids?" he asked his brother.

"Since that one learned to laugh with me and treat me like a person." Gilbert said and sat back down. He opened his journal to the page he previously bookmarked and began writing once more.

Ludwig sighed to himself as he watched his brother. "Gilbert we're going to be late if you don't hurry up..." he said quietly. He simply didn't have time for Gilbert to waste. People would be concerned or even disappointed if the King himself was late.

The albino groaned irritatingly and closed his book with carelessness. "Isn't it more dramatic if the stars of the show arrive late?" he said. His voice was humorous but held an angry venom in it as well.

Ludwig sighed and placed his hand on Gilbert's shoulder, which caused the albino to twitch slightly. "I know you're not looking forward to this, but please, I need you out there with me." He said.

Gilbert glanced over at his younger brother, his eyes shone with how much sadness he felt. "No you don't." he said and then moved his shoulder so that he was no longer being touched. "You don't need me for anything."

The blond sighed in exhaustion, giving up on trying to convince his brother. "At least come and see everyone, I'm sure there are tons of people who still want to see you." He said and then made his way back to the door. "Besides, I like having someone I trust right by my side."

After a soft sound of the door latching, Gilbert stared at the wooden entrance for 5 seconds, give or take, before he slumped down in his chair and laid his head down on his desk. He wasn't looking forward to this at all; he already knew that he was a failure and a disappointment, but now his own people could tell him that themselves.

.

The courtyard is a massive area, more like an arena with tall walls circling the palace. Sometimes Gilbert would climb the walls overlooking the city and sit for hours writing in his journal about various things, mostly of the surface world though. The world up there was so much more diverse than down here, more magic existed and it _wasn't safe._ During those four short years on the surface, he discovered so many different types of people and creatures. Down here there are just Elves; they all look the same for the most part, aside from a few different shades of skin color. Up there, there are tons of different people of all colors and sizes and shapes, Elves and dwarves, humans. Gilbert even went to school with a werewolf but down here, he was the only different one. Remembering things like this pained him, but he loved these memories, so he wrote a lot of them down so that he could re-read them and re-live them.

Lights and decoration were sprawled across every inch of the courtyard, and Gilbert admitted that it looked amazing. If anything, his underground civilization was beautiful, but that was about it.

He was sitting alone near the front door of the palace, which was an unnecessarily tall and heavy door, on a beautifully crafted bench made from fabric nearly the same shade of red as his robe. He heard a door open nearby and he popped his head up curiously to see. His brother Ludwig came walking down a nearby hall, his blue and gold accented robes looked expensive and like they were made by mice, and of course the gold crown with 3 blood red gems embedded in the front of it sitting atop his head. Only the best for the King, right?

Gilbert stood up immediately and met his brother in mid-walk. Ludwig smiled at his older sibling and suddenly moved passed him to sit on the bench that Gilbert was just on. The albino was a bit shocked by his brother's actions but he sat down next to him.

"What's wrong, Luddy? For a King on his special day you sure look depressed." Gilbert said, noticing the glum look on the king's face.

The blond chuckled a little, "I suppose... I'm more nervous than depressed." He said.

"How come?"

"This is my first time addressing the city like this." Ludwig said with a sigh, "I don't want to disappoint them."

"Believe me, between you and me up there, I'll be the disappointment." Gilbert said. His voice was that of a joke but he found himself frowning because of how true it actually was. He noticed that his words made his brother fall into a tense silence, and he scrambled to fix it. "H-Hey now, listen:" He said and stood up, standing in front of the King and placing his hands on his shoulders. "You're gonna do fine. You always overachieve at these things, you've even beat me at swordplay, and you _know_ that's pretty awesome." He said. "You'll be great. Everyone will cheer your name and love you." He said in an attempt to cheer his brother up, but deep down his words made another crack appear in his heart.

Ludwig brought his bright blue eyes up to his brother's pinkish ones. This was something that Gilbert did often; praise him and try to boost his confidence that he could be a strong leader, but Gilbert never actually looked happy or genuine about it and Ludwig knew that it was because Gilbert is the rightful heir to the throne. Well... that's not _entirely_ true. Gilbert wasn't upset about not being King; he never really wanted to be in the first place. He felt like a failure and he wanted Ludwig to be the best he could be so maybe Gilbert could take pride in coaching Ludwig to greatness and not feel so bad about his own failure, but instead, it felt like he was just fading into the background, and that's why he really didn't want to attend this festival.

"Thank you, Gilbert." Ludwig said and stood up. "We should go now, we're already late."

"Like I said, it'll be more dramatic."

.

The large doors marking the entrance to the palace opened with a long and agonizing creek, and as they did a crowd of hundreds began to cheer. Ludwig walked out of the palace first; Gilbert trailed close behind on his right. The albino put on a convincing fake smile that he had been practicing for years and flashed it at the crowd. Gilbert had a smile to die for, no one could deny that, but they'd never admit it either. Many people would say that Gilbert has a "devilish charm" to him; the term never made him feel flattered, and made him feel worse about himself. He didn't want to be known as a demon or some seemingly naughty imp.

First, the King and Prince rode on a sort of float, powered by magic that hovers above the ground. They rode it through most of the town's nicer districts and then around the palace grounds. Gilbert spent most of the ride casually waving and smiling at the crowd, and once in a while he would glance over at his brother. He felt better being up there with Ludwig, and the blond seemed genuinely happy. Then there was a speech in the town square that Ludwig nailed and had the entire crowd hollering with pride, and after that, they had a feast with some of the nobles of the city; descendants from famous Elven families who fought in wars on the surface.

Then finally, there was a formal Ball. This time, Gilbert was completely alone. Ludwig had duties to dance with every potential bride that there was in the city, though he was sweet on a tall brunette Elf. Gilbert groaned as he saw his brother and the woman twirling around the large ballroom. Up-beat cultural music was being played by a live band, and people were either standing around and drinking in groups or dancing with their lovers.

Gilbert sighed heavily and leaned his cheek into his palm and tried not to feel completely alone, after all, he enjoyed his solitude... right?

Suddenly someone approached him but he didn't notice, "Excuse me, Gilbert?" it was a woman, but the odd usage of his name caught his attention. He turned and saw that it was the maid who helped him earlier. She had her long brown hair curled nicely into giant curls that fell down over her chest, and her dress was long and a pale blue. She actually looked extremely beautiful, and for once Gilbert was in awe.

"What are you doing here?" he asked her.

"My family was invited. We're actually nobility, I'll have you know; fought in a war against a bunch of nasty demons from the Outer Realm a few hundred years ago." She explained. "How are you doing this evening?" she asked as she took a seat next to the albino, "You look kind of down."

Gilbert flashed that fake smile again and chuckled, "Nah I'm fine, I'm just happy to see Ludwig having so much fun." He said as he looked over to his brother who had just twirled the woman he was dancing with.

The maid looked down at her gloved hands, "You're lying..." she mumbled.

"What?" Gilbert turned his attention to her.

"You're not happy. Well, you're happy for your brother, but you're not happy for you." She said, "I've been taking care of you for years Gilbert, I know when you're okay and when you're not, and lately you haven't been."

Gilbert was silent for a moment, "I'm still getting over my father's death... we're immortal, so I thought that we could live forever..."

The woman's eyes narrowed in sadness, "As we age, our immune systems become weaker than those of others, and it's easy for older Elves to become fatally ill. Your father was old, and it was almost expected for him to get sick... I'm sorry for your loss, I truly am." she mumbled on as Gilbert stared at her. He got the feeling that maybe there was more to this maid than met the eye.

"Anyway." She said quickly and stood up, her brown curls bouncing with life. "I wasn't going to ask because it isn't my place as your maid, but, would you like to dance?" she said.

Gilbert's eyes widened and he blinked a few times, but for the first time in a long time, he smiled a genuine smile. "Sure, I'd like that." He said and stood up. He didn't hesitate to gently grab her gloved hand and led her onto the dance floor.

He placed a hand on her hip as he took her other hand into his, and the two began twirling and moving expertly to the tempo of the music.

The maid smiled happily at Gilbert, "I didn't know you could dance." She said.

Gilbert laughed at that, "Ludwig made me take dance classes."

"I see, I see~ Well you're very good." She said and chuckled softly.

The two continued on, making small talk and dancing around the room. Soon though, they began to attract the attention of several attendees. A Prince and a maid dancing together was unheard of. Though they didn't pay any attention to them, and simply enjoyed the company of each other. Gilbert felt like it was just the two of them, and he rather enjoyed that feeling. Everyone else and their judging eyes were irrelevant.

Soon, the music stop, and Ludwig went to fetch his brother. The albino was sitting with his maid friend and laughing with her, genuinely having a good time, but alas it had to come to an end, as Ludwig said that he needed to prepare for the evening tour with him.

Gilbert apologized to his lady friend and gave her a sweet kiss on her cheek before walking off with his brother.

The evening looked different than the morning tour, all the lights had been set to an orangey-red color to replicate the glow of the setting sun. Gilbert liked it this way; it was nice and had a calm and warm feeling to it.

He sat with his brother on the float again and rode around the city. They reached a middle-class district, where Gilbert had noticed a decline in excitement from the crowd. He glanced around and in the distance he saw a group of people holding up signs, and he squinted just enough to be able to read a few:

_"Prince" Gilbert is unfit_

_The "Prince" is a demon_

_Death to the freak_

He felt his heart sink when he read the words. Like someone had literally taken a knife to it. He looked away and then heard the people began to chant something about him. He didn't want to hear it. What had he even done that made them so mad? He was just different and yet he was hated by so many. He gripped his hands tightly onto the red fabric covering his thighs in an attempt to keep himself calm and block out the voices. The chanting only got louder, as if everything else was fading and that was the only thing he could hear. He suddenly stood up from his seat, which quickly caught his brother's attention, and he walked to the back of the float. He heard his name called by his brother in a frantic questioning town, but it didn't stop him from jumping off the back of the float.

He began to run as fast as he could in the long red robe he was wearing; the fabric was fluttering in the air behind him as he ran. He felt tears stinging at his eyes but he mentally yelled to himself that he refused to cry. He could hear some townsfolk yelling out "Prince Gilbert!?" as he ran by, but not once did he stop.

.

He ran and ran until he finally reached the courtyard, where the ground was littered with the aftermath of a party. He took a moment to catch his breath, and then he walked along a paved path that was surrounded by exotic flowers on each side, and soon he came to a small pond behind the palace. The area had been overrun with weeds and had clearly been ignored for years. This garden used to be his mother's favorite spot, and she'd often take him here to read him stories before carrying him up to bed. He sat down on the bench were he could remember a shorter version of himself sitting excitedly on his mother's lap, begging for her to read him another story of the surface world. Even as a child he was always interested in what lied above the white stones of this prison that he was forced to call 'home'.

He gazed into the water of the pond at his reflection, his eyes narrowed into sharp glares. He hated the eyes looking back at him, he hated his white skin and his white hair. He hated himself. He blinked once when he suddenly saw the water ripple around his face, and when he realized that the rippling was from his tears falling into the water from his eyes, he suddenly began crying more. He curled his legs up to his chest as it felt like someone had reached into his torso and was squeezing his heart tightly, and he buried his face into his knees. This was the very spot that he sat for hours after his mother's funeral, and this was the first time since then that he had even been back here.

His mother was the only one who loved him truly. She loved his hair, said it reminded her of freshly fallen snow, and that his eyes reminded her of the sky during sunset, a mix of blue and red. She loved him and didn't care that he was different; she didn't think he was a freak or a demon, and she would often argue with those who said that he was. When she past, his protective barrier was gone, he had no one to protect him, so he built up a wall himself and started locking himself in his room, writing. He convinced himself that he'd rather be alone, and that as long as he loved himself, he would be fine.

The only problem there was that he absolutely despised himself.

His daydreaming was cut short when a gentle hand gripped onto his shoulder. He looked over his shoulder and the maid he had danced with earlier was smiling down at him, but the smile was etched with worry.

"I'm fine." Gilbert muttered out and turned his head back to the pond.

The maid let out an amused yet sad chuckle before taking a seat close to the albino. "Your eyes are all red and you're still crying. You don't really expect me to believe that you're fine, do you?"

Gilbert didn't give a response and simply kept his gaze on the water. The maid suddenly cupped Gilbert's face and turned him toward her. Smiling softly, she began rubbing at the albino's wet cheeks. The action made Gilbert choke up and his eyes glaze over in salty tears again. This woman was exactly like his mother.

"Gilbert, I want to tell you something." She said and gently laid her hand over one of his pale ones. "Your mother and I, we were great friends growing up. We were actually a bit like you and your brother. When she found out that she was going to have you, she was so ecstatic; she was finally going to have a baby. When you arrived, I was right there by her side, and as you were sleeping peacefully in her arms, she said to me, 'If anything should happen to me, please take care of this boy.' And I have tried my best to keep my promise, but I fear that I have failed."

Gilbert watched her as she spoke, and then shook his head weakly.

"Gilbert..." she started again, "You're so much like your mother, and just like her, you have no place in a palace or ruling a city. You belong up there on the surface, learning magic. That's what you've always wanted to do, right?"

The albino nodded a bit, "Yeah, but... Ludwig will be all alone then..."

"I'll take care of him, don't worry." She said, "Listen, there's a College up there, called the College of Torchlight, I hear that they accept nearly everyone as long as they show potential." She said and then smiled "Just something to think about."

Gilbert looked away for a moment and then down to his hands. "You really think they'll accept me?" he asked.

"Of course. Between your skills in magic and alchemy, they'll accept you in a heartbeat." She chuckled. "I'm just saying, you'd be much happier up there, maybe you could just forget about being a Prince and live a happy normal life, maybe find someone to spend it with." She suggested by nudging her elbow into his arm playfully.

Gilbert chuckled to hide his embarrassed blush, "You really think I should?"

"I really do."

"Then... I'll do it."

.

Gilbert stripped himself of his festive clothing, and quickly took a bath. Messily undoing the braids in his hair and cleaning it. After bathing, he pulled only his undergarments on and opened the doors to his standing wardrobe and pulled out a pale dark green tunic that laced up the front until it reached just under his collar bones, the sleeves had been torn off and revealed his arms; the matching trousers were a similar dark green and plain, a string through the fabric so he could tighten them and keep them from falling off. He threw the clothing over his shoulder as he continued to fish through the closet. Soon he pulled out a few light brown leather straps with sheaths for holding weapons and a decent sized shoulder bag. He walked away, not bothering to close the closet doors and went to a large chest at the foot of his bed, throwing his clothes messily onto the covers. He opened the chest and smiled down at the contents before reaching down and pulling out a small silver short blade with a hilt made of stone nearly the same color as his skin. He set the weapon on the soft cushion of his bed before reaching down again. His hand gripped tight around another weapon, one that made him feel complete, like it was a part of his body. The white fabric of the grip was cold in his hand but comfortable. He lifted the weapon from the chest and brought it close, and let his free hand graze the underside of the professionally carved stone. It was a bow, a special one. It was made from a special type of stone that bends but will not break, and will always return to its natural shape; the same stone the hilt of his blade was made from. The bow had shiny streaks of blue gems running along it, winding through it like small rivers cutting through the planet's crust. It was his favorite possession, and he had always felt natural holding it.

He heard his chamber door open behind him, and he didn't bother to look; he already knew who it was. He waited for the door to close again before speaking.

"I guess you're wondering why I took off like that, huh?" he asked.

"Not really. I can assume since you're packing now, that you're leaving." It was Ludwig, who didn't seem fazed that his brother was nearly naked.

Gilbert turned to look at the blond. "Ludwig, I know what you're going to say, that you need me here, but the truth is," he cracked a sad smile, "you really don't. You never have. You stopped being my little brother years ago, and now it's time for me to find my own life and stop living in your shadow."

Ludwig didn't say anything, and Gilbert grabbed his trousers from his bed, pulling them over his legs quickly and then tying a knot in the front. They were tight, but let him move easily, which was important to him. He slipped the matching tunic on as well and laced up the front until the shirt hugged his torso tightly.

"Then go." Ludwig finally spoke, brandishing a true smile. "If you'll be happier up there, then go, but promise that you'll come visit when you can."

Gilbert smiled weakly and nodded. "Yeah, of course I will." Part of him felt like he was lying; He had no intention of coming back here unless he absolutely had to. He didn't like the gloom of this place.

"I'll meet you in the foyer when you're ready to leave." Ludwig said and left his brother to finish packing. He knew better than to try to convince his brother of staying. Gilbert never wanted this life anyway, but then again, neither did Ludwig, but he knew that someone had to stay.

.

Gilbert pulled on some brown leather knee-hi boots and laced them up tightly, twisting his ankles and jumping a few times to see how they felt. He always felt more comfortable in clothing like this rather than fancy well sown robes and tiny sandals. He then picked up the straps from earlier and wrapped one around his waist, and after snapping it together securely, he picked up his dagger and slid it into the sheath on his right hip. He took the other strap and swung it around his shoulder, attaching it to the one around his waist. He lifted his bow and admired it for a moment before carefully snapping the leather piece around the handle, attaching it securely onto his back.

He glanced at himself in a nearby mirror. "Now this I like." He said smugly and turned his body to admire himself more. He felt like he was actually in his skin now, armed and dressed in lesser clothing. He thought he looked better this way. However, there was something else bothering him: His hair. He didn't want to cut it for sentimental reasons, but it would get in his way eventually. He glanced around to try to find a solution and then he remembered the red ribbon that the maid had put in his hair earlier. He found it lying on his desk next to one of his journals and he carefully lifted it, he let the ribbon slide through his fingers for a moment before he went over to the mirror. He fumbled with his long hair for a moment before lifting the majority of it into a messy ponytail off the back of his head, tying the ribbon in a tight knot around the bunch of white hair, pale strands sticking off to the sides. More strands fell down in front of his pointy ears, which he annoyingly pushed aside. After a while of fussing with his hair, he blew air out of his mouth, causing the strands to move a little.

He looked down at his desk and picked up his journal and skimmed through the pages. He debated on bringing the small black book, thinking that maybe it would just be a bunch of dreams of the surface. Why would he need it when he's actually up there? Still though, he closed the journal, snapping the little button on the front shut, and gathered his shoulder bag from his bed. He slid the small journal into the bag and then grabbed a few pens from his desk, shoving them carelessly into the bag as well.

Finally he stood by his door, gazing into the room that he had slept in since he was a child, and wondering if he would ever be in here again. He blew out a candle near the door and then closed the heavy wooden entrance behind him, and began walking down the hall to the foyer.

.

As he said he would, Ludwig was waiting near the palace entrance. He was glancing down at the blue-ish tiles at his feet, trying to comprehend what exactly was happening. His brother was leaving for a second time, but this time... he wasn't sure if he'd come back.

Gilbert stood at the top of the giant flight of stairs across from the palace entrance. He felt a growing pang of guilt rising in his gut as he watched his brother stand there with that mournful look on his face. For a brief moment he thought maybe he should stay, but his eyes glanced around the empty and bland foyer of the place he could never honestly call home. A sense of loneliness and dread crept into him, and he swallowed roughly before quickly stepping down the stairs.

Ludwig heard the tapping of Gilbert's leather boots against the stone tiles and he turned his head to look at him. His older brother looked ready to tackle the outside world, and in all honesty, he was a bit jealous of Gilbert for being brave enough to leave. As the albino neared him, Ludwig bowed his head in respect for him.

"Oh stop that." Gilbert said sarcastically, trying to make this as easy as possible. He smiled confidently at his brother, who only gave him a weak smile in return.

The blond brought his hands up to a small silver chain around his neck and lifted it over his head, the pendant attached to it slipping out from behind his robe. He held the necklace in front of him so the pendant was hanging in Gilbert's view. It was a silver cross with black outlining it, with a sapphire gem in the center. Ludwig took a step closer to Gilbert and began to put the chain over the albino's head.

Gilbert twitched back a little and shook his head before Ludwig could put the necklace on him, "No, I can't take that, it's yours." He said. The necklace had been in their family for hundreds of years. It's a pendant that has been passed to each new king and is meant to be worn until death or until a new king is crowned.

"You were supposed to be king, I know that, so you deserve this much at least." He said and put the chain over Gilbert's head. The albino didn't protest this time, and he simply looked down at the cross hanging between his pectorals. He lifted it and gazed at it, and he was able to see a faint reflection of himself in the blue gem.

"If not that, then take it as a reminder of me."

The sentence caught Gilbert's attention and he looked up at his brother, who was now smiling happily, almost proudly, at him. The albino felt his throat tighten with the need to cry and he suddenly leaped forward and took his brother into an unexpected and tight embrace.

Ludwig smiled sadly and wrapped his arms around his brother as well. Affection wasn't something commonly shown in their family, so it came as a bit of a surprise when the albino suddenly hugged him.

Soon the blond pulled back and placed his hands on Gilbert's bare shoulders, "Did you pack some food?" he asked, wanting to make sure that his brother would be okay for at least a few days.

The albino nodded and patted his shoulder bag, which looked bloated and full with what Ludwig could only assume was food and some other things that Gilbert wanted to take. Ludwig smiled at his brother and moved his hands off of him, and took a step back.

"Make sure to come visit once in a while. I want to hear all about your adventures." He said.

"You bet!" Gilbert said proudly, "I'll have tons of awesome and heroic stories to tell!" he laughed a little, and so did Ludwig.

It was a nice moment. The two hadn't laughed truly for so long.

.

Gilbert stood outside the palace door for a few minutes. He looked down at his feet, then up to the large stone walls circling the palace, and then he turned around to look at the door that he just stepped out of, the same door that he was sure that his brother was standing on the other side of, staring mournfully. He swallowed a sudden fear and shook it off, and took on a quick walking pace toward the courtyard exit.

He reached the town and kept on walking, not stopping when he began to hear some Elves whispering and watching him as he walked past. No one said a single thing to him, but they noticed his strange attire and knew that something was up.

_'The Prince is leaving again.'_

Somehow the fact sent some dread through some of the villagers.

Gilbert didn't think twice. He shook his head a little and made up his mind, he was dead-set on doing this. He pushed open the gate to the city and took his first step outside of city grounds in a long time. Some guards standing nearby began to question him and run after him, but he simply turned to them and held up his hand, gesturing them to stop. Without a word, he turned and began walking toward the tunnel that led up to the surface.

After reaching the tunnel, the light from the city had faded and it was getting hard to see the path ahead. Gilbert held up his left hand and a soft light began to glow in his palm, glowing brighter and brighter until it lit up more than a few feet in front of him. He continued walking with the light guiding him through the small tunnel and eventually he came out into a fairly large opening. The room was completely empty aside from the skinny podium in the center of the room with a blue stone on the top. He walked up to it and looked at it. This was the way to the surface, all he had to do was put his hand on it and the platform under it would lift into the cave on the surface. He took in a deep breath and let it out slowly before he placed his free hand on the blue stone. He let some of his magic seep from his hand into the stone, and it suddenly flashed a bright blue light throughout the entire room that made his eyes squint shut instantly in defense. Below him he heard some creaking but he kept his hand on the podium and braced himself for what he knew was coming next. Suddenly the platform beneath him sprang upward, dust and dirt flying out from under it. The sudden jerky movement caused his knees to buckle and he nearly fell. The glowing light from his other hand went out as he grasped it around the podium to keep himself from falling. Once he lifted himself up again, he looked up toward the surface. He could hear the hollow vertical shaft howling as the platform raced him to the surface, the wind blowing his hair back and waving erratically behind him. Suddenly an ecstatic smile instinctively pulled his lips up into an almost psychotic looking smile, and he poured more of his magic into the blue stone, causing it to shine brighter and move faster. He couldn't help the small excited darkened giggle that escaped his lips as the platform picked up speed. There was just something so _exhilarating_ about bolting up toward the surface, knowing that at the top waited an unknown world that he was dying to explore.

After a short minute or two of feeling the air blow passed him, the platform began to slow down. He heard the wind from the outside world howling through the cave above him as he neared the surface, and soon the lift halted to a jerky stop and he took his hand off the blue gem, which dimmed back down to its original dark blue color. He glanced around, and saw the entrance to the cave lit with an orangey red color. The albino walked toward the entrance, feeling a rising sense of anticipation in his chest, his eyes widening and practically sparkling with excitement. He took a single step out of the cave, and instantly his eyes squinted until they were just a centimeter open. The sun was bright and setting in the distance, and he felt a bit dizzy after not seeing it for 8 years. He let his eyes close and he leaned his head back a little, enjoying the warmth on his skin; there was nothing quite like it.

He felt a cool breeze blow and it carried the summer scented air into his nostrils. He took in a deep breath and then exhaled, and he finally opened his eyes. He rubbed at his sockets and blinked a few times until his vision went back to normal, and then took a few steps out away from the cave until he was standing in the center of the broken stone road nearby. He glanced around and saw trees, grass, and flowers all waving in the wind, the sound of the leaves rubbing together filled him with a nostalgic feeling of the first time he stepped out of that cave. He saw a family of deer grazing in a nearby field, and he smiled a tiny smile, but it was the happiest smile he's had in a long time.

He was finally free.

.

.

**~3 Months Earlier~**

.

It was dark and storming, lightning slicing the sky into pieces with bright purple-edge white jagged lines. The rain was pouring down hard and created large muddy puddles everywhere. The town's lights were blown out, and the dirt streets were darkened and hazed over with white from the harsh rainfall. Everyone was inside by a fire warming up, or at the tavern drinking this gloomy night away.

Except for one man.

He just reached the town, dragging a large oblong shaped object behind him. The object left an indent in the dirt path as the man dragged it. With each step he took, mud slung up onto his boots and pants, but it somehow went well with the blood splattered across his leather chest plate. As he walked, the wind would blow the tails of a long piece of fabric wrapped around his neck in different directions. The random bolts of lightning would light his path as he continued walking, dragging the object with ease. The object was leaking some dark liquid out from the other end, the same liquid that was dripping down the man's armor and his left cheek.

Soon he reached the town hall, where the leader of this quiet little town was probably sipping on some fine wine with his wife and children nearby. He knocked on the door and from inside, a guard opened and gasped in surprise. The dirtied man simply gave a crooked smile and the guard realized who the tall man was. The guard let him in but he couldn't help but stare at the large object that the man had suddenly heaved up onto his shoulder like it was a small bag of flower.

It was a cleanly severed head that was still dripping blood, with eyes that one could still see the warm life slowly draining from.

The guard called for the "mayor", and after a moment, he, dressed in his long nightwear, came into the main hall, gasping much like the guard did at the sight of the other man with the large bloody head on his shoulder. It was a familiar sight but it still surprised him every time. He then lifted his hand to his forehead and used his other to close the door to the room that his family was in. The mayor gave a weak smile toward the tall bloodied man, and motioned with his hand to follow him.

The nobleman led him down to a small dungeon under the hall. "Place it on the table." He instructed, to which the other did. He lugged the head over his shoulder with a small grunt and let the head slam onto the table. He stood back and then watched the noble open a chest behind a locked cage door. He lifted out two bags of money and then turned to the other. He tossed one at the man, who caught the bag expertly.

"I didn't think anyone could kill that lesser demon, but you-" he stopped to throw the other bag, which the man also caught. "you certainly proved what a powerful mercenary you are."

The other man tilted his head to the side humbly, not particularly liking being complimented for killing things, but he smiled nonetheless and slid the two bags of money into his bag.

"Good job, Braginski." He said, "I look forward to seeing the next poor creature whose head you slice off." The noble added a small cackle to the end of his sentence, and then wished the other luck, and simply went on his way.

The man was left there alone, but soon went back into the storm outside.

Back out in the pouring rain, he ruffled his ashy-blond hair, it was caked with dirt and blood and he suddenly found himself craving a nice hot bath. He took a moment to readjust the long scarf around his neck as he looked up at the sky, noticing some stars flickering in the night behind darkened clouds. A flash of lightning lit his face, causing his bright violet eyes to shine brilliantly. He smiled as he walked, and finally wiped the demon blood from his cheek with his thumb.

Tonight had been a good night.

* * *

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	2. The Mercenary Mage

**[Originally posted: 7/17/2013]**

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Mention of death. Slight violence(fighting). Slight blood.**

* * *

Without fail, as soon as he walked into the house, his older sister let out a shriek at the sight of her kid brother covered in dirt and blood. He raised an eyebrow as he let the door close behind him while the woman ran to him and began frantically wiping at his face with a white cloth she had in her hand. This wasn't unusual for him, nor was his sister panicking unusual either.

"Ivan are you all right!?" She asked with a bit of terror in her voice as she continued cleaning the drying blood from his cheek, ruffling his hair with her other hand to free it of excess mud and blood. Ivan had been gone for about a day due to the job he took and she wasn't expecting him to be home so late, so the fact that he just stumbled into the house at night hours was a bit alarming.

"Well, I'm alive." Ivan said with a touch of sarcasm, and his sister glared at him, "Yes, I'm fine. I promise." He said sincerely.

"Good." She said with a sigh, "I'll go put on a warm bath for you, and then I'll make you something to eat." She said.

Ivan nodded and watched her walk away.

That was Katyusha, Ivan's older sister. She's sweet and kind but is often timid and quiet, and tends to overreact. She's a mage along with her brother, but rather than using fire magic like he does, she chooses to use more helpful magic such as healing, wards, and resistance magic.

Ivan went to his room, which was the biggest room in the house. He had a lot of weapons held in racks lining his walls as well as some strewn about pieces of broken armor. He undid the straps holding his leather chest plate on and let it fall to the wooden floor with a thud. He removed his tattered undershirt as well, leaving his chest naked. His skin had a few little nicks and scars, but nothing too noticeable unless someone looked at him closely. Just as he began to unlace his boots, he heard the floor creek. He looked up at his doorway to see a tiny girl with long dirty blond hair in a long dark blue dress.

This is his other sister, a younger one named Natalia. She is also very quiet, but not as openly friendly as Katyusha. She can cast small spells like her siblings but she never showed much interest in magic, but rather took a liking to sharp objects such as swords and daggers. She looks small and sweet, but she could probably kill anyone without them even knowing what hit them, if she wanted. To be honest, it kind of startled Ivan at times.

Ivan smiled at his sister and sat on the edge of his bed. "What is it, Natalia?" he asked.

The girl stood still for a moment and then walked into her brother's room. "Kat said you were back... you look hurt." She said as she walked to him. Her deep blue eyes seemed emotionless but Ivan could read her as well as Katyusha could; Natalia was concerned for her brother.

"Nah I'm all right, this is the demon's blood, not mine." He said with a small smile.

The girl smiled a little and nodded. "I'll go help Kat with dinner." She said and silently turned and walked away. Ivan smiled more after she left; he really did have a good life here. Yet, it felt like something was missing.

The three of them were left without their parents, but Katyusha was always like a mother to Ivan and Natalia. Their parents were killed during a bandit raid years ago when Natalia was really young, but the three banded together and lived off of what their parents left them, but soon Ivan began to fight and take on small jobs here and there to make money, overtime he built a reputation in town as a skilled fighter and an even better mage. However when he started to kill stronger monsters that most were terrified of, people began to become scared of him. Not long after, people wouldn't even look at him. It was painful, since all Ivan truly wanted was to live and provide for his family, he also wanted a friend, or even a lover if he could get passed the friendship stage, but no one would give him that chance.

.

The bath felt nice after a long evening of trying to slice off a demon's head. He was finally able to wash his entire body free of the blood and mud he had splattered on his body. He brought his hands up to his neck and carefully rubbed his fingers against the skin, and the skin twitched a little under his touch. Spanning around most of his neck are a bunch of scars. It looked like someone had taken a razorblade and made incisions in his skin; however these were from a mage that he knew about 8 years ago; the two nearly killed each other back then. Ivan chuckled at how stupid he was back in that time, since he used to be rather outgoing and liked picking fights.

Soon he was dressed again in a ragged long shirt and watching pants, his scarf wrapped around his neck to hide the scars. He was sitting at the dinner table while Natalia set plates on it and Katyusha finished cooking.

"How did the hunt go?" Natalia asked, taking a seat to the right of her brother.

The question caught Ivan off-guard since Natalia never usually asked about his hunts. "Fine, I guess."

"You don't seem happy like usual."

"She's right, you know." A softer voice came from the stove; Katyusha was looking over her shoulder as she stirred whatever she was cooking. "Usually you come home with a smile on your face and drink vodka until dinner's done." She said, "You just seem a bit down compared to usual."

Ivan blinked slowly for a moment before his eyes dropped in a sad realization. He hadn't realized that his depression was that obvious, thinking that only he could see it. He turned his face to the empty white plate below him on the table. "I suppose I'm a little down... I did _good_ tonight; that demon has been killing travelers from all over the country and anyone who went to kill it was killed too, so I'm proud of myself for killing it and I felt good when I did, but as soon as I turned the head into the mayor, he said something that sounded like he viewed me as a monster." He said.

Katyusha came over and gently rubbed the top of Ivan's head with her hand, much like a mother would to her son. "You're not a monster, Ivan. You're a hero. You've saved so many lives by killing off these monsters and demons, so don't you worry about it." She smiled kindly, and Ivan gave a weak one back.

"I know... but I still feel, I don't know. Unfulfilled, I guess?" he shrugged.

Katyusha hummed to herself for a moment. "You're a mage, Ivan. You've always had a love for magic, so why don't you pursue that instead?"

"There's that College out in TorchlightForest, it's about a day's trip from here." Natalia spoke up. Both of her older siblings looked at her curiously and she got the hint. "It's a college for mages and such. They have classes for whatever type of magic you use, and they often do jobs for surrounding towns." She explained.

"That's right! That sounds perfect for you~!" Katyusha said happily, though she looked a bit nervous as well, and patted her brother's shoulder.

Ivan's eyes narrowed in sadness, "But what about you two? I don't want to leave you here alone..."

"Don't worry about us, Ivan." Katyusha said, Natalia nodded in agreement with her. "You deserve to be happy and staying in this small town isn't for you."

"The College has breaks every so often so the students can visit their families if they have them." Natalia said.

Ivan gave concerned glances to his sisters before he sighed heavily in defeat. "Fine, I'll check it out; but if this doesn't work then I'm coming straight home."

Katyusha gave a happy smile and then stood up. "Then it's decided!" she beamed and went back to cooking

"Ivan, could you give me a hand with this stove? It's not working properly again."

Ivan laughed and stood up. He held his hand close to the burner on the stove and his hand suddenly held a small ball of flickering fire in it. His sister chuckled and continued stirring the food. Ivan would help like this often; it was a nice way to keep himself from getting rusty when he wasn't on jobs.

.

After a delicious meal, Ivan went up to bed. Not having slept at all the previous night, he was extremely tired from fighting and dragging a demon's head for miles. He pulled his covers up to his chest and put his arms behind his head and stared up at the wooden ceiling.

'_Should I really go to the College?_' he asked himself. He brought a hand out from behind his head and lit a small fire in his palm. '_I'm good with fire magic and I'm a decent fighter, so I wonder if they'll take me._' The flame grew bigger in his hand and he suddenly sat up. His face was lit with the flickering light from the fire and he watched as it danced in his palm.

'_Maybe..._'

.

The next morning he was greeted by his older sister in the kitchen who was washing dishes from last night's meal. He asked if she needed any help but she simply shook her head. So, he sat down at the table and thought about what plagued his mind last night. Was he really going to leave his sisters behind here all alone and go to the College? He knew that they would probably be all right since Katyusha knew some helpful spells and Natalia was like a little assassin in disguise. Still, the idea of leaving bothered him.

"Ivan?" he heard his name being called but didn't respond until a hand was shaking him by the shoulder gently, "Ivan, hun?" Katyusha was looking down at him with concern on her face. "Are you all right?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He paused for a moment. "I've just been thinking about what you and Natalia said last night. I haven't decided on anything yet but I have been thinking..." he said.

Katyusha smiled down at her brother, "Just do what makes you happy." She said. Ivan simply watched her with a sad look in his eyes. "Would you like to join me for my morning shopping?" she asked. "I could use some help carrying things home."

.

Within a few minutes, Ivan found himself following his older sister around the marketplace like a trained animal. He didn't mind shopping, but his sister was a bit of a pain to shop with. She'd wander around for minutes upon minutes and not find anything even though she knows the basic things that she gets.

Ivan soon drifted into his own thoughts, not really paying attention to anything around him. His life was good, sure, but the same routine of getting up, checking the job board in town hall, going out and killing something, cutting its head off and then dragging it back to town was beginning to wear him down. Townsfolk were beginning to call him a monster because he would rarely come back with injuries from his jobs and he could kill nearly anything so people began to become afraid of him. He's a gentle giant and he'd love nothing more than to prove that to someone other than his sisters, but no one would ever give him that chance.

Somewhere in his daydream, he bumped into someone and he quickly began to apologize to them. The woman he bumped into turned to him and told him in a rather rude way to watch where he was going. Ivan stood there with a sad look on his face as the woman turned away from him and walked away.

Katyusha suddenly put a hand on Ivan's shoulder and he glanced over at her. She smiled a little at him as if saying that she was here for him. "We should get our food and get back home before Natalia wakes up." Katyusha said. Ivan nodded a bit and began to follow her.

Just as she said, Katyusha gathered some meat and fruit for herself and her siblings. However, Ivan was standing aside still looking rather glum. He picked up an apple and looked at its shiny red coating and sighed. As he stared at the apple, he began to think more. He wanted to learn more about magic, hone his skills, meet an entirely new set of people, and going to the College was the only way to do that.

"Ivan." Katyusha said and got his attention. She took the apple from her brother's hands and set it in the small woven basket on her arm. "You're very spacy today and I think I know why. I can't make this decision for you, but you clearly want to go because of how much you're thinking about it." she smiled softly. "You can always come back if it doesn't work out, and if you stay at the College you'll be able to visit during breaks and whatnot."

Ivan watched her for a moment, searching her face for anything, but Katyusha was smiling and she was happy, genuinely happy. She was always someone who was made happy by other people's happiness, and she'd do everything she could to make them happy.

He smiled a little and nodded toward his sister. "All right... I guess I'll give it a try." he said.

Katyusha actually jumped up a bit as she clapped her hands together happily. "Wonderful! We'll have to get you some things for the travel!" she beamed and grabbed her brother's hand, dragging him further into the market.

"You'll need bread to eat. Oh, and maybe some new clothing too." Katyusha said as she looked at a stand with some armor on it.

Ivan smiled at his sister, "I think my current armor is good, though I would like some mage robes." He said.

Katyusha beamed a happy smile and began pulling Ivan again. After some walking and dodging some people, they stood in front of a little stand where there were some well-made robes hanging up. Katyusha nodded her head toward the stand as a way of telling Ivan to pick some stuff out, so he walked closer and began looking.

There were a lot of different robes and even some armor, but he honestly wanted something that clearly stated that he was a mage. He picked up a dark purple robe and looked at it, and thought it was a bit too flashy with its gold accents. He continued looking around, walking all along the stands and trying to find something. He reached the end of the table and sighed, not seeing any others that he liked, but then out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a heap of clothing and he leaned down to it. He picked it up and discovered that it was a long gray robe with what looked like black belts lacing over the front at the bottom. It looked a bit ragged like it wasn't well-kept, but Ivan liked it. It was dark but in a way he really liked that.

Suddenly the man running the stand turned to him and got his attention. "You don't want to buy that." He said, "It's old and worn out. I'm sure I have something else for you though."

Ivan just glanced up at him with a slightly annoyed look on his face. "I want this one." He said simply. The man cringed back a little and nodded slowly.

After paying for the robe, the two decided to leave and go back home, as Natalia would probably be awake soon.

.

Upon entering their small house, Natalia was sitting on the couch across from the door. She was dressed in another of her long dresses and sitting properly, yet her eyes shone with a familiar irritation.

"You left me again." She said simply.

Katyusha laughed nervously and went to her sister, patting the top of her head. "I had to take Ivan shopping. He's decided to go to the College." She said with a happy smile.

Natalia's eyes widened a little and she looked at her brother, who was standing by the door looking a bit nervous, like a spotlight now was on him. A small smile took the girl's lips, which was a bit strange since Natalia rarely smiled, but something about the smile made Ivan smile back.

Suddenly Natalia stood up, "I have a gift for you." She said and quickly walked to her room.

Katyusha smiled and looked to Ivan, "Shall we see what your robe looks like on you?" she asked.

Ivan nodded a little and walked further into the room. He unraveled his scarf from his neck and set it aside for now and fumbled with the grey robe he had bought. He undid the straps in the front and slid his arms into it and tied the straps back together. It fit well, not too big or too small. Suddenly Katyusha was by him and messing with the collar of the robe like a mother to her child. She kept that happy smile on, and so did Ivan.

She gently picked up Ivan's scarf and whipped it around his neck. She wrapped it snuggly so it covered his scars and she pushed the tails behind his shoulders so they fell down over his back. The contrast between the white scarf and the grey robe worked well on Ivan, and she admitted that her little brother looked very handsome.

Ivan began to move about in the robe, seeing how it felt and moving its arms to break the material in, while Natalia walked back into the room carrying a small object in her hand. Once she neared him, Ivan was able to tell what it was: a sheath with a dagger inside. The sheath was made of a white stone with silver accents, and the dagger and hilt made of pure silver. This is Natalia's favorite blade, Ivan knew this.

"Is this for me?" he asked her, and she nodded. "Nat... I don't know if I can take this, it's your favorite, and it could get broken or lost." He explained.

"If it does, then it just means that it's done its job of protecting you." She said with a small smile and held the dagger to her brother.

Ivan sighed a little and took the sheath and held it tightly. "Thank you." He said.

"Think of it as having a piece of me with you, like you have Kat with your scarf."

Ivan smiled and chuckled a little, liking the idea of it. "I will, and I'll keep you both safe, I promise."

.

Ivan separated from his sisters to pack. He actually wasn't planning on leaving for another day or two, but his sisters seemed determined to get him out there as fast as possible, like he was going to back out of going if he waited for too long. He stripped his robes off and changed back into his armor. He put his robe back on and started packing the rest of his clothes in an old bag he had lying about, most of the bag was filled with his books though, as he enjoyed reading when he wasn't off on jobs.

A knock at his door caught his attention and he turned around to see his sister Katyusha standing there. She smiled at him, "Could you come with me? I have something I want to give you as well." She said.

Ivan put down his bag and followed his older sister. She led him to her room and went to her closet. After pushing some stuff out of the way, she pulled a long wooden box from the back. She lifted and carried it to her bed and undid the clamps securing the box and then lifted the lid. Ivan's eyes widened a little at what lied in the red velvet lining on the inside of the container. Katyusha lifted the object from inside and let the end touch the floor. She turned to Ivan and looked really comfortable with the object.

"This is my staff." She said as she ran her hand up the staff to the deep purple orb at the top. "You and Natalia don't know, but when I was younger I was quite a skilled mage myself." She said, and Ivan simply looked a bit lost for words. "This staff saved my life and those of my companions several times, and seeing as when you get to the College, you'll probably be paired with someone to do jobs with, this will be of more help to you and your partner than it will sitting in my closet." She said and leaned the staff toward Ivan. He took it into his hands carefully, and instantly felt a strange rush through his body. Katyusha seemed to realize it and she chuckled. "This old thing still has a lot of power left, so be careful with it, all right?" she said.

Ivan nodded and gripped the staff tightly and brought it close to him. The staff was just a few inches shorter than him, so he could see the purple orb imbedded in the top of it. There were little clouds of a lighter purple whirling around inside the orb; Ivan guessed that this was where the staff's magic was contained.

"Would you like to know how it works?" Katyusha smiled at her brother, and he nodded. "Cast a fireball with your free hand, and grip the staff firmly." She instructed and Ivan followed, lifting his hand and letting a ball of fire fill the palm of his hand. "Now pour a tiny bit of magic into the staff with your other hand." Ivan did this as well, and he felt the fireball in his other hand suddenly burst into a much larger flame.

"Whoa whoa!" Katyusha shouted and put her hands over the sides of the flame that was burning out of control, there was a barrier around her hands and was now containing the flame. "I said a _tiny_ bit." She said and smiled nervously. Ivan apologized and she moved her hands away from the flame. "Try again, but be careful." She said.

Ivan attempted it again and this time the flame simply grew a bit larger and hotter. Katyusha smiled happily and clapped her hands together.

"Wonderful! You did it!" she beamed proudly. "Now, this staff will enhance your spells, whatever they may be, but it will also help those around you." She said as she stepped back from her brother a few feet. She suddenly lifted her hands and let two flames burn in each as well, which came as a bit of a shock to Ivan because he had never seen his sister use destructive type magic before. She looked intimidating and different.

Ivan nodded a bit to her and then let less of his magic flow into the staff, and as a reaction the fire in Katyusha's hands grew in size as well. She smiled and then snuffed her flames out.

"Very good. However you still have to be careful: the staff doesn't know your friends from foes, so you have to put some of your own emotion into it, that way you don't make the monsters you fight stronger. Just use your heart and the staff will recognize your allies are and you should be fine." She explained.

"All right, I think I got it." He said and stopped using his magic as well. He looked at the staff and noticed that the purple orb on top had brightened and it was almost the same color as his eyes.

"One last thing, you can shrink the staff by using magic and wanting it too, that way it'll be easier to travel with." She said with a smile.

Ivan nodded and then looked back to the orb, "Kat... what else did you do when you were younger?" he asked.

"Well..." she started and sat down on the edge of her bed. She folded her hands over her lap and smiled softly. "I used to be a member of the College." This fact shocked Ivan. "It was a few years before mother and father passed away, I met a good friend named Elizaveta there and we ended up being partners and roomed together. I stayed for about a year, but then I got hurt, and because _I_ got hurt, _she_ got hurt. So I left." She sighed, "I'm not cut out for fighting like you and she are, so I came home and took care of my family." She smiled.

Ivan gave a sad smile in return. "Is she still at the College?" he asked.

"I think so. She might be a professor by now. She always wanted to teach others how to fight and use destructive magic." She said. "Say, if you see her there, tell her 'Kat says hi', all right?"

Ivan nodded a little, "Of course."

"Wonderful. Now, I'll go start a nice meal for the three of us before we see you off, all right?"

Katyusha stood up at that moment and hurried out of her room. Ivan soon followed but went to his room to finish packing.

.

About an hour after Katyusha showed Ivan how to use his new staff, she called him for the meal. And what a meal it was. Several meats were lined along the table, fresh bread, ale, and some fruit.

"Take a seat~" Katyusha said as she was already seated at the table with Natalia. Ivan sat between the two girls and smiled. Katyusha began dishing up plates for the three of them and poured drinks. She prepared her finest meal for the last family meal Ivan would have with them for a while.

Ivan ate everything on his plate, wanting to fill up before he left since he didn't know when he'd next be eating in the comfort of home with the company of his sisters.

They talked for a while, but then Katyusha stood up.

"Ivan, I know saying goodbye is hard, but you should get going soon." She said. "It's getting late and there is an inn along the route to the College but if you leave soon you'll make it just before nightfall."

Natalia nodded in agreement. "There's a forest around there too, which could be dangerous at night, so you really should leave soon..."

Ivan set his fork down on his plate gently, silently agreeing that he should take off before it got any later. He pushed his chair back and then stood up.

"All right, I'll go get my bags, and then I'll leave." He said and then walked away. He wore a smile, but as he walked back to his room he felt a pang of guilt and sadness overtake him. He left home a lot and he would never miss home, but that was because there was the promise of always going home after he was finished. He didn't know where he was going or the people there. He'd have to make a new home at the College, and while he knew he would be all right, there was that nagging feeling of what if he failed and things don't go the way he plans?

He thought about it the entire time he finished packing his clothes into another bag, and yet he still came to the same conclusion. He was still going to the College.

.

He finished his packing and ended up with two bags: one filled with clothes and the other with books, along with his new staff tucked safely in a small pouch hanging off his side. He left his room and ventured into the living room area where his two sisters stood waiting. He couldn't help but smile at them, and he went over to them and took them both into a hug.

Katyusha returned the hug but then spoke. "We're going with you to purchase a horse." She said.

Ivan stepped back and looked a bit confused, but then he just sighed with an exhausted smile on his face.

The three walked out of there little house together and walked hand in hand, with Ivan in the middle of the two girls. They often did this when walking together and some people would look at them strangely but they really didn't care in the end. They continued on until they reached the stables, where Katyusha walked inside and purchased a horse. The man working there came out with her and the other two followed as they walked to where they kept the horses. The man led a brown horse with light tan spots on out of the stable and over to Katyusha, who then took the reins and walked over to Ivan.

"Here, this is your new companion, her name is Riverwind." Katyusha said and held the reins out to her brother.

He took them and looked at the horse before reaching his hand out slowly. His finger grazed the horse's head and it nudged back against him. He smiled and slowly began petting the animal and it did nothing to protest. He rubbed up and down the horse's snout and it snorted softly at him, the horse seemed to really like Ivan already, which was good and would make riding it easier.

He lifted his bags and secured them onto the saddle with thick leather straps. After pulling the straps tightly he turned to his two sisters who were both watching him. He smiled and held out his arms to them both, gesturing them to come in for a hug. The two girls walked to him and wrapped their arms around him, one around the other sister as well, while Ivan hugged them both close and tight.

"I'll come back and visit as soon as we get a break or if I'm in the area on a job." He promised.

Katyusha smiled and nodded, thinking how nice it was to see that Ivan was set on making this work. "You'll do great out there, the College needs more mages like you." She said.

Ivan buried his head between his two sisters. He wanted to make this moment last since he wasn't sure when the next time he'd see them again. However after what felt like minutes, Katyusha peeled herself away and gently cupped Ivan's face in her hands.

"You should get going." She said. "Make us proud and have fun. After all, last time I was there, the College had a few colorful characters." She said with a smile.

Ivan simply nodded with a crooked smile, and Katyusha pulled him in for a small kiss on the cheek.

Natalia had both her arms wrapped tightly around her brother's stomach. She was happy that he was going to do what he wanted but she was very protective of him and didn't like not being able to see him every day. Ivan pulled on her arms a little so that he could look down at her face.

"Don't worry, I'll be back soon." He said with a smile, and Natalia simply stared up. "... I'll tell you what, if I find any cool looking blades, I'll be sure to bring them home to you." He said. This time Natalia cracked a small smile and hugged her brother again. Ivan wrapped an arm around Katyusha again and gave both of them a kiss on the top of their head before pulling away finally.

After a silent moment, Ivan mounted his horse and then pet its neck softly. The horse moved around a little, seeming a bit restless.

"You'll find the inn down this road. Stay on it and you'll have no trouble. Once you're there ask the innkeeper for directions to the College and he'll help you." Katyusha instructed and smiled, and gave a "shoo" motion with her hand, as if telling him to hurry.

Ivan laughed a little and nodded, giving a short wave to his sisters and then he gave the reins a small whip. The horse went into a slow pace, but then after a few seconds took off down the road, running fast and kicking up dust and dirt behind them.

.

The first half hour of riding was thrilling. There was just something about moving fast with the wind blowing through his hair. Knowing that he was doing something new with his life filled him with this sort of adrenalin. It felt fantastic. However it soon wore off and his horse was just trotting nicely down the road. He was still happy though, and he simply took in his surroundings. The trees were swaying in the summer breeze, full and green. Flowers dotted a lot of the road and wildflowers disappeared into the trees in the distance. Small animals were running around as well, and birds flew over Ivan's head gracefully and chirped. The sun was beating down on his back and it started to make him really warm, so with one hand he undid the belts on the front of his robe and let the upper piece fall down so he could get his arms free. The robe was tied tight around his waist so the robe didn't fully fall off. He felt better now, having a tight fitting shirt underneath that had the sleeves cut off at the shoulders.

The traveling grew boring after another 2 hours, and he found himself becoming sleepy. The sun was nearly set and the road was darkening. However a small flickering lantern could be seen in the distance and he whipped the reins of his horse gently to speed the creature up. After a moment he realized it was the inn that his sister spoke of, and he sighed with relief. A few long minutes went by and he finally guided his tired horse into the fenced in area of the inn before sliding himself off of the animal. He tied the horse to the fence by a trough so the horse could eat and drink, and then fixed his robe so it looked proper before he walked inside the inn.

He instantly got a few strange looks from the people inside, though there weren't too many. A man in all black robes in the back, hiding his face from sight. A woman sitting by herself and drinking, and another man with pale skin and red eyes who was giving him a seemingly dangerous look. He ignored them all and went to the counter and greeted the proprietor, who simply nodded in response. He asked for a room for the night and gave him his money. Ivan turned and saw the man with red eyes stand up and he suddenly froze.

"Don't worry about him." The proprietor said, catching Ivan's attention. The red-eyed man then walked up by Ivan. "He's a friend and he's harmless. A vampire, sure, but harmless." The man assured him.

Ivan turned to face said vampire, who was now giving him a fanged smile, his red eyes glowing dimly. The man extended a hand to him. "It's a pleasure to meet you." He said with a bow. "My name is Vincent, and I ask you not to worry; you'll not find yourself with punctures in your neck in the morning, I promise." The man had a bit of an accent, but Ivan couldn't place what it was.

Ivan looked down at the hand and hesitantly took it. The man's hand was nearly as cold as ice and it kind of shocked Ivan in all honesty. He had never met a vampire before, and they seemed intimidating with those eyes. "Ivan." He said his name, and the vampire smiled a happy smile, like he was glad that Ivan wasn't trying to cut his head off.

Ivan soon had a drink in his hand and was sitting with the vampire and owner of the inn and exchanging life stories. Vincent was turned into a vampire some 200 years ago and had stopped drinking blood shortly after. When Ivan asked how the two met each other, the proprietor said that Vincent saved him from a pack of wolves a few years back, and ever since then they've been friends. He lets him eat and stay at the inn for free, and in return, Vincent acts as a bodyguard for him.

Ivan enjoyed their story, and enjoyed seeing that the two had such a tight bond. A human and a mythical creature. It was rare in this time, since most mythical creatures when into hiding a few years back when they began to be shunned by those who couldn't cast magic. However some of them were accepted, but vampire certainly weren't on that list.

After downing some ale with his two new acquaintances, Ivan dragged himself up to his room, which was nicer than he had expected it to be from the looks of the outside of the inn. He settled into his bed after removing his robes and, he placed Natalia's dagger on the table next to his bed before pulling his blanket up over himself, and drifted to sleep.

.

He woke up early the next morning and dressed himself, donning his robes and lacing his boots. Downstairs in the inn, the proprietor was setting out clean glasses on his counter and cleaning some others.

The man soon noticed Ivan though and greeted him with a smile and a "Good morning." Ivan bowed his head a bit and returned the greeting before asking, "Where's Vincent?"

The man laughed a little and smiled. "It's after 5am, so he's sleeping now. He _is_ a vampire, y'know." He joked a little. Ivan simply nodded and took a seat at the counter, folding his arms over each other in front of him.

"I'm in need of directions..." he started, "I want to find the College of Torchlight; I was told you could help."

The man stayed silent for a moment as he finished cleaning a glass, and then placed it on the counter. "You'll want to keep heading west on this road. Eventually you come to a strange part of the forest where the colors change. Look for a large dead tree on the left and there'll be a dirt path leading deep into the forest." He instructed. "Keep on that and you'll come across the College."

"Thank you." Ivan said and then stood up.

"What business do you have with the College?" the proprietor asked. There was clearly some sort of distaste in his voice.

The Russian simply glanced to him, "I'm going to join them." He said.

"I see..." the other man said and sighed, "Well be careful. They don't have the cleanest reputation; known for causing some bad things and whatnot. However their mages are extremely talented and their fighters are terrifying." He said, "Good luck to you then."

Ivan nodded in response, "I'll be off now. Thank you for everything. And when Vincent wakes up, tell him I said it was nice to meet him as well."

The proprietor simply nodded as well, and Ivan walked to the doorway and left the inn.

Outside he was reunited with his horse, which neighed happily when it saw him. He smiled and gently petted the horse's snout to calm her down. "Easy River, it's all right." He whispered out a bit, trying to get the animal to relax. After she did, Ivan reattached his bags to the saddle and untied her from the fence, and then mounted the horse. He gave a gentle whip and guided the horse out of the fenced in area of the inn and turned onto the road. Whipping a bit more brought his horse into a full sprint through the morning air.

The road looked the same for a long time, but then in the distance he suddenly noticed the forest changing. The green leaves that he had seen the entire way here were suddenly turning into yellows, oranges, and reds. Ivan remembered the proprietor at the inn mentioning that the forest changed, but it looked so _bizarre_. It looked like there was a line cutting between the forests and one half was green and the other half different colors. He stopped at the edge of the green and spotted something strange. The leaves on one of the trees were mostly orange and red but the tips of some were still green. As the breeze blew the branches, the green would disappear and reappear. Like some sort of field around this area was causing the leaves to be a different color. He pressed on and passed through the 'barrier' and slowed his horse. It was like he had just walked through another dimension. Everything was so bright and the air even had a magical feel to it. He instructed his horse to walk and it did, slowly trotting down the broken stone road. He then thought about the name of the College.

Torchlight. This forest is often referred to as TorchlightForest, but he always thought the College was named after the forest it was built in, but he was beginning to think otherwise.

He continued on until he found the dead tree that the man from before had spoken of. It was certainly out of place and strange looking being surrounded by all these colorful alive trees. He slowed his horse again and noticed something nailed to the tree. It was a small sign that read, "Keep out" in the generic 'threatening' font, but he ignored it and whipped his reins gently and turned onto the small dirt path. After moving a few feet from the tree something suddenly smacked into the back of Ivan's head and he yelped out a little. He turned his head and his eyes widened at what he saw. The sign on the tree was now hovering in the air, but where "Keep out" was previously written now said "We knew you wouldn't listen"

Ivan swallowed dryly, "That's a bit creepy..." he mumbled to himself, and then the sign fell to the dirt and lied there motionlessly. He tried to shake the feeling of being watched and continued down the road. He caught a glimpse of something gray and he squinted to see it, and he soon began to make out the structure of a stone wall. He rode faster, and the building grew in height as he neared it and he gazed at it in awe. The building was massive and didn't look this big from the road. There was a stone arch that seemed to be the entrance so he headed toward it.

As he neared, suddenly a small person walked between the arch and blocked his path, and he stopped. The person pulled back their hood and it was revealed that she was a fairly old woman. She watched Ivan carefully as he pulled his reins to stop his horse, and he hesitantly got off of it.

The woman took a few steps forward. "Who are you, and what do you want?"

Ivan studied the other for a moment before speaking. "My name is Ivan Braginski, and I wish to join the College." He said simply.

A small smile tugged at her lips. "It's been a while since we'd had one of you." She said and she walked past Ivan and gestured with one of her hands for the other to follow, and he did, albeit hesitantly. "If you can draw my blood, then you may join." She said.

Ivan's eyes widened a little, "I'm not going to fight an old woman." He said.

The other laughed, but it was more of an amused cackle. "Oh, you won't be fighting an old woman." She said and then clapped her hands together and her entire body was suddenly engulfed in a large cloud of black smoke. Ivan heard a roar from behind the smoke and he backed up as a figure could be seen behind it, and suddenly a small dragon a bit larger than a bear flew up into the air in front of him, did a flip and then fluttered back to the ground.

The scales of the dragon were a deep blue, like sapphire, and Ivan stood there in awe.

"I am the guardian of the College of Torchlight, and anyone who desires to join their ranks must draw my blood to prove themselves. Cast well, Ivan Braginski."

The dragon spoke and then flapped its wings hard, causing dust to fling up around it, and took flight again. Ivan couldn't help a grin from pulling his lips up. He had never seen a dragon before, and he was a bit thrilled to fight one. He pushed his cloak apart a little and pulled his dagger, the one Natalia gave him, from its sheath and flung it around in his hand expertly, the sharp blade pointing to the side. His other hand twitched and small sparks surrounded it before lighting and engulfing his hand in flames.

The dragon picked up speed in the air, flying around but not attacking. Ivan tested it by throwing a few fireballs from his hand, and all of them missed, but the dragon still did not attack. It only let out a roar that could probably be heard for miles. Ivan threw another fireball at the dragon and this time it hit, slamming right into the side of the scaly monster. However, no blood dropped.

The fireball hitting her caused her to flinch slightly and she began to fly erratically, confusing Ivan as he basically ran in circles throwing fireballs around. The dragon would fly down close and knock him to the ground, or flap its wings toward him to try to distract him with unnatural wind being blown at him.

He suddenly got an idea and placed his dagger back in its sheath, and he held his hands a few inches apart and let a fireball grow between them. Soon the ball of flames was growing larger and hotter and Ivan felt sweat building up on his forehead. He watched the dragon and tried his best to predict its unpredictable movements, and then he let the fireball fly. It soared through the sky and hit exactly where he had hoped to hit; the dragon's wing.

The creature let out a loud shriek and its wing crippled and it plummeted to the ground, hitting the earth with a low thud. The dragon twitched its injured wing, and turned its giant head to Ivan as he neared her.

The Russian whipped out his dagger again and walked near the dragon's head. He could see some fear in her eyes, thinking the man before her was going to slice her open. She squeezed her eyes shut and prepared herself, but shock overcame her when all she felt was a tiny prick to her scaly cheek. She let out a low confused growl, one that didn't sound intimidating but rather confused. She opened her eyes to discover that Ivan had simply poked her cheek enough to draw a tiny drop of blood, and he pulled the dagger away, smiling softly at the creature before him.

Suddenly, the black smoke from before hid the dragon's body from Ivan's view, and soon the woman was soon revealed from under it again in her human form. She had a small cut on her left cheek that was bleeding just slightly. The woman stood to her feet with ease and gently wiped the blood from her cheek with her thumb; she then turned to Ivan and bowed respectfully.

"Not many can knock me out of the sky..." she said. "I'm impressed. You're a bit of a pyro, aren't you?" The comment made Ivan give a crooked grin, knowing that it was partly true. "You'll fit in just fine here. We always get the weird ones." She said and turned away, walking toward the stone arch. She lifted her hand into the air and made a gesture for Ivan to follow. "Follow me, and bring your horse as well."

.

With the reins of Riverwind in his hand, he followed the old woman through the arc, which led to a stone bridge leading across a medium sized lake. In the distance at the end of the bridge was a building that looked to be two stories high and made from the same stone as the bridge. He walked and followed behind the old woman as they crossed the bridge. Eventually the two came into a large circular courtyard. Ivan glanced around and suddenly there was an explosion in the distance. The Russian gasped, having been taken off-guard and the old woman cackled loudly.

"Get used to that, you'll be hearing it a lot." She said, not stopping or even being affected by the loud noise. "Those are just some of the students practicing with each other. Ms. Elizaveta is probably training them." She explained.

"Elizaveta?" he repeated, recognizing the name. "My sister used to go here with her, said they were partners."

The old woman suddenly stopped and Ivan stopped as well. She turned her head to him, "Braginski... I thought that name sounded familiar. You're Katyusha's brother, aren't you?" she asked, and Ivan nodded. "I see... well, I'm sure Elizaveta would like to hear how her dear friend is. I'll take you to her." She said and began walking again. Ivan thought for a moment as he continued to follow the woman. She remembered Katyusha almost instantly, but he supposed that maybe as the gatekeeper, she remembers everyone who enters the College.

Soon the two were near the entrance to what looked like a main hall, and to the side was a woman with long light brown hair in steel armor and wielding a sword. The old woman and Ivan walked up behind her and waited for her to catch a break from her students.

"Elizaveta, I have someone you should meet." The older woman said. The armored woman turned and blinked her green eyes at the two. "This is Ivan Braginski, Katyusha's brother." She introduced him.

Elizaveta suddenly beamed a bright smile and walked to Ivan, "I've heard so much about you from Katyusha. How is she doing these days?" the woman smiled.

"She's great." Ivan returned her smile, "She told me to say hello to you for her."

"She's such a sweetie; I'll have to visit her soon." She said.

"I don't mean to interrupt," the old woman jutted in, "but Ivan here is joining the College. He'll need to talk to Roderich and get his classes, if he wishes to take any, and his dorm set up." She said.

Elizaveta nodded and looked to her students in the field, "We're all done for today, you may go back to your dorms if you wish!" she said to them and then snapped her fingers, which suddenly made her armor and weapon disappear, she was left in a long fancy looking dress, much like ones his sisters would wear. The magic shocked Ivan, never having seen such a spell before.

"I'll take care of your horse." The old woman said, and gripped onto the reins. Ivan took a moment to remove his bags from his horse and lifted them over his shoulders.

"Come with me, dear." Elizaveta said and waved her hand toward Ivan, gesturing for her to follow. The Russian complied and followed her, but he glanced over his shoulder to the old woman, who was now heading back across the bridge to where they had previously fought.

"So, you're Kat's kid brother, hm?" Elizaveta asked and looked over her shoulder as she walked, "My, you sure are handsome~" She giggled when Ivan turned a light pink. "I'm sure she told you about the College then?" She asked as she opened the door to the large stone building.

"She said a little, but not too much." He replied.

"You'll figure it out in due time." She said, and led Ivan into the building.

"This is the main hall." She said, putting her hands on her hips. "This is where we hold formal dances once in a while. Other than that it's pretty useless." She said and took a right. "Down here is where all the classrooms are. Roderich is probably teaching his potions class right now but Arthur will be able to fill in for him." She said.

"Arthur?" Ivan asked.

"He's another teacher here at Torchlight. Fancies turning people into things with ears and tails, sometimes wings too. He's a bit strange and has a funny accent but he's powerful; he's the only one who's ever knocked Beatrice out of the sky when he came here."

Ivan took a moment to connect the name Beatrice to the old woman, but when he did, he smiled a little, remembering the old dragon-woman say that she was rarely knocked from the sky. Also he was now in the same league as this Arthur guy.

Soon Elizaveta walked into a classroom, there weren't many people here but there were a few. They mostly gave Ivan a strange look, but that was normal since he was new here.

"Roderich, I have a new addition to our family that I need you to take care of." Elizaveta said.

The man at the counter turned around and pushed his glasses up, and then looked over to Ivan and gave his entire body a quick scan. "I see. He seems prepared enough. What is his name?"

For a moment Ivan looked to Elizaveta like Roderich was asking her, but once the brown haired woman raised an eyebrow at him, he quickly answered, "My name is Ivan Braginski." He said.

"Braginski? Braginski... why does that sound familiar..." He wondered, looking like he was pretty deep in thought about it.

"He's Katyusha's younger brother." Elizaveta said like it meant something.

"You don't say..." Roderich said and then patted Ivan's shoulder as he passed him. "Well then, follow me." He said and picked up a bag at the door. "Arthur, you're in charge until I get back."

"All right." A voice came from somewhere in the room. A blond short-haired man stood up and went to the front of the room. Ivan looked at him, the man didn't look like a powerful mage, but then again, neither did Ivan.

Roderich then suddenly slapped the back of Ivan's head, earning an "Ow!" from the Russian. "Your attention span is something we'll need to work on. I don't have all day to be babysitting you so let's hurry up, shall we?" the dark brown haired man said, pushing his glasses up again.

Ivan nodded a bit and Roderich turned, "Very good, let's be off." He said and then headed out of the room.

Ivan followed the man back through the main hall that Elizaveta showed him earlier, "Down here are the dorms, which is where you'll be staying, and not blowing the walls up like _some_ students preferred doing." He said. Ivan simply nodded silently with a small smile on his face. "You'll be alone for now, since our last student, erm... had an accident and is no longer with us at the College." He said. Ivan got the impression that the student died or something. Which wasn't at _all_ creepy.

Roderich led Ivan into an empty room and lit a candle by pointing his finger at it. A bolt of lightning shot from his fingertip and caused the wick of the candle to light.

"Make yourself at home, and feel free to wander around the College. I'll give you an official tour tomorrow and we can set up classes if you want them, or you can simply practice what you already know." He said, "Elizaveta handles jobs as well, so if you want work, talk to her."

"Got it." Ivan said and dropped his heavy bags onto the bottom bed of a bunk in the room.

"One last thing: try not to get anyone killed." Roderich said with an exhausted face. "If you want to kill yourself by conducting dangerous experiments, go right ahead, but make sure to inform Elizaveta or myself or do it outside of College grounds."

Ivan smiled nervously. "All right." He said.

"Good, I'll let you get settled, and I'll see you tomorrow." He said and then left, closing the door behind him.

Ivan stood there for a moment and he breathed in heavily. He was on his own without his sisters and for some reason he actually felt good about that fact. He sat down on the edge of his bed and then brought out his dagger and held it out in front of him. He looked at it intensely, seeing his own reflection in the silver. He supposed he wasn't _completely_ without his sisters; he had Natalia with him in his dagger, and Katyusha was with him in his scarf.

He laid down on the mattress, liking how soft it was. His room was rather nice as well; he was a bit shocked with the quality of the covers on the bed, and the other furniture in the room. He stared up at the ceiling, and then thought that this change in his life was good, and that he was actually happy to be here.

.

**~Nearly 3 Months Later~**

Ivan found himself feeling invigorated as he plunged his dagger deep into his enemies neck, hearing its screech stutter out and then fall silent, and then falling heavily onto the dirt. He pulled his blade from the creature's neck and flicked it around, some blood flinging off and dotting the grass around him, and then he wiped it clean with a cloth he had hanging from a belt around his waist.

"Another job done." He sighed out a little. Being with the college had changed him, he enjoyed ridding the world of these monsters, and being paid to do it was also nice, but also having a place to study magic freely was wonderful. He had developed a reputation within College walls that he's not only a powerful mage, but a decent fighter as well. Elizaveta would compliment him on his technique and style, and knowing his way around a blade.

The first week or two was a bit rough. Getting settled, meeting his colleagues, making sure he didn't blow something up in Roderich's potion class. People thought he was a bit strange since he was physically a bit larger than the others and he tended to be quiet and had an air of creepiness about him, but he was also beginning to fully enjoy killing monsters, like it filled him with adrenaline or something.

He still didn't have a roommate, though, and that made it kind of depressing to go back to his room knowing that he couldn't discuss his day with someone or chat with someone about magic. He spent a lot of time in his room since the College didn't force its students to take classes.

Regardless, things were just getting a bit lonely, though he would be visiting his sisters in a few months for their winter break. Of course, he could just leave at any moment, but he did take some classes and he wanted to stick around until most of the other students left as well.

Back in his room at the College, he slumped over on his bed, feeling a bit exhausted from fighting today. He was really looking forward to seeing his sisters again. That week would be fantastic, and he couldn't wait to share his experiences so far with them.

* * *

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	3. Welcome to the College

**[Originally posted: 8/21/2013]**

•The use of the word "Sector" in this story refers to the different races of Elves. I.e; Gilbert belongs to the Neirunian Sector.

.

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Use of alcohol. Fighting. Slight blood. Language.**

* * *

The summers in TorchlightForest are beautiful. Well, it's always beautiful regardless of the season, but summer just has this special air about it and the sound of the leaves brushing against one another, and dancing together like flickering flames, it just brought a certain feeling to everyone who entered the forest, like you were lost in this magical world beyond the real one. Everyone at the College felt this way and knew the beauty around them, and Ivan was beginning to realize it too. For the last few weeks, Roderich had been asking Ivan to join him in collecting ingredients for his potions. Ivan was happy to go along, and since no one else would go with Roderich, he figured that it'd be the right thing to do.

Roderich was a quiet man, unless you got him talking about something he particularly likes or dislikes. He's very opinionated and prefers things his way or at least very neat or logical. Ivan didn't mind though, sometimes he's even started an argument purely for the sake of hearing someone talk for hours, and Roderich always did.

Ivan had grown used to life at the college, and he loved it more than he imagined he would. He fit in perfectly with the group, he was strong but he had this roughness to him that one needed to have when out on their own like this. If you're too weak, the wild will swallow you whole. Also, everyone at the College had their little quirks that made them a bit weird. Roderich enjoyed making poisons for no reason and he always wore a creepy grin when brewing them. Elizaveta was just a bit scary in general, but her passion for weaponry borders insanity. Arthur's weirdness was previously mentioned by Elizaveta with the whole "turning-people-into-animals-and-pixies" thing. Ivan though... he just liked fire a bit too much; a hot dancing flame never failed to bring a grin to his face.

Ivan had parted from Roderich to gather some of his own ingredients, while the other male went down to a small lake connected to a river to find something called "Moon Root", it's apparently a special plant that grows only by bodies of water and lives for only 24 hours after a full moon. It's pretty rare so Roderich _obviously_ wants to get his hands on it.

Ivan knelt down to a small wildflower to appreciate the fineness of it with a soft smile, he may be rough but he appreciated beauty when he saw it and usually couldn't help himself from reaching out and touching it.

Suddenly, he heard Roderich yell his name and for him to come to him, in a strangely worried tone.

Roderich was about 20 feet from the Russian and he was staring at a nearby lake. He was quite shocked to see what he was seeing and he quickly went down to investigate.

"My god." He breathed out.

There was a person washed up on the bank of the lake, and Roderich slid down the small mound of dirt to where they were. They had a bow around their shoulder, and Roderich removed it so he could flip the person over. He instantly gasped at how pale the woman was, and how small and skinny she was, she looked like she hadn't eaten in a long time. He put a finger to her neck and sighed when he felt a pulse, and he instantly lifted her arm over his shoulder to lift her up. A few strands of hair fell from behind the woman's hood and it was as white as winter snow, something Roderich was fairly shocked to see.

He carried the wet and heavy body up the small hill where he met with Ivan, who simply stared wide-eyed at the two.

"What happened? Who is this?" the Russian asked.

"I'm not sure; she was just washed up on the shoreline." He said, looking down at the woman's hanging head. "We should get her back to the college so I can treat any injuries if she has any. Grab her bow there, and follow me." He said and then moved to walk past Ivan.

Ivan watched Roderich carry the woman, thinking that something seemed a bit familiar about her, but he couldn't place what. He lifted the bow off of the ground and thought it was strange how detailed the bow was. He studied it for a moment and then shrugged it off. He swung his bag over his shoulder and followed the other back to the college.

.

Roderich had laid the woman on a bed in the infirmary, and only when he removed her clothes did he realize that she was actually a very fair-skinned and petit man, and he felt kind of stupid for that. However he was more shocked to see the man's long white hair and those pointed ears of his.

Roderich tended to the bloody cut on the man's pale arm, washing it with some potion he had made earlier and wrapping it in a white bandage.

He heard someone approach and looked at the door to see Elizaveta and Ivan waiting in the doorframe.

"How is she?" Elizaveta asked.

"Well, '_she'_ is actually a '_he'_, and he'll be fine. His injuries aren't too severe and he'll wake up soon."

As he spoke, the two others walked in. Ivan especially took a long hard look at the unconscious man on the bed. He felt a fire rise in him, just looking at the man's face boiled his blood. He didn't even realize that he had cursed out loud.

"Ivan? You all right?" Elizaveta asked.

"No." the Russian replied simply. "I know who this is and I don't like him." He said.

"How do you know him?" Roderich asked, pushing his glasses up a little.

"From another magic school that we went to in our teens. He's the one who-" he paused, "Never mind. We just never got along, to say the least."

"Well that was years ago, maybe he's changed?" Elizaveta suggested.

Ivan turned his back, "People like him don't change." He said and walked out of the room.

Elizaveta called Ivan's name and began to walk after him, but Roderich grabbed her arm and stopped her. "Let him be. These two obviously have a bad history, so it'd be best to let him cool down for a while."

Elizaveta simply nodded in agreement.

.

Elizaveta and Roderich stayed by the bed and waited for the pale man to wake up, and sure enough, about 2 hours later, the man began to groan softly and stir awake. His eyes blinked open a little and he seemed to take a moment before realizing that he was inside somewhere.

He suddenly shot up from the bed and waved his hands in front of himself quickly, creating a shield of ice in front of his body for protection. He noticed that he was naked aside from undergarments, but that was the least of his worries.

The man glared at Roderich but then he suddenly twitched and let out a sharp gasp of pain, the shield of ice shattered and fell in pieces onto the man's lap and quickly melted into water. He gripped his injured arm tightly with his hand and felt blood oozing out of it; he had reopened his wound when he cast his magic.

Roderich stood up and held his hands in front of himself, "Calm down, you're all right." He said, "We're not going to hurt you."

"Who are you?" he spoke defensively, but he looked a bit scared toward the other male.

Roderich sat back in his chair, "I'm Roderich Edelstein," he introduced himself and then pointed a finger toward the woman in the room, "And this is Elizaveta Héderváry. We're professors at the College of Torchlight, which is where you are now."

"..." there was a silence from the albino as he stared blankly at the dark brown haired man in front of him. "You're kidding...?" to which Roderich shook his head, "You mean to tell me that I traveled for a week, nearly dying and starving, just to pass out and be taken to the very place I was looking for?" he said in slight annoyance. "That's just perfect."

Elizaveta let out a soft chuckle, "Why don't you tell us your name?" she asked politely.

The albino looked at her strangely before answering. "Gilbert Beilschmidt."

"And why are you looking for the College, Gilbert?" Roderich questioned.

"I want to join." Gilbert said simply.

"I see... well, to do that you have to pass a test, but it wouldn't be fair to let you take that test while injured..." Roderich said.

"We could have him stay until he recovers enough before he goes and meets Beatrice." Elizaveta suggested, looking to Roderich.

"I think I can handle your little test." Gilbert said, giving an annoyed glance to the woman.

Roderich smiled softly. "You shouldn't assume that this is just some normal test, Gilbert; you might just get yourself killed." His tone was soft but it gave Gilbert a chill that he blamed on the ice water on his lap. "Anyway, why don't you tell us what happened to you, Gilbert?" Roderich asked as he pulled the blanket that was over Gilbert's lap off of him.

"Uh, well..." Gilbert started, and paused when Roderich suddenly lifted his arm and began to undo the bandage. He was going to pull away but the pain in his arm convinced him not to. "I was chasing a deer down for food, and while I was getting ready to shoot, a bunch of damn gremlins came out of a cave near where I was and decided that it'd be fun to try to eat me." He said, he looked a bit embarrassed about the fact but there was a tone of humor in his voice.

"I see." Roderich said and finished tightening a clean bandage around the albino's arm, "The Gremlins around here are nasty creatures, you're lucky you got away with just a cut on your arm." He said.

"I guess." Gilbert sighed and slumped his shoulders down a bit, and simply sat by as Roderich finished tending to his wound.

Suddenly Elizaveta came over to Gilbert and began to push his hair away from his ears, and he flinched slightly from her touch. "They're pointed..." she mumbled, "Are you an Elf of some sort?"

Gilbert craned his head toward the brown haired woman and gave her a strangely frightened look. His people had been driven underground thousands of years ago because of how they started the Great War, and then were driven underground when they were defeated by the Empire. Gilbert new this history and he knew that many on the surface despised Elves, especially his particular kind. However he did have a slight advantage in this situation. Since he's albino, it would be hard to determine which group of Elves he hails from, since most races of Elves have a certain skin tone or hair color, and his people were fairly dark skinned, which was odd for living underground.

"Uh, yeah... I am." He finally responded.

"Ooh~! What sector are you from!?" She asked energetically, "I've heard so many stories about you Elves, you're always so powerful, and-" She suddenly cupped Gilbert's face in her hands and rubbed her thumb along his cheek bone, "Elves are always so pretty, even the males. Your skin is so fair, you look like a prince~" she said, her eyes seeming to sparkle with delight.

Gilbert felt his cheeks burn with some embarrassment but he flinched away from her hand at the last comment. "W-Well I'm not! I'm _just_ an Elf." He said. He didn't want anyone finding out about him being a prince.

"Strange..." Roderich said and lifted a few strands of Gilbert's white hair. The man inspected the strands as Elizaveta went back to gazing at his ears. "You have white hair and red-ish eyes; you look nothing like the Elves I've met before."

"Stop that!" Gilbert swatted at Roderich's hand and moved away from Elizaveta. He felt a bit trapped and it was a feeling he didn't particularly like. "My eyes are _pink_, I'm _albino_. I'm not a demon _nor_ am I a host for one." He said with an irritation that could only be from having to repeat the sentence several times; it was basically his catchphrase.

"I assume many have accused you of such?" Roderich asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Way too many, and too often."

"Well you'd probably fit in better here if you were." Elizaveta said with a smile, "We're all a bit strange here, and Arthur probably would love if you were a demon."

Gilbert's eyebrows pulled together and he glared softly at the woman. He sensed that she was joking with him, but the whole "him-being-a-demon" thing wasn't a fun topic for him.

"Anyway." Roderich said and locked his hands together in front of his chest, "Elizaveta, why don't you go make sure that our resident pyro hasn't blown anything up, and I'll tend to Gilbert and get him back on his feet."

Elizaveta nodded and then bowed to Gilbert, "It was nice meeting you. I look forward to having you at the College." She said, flashing a polite smile and then turned and walked out of the room with her long dress flowing behind her.

"So, how are you feeling?" Roderich asked once the woman was gone.

Gilbert moved his arm a little, "Fine, my arm's a little sore but I'll survive."

The brunet pushed his glasses up. "Good, I didn't want to embarrass you in front of a woman, but you really don't know what you're doing, do you?" he asked.

"What?" Gilbert asked, looking a bit offended.

The other man sighed with a bit of annoyance. "You're not used to being on your own in the world, right? You come in here, unconscious and then say you were nearly killed by gremlins. Really, you should just go home." He said.

"You don't understand, I _can't_ go home!" Gilbert yelled, showing a small flame of hidden emotion in his eyes, "No one there wants me; all I have is the College, that's it!"

Roderich's eyes widened at the other's outburst. "I see..." he mumbled and crossed his arms over his chest, '_He speaks as if he's already one of us._'

"Please, give me a chance. I'm stronger than I look, I promise." Gilbert pleaded, "I just hit a rough patch, but I'll bounce back." He said, and suddenly realized how desperate he sounded and looked away from the wide eyes of the other male.

Roderich sighed heavily and shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket. "Well Gilbert, you have a test to prepare for." He said and walked to the door of the infirmary; he lifted a hand and waved it, gesturing for Gilbert to follow him.

Gilbert quickly stood up. He felt his blood rush to his head and his vision went blurry and he lost his balance, tumbling to the side a little. Roderich gave him a slightly worried expression, but the albino regained his balance rather quickly, and Roderich smiled a little.

"Wait, where's my necklace?" Gilbert suddenly asked, gripping around his neck frantically.

"Wrapped in the small cloth on the table, your bow is there as well." The brown haired man said, and nodded his head toward said table.

Gilbert's eyes widened a little and looked toward where Roderich was looking. He felt relieved to see his bow and he quickly rushed to it. However he unwrapped the cloth first and sighed when he saw his cross necklace, and he laced it around his neck, letting his fingers graze over the smooth stone in the center in relief. He then picked up his bow and held it firmly in his hand.

"It has a few scratches on it but other than that, it's perfectly fine." Roderich said, "You had no arrows on you when we found you, so we'll provide you with those for your test."

Gilbert turned to Roderich with a weird look on his face, "I have to fight during this test?"

"Of course. We can't have weaklings in our College." He said with a smile, enjoying how Gilbert almost looked a bit scared, "That's your clothing there as well; you were soaked so I removed and dried them." He said.

"Oh, thank you..." Gilbert said and picked his tunic up.

"You're welcome but don't get used to it; I'm a professor not your maid." He said, "Now come."

.

After dressing in his full attire and tying his hair up in a ribbon again, Gilbert followed Roderich out of the infirmary and down a hall. They soon passed a huge open room and went down another hall. There were doors lining the hall: the dorms.

"These are the dorm rooms; you'll most likely be sharing one with one of the students." Roderich said and continued walking.

"There aren't many rooms..." Gilbert commented.

"Many members of the College don't take residency here with us, but rather at inns or their own homes throughout the continent." He said, "I'll give you some history, Gilbert. This building used to be a stronghold during the Millennium War, the war between magic and non-magic users, that's why it's so well fortified from the outside." He opened a door and went down some wooden stairs, continuing. "Anyway, FortTorchlight belonged to some Elves, some fierce warriors, but they were outnumbered and overrun by the regions' at-the-time leader, and were all killed. After that, the war went on for a few more years and the fort fell into ruins, but then Beatrice, the gatekeeper who you'll be meeting soon, sought refuge here with some friends; they were all shunned from their homes for wanting a place to study magic freely, since the result of the Millennium War was non-magic users shunning magic and most mythical creatures. Soon, word got around about Beatrice and her friends and it became the College of Torchlight. For 500 years we've been a successful College, though many dislike us for obvious reasons."

"Wow... I had no idea." Gilbert said, smiling a little. "Wait... 500 years? And the founder is still alive?"

"Of course," Roderich said and stopped in front of a locked door, he turned his head to look at Gilbert, "You'll see why when you meet her." He said and began unlocking the door.

"Is she an Elf?" Gilbert blurted out with accidental excitement.

Roderich froze for a moment and then looked toward the albino, "No, she isn't... not all Elves are immortal." He said. "Gilbert, are you an immortal Elf?" he asked.

"..." Gilbert stared down at the floor. "Not exactly, but close enough..." He said.

"Fascinating..." Roderich mumbled and then walked inside the dark room. He stood inside and told Gilbert to come in as well, and the albino did so. Once both men were inside, Roderich closed the door and then lit a small flame on his index finger. He used the flame to light a candle by the door, and somehow the entire room lit up brightly with candles placed all around the room.

"This is the armory. We keep weapons and armor down here just in case our members want some extra protection when they're out on jobs." He said, "We're not just a College of mages, you know. Elizaveta teaches combat and I teach a potions class. We're a bit of a mix of mages and fighters; we welcome all, if all can pass the test."

"I didn't know all this would be here... it's pretty awesome." Gilbert said in awe, gazing at the racks of swords and large war hammers that were bigger than his head.

"Indeed." Roderich said and continued through the armory. "So, how old _are_ you, Gilbert?" he suddenly asked, glancing over to the man.

Gilbert twitched when he heard the question and he caused an iron shield to fall over and make a terribly loud clash against the stone flooring. "I uh, I'm only 25 years old."

"Truly?" Roderich questioned with astonishment in his voice, not fully believing the other. He turned toward the flustered albino, "Aren't you immortal, or close to it?"

"Yeah, I just turned 25 a few months ago." He said and crossed his arms loosely over his chest, "My sector of Elves isn't _technically_ immortal, we still grow old but it takes a long time. We age and develop like normal humans until we're 25, and then something happens in our bodies or souls or whatever and our lifespan just lengthens greatly. Our immune systems go to hell though; once we reach about 700 years old, a simple cold can kill us if we're not careful..."

"Interesting... I've... never mind. Tell me Gilbert, what sector are you from?" Roderich asked, seeming awfully curious.

Gilbert looked down at the gray stone flooring, "I don't want to say."

"I see..."

There was a tense silence in the cold room and Roderich cleared his throat to break the silence, "Get some arrows and whatever else you think you'll need, and meet me back upstairs when you're done." He said and then walked passed the albino, leaving the room and leaving Gilbert to himself.

Gilbert sighed heavily once he was alone and he leaned back against a wall. '_I can't let them find out..._' he thought to himself and then opened his eyes after a few moments. He looked around; there were weapons from all over the province in here. From elaborately designed steel swords from the East, to the bulky stone hammers and axes of the West. However Gilbert took a liking to the weapons of the North, finely carved wood with steel blades and accents. Regardless of their beauty, though, nothing compared to his bow, the work of his own people, the work of Elves.

He began to look around, wondering if he could find any Elven weapons; since this place used to be a fort run by Elves he just assumed there would be some lying around somewhere. He went through rack after rack finding nothing but the same type of weapons, and he was about to give up. He went to the very back of the armory room and saw a few silver bows hanging on a rack and quivers of arrows lying about. He picked one up and pulled an arrow from it, long and professionally made from silver with a white feathery fletching at the end of the shaft. He put the quiver over his shoulder along with his bow and headed back up to meet with Roderich.

.

"So, how's the pyro?" Roderich asked to Elizaveta in a joking way. The two were standing in front of the large 'ballroom'.

She sighed and smiled a small nervous smile. "I found him out in the yard throwing huge fireballs at the practice dummies." She said, "Whatever Gilbert did to him in the past is something that he clearly hasn't forgotten."

"He just needs to blow off some steam. Strange though... the Elf seems fairly calm and well-mannered and like he has a chip on his shoulder." Roderich said and put his hand to his mouth, pondering. "Before we left the infirmary he said that no one back home wants him and that the College is all he has..."

"Poor guy, he was probably kicked out for looking different." Elizaveta finished saying just in time to hear a door shut.

Out from the hall at the end of the dorm hall, Gilbert was seen shutting the door behind him. He looked down the hall at the two professors, who were now smiling creepily and waving at the albino. He walked to them, smiling a bit himself.

"All set?" Roderich asked.

"Yeah, I've got my bow and some arrows; I'm ready to take on whatever you can dish out." Gilbert said proudly.

Elizaveta suddenly was behind Gilbert, and gently ran a slim finger down the curve of Gilbert's bow. "Wow, such a pretty bow. It's almost the color of your skin!" she said happily.

Gilbert flinched away, not yet used to how energetic this woman was.

"So you're an archer?" She asked and barely waited for Gilbert to nod to continue, "We don't have any archers here, but I've always loved Archery and I can't wait to see you shoot, I bet you're great at it." She said.

Gilbert took a step back from her, this woman seemed far too excited about weapons, that almost crazed look in her eyes was slightly off-putting.

"I've had some practice..." the albino said, not wanting to encourage the woman more.

"Well we'll see you shoot soon enough, firstly however, we need to get some food in you. We don't want you passing out during the test." Roderich said. "Follow me." He instructed and quickly walked away, expecting Gilbert to follow, and he did.

"I'll see you soon, Gilbert; I look forward to seeing you shoot." Elizaveta beamed a bright smile at him as the two men walked away.

"Is she _always_ that excited?" Gilbert asked as he walked with Roderich back in the direction of the infirmary.

"When it comes to weapons and armor, yes." Roderich said. "She's sweet but her passion for weaponry seems to have destroyed some of her sanity. Then again, everyone here has their quirks, I'm sure you have one as well." He said and looked over his shoulder, smiling at Gilbert.

Gilbert wouldn't have been bothered by the smile, however Roderich hadn't smiled until this moment, and it got Gilbert wondering what the Austrian's quirk was.

"Do you have any strange obsessions with anything, Gilbert?" he asked, that smile seeming to insinuate something.

"Um." Gilbert's mind went blank.

"You like catching things on fire? Watching things melt? Enjoy how cold steel makes you shiver when touched?"

"These sound more like kinks rather than quirks." Gilbert commented.

"Sometimes they're the same, no?" Roderich chuckled, "You'll fit in fine here, Gilbert, don't you worry."

Gilbert sighed with exhaustion and he wondered if he did have a 'quirk'. He cursed mentally when he suddenly wanted to run the blade of his dagger across his arm, just to see if he would twitch from it or like it.

He really hoped he wouldn't develop any strange kinks while being here; it already seemed to be starting.

.

"This is where we come to eat occasionally." Roderich said as he opened another door, and then walked in. There was a large long table in the room; it looked like a wooden version of the dining room back at the palace. The table was also set with all types of food.

"Go ahead, eat your fill." Roderich said.

Gilbert walked further into the large dining room and smiled nostalgically at it. "It reminds me of home." He said.

"Do you miss your home?" Roderich asked, noticing a tone of sadness in the Elf's voice.

Gilbert shrugged, "Home is where the heart is, right?" he said, "But... I'm not sure where mine is anymore..."

Roderich smiled softly, "Hopefully soon it'll be here." He said and Gilbert turned to look at him with surprise. "We may be a bit strange and most of the world may hate us, but you won't find better hands to trust your life in." He said.

Gilbert blinked at him for a moment and then smiled. "Thanks." He said simply and then sat down at the table. "It's hilarious. I haven't even been conscious for an hour and yet you've all welcomed me more than my own people ever did." He said.

"An outcast, are we?" Roderich asked, he then took a seat across from Gilbert and poured himself some wine.

"Basically. Since I look different from my people, they isolated and hated me, and so I locked myself in my room for years."

"That's why you're so quiet." Roderich said and lifted another glass, "Wine?" he asked.

Gilbert looked up and stared at the other male for a moment, "Yeah, sure."

Roderich smiled and poured another glass of wine and then pushed it to Gilbert. "You'll open up eventually; being here at the College definitely makes one more open." He said and thought back to how Ivan was when he first arrived a few months ago, and how now he was rough and strong, and usually blunt.

Gilbert kept quiet and gently wrapped his fingers around the glass of wine. He even _held_ things delicately, and he knew that he had to change that if he wanted to survive on his own. He could no longer be protected by his status as a prince and hide in the confines of his palace.

"So Gilbert, we know you're an archer but you cast some magic earlier as well, what was that?" Roderich asked after noticing the albino staring into his glass in what seemed like deep thought.

"Water and ice magic." He answered and took a drink of his wine. "My people are experts with it, it's a special type of magic known only to us, apparently it has some special properties, but I guess I'm a bit weak from not eating much for a week." He said and chuckled weakly.

"I see..." Roderich took a drink. "You're a Neirunian, aren't you?" he asked, and Gilbert nearly spit his drink out.

"Nei-what now?" Gilbert coughed a little from inhaling his wine.

"Neirunians, the race of Elves that live in the underground city of Neirun, former residents of Silver Mountain before the Great War. That's you right?" he asked.

"Uh..." Gilbert paused, "I, haven't heard our true name in so long... it's weird to hear it again." He said, rubbing his neck nervously.

"So you are." The Austrian nodded and smiled a little, "I can tell you don't want anyone to know about this. Don't worry, I'm rather good with secrets."

Gilbert sighed, "Thanks, I have enough problems as it is, I don't need people getting pissed at me for something I didn't do."

"That's right; you weren't alive during the Great War. The Neirunians had a great part in that war, they _did_ start it after all. Shame how the Empire drove you all underground like that; if your kind were up here for the Millennium War, they probably would have won and magic wouldn't be as shunned as it is today." Roderich said.

"You're talking about history that I don't know, so I'm just going to drink and eat and then pass your test and become an official member of your College, okay?." Gilbert said, and ripped a piece of bread in half and shoved one piece into his mouth.

"You do that, Gilbert." Roderich said simply and quietly drank as the Elf ate.

"... by the way, how did you know about my sector?" Gilbert asked, "That history has faded almost completely."

Roderich took another drink. "My father is a former officer of the Empire's army, so he had access to a lot of books, I like to read and so I read a lot about Elves. I read about the Great War and about your people. I had my suspicions about you when we were in the armory, but you've confirmed it." He said and set his empty glass back on the table. "I'm almost honored to have a Neirunian here at the College." He smiled.

Gilbert sighed and ate a strange looking fruit that was on the plate in front of him. "If you say so, we're not that special."

.

After Gilbert was full and feeling better, the two men rejoined with Elizaveta in the courtyard.

"Is he ready to meet Beatrice?" the woman asked.

"I think so." Roderich said and looked to Gilbert, "Go to the end of this stone bridge and you'll find an old woman, tell her that you wish to join the College and she'll give you your test." He said.

"All right, sounds simple enough." Gilbert said confidently and tightened the strap with his bow on it tighter on his body, he then started to walk away, but Roderich suddenly gripped his shoulder.

"Try not to panic or die." He warned.

Gilbert gave him a slightly scared look and then just continued walking.

Once the Elf was out of earshot, Elizaveta punched Roderich in the arm playfully, "You're always teasing new initiates; you know Beatrice doesn't _actually_ kill anyone."

"I know, but it's fun to see fear shine in someone's eyes when I tell them not to die." Roderich said.

Elizaveta sighed and held her temple in her hand, "You're ridiculous." She said, "Anyway, if he passes the test, where will he be staying?"

"Well, the extra room is out of the question." Roderich said and pushed his glasses up.

"What?" Elizaveta's eyes flattened and she crossed her arms over her chest.

"I may or may not be using it for personal experiments." He said nervously.

The woman groaned, "Just make sure the fumes stay _inside_ the room this time." She said, "I guess he'll have to stay with Ivan, but how's that going to work out? Ivan's pretty upset with him."

"Maybe they'll settle their past differences and learn to love each other?" he suggested jokingly.

"You're trying to get Gilbert killed, aren't you." She raised an eyebrow at Roderich and then sighed. "Well, I don't know about you but I want to watch the Elf shoot." She said.

"You go do that, I'm going to go talk to Ivan and warn him about Gilbert."

"Don't die." Elizaveta said with a chuckle and began to run toward the arch entrance of the College.

Roderich just sighed and headed back inside, honestly hoping that he wouldn't be killed.

.

Roderich knocked gently on the door to Ivan's dorm. "It's open." Came the Russian's voice from the other side and Roderich entered, shutting the door behind him.

"Good afternoon, Ivan." He greeted, "I need to talk to you about something." He said and sat in a chair in the room.

"Sure, what is it?" Ivan asked, giving the professor his full attention.

"It's about Gilbert, the Elf." He instantly noticed the look on Ivan's face change into a displeased and annoyed one. "He's going to Beatrice right now to take his test and I think he has a high chance of passing, and if he does, I'm afraid he'll have to dorm with you."

"_What?_"

Roderich instantly waved his hands in front of him when he saw some fire burning in Ivan's hand, "Calm down you pyro. If we had an extra room I would separate you two, but one room doesn't have a wall and the other is filled with poisonous fumes that'll take months to disperse."

"Shove him in the _second_ one then." Ivan spat.

"Ivan, Gilbert is just like you. The College is all he has, he doesn't have a home anymore, and he's alone and needs a family to look after him." Roderich said and sighed softly.

The Russian's face softened a little bit when he heard about Gilbert. Ivan somehow always managed to find sympathy for people, even for those he disliked.

"Ivan, what did Gilbert do to make you hate him so much?" Roderich asked calmly, hoping for an answer.

Ivan was still and quiet for a few moments more. "He nearly killed me. I suppose it was my fault because I provoked him but I didn't think he'd try to actually..." Ivan stopped and shuddered a little.

Roderich's eyes widened slightly. "I see... I'm sorry you two had your issues in the past, but I think Gilbert has changed. He's a bit cocky but he's damaged and needs us. His personality doesn't seem that of one who has the intention to kill." He said, "Just give him a second chance, all right?"

Ivan refused to look at the other. "Fine, but if he starts his old crap with me again, I won't hesitate to break his neck."

"I'm certain you won't, but you'll compromise your membership here." Roderich sighed, "Just don't provoke him either."

Roderich said nothing more and left Ivan to his thoughts.

The Russian hated the idea. He once had to bunk with Gilbert during a trip for school years ago and the albino drove him insane, but he's a different man now and Ivan's stronger than he used to be, more hardheaded and brutal even. He wouldn't let the Elf win.

.

As Roderich was walking through the hall to return to his classroom, he heard a loud roar from outside and he stopped to look out at a window toward the ceiling.

"I wonder if he's panicking yet." He said, smiling as he knew that the albino was.

.

"A _dragon!?_" Gilbert yelled as he ran behind a tree for cover. _'The test is to fight a fucking dragon?'_ he said mentally as he loaded an arrow onto his bow. The dragon flew down close and then back up, and Gilbert sprung from his hiding place and let his arrow fly. It just missed the dragon's leg and he swore to himself and ran after the dragon through the woods away from the College entrance, leaving a disappointed Elizaveta with no show to watch.

Gilbert loaded arrow after arrow and all of them came so close to hitting the dragon but none pierced its scaly hide. Soon he was down to one arrow in his quiver and he growled annoyingly, the dragon was too fast and unpredictable for his arrows and he had run dry on his supply of them, so maybe...

He put his bow back on his back and began casting a spell; his arms began to be covered with ice up to his forearms and had shiny little pointed shards of ice covering every inch of his arm, a deadly and useful spell whose ice was nearly unbreakable. He ran after the dragon, feeling his heart beating fast and whipping his hands in different directions and sending shards of ice the size of his head toward the dragon. None hit, but that was his plan. The dragon suddenly took a U-turn in the sky and Gilbert sent an ice shard directly up toward her. This time, it hit her leg as she passed over him and she roared loudly.

Still though, no blood. The dragon's hide was tough.

Gilbert grinned and used both hands to create more ice. His spell is powerful, and from the College Elizaveta could see a large blanket of shimmering ice moving through the sky. The Elf brought his hands above his head and slowly moved them down out in front of him, forcing his ice blanket to go over the dragon and curve in front of her.

Wherever the dragon turned, Gilbert would move his ice, commanding it like one of his own limbs, though he was getting weak and sweat was building up thickly on his forehead. He hadn't used this spell but once before and he rarely used his magic like this, so he was starting to lose his energy and possibly even his consciousness.

Before she knew it, Beatrice was trapped in a solid prison of ice and was forced to the ground. In all honesty, she could easily push her wings against the ice and break from her cage but she had seen enough.

Gilbert was sliding down his ice to meet her. He stopped in front of her where only her head could be seen through a small hole he left open. "Do I really have to make you bleed?" he asked, taking his dagger from its sheath into his hand.

The dragon growled lowly and moved its large head, and Gilbert simply moved his free hand, causing a skinny spike of ice to poke a little into the dragon's cheek from the inside of her prison.

Gilbert holstered his weapon and let his hand fall to his side and all the ice suddenly melted into water. The dragon when up in a cloud of black smoke and she emerged as the small old woman again.

"Interesting tactic, using ice to trap me. Flashy, but clever." She said and wiped the blood from her cheek. "You didn't have to dump me with water though." She chuckled a little and twisted a clump of fabric in her hand to wring the water out.

Gilbert looked a little embarrassed about it and he looked down shyly, and Beatrice watched him carefully. "Welcome to the College, Ice Elf."

Gilbert's eyes widened a little, "Ice Elf?" he repeated.

"Yes, that's what you are; it's what you'll be known as to me for as long as I am alive." She said, "If you don't like your name, then too bad. Go inside, rest and drink up." She said and began walking away.

Gilbert sighed and followed her, smiling a little to himself and feeling a bit proud.

.

Elizaveta greeted Gilbert at the entrance and she was smiling happily. "I saw your ice magic, that was fantastic." She said.

"Well I try." Gilbert said with a chuckle, but then coughed a few times and covered his mouth.

"Are you all right?" She asked, her excitement turning to worry.

"Yeah I'm fine. I just haven't used that much of my magic in a long time; I'm still a bit weak so it took a lot out of me." He said as he held his forehead in one hand.

Elizaveta smiled a little, "Come on, Roderich will want to hear the good news, and we need to get you set in your dorm." She said and grabbed the albino's hand and began pulling him toward the College.

Gilbert let the woman pull him, since his sense of balance and direction was a bit off right now. He could see his feet stepping in random spots, not coherently like a normal walking pace. His vision blurred with each step he took and his head felt faint.

"Dammit..." he mumbled, feeling his head become lighter. Elizaveta turned her head when she heard him. Next thing she saw was the pale man's eyes closing and him falling forward. She managed to catch him in her arms but he was a bit too heavy to hold up on her own.

She glanced around and called out for anyone for help.

.

Gilbert groaned, and he shifted his body. Soon blinking his eyes open, he saw a wooden plank above him and he felt a soft bed under him and he was covered by a blanket.

"You're really something, aren't you?" he heard a voice say. The Elf gasped a little when he realized he wasn't alone and he turned his head to look around. In a chair by a table there sat a man larger than he with a long black robe covering his body, a white scarf around his neck. "You're always so flashy and trying to show off." He commented, "It's going to get you killed one day."

Gilbert squinted his eyes a little, wondering. "You look familiar..." he mumbled toward the other, "Do I know you?"

The other man's eyes were flat and annoyed, and he stood up. His movement made Gilbert tense up out of instinct and his eyes followed the other as he walked to Gilbert's bedside and picked up a glass on the nightstand. "Get up and drink this." He said and held the glass out to the albino, waiting for him.

Gilbert blinked a few times and sat up, feeling his head become faint again. The other took notice to it, and he sighed with what Gilbert thought was annoyance, but in reality was pity.

The elf took the glass and looked at the clouded colorless liquid rippling against the sides. "What is it?" he asked.

"A drug. I kidnapped you, y'know." The other joked, feeling a small grin pull his lips up.

"What?" Gilbert questioned, looking at the other. The fear in his eyes was proof enough that he maybe thought the other was telling the truth, and the slight waver in Gilbert's voice made the other male laugh a bit.

"It's a potion from Roderich, said it'll help you get what little strength you have back." He said. "You're really gullible."

Gilbert glared, feeling a vein in his temple starting to throb along with his blood starting to boil. "You're a jackass." He said and drank the potion.

"Likewise."

"Seriously who _are_ you? You talk as if you know me." Gilbert asked.

"You really don't remember me?" he asked, "I'm Ivan Braginski, the 'fatass wannabe mage' that you enjoyed tormenting in school."

Gilbert's eyes widened a little, his memories of the other suddenly coming back to him, "Oh that's right..." he had actually felt a bit bad for forgetting, what with all he's done to him.

"I look different now, don't I? I'm not fat anymore and I can probably break your little bony ass in half." Ivan said.

"Oh you'd like that wouldn't you, _Ivan_." Gilbert retorted with heavy innuendo, returning Ivan's glare with a small smirk. Gilbert's feeling of guilt for teasing the Russian was gone; he didn't feel bad at all anymore.

There was a long moment of silent glaring, like they were both trying to pick each other apart mentally, but they were knocked out of their thoughts when the door opened and Roderich walked in.

"Hello boys, getting along are we?" he asked jokingly.

"He wants to break my ass." Gilbert said in a humorous tone, but Ivan could practically _taste_ the venom in his voice.

"Don't we all." Roderich said and Gilbert twitched back a little, looking a tad bit flustered and confused. "Anyway, drink that potion or else you'll probably die. Also, Ivan, I see you haven't killed him yet. Good job."

"It's frowned upon to kill fellow members of the College, so." Ivan replied and leaned back in his chair.

Roderich sighed, "I'm pleased that you think so highly of the College's rules. With that in mind, I'm pleased to tell you both that you'll be rooming together."

Ivan already knew that he was to dorm with the albino, though he didn't like it at all. Gilbert glared a little at Roderich, but knew that if he fought against this, he would probably get kicked out of the College.

"Anyway, I have a task for you both." Roderich said and got both of the other males' attention. "I need you two to get along. As much as you may want to lop each other's heads off, I need you to resist that urge and at least _try_ to be civil." He said, looking mostly toward Ivan, who everyone knew had a short temper and liked catching things on fire. "You two are opposites, fire and ice, so your personalities really don't mesh all that well, but maybe you could at least try, yes? That way I don't have to plan another funeral or hire builders to rebuild another room." He said and sighed in exhaustion.

Gilbert looked a bit put off by the examples Roderich gave, but Ivan sat there with a bored look on his face. He was very used to this by now and had heard several stories of Roderich's experiences here at the College.

"With that said, I'll leave you both alone." Roderich said and stood between the doorframe of their door. "Ask each other questions, get to know each other. Pretend you're on a blind date or something and you have to make the most of a terrible time." He joked with a small chuckle.

Gilbert rolled his eyes, "You'd _have_ to be blind to go out with him." He looked to Ivan with a small grin, and the Russian was _clearly_ not amused, glaring harshly at the albino.

Roderich could taste the tension in the air and he closed the door and left. '_They're going to murder each other, aren't they?_' He asked himself mentally with a sigh, and then walked down the hall.

Ivan leaned back in his chair and watched the albino drink his potion. He was trying to think of something to say that wouldn't be _completely_ offensive to the other but all he wanted to do was rip him apart with insults.

While Ivan was watching him carefully, Gilbert was feeling increasingly more uncomfortable. He didn't like when people stared at him for long periods of time, and he almost felt naked under the others intense gaze. He didn't doubt that Ivan could now physically overpower him -the Russian could probably use Gilbert as a weapon if he wanted to- and that thought brought a twinge of fear to the Elf.

"Still wearing that stupid scarf, eh?" Gilbert took a jab, not a very smart move. "It makes you look girly."

Ivan scoffed and glared at the other, "At least I don't get mistaken as one."

"Excuse me?" Gilbert groaned, looking annoyed, but moreso because Ivan's statement was very true for him.

"When Roderich found you he thought you were a girl until he took your clothes off, even Elizaveta did." The Russian smirked. "Your long hair makes you look like some ridiculous princess."

Gilbert protectively grabbed some locks of his hair; it was down and not tied back anymore and falling over his shoulders. "I have a reason for my hair being this long, jackass."

"And _I_ have a reason for wearing my scarf, _Elf_." The way Ivan said his last word caused a shiver to go through Gilbert's body and he froze still.

'_Of course... he hates Elves too._' Gilbert thought and then turned his head away from the Russian. He felt sad, hurt even. So many humans hated Elves so much and for something his stupid ancestors did 2,000 years ago. '_I had nothing to do with that war so why do I keep taking the heat for it._' he wondered.

Ivan soon noticed the silence the other had fallen into and the look on Gilbert's face made the Russian curious. "Why do you look so upset? You started this." He said.

Gilbert shifted his pink eyes toward the other, his expression looking almost pathetic and pleading. It actually took Ivan off-guard.

'_Where is that obnoxious man I knew in school?_' the Russian thought to himself, and then remembered how Roderich said that Gilbert's attitude was different from what he said. '_Even the way he looks is more... calm, and gentle. It's weird, but..._' He thought more, unknowingly that he was staring at the albino again.

"Stop looking at me like that, you're freaking me out..." Gilbert said and scooted himself closer to the wall, pulling the blanket up a little.

"Ah. Sorry." Ivan strangely apologized and began to fuss with his scarf, pushing it up a little. And then Gilbert saw something that made him go wide-eyed and surprised.

A blush. Albeit a small one, but the Russian's cheeks were lit a pale pink. It made Gilbert grin a little.

"What, are you embarrassed for looking at me?" He asked with a tone of humor in his voice.

Ivan looked at him and kept silent, not sure how to really answer the other. He wasn't embarrassed per se, just a little flustered for getting lost in thought while looking at the other. Now that he got a good look at him, Gilbert looked... otherworldly.

"Don't be so flustered, I'm used to getting weird looks." He said. His tone was still humorous but it also held some sadness in it. "Being an Elf is bad enough, right? But add the fact that I'm albino on top of that and I'm basically public enemy #1." He said and slumped down a little.

"You're albino?" Ivan asked.

Gilbert shifted his eyes toward the other, "Yeah. It makes my skin this pale and my hair and eyes colorless."

"But your eyes are red."

"_Pink_. And I don't know, I guess that's just normal. I don't understand it, and if you ask most people they'll tell you I'm a demon or a host for one."

"I could believe that." Ivan jabbed playfully.

Gilbert glared toward the Russian, "_Watch it_, I can be more of a demon than you think."

"Says the guy who fainted after using a few spells."

"I was _exhausted_." Gilbert defended himself. "Cut me some slack."

"You need to toughen yourself up if you want to stay alive here." Ivan said, "You can't be fainting like that every time you cast a few spells or else you'll be dead within the month. You're weak, and your skills need to be sharper if you-"

"_I know that!_" Gilbert suddenly yelled, gripping the blanket in his hands. "I know I'm weak and pathetic! You can stop reminding me how much of a failure I am _dad!_" he yelled and then quickly slapped a hand over his mouth. His eyebrows knitting together.

Ivan sat there, staring wide-eyed at the albino and his outburst. "Gilbert-"

"Don't talk to me." He snapped, "J-Just leave me alone. I want to sleep." He said and laid down, turning his back toward the Russian. He curled up a little and squeezed his eyes shut tight.

Ivan looked at the others back and wondered about the meaning behind Gilbert's outburst, and the fact that he called him dad also intrigued him. He was slightly annoyed that Gilbert wouldn't talk, but he just let it go.

"You can take the bottom bunk for now." Ivan said and then walked around and blew out the candles in their room. He climbed up the bunk to the top and laid down, still wondering about the male in the bed under him.

He turned over onto his side and closed his eyes, trying to not think of several reasons for why Gilbert had seemingly changed. Maybe his old personality was just under the surface? Maybe scared to be out on his own?

'_But, he wasn't like that back in school..._' Ivan thought, but soon drifted to sleep.

.

The next morning Ivan rose before Gilbert, and he carefully climbed down the stairs on the bunk bed to not wake the other. Gilbert was still sleeping peacefully, probably exhausted from yesterday. Ivan left their dorm and went to the dining room, where he found Roderich and Elizaveta eating breakfast.

"Oh, good morning Ivan." Elizaveta greeted with a smile.

"Yes good morning." Roderich said, dabbing his mouth with a cloth. "How's your fainting friend?" He asked with a small grin playing on his lips.

"Still sleeping." Ivan said and walked to the large table. "And he's not my friend."

Roderich smiled a little and folded his hands in front of him, "Ivan I'd like for you to join me again in ingredient hunting this morning. Perhaps Gilbert will feel up to joining us?" he suggested.

The Russian sighed, "The idiot probably will be weak and sore this morning, but he'll come." Ivan said, "I'll bring him some food so he doesn't fall on his face."

Elizaveta giggled softly as Ivan collected food onto a large plate. "For someone who isn't your friend, you're sure looking out for him."

Ivan stopped with a freshly baked piece of bread in his hand and thought for a moment. "The first rule of this College is that we should treat fellow College members as our brothers and sisters, isn't that right?" he said and dropped the bread on the plate. "I'm doing this because as much as that Elf annoys me, he's a member of the College; an outcast who needs a family." He said and then turned on his heels and walked out of the dining room.

There was a short moment of silence in the room, and Elizaveta took a drink of her wine and swallowed it. "Well, _he_ seems to be trying hard."

"This is good, though; the two of them could use some companionship." Roderich said, "Most likely he's bitter because he probably loved Gilbert or something and got rejected." He laughed a little.

"... you think so?" She wondered looking toward Roderich, "I'm not sure; Ivan is a nice guy so he might just be trying to patch things up with Gilbert."

"Maybe. We'll see how Gilbert reacts. Something tells me that gestures of compassion are things he's not exactly used to." Roderich said and took another drink.

.

Ivan leaned his back against the door so that he could open it, and gently nudged it closed with his foot. He set the platter of food on the nightstand by Gilbert, who was still sleeping, and he lit a few candles in the room with a small flame on his finger.

He glanced over to Gilbert after sitting down in the chair he usually sat in. He wasn't thinking, just looking, and noticed how Gilbert had grown in the last 8 years. He was taller than Ivan remembered, though the Russian still had about 2 inches on him. His face seemed more mature and no longer held that childishness that Ivan remembered, and his hair is obviously a lot longer than before. It threw him off, but long haired Gilbert seemed more... _elegant_. He _certainly_ isn't graceful, but he is an Elf, and Elves are still admired, though by few, for their beauty and skill, and Gilbert was no exception to that...maybe not on the skill part though.

'_An albino Elf... the gods really didn't like you, did they, Gilbert?_' he thought. However, he himself thought Gilbert was fairly interesting; always have, even back in school. Gilbert was the one to beat. A hardheaded and self-driven boy who wanted so desperately to be better than everyone and prove himself, for whatever reason. That determination inspired Ivan himself. In a way, Gilbert helped him become the man he is today.

However... an icy memory kept Ivan from giving any credit to Gilbert. He may be self-driven and had once motivated Ivan, but he had always mocked and teased him when they were young, he tried to sabotage him several times just so Ivan would lose, and then Gilbert almost killed him. It was sad, Gilbert had such potential to be great, but he chose to be obnoxious and win through dishonorable ways. It made Ivan's blood boil just thinking about it.

Ivan's violet eyes traveled to Gilbert's neck, studying the cross pendent that was shoved near his ear and the silver chain it was attached to. His neck was smooth, flawless, and perfect.

Ivan gently gripped his scarf around his neck. His was rough, ugly, and scarred. All because of the man sleeping so peacefully in front of him. So calm, so unaware, and so vulnerable.

He sighed heavily and slumped down in his chair and waited.

After about 10 minutes Ivan had finished eating his part of the food, and Gilbert finally began to stir awake. He turned his head and looked at Ivan, looking a bit shocked toward the other.

"Why are you up so early?" Gilbert asked as he sat up and brushed down his hair a little bit.

Ivan glared softly at the other, "Eat your food." He instructed and pushed the plate closer to the edge of the nightstand, toward Gilbert.

The Elf blinked a few times before he picked up a piece of bread. "You're awfully gracious to the people you hate." He said while tearing a smaller piece of bread off and put it in his mouth.

Ivan rolled his eyes a little, trying not to snap. "Roderich asked me to get you food." He lied and wanted to get off the subject. His eyes fell back onto the cross around Gilbert's neck. "That cross looks expensive; did you steal it from some rich noble while trying to find the College."

Gilbert froze for a moment and swallowed his food. "This pendant belonged to my brother." He said and angrily shoved another piece of bread into his mouth.

The Russian's lips twitched and threatened to pull up into a grin, it was strangely satisfying to get under the albino's skin. It brought back a lot of memories. Back then, even Ivan enjoyed getting his hands a little dirty when it came to his pale skinned rival.

Soon, Ivan stood from his chair and readjusted his white scarf around his neck, pushing the tails over his shoulders so they fell behind him. "We're going out with Roderich this morning to find ingredients, so hurry up and eat and then find us in the dining hall." He said and walked to the door, and then turned to look back at Gilbert, flashing a cocky grin, "You _do_ know where that is, right?" he asked teasingly.

Gilbert glared and jerked his hand in Ivan's direction, sending a small shard of ice toward the Russian. Ivan however dodged it easily (though Gilbert wasn't really _trying_ to hit him) and the shard of ice stuck into the door, and Ivan walked out of the room grinning, leaving Gilbert pouting and fuming to himself.

The albino shoved another piece of bread into his mouth, but then a small smile took his lips.

'_Now this... feels like home._' He thought happily. Even though Ivan was a pain, he felt happy here. He was looking forward to learning with the professors, and making Ivan's dorm life with him a living hell whenever he could.

* * *

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	4. Cloak and Dagger

**[Originally posted: 9/12/2013]**

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Use of alcohol. Mention of death. Slightly suggestive themes.**

* * *

Elizaveta walked into Roderich's study after knocking softly against the wood, "Hey," she greeted as she walked to him, bearing a yellow folder in her arms.

The man was busy writing in a small book, but he stopped, "Good morning, Elizaveta." Roderich greeted and put down his feathered pen and gave the other his attention.

The woman smiled weakly and handed the Austrian some papers that she slid out of the folder. "I need you to read these and sign them, they're... _work-related_ matters." She said with a dreadful look on her face.

Roderich took the papers quickly and scanned them, and his face dropped. Apparently some students caused a ruckus at a tavern out East and were charged a hefty fine, one that the College must pay. "Dammit, we can't pay this off..."

"Don't worry, we'll find a way. We always do." Elizaveta said, trying to be positive.

"No we can't, we don't have _this_ much. They want 2,000 coins for the damages and another 1000 to please a local nobleman who took a glass to the face." He said.

"3,000 coins..." Elizaveta sighed. "No, forget it, we'll find a way, I promise, even if we have to sell some things around the College." she said.

"I suppose... I could try to sell some potions in town..." Roderich suggested.

"Yes, and there're enough weapons to go around still."

Roderich smiled at the other, "Thank you."

"No problem." Elizaveta smiled back, "Anyway, so how are the love birds?" Elizaveta asked with a chuckle in her voice.

Roderich groaned softly and slumped down in his chair, "They're getting worse. Two days ago I caught Gilbert putting porcupine quills in Ivan's bed, and Ivan tried to boil Gilbert while he was bathing this morning." He groaned, "The two are getting ridiculous, I don't know how much longer it'll be until they actually _do_ kill each other."

"They were doing so well too. What happened to them?" the woman asked.

"Ivan accidentally put a poisonous root in one of Gilbert's potions 3 days after he arrived. It had some... unfortunate, side-effects on Gilbert's insides. After I fixed him up, Gilbert was so embarrassed for what the poison did to him that he vowed to get Ivan back, and ever since, the two have been battling back and forth."

"It's been 2 weeks, I'd hoped that this would have stopped by now..." she said and sighed, crossing her arms over her chest.

"At first it was just petty things that were harmless, but now it's getting to a serious point and I'm worried that they're going to start causing some real damage to each other." Roderich said and rubbed his temples. "Arthur came to me yesterday complaining about some strange thudding sound coming from their room, and when I asked Gilbert about it, apparently Ivan was kicking his bed from below because he was mad about the porcupine quills." He said and sighed, "They've been taking the same classes and have been stuck in their room together almost every day. It's like they're purposely trying to give the other a reason to kill the other. Maybe they need to get out and _actually_ do something together."

"Maybe." Elizaveta shrugged, "Wait... what if we send them on some jobs?" she said and Roderich looked at her, "They could take a few jobs and be gone for like a week. Maybe do some 'manly bonding' and kill some things together. It might be good for them and take the tension off of each other." She said, "Honestly, it might just be good for Ivan, you can tell when that boy gets the itch to light something on fire, and I'd rather it not be Gilbert."

"He does burn easily." Roderich laughed softly, "All right, that doesn't sound half bad. You should go talk to them and see which jobs they want to take."

"Right, I'll talk to them and hopefully they can bring in some money as well. Maybe I can get Francis and Antonio to take some jobs as well." She smiled and then left Roderich to his thoughts.

.

Gilbert and Ivan were still fast asleep in their dorm when Elizaveta came to them. She took a moment to admire the peacefulness of their room when they were both quiet, because she knew as soon as one of them woke up, they'd find a horrible way of waking the other up.

Elizaveta smiled and then held out her hands and a light green aura covered them, suddenly shapes appeared in her hands and then hardened into weapons, a sword and shield. Summoning magic that she had learned years ago, she also knew how to summon armor as well.

She waited for a moment, and then suddenly slammed the sword against her shield, creating an awful ringing sound that caused the other two to wake up instantly. One more gracefully than the other.

Ivan groaned and opened his eyes calmly, not seeming alarmed at all by the loud crashing sound, but rather just annoyed. Gilbert however, shot up from his bed and nearly slammed his face into the brick ceiling.

"What the _hell_ are you doing!?" the albino yelled down at Ivan as he looked over the edge of his bunk down at the Russian.

"It wasn't me, idiot. Elizaveta's here." Ivan groaned with a yawn and sat up.

Gilbert looked to the side and saw the woman standing there. His eyes went flat and he sighed heavily in annoyance, wondering why she couldn't have found a better, less painful way to wake them up.

"We have some jobs for you two to do." Elizaveta said with a mischievous grin and suddenly the weapons in her hands exploded silently into green shimmers and disappeared. "Get yourselves ready, eat a good breakfast and then meet me in my office." She said and then left the room.

Gilbert stared at the door for a moment, not fully awake yet. He had half a mind to challenge Elizaveta to battle after the rude awakening, but even he knew that the woman was fierce and strong; he didn't want her coming at him with a sword.

Ivan stood up from his bed and stretched, which annoyed Gilbert because he was standing right in front of him with his arms right in his face. The Russian had a habit of sleeping shirtless, and it didn't bother Gilbert other than the fact that it seemed like Ivan was trying to show off. He was well-toned and obviously a lot stronger than Gilbert.

Gilbert was annoyed by Ivan's body. He remembered trips back in school where they would have to go swimming in lakes or rivers and Ivan would always wear a shirt because he was bigger and self-conscious about his weight. Gilbert himself was fit back then because of all his training back home, but over the past 8 years of him locking himself away, he lost most of his muscle and looked even weaker than he did before. It annoyed Gilbert that Ivan had done better than him, but then again, deep down, Gilbert always knew that Ivan was the stronger one, physical means or magical.

However the most annoying was how he always wore his scarf. Gilbert had been rooming with Ivan for 2 weeks and he's never seen the Russian without the long piece of fabric wrapped around his neck, as if it was physically impossible to remove.

The albino's eyes traced the Russian's back like they usually did every morning, he practically had every little mark and scar memorized, but he never asked about them. He was curious but he didn't want to be. This was Ivan, the man that he was rivals with 8 years ago, and the man he is rivals with now.

Still though, he could feel his curiosity growing stronger, along with his irritation.

"For an ice mage, your gaze sure burns." Ivan said as he pulled a shirt from his dresser. After he spoke he turned his head toward Gilbert and grinned ever-so-slightly.

"Shut up. I was just wondering about your scars." The albino retorted and laid on his back again. He already felt embarrassed that Ivan caught him looking at him.

"Wondering for 2 weeks?" Ivan chuckled out, being aware of how Gilbert would stare at him each morning, "I think you might just have a thing for me." He teased and pulled the shirt over his head.

"You wish."

"Only in your dreams, Elf."

Gilbert twitched and felt his body grow hot with annoyance. "Stop calling me that."

Ivan looked toward Gilbert and saw the albino glaring over the top of the bunk. "That's what you are, isn't it." He asked rhetorically.

"It's the _way_ you say it, like you despise Elves. I get hating me, but don't hate me _just_ because I'm an Elf." Gilbert said.

"Oh I hate you for plenty of other reasons. Like the quills in my bed and the constant teasing back in school." Ivan said and readjusted his scarf. "I think you're just pissed off because now we're older and you see what I've become, and you can't beat me. You know I'm stronger." He said and threw his bag over his shoulder.

Gilbert's glare intensified, but he didn't speak, he couldn't find a comeback because what Ivan said was completely true and he really hated the fact that it was.

"Hurry up and get dressed. Elizaveta will be waiting for us." He said as he slid Natalia's dagger into its small sheath and then left the room, shutting the door rather harshly behind him.

Gilbert grit his teeth and felt angry, but also incredibly weak and pathetic. He hated losing, especially to someone like Ivan. The Russian used to be so shy and insecure and craved friendship, but now he was this strong and confident man that easily put Gilbert in his place every time. It's like they had switched places sometime in the last 8 years.

And the worst part was that Gilbert knew it.

The Elf eventually dragged himself out of bed. Dressing in his tight leggings and cut-off tunic again, and laced his boots up and double knotted them. He also wrapped a black cloak around his shoulders that Arthur let him have. Gilbert found out the hard way that he needed to protect himself if he was going to be out in the sun for long periods of time, so he made a habit of always wearing a cloak that opened in the front so he could easily fight or do whatever he needed to do.

He adjusted his straps for his dagger and bow around his body and attached his weapons to them, as well as a quiver of new and finely made silver arrows. He then pulled his hair back and messily tied a black ribbon tightly into his hair.

He too, left the room.

.

In the dining hall, Ivan was already fast at work eating. The Russian wasn't the only one in the hall, however. A blond boy with a weird accent that flirted with anything that moved, his name was Francis, and also the brown haired boy that was always with him, Antonio. The two were long-time friends and roommates, and favored using swords, axes and shields as their weapons, neither of them were magic users. Antonio never bothered Gilbert, but Francis would often make very uncomfortable comments toward him. Antonio always reassured Gilbert that it was just the blond's way of being friendly, but sometimes it was a bit creepy, but there was no ill intent behind his actions. He was simply very loving toward everyone. In fact, the day Gilbert met Francis, the blond kissed him on the cheek, would have been on the mouth if Gilbert didn't flinch away.

Gilbert ate by himself, like usual. So did Ivan, actually. Everyone thought it was strange since they're roommates, but everyone also began to realize that the Russian and Elf didn't get along at all, so they let them be. It was uncomfortable to be in a room with the two when they got annoyed at each other. Like mixing fire and ice, the two created a thick "steam" in the air and made it hard to breathe.

When Ivan stood up to leave the room, Gilbert couldn't help but follow him with his eyes. The albino forced his food down as well as some water and then quickly left the dining hall. His leaving caused some whispers, everyone talking about the Elf and mage.

.

Gilbert headed toward Elizaveta's office, which was on the second floor of the College. Outside the door, however, he found Ivan leaning against the wall.

"What are you doing?" Gilbert asked, his grin insinuating something.

"I was waiting for you." Ivan said and closed his eyes in annoyance. "Elizaveta said she had some jobs for us which means we're going to be put together as partners, so I have to at least try to pretend that I like you." He said and then pushed the door to Elizaveta's office open. "Come on."

Gilbert sighed but it was more of a groan, and he followed the Russian inside.

"There you are, you both took your sweet time, didn't you." Elizaveta asks rhetorically. She was sitting at her desk, looking over some papers. "We need to get right to work, all right?" she asked and the two men simply kept quiet.

"Some of your idiot colleagues decided to get drunk and make a mess of a tavern, so now the College owes a ton of money that we don't have. So, we're sending you two out on a series of jobs. You'll be gone for about a week so pack accordingly and try not to die or kill each other while you're out there."

Gilbert scoffed a little, and Elizaveta glared softly. "Is this funny to you, Gilbert?" She asked coldly.

"Uh, no ma'am." He replied ad then swallowed roughly. He glanced over to Ivan, who was wearing a small grin, pleased with how frightened Gilbert was of the woman.

"Good. We need you both to focus and really represent the College well. Also... _try_ to bond a little, okay?" She asked and then smiled. "If you two work as a team you might discover new things about each other and _not_ want to kill each other." She said. She noticed the looks on both of the males' faces; they clearly didn't like the idea of getting to know one another.

"Listen you guys. You're going to be on the road for a week, staying at inns or in a tent together when there are no inns. You'll have to work together whether you want to or not, but remember what's at stake here: If you don't do well on these jobs and help us get this money, then the College might be shut down." She said.

"We'll do our best." Ivan said, and Gilbert looked up to him. Ivan looked down at Gilbert and actually _smiled_. The smile gave Gilbert a chill, as Ivan wasn't one to smile as much as he grinned and smirked.

"Good." Elizaveta stood up and then walked to the two men and handed Ivan a slip of paper. "These are the towns and jobs you need to go to. Good luck."

Ivan nodded and he suddenly put a hand on Gilbert's shoulder, which made the albino twitch but his grip was tight. "Let's go pack, _partner_." He said and actually dragged Gilbert out of the room.

.

"Hey- hey Ivan! Stop pulling me, I can walk on my own!" Gilbert yelled and tried to stop, but Ivan just continued walking. Soon he gave up and just let Ivan drag him by the sleeve of his cloak until they were back in their dorm.

"That was uncalled for." Gilbert said and fussed with his cloak.

"Yeah well so was everything you've ever done to me, so get over it." Ivan snapped and pulled out a bag and quickly began packing.

The albino sighed with annoyance and did the same as Ivan, packing clothing and healing supplies for their week-long trip that he was dreading.

Ivan slowly stopped packing after a few moments and he turned his head a little to watch as Gilbert packed. He tried not to think, but the silence was starting to kill him.

"... so Gilbert, why did you come back?" he suddenly asked.

"What?" Gilbert blinked and then turned his head to look at Ivan as he was sliding a dagger into his bag.

"You disappeared for 8 years and then you suddenly wash up on the bank of a lake looking for the College." He said, "It's a bit weird."

Gilbert looked down at his bag and took a long sigh. "I had nowhere to go, and I was wandering around and I heard about the College, so I came here for the chance to increase my skills." He said.

"Don't you have a family?" Ivan asked.

"I do, but..." he stopped and didn't know how to continue, but he noticed the look on Ivan's face and it was almost sympathetic. "I don't get along with my father. He's uh... not an Elf, so..." He went with the first lie he could think of.

Ivan turned his body fully to look at Gilbert. "Dad doesn't like his half-Elf son, I take it?" he implied.

"Not in the least." Gilbert mumbled, "I don't want to talk about it, it's just a pain and doesn't matter anymore anyway."

.

Ivan stopped talking after that, though he was curious, and he wasn't sure if that curiosity was because he actually cared or if he just wanted something to possibly hurt the Elf with later. However, Roderich told him to try to get along with Gilbert and that the albino was just hurt and had gone through a lot in the past years, but that didn't change how much of an ass Gilbert was to him in school. He had every right to get revenge on him.

... right?

"This is your first time, isn't it?" Ivan asked suddenly, and Gilbert turned to him with a strange look on his face. The Russian's words confused him and somehow brought an even stranger thought to his mind. Ivan sighed, "Your first time leaving the College, idiot." He said.

"Oh, right, right yeah it is." Gilbert answered quickly.

Ivan's lips instantly pulled up into a grin. The air in the room had some sort of tension, and for Gilbert, it was really uncomfortable.

"So Gilbert, do you have a girl waiting for you back-"

"Don't even start with me. _Don't_." Gilbert interrupted and glared at the Russian male. "We're not even out of the College yet; I think we should at least try to make it off College grounds before you give me a reason to punch you."

Gilbert quickly packed the last of his things and headed out of the room angrily, letting the door swing shut behind him and slam loudly. Ivan stood there, and sighed, and looked sadly toward the dagger that Natalia gave him.

'_I haven't seen them in over 4 months... have I become so different from who I used to be?_' he asked himself, gripping the hilt of the dagger. He had realized recently that he wasn't thinking of his sisters anymore, when he used to think about visiting them every day during the first few months he was here, but now, all he seemed to care about was his jobs and his classes, and getting stronger.

To his sisters, he was always sweet and kind, but to others he was cold and almost heartless. However, they brought that on themselves.

.

Gilbert was going to wait for Ivan outside, but he decided to just slump against the wall and fall to the floor in the main hall and sulk for a bit. He was already tired and wanting to leave the trip and it hadn't even started. He couldn't survive a week with a man that clearly hated him. Gilbert wasn't even sure why he hated him so much. He knew that he teased him back in school, but Ivan made fun of the albino's coloring and ears several times back then as well. The two were always at ends so what was it that made Ivan's hate so much stronger...

"Hey, Gilbert!" A voice called out and the albino looked up after hearing several footsteps coming toward him. He looked up and saw the blond and burnet from before in the dining hall. The blond had a long shiny sword hanging off his side, as well as some brilliantly made and bright blue robes. The burnet was more dialed down with some dark red and brown clothing fit for a warrior, which he was judging by the double-bladed axe attached to his back. Gilbert felt a bit jealous looking at them. They look so... professional and like they had a lot of experience. And he was just sitting there with his bow at his side. He probably looked like a little faerie compared to them.

"Francis, and... Antonio, right?" Gilbert asked, looking to each of them for approval.

"That is correct, my friend." The blond chirped and bowed his head a little.

"We just received a job from Ms. Héderváry, so we're taking off." Antonio said and smiled happily.

Gilbert let out an exhausted chuckle, "I wish I could be more excited for my first job."

Francis blinked a few times, "Why aren't you?"

"I have to spend a week straight with Ivan, which is bad enough, but if you add the strain of stress and think of everything that could happen... I'm just dreading it, all right." He said and looked down at the stone floor.

Antonio sighed and removed his axe from his back, leaning it against the wall and then sat down next to the albino. "Oh you shouldn't think of it that way, Gilbert." He said with a smile, and Gilbert gave him a confused look. "You and Ivan clearly have some issues, but maybe being out on the road together and putting your life in the other's hands will bring out something new in each other that you can learn to appreciate."

Gilbert somehow found enough hope from the burnets words to smile just a little, "You're so optimistic."

"That's Antonio for you. He was poisoned a few months ago and even when his throat was swollen shut, he was still beaming." Francis said with a grin.

"And _whose_ fault was it that I was poisoned?" Antonio asked and stood up. He playfully punched Francis in the arm. The two began to roughhouse a little with Antonio taking the blond into a headlock and giving him a noogie, and Gilbert smiled more. He liked the friendship between these two, and he actually wished he could have that was someone. He used to act like that with his brother, before Ludwig became king, that is.

"Say Gilbert, once we're all back at the College and not dead, what do you say Antonio and I take you out for drinks?" Francis asked, giving Gilbert a warm smile.

The albino had to process the request, as he was never invited anywhere before. "Sure, that'd be awesome." He said, smiling with the other two.

"Splendid." The blond said happily.

"We better get going though, if we want to make it to the inn before nightfall." Antonio said.

"You're right." Francis said with an agreeing nod toward his partner. "We'll see you when you and Ivan get back, all right Gilbert?"

Gilbert nodded and smiled, "Yeah, good luck."

The two nodded and then headed out of the front door of the College after Antonio attached his axe to his back again.

After letting the newfound silence sink in for a few seconds, Gilbert sighed and looked to his bow, after a moment he took it into his hand and looked intensely at the markings and carvings on it. The blue streams were fading and there were scratches all over the weapon. He pressed his forehead into one of the curves and closed his eyes.

"I'm sorry mother." He whispered softly to the bow and then gave it a gentle kiss.

"Should I give you and the bow some privacy?" a voice suddenly caught Gilbert off guard and he looked up quickly. Ivan was standing there in a different outfit, a black robe that came down to his thighs and black pants that were stuffed into his knee-hi brown boots. He also had a sword at his side, and a small wooden stick hanging from a leather strap on his other side.

"Though I have to say, that might hurt." The Russian joked a little, grinning down at the albino.

"Shut up." Gilbert retorted and stood to his feet, but Ivan still looked pleased. "Why are you so happy?" he asked.

"I'm going on a job, which means I get to ride my horse to a little town and then kill something." Ivan said as if the concept was the simplest thing ever.

"Sorry to tell you this, but you _might_ be a little crazy." Gilbert said with flattened eyes.

"At least I'm not in love with a bow."

Gilbert felt his eye twitch and his hand tightened around the grip of his bow. "This bow was my mother's." he said, looking straight into the Russian's eyes.

Ivan saw the honesty in Gilbert's eyes, and he knew that something had happened to the albino's mother. He knew better than to make more jokes, as he felt a twinge of sadness as well, for he had lost both his parents years ago.

"I am sorry." Ivan said suddenly, and it caught Gilbert off guard. The Russian didn't give the other time to react. "We should get going; we still have to get you a horse from the stable." He said and pushed the front door open and walked out.

Gilbert followed quickly behind the other as he reattached his bow to its weapon strap. "A horse? Really?" his eyes widening as he lifted his cloak's hood over his head so it shaded most of his face.

Ivan turned his head to look back at the albino and noticed how he seemed to have some excitement shining in his eyes. "Yeah? Have you never ridden a horse before?" he asked.

"Once, you should remember how well that went." Gilbert said and pouted annoyingly at the memory.

It took a moment for the memory to click in Ivan's head and he suddenly laughed a little, "Oh that's right, we had to ride horses back in school for trips and none of the horses liked you and you kept falling off, you had to share a horse with the professor." He said and smiled more. "Well this time you'll have to learn, whether the horse likes you or not."

Gilbert glared at the back of Ivan's head, but he continued to follow the other to the stables.

.

There were 5 different horses at the stable, all fast and strong. Ivan would never tell anyone but secretly he would come out here and feed and pet them, giving some extra love to his own horse, Riverwind.

"All right Gilbert, pick out a horse. Or maybe I should let the horse pick you." He joked, and Gilbert glared again at the Russian and then walked toward the horses. They brayed and shifted their feet nervously.

"Be careful." Ivan warned.

Gilbert swallowed roughly, feeling intimidated by the creatures in front of him. They were huge, a lot bigger than he remembered them being. There was so much that he had forgotten about the surface world, like rain and heavy winds, and seeing it all again after 8 years was a strange feeling.

He held his hand out to one of the horses, and another one came up to him and sniffed as well. Both horses snorted and turned away. The rejection hurt the albino and the feeling shown on his face. Ivan actually felt a bit bad, for some reason being rejected by animals was nearly the worse feeling ever.

Another horse, a sleek and shiny black with dark brown eyes, seemed wary of Gilbert, who was standing there with his hand extended toward it, Gilbert was determined and he really wanted to make a new friend today, and Ivan was standing by leaning on a poll of the stable and watching Gilbert, and noticed how much the albino wanted to make one of the horses like him.

The horse slowly walked to Gilbert and stopped a few inches from his hand and slowly craned its head toward his palm. It sniffed him and snorted softly, but then walked closer so that Gilbert's hand pressed into the flat of the horse's head. Gilbert's eyes widened at that moment and he could have sworn that his heart swelled a little. The horse nuzzled against him and Gilbert slowly and softly began to pet the creature.

"Looks like I've picked my horse." Gilbert said with a bright smile toward Ivan.

A small smile tugged at Ivan's lips, threatening to make him seem like he enjoyed this sweet moment, which he did. "No, she chose you, Gilbert, which is far more important." The Russian said and walked to the albino and his new friend. He petted the top of the horses head and then looked toward Gilbert, whose face was just alight with happiness and what seemed like some pride too. Ivan watched him for a moment, '_This Gilbert is different than the one I knew years ago... this one isn't as obnoxious._' He thought, and then coughed.

"Do you have a name for her?" Ivan asked.

Gilbert looked up toward Ivan with a blank and confused look. "A name...?" he repeated and looked back to his horse, and began thinking of a name. He stayed silent for a few moments before he looked back to Ivan, "What's your horse's name?"

Ivan smiled softly and then walked into the stable, grabbing the reins of a brown horse and leading her out. "This is Riverwind; sometimes I just call her River." He said and patted the horse's side. She neighed and nuzzled against the Russian's head lovingly.

Gilbert actually smiled a little and then looked back to his horse. "Enea." He said, "Her name is Enea."

Ivan nodded and then walked closer to Gilbert, "Well then, let's see how you ride." He said and then began attaching his own bags to Riverwind's saddle, Gilbert did the same, though he fumbled a bit and wasn't sure how to really do it. Ivan sighed and went to the albino and un-did the messily attached straps.

"You're hopeless..." the Russian mumbled, which made Gilbert push Ivan in the arm. The push barely moved him, and he froze still, when he looked back to the Elf, he noticed a somewhat playful grin on his face.

Ivan sighed again after he finished pulling the straps tight on the saddle. "All right, I'll help you mount her." He said and held his hand out to Gilbert.

The albino, however, refused that offer and simply slid passed the Russian and gripped the reins of his horse. Ivan's eyes dropped and he just let Gilbert do what he wanted and began walking back to his horse. Before he could make it back to said creature, he heard a loud thud and a groan of pain from behind him. He turned his head and saw Gilbert on the ground.

The albino quickly stood up and brushed the dust and dirt from his clothes and he huffed annoyingly.

Ivan shook his head in disbelief and went to the Elf again. "You've never ridden a horse by yourself and you think you know everything. Let me help you." Ivan said.

"Put your left foot in here and hold onto the saddle." The Russian said, nudging the stirrup of the saddle with his foot. Gilbert nodded and followed Ivan's instructions, sliding his foot into the loop. He lost his balance a little but Ivan actually held the albino's shoulder to keep him up, which made Gilbert a little uncomfortable but it was better than falling on his ass again. "Now, push your weight into that and pull yourself up, and lift your other leg over the horses back." Gilbert placed his hands on the saddle, gripping at whatever he could and then did as Ivan said and pushed himself up. He panicked a little when the stirrup moved with his weight, but Ivan was there, actually helping him by holding onto his side and even pushing him up a little. Strangely, the fact that Ivan had his hands on him bothered neither of them, probably because Ivan was helping him and Gilbert was solely focused on mounting his horse. He lifted his right leg over Enea's back and sat himself on his saddle. The horse shifted from side to side and Gilbert held on tight.

Ivan took a step back and looked up at the albino, who looked a bit scared way up there. "She can probably feel your fear, y'know." He said.

"Sorry, I'm used to being below ground, not _above_ it." he said in a half-mumble, not fully realizing what he had said.

"What?" Ivan questioned and gave the other a strange look.

"Nothing, forget it." He said quickly and turned his head. "I want to learn how to ride, come on."

Ivan sighed and decided to drop the strange comment from Gilbert and he went up to Enea and grabbed her reins. "I'm going to lead her around so you can get the feel for riding first, and then I'll get on my horse and we'll ride a little faster, all right?"

"All right." Gilbert nodded.

Ivan gently tugged at Enea's reins and she walked forward. He began to lead her around, and whistled for his own horse, which came trotting passed Gilbert and walked around the others, staying near her owner.

Ivan smiled softly and continued walking with Enea. "You seem fine enough, are you scared of being up there anymore?" he asked, and Gilbert shook his head. "All right, let's take it a step further." He said and then called Riverwind to his side. She came instantly and he skillfully mounted her so that he was now eye-level with Gilbert. Ivan moved with his horse right next to Gilbert and handed him his reins. "Let's see if you can ride on your own."

Gilbert took the reins and although he was excited, he also felt a bit nervous. After remembering how he failed at riding a horse years ago, he kind of had a small fear of horses, even though he thought they were beautiful creatures.

Ivan looked at Gilbert with a smile, which was a bit strange for him, and Gilbert thought so as well. "Take the reins into both hands and gently give your horse's sides a tap with your feet, like this." He said and then demonstrated what he said, and his horse began to walk forward. He pulled on one rein to make the horse turn back to Gilbert. "Be gentle with her, you don't want to spook her." Ivan said as he circled around the albino.

Gilbert nervously gave Enea a soft tap with his feet, but she did nothing but snort quietly, so he looked back to Ivan for help.

The Russian sighed, "You're too nervous, loosen up a bit and try again." He said.

Gilbert nodded and held the reins tightly in his hands and took a deep breath. Instantly Enea felt more relaxed under him as well, and so he gave her another soft kick and this time she began walking. However Gilbert tensed back up as she started moving.

Ivan whipped his own reins lightly and moved his horse to walk next to Gilbert, "You have to relax. Animals can sense your fear or uncertainty, all you're doing is upsetting her." He said, "Try steering her to follow me." Ivan instructed and galloped a few feet in front of Enea.

The Russian steered his horse toward the long stone bridge and Gilbert, still nervous but trying, followed him on his own horse. Luckily Enea seemed to just follow Riverwind on her own.

Once they were at the entrance of the bridge, Ivan brought his horse to a stop, and Gilbert mimicked how Ivan pulled gently on his reins, and he got Enea to stop as well.

Ivan turned his head to look back to make sure that Gilbert was still behind him and he smiled when he saw Gilbert and Enea right there. "Good, you're getting the hang of this already." He said and Gilbert just gave a crooked smile, not really agreeing with the other but appreciating the enthusiasm. "The first town is too far to make by nightfall, so we'll stop at the inn a few hours east of here, all right?"

"Whatever, I'm just following you." Gilbert said flatly.

"Right." Ivan sighed and gave another gentle kick to Riverwind's side and began moving down the bridge.

Gilbert did the same and followed. He had a bit of difficulty steering Enea down the bridge, but after a minute he got the hang of it and actually managed to relax. Enea already seemed to be used to Gilbert and that thought made him calm down a little. During the ride down the bridge, Gilbert got a chance to admire his new horse. She was such a shiny and deep black that the sun glistened off of her, and even the way she walked was elegant, but she felt strong and sturdy. He really liked her and couldn't wait to fully run with her.

Soon both men reached the end of the bridge and Ivan began moving toward the dirt path leading to the road.

"Good luck, don't die." A voice spoke from behind them and both of them turned their heads to see Beatrice standing against the stone arc with a creepy grin on her face; she didn't say anything else and just turned to go inside a small room in the arc.

The woman gave Gilbert the creeps, but Ivan just continued riding down the dirt path that led to the College. Gilbert of course followed behind but he took a long moment and admired his surroundings. He hadn't seen this part of the forest since this was his first time leaving the College, and he mostly traveled in the evening or at night. He guessed that was why he ended up washed up on the lake shore a few weeks ago.

Soon Ivan reached the main road and waited for Gilbert and Enea to catch up, and when they did, Ivan held his hand out to Enea and let her sniff him. He made Riverwind walk forward but still kept his hand by Enea, who began to follow Riverwind without any instruction from Gilbert.

"What are you doing?" Gilbert asked, finally voicing his curiosity.

"You're still new at this so I'll have Enea just follow me." He said. "Luckily our horses bonded over the months and so they will all follow each other."

Gilbert leaned back a little and sighed, just letting Enea follow the others. After a minute he heard Ivan yell, not loudly, but it caused the horses to start moving faster. Gilbert panicked slightly but he held on, and Ivan just kept going, but Enea was slowing down for some reason.

"Oh come on Enea, follow them." He said. When Enea didn't do anything, he gave her a gentle kick and she snorted and began walking. "_Come on_..." Gilbert growled quietly as he looked down the road toward Ivan, who was getting farther and farther away. He gave a soft whip to the reins in an attempt to get her to run, and she did. Taking off like an arrow from a tightly strung bow. Gilbert felt his heart thud in his chest but he held on and tensed himself so he wouldn't fall.

Ivan heard a lot of clicking from behind him and he looked, and saw Gilbert and Enea galloping toward him fast. His eyes widened but he stayed still and as Gilbert neared him, he slowed down to a halt.

The albino breathed out, obviously a bit shaken up but also seemed to have a bit of an adrenaline rush.

"What are you doing?" Ivan asked.

"You were leaving without me so I caught up." Gilbert answered. "So much for the horses following each other."

Ivan stared at Gilbert for a moment and then sighed irritatingly. "Just follow me, and keep up." He said, and began riding down the road again. Gilbert glared at the Russian but did as he was told and followed him.

.

Gilbert loved this feeling, running free like this. He had never experienced anything like this before since they didn't have horses down under, just something about it made him feel like he could do anything, which was silly because all he was doing was riding a horse, which was a normal thing on the surface, and probably not even as fast as he could ride her either. The only thing that was bothering him was that pain in his ass. Ivan had warned him about it and he did remember it, but he didn't remember it hurting so much. Even his inner thighs were hurting.

Regardless, leaving home was starting to finally feel like a good idea. Up until now it had been all nearly dying in the forest and fighting with the Russian riding next to him.

Speaking of the Russian... Gilbert noticed how different he was acting today. More... kind. How he helped him attach his bags to his horse, how he helped him up onto his horse, and how he helped teach him to ride.

'_Maybe he isn't all bad._' The albino thought as he glanced over to the Russian that was filling his thoughts. Ivan seemed entranced in his riding, and Gilbert noticed how the Russian's hands were placed on Riverwind's neck and how he was leaning down a little. He seemed so lost in his own world, just with his horse. Gilbert admired him for being able to escape reality so easily; it was something he himself had wanted to do for years but never could.

Gilbert suddenly got an idea and he sped his horse up a little and brought it closer to Ivan, "Hey! How about we race!?" He yelled over the sound of the horses hooves hitting the stone road.

Ivan glanced over at him with slightly widened eyes. "You're still new at riding, don't get ahead of yourself." He said and then grinned a little, "Besides, you're just setting yourself up to lose."

Gilbert glared softly, "We won't know unless we try."

"No." Ivan said sternly, "Your horse isn't used to running; don't strain her too much on the first day." He said.

Gilbert backed off and looked down at Enea, who seemed content, but the ride probably was taking a toll on her, just like it was taking a toll on Gilbert's behind. He even tried to stand up a little so the saddle wasn't pressing into him, which just made his riding sloppy. Eventually he just sat down and dealt with the sore pain, it couldn't be worse than anything he suffered so far anyway.

.

After another hour of riding with the only sound being from the horses' hooves on stone, Ivan began to slow his horse. Gilbert followed suit but wore a curious look, watching Ivan. The Russian slid off of his horse and turned to the Elf.

"We'll let the horses rest for a while. Besides, I'm sure you could use a break too." He said with a small grin.

The albino narrowed his eyes a little and he growled under his breath as he turned his head away in irritation. He knew exactly what Ivan was referring to, and honestly he _could_ use a break.

Gilbert slid his body off of his horse as well and groaned a little at the pain he felt in his lower back. "Damn... my ass hurts now." He complained to himself,

Ivan was digging through one of his bags, and even though Gilbert couldn't see it, Ivan grinned to himself as he pulled a water canteen out of his bag and turned around. He leaned against his horse's side gently and let his grin show a little, "Maybe Enea will be the one to break your ass instead of me." He said teasingly, glancing toward Gilbert.

"Oh shut up." Gilbert groaned and crossed his arms.

The two fell into silence for a while, drinking some water that they brought with them. Soon though, Ivan's mind was occupied with a thought, something that Gilbert had said a while ago.

"_I'm used to being below ground, not above it."_

'_What does that mean...?_' Ivan wondered as he took a drink of his water.

"Gilbert." Ivan said the albino's name to get his attention and the man looked up at him.

"What?" Gilbert answered, a bit taken aback by the look Ivan was giving him.

"You said something earlier... that you're used to being below ground, not above it." Gilbert's eyes widened when he heard Ivan speak and he felt a knot tie in his stomach. "I can't figure out what-"

"It's _none_ of your business!" Gilbert growled out loudly, his voice defensive. "Stop trying to get to know me and be all buddy-buddy with me, I'm _not_ your friend." He finished. The sentence actually pained him to say. He didn't hate Ivan, certainly didn't like him either, but he hated being so bluntly rude to someone who was just making friendly conversation. However, this _wasn't_ friendly; Gilbert did not want to talk to anyone about where he's from, _especially_ not Ivan. It was bad enough that Roderich knew his exact origins; he did not need the guy who hates him knowing about it too.

However, Ivan was hurt as well. It showed physically with the raising of his eyebrows, the widening of his eyes, the way he shifted his body a little too. He was just trying to get the other to open up a little more since they roomed together but never really spoke; only fought.

Soon though, that sadness turned into annoyance and he shoved his canteen back into his bag. He made sure his bags were secure and then mounted his horse. "Get back on your horse, we're going." He said.

"What? I thought we were taking a-"

"Yeah we were, but now we're not. I only stopped because I figured you could use a break since you're new at riding, but I suddenly find myself not having any sympathy for you, so get on your horse." Ivan said without mercy, his purple eyes never breaking his cold stare with Gilbert's widened pink ones. With a soft yell and a whip of his reins, Ivan's horse began to move down the path without the other.

Now it was Gilbert's turn to feel hurt, and guilty too. He thought Ivan only stopped for the horses, but... '_Why would he care?_' he wondered. He took a moment and just watched Ivan move away. He stiffened his jaw tightly and threw his canteen into his bag and mounted his horse. He gave Enea a gentle tap to her side and she began moving.

.

Gilbert didn't catch up to Ivan; in fact the two were about 50 meters away from each other. Gilbert hung back, feeling ashamed for snapping at Ivan, and the entire time he spent thinking '_How can I apologize?_'

It was getting ridiculous. He spent nearly two hours thinking and it was driving him insane. '_I shouldn't feel this bad, right? He's tough, he'll get over it..._' he thought, '_but still... that look he got when I snapped at him..._' he remembered how shocked Ivan looked, how _hurt_.

The sun was going down now and the sunset was flickering beautifully through blackened trees. He kept his gaze in front of him, toward Ivan's back. The Russian looked like a black speck in the distance, his horse walking at a slow pace. He guessed that Ivan wanted to drag out the trip there so he could just sleep as soon as they got to the inn instead of talking to Gilbert.

The Elf just sighed and kept on riding.

In the distance, Gilbert could see an inn lit by a few lanterns and he could see Ivan pull his horse into the fenced in area. Without thinking much, Gilbert pulled on the reins of his horse and made Enea stop and he slid off of her. Grabbing hold of the reins, he started walking side-by-side with his horse. He too wanted to drag out the trip.

.

Ivan pushed the door of the inn open and walked inside. He went down the small set of stairs and saw the familiar proprietor and he was about to say hello when suddenly someone shouted his name. The Russian blinked and he looked in the direction of the voice and he saw another familiar face, the red-eyed vampire known as Vincent.

"I thought I smelled you!" the man beamed happily and patted the ash-blond's shoulders rather roughly, probably not realizing how strange his comment sounded. "How are you, my dear friend!?" He asked energetically.

"Ivan?" the man at the counter asked before the Russian could reply to Vincent, looking to his vampire friend, "Ivan! Well hey, it's nice to see you again!" he laughed. "Come on in, sit down, I'll get you a drink!"

"Thank you." Ivan said with a small smile and walked in, Vincent leading him in with an arm around his shoulder.

"So, what brings you back this way, friend?" the proprietor asked. "On a job for the College?" he slid a glass of ale toward the Russian.

"Yeah. I need a room for two for the night as well." Ivan said and took a drink.

"No problem, stay as long as you wish. Wait. Did you say a room for _two_?" the man asked.

"I did."

"Hah, have yourself a friend, do you?"

"My partner, from the College. He should be here shortly, unless he got lost." Ivan answered.

"Right right, I see." The man said and picked up another glass, "Say, it may not be any of my business but you don't seem too fond of this guy."

Ivan shrugged, "We go back about 10 years, that's when I met him anyway. I haven't seen him in 8 years and he wasn't very nice to me back then, but now he's kind of whiny and weak, and annoying." He complained.

"I'm sure he has his reasons, maybe you should try to get him to open up?"

"I _did_, but he shot me down and told me that it was none of my business." He took another drink.

Vincent sat next to Ivan at that moment, "Mmm, sounds like your friend has a chip on his shoulder. No one says 'it's none of your business' to another without having a good reason." The vampire said, "Let me guess, he's quiet until provoked, easily triggered by things, doesn't explain his outbursts, and acts a bit paranoid?"

"Pretty much, how did you know?" Ivan asked.

"I've been around for a long time, Ivan. I know things."

Ivan gave Vincent a long stare and began to think, but his thoughts were interrupted when the bell by the door rang, indicating that someone had entered the inn.

"_Elf_." Vincent mumbled just enough for Ivan to hear and suddenly he stood up to go greet him. Ivan was a little worried that Vincent was going to do something, but he wasn't sure what that was.

Gilbert had closed the door behind him, shutting it quietly. He turned around and actually let out an audible gasp when he saw the red-eyed man standing there with a very creepy smile on his lips.

"H-Hello." Gilbert stuttered out.

"Good evening." An unexpectedly soft voice came from the man. "Your Russian friend is here, come on in."

Gilbert stiffened at the mention of Ivan but followed the strange man down to the bar area.

"Ah, so this is your partner. A rather pale fellow, isn't he?" the proprietor said, and Gilbert just blinked at him, he felt uncomfortable, especially since the red-eyed man was giving him a burning stare.

"Take a seat, Gilbert." Ivan said, patting the stool next to him, and Gilbert did so. He was more concerned about how Vincent was looking at him rather than how Ivan seemed to be acting a bit nicer now.

After sitting, Gilbert gripped the hem of his hood and pulled it down, and suddenly the proprietor gasped.

"An Elf..." he said and then shifted his eyes toward Vincent. "So _that's_ why he's acting weird."

"What? Another human hating Elves?" Gilbert asked like he expected this.

"No... Vincent is a vampire, and well..." he stopped and looked to said vampire, who was biting his lip hard enough to cause blood to trickle down his chin, his smoldering gaze not leaving Gilbert, but trailing up and down his body.

"What is it?" Ivan asked curious.

"He's getting horny."

"_What_?" Gilbert suddenly asked with a tiny shriek in his voice, partly from being in the presence of a vampire.

"Apparently Elves smell really good. Their blood anyway. According to the stories Vincent has told me, if a vampire drinks the blood of an Elf they gain power."

"Even moreso if the Elf is immortal." Vincent said and Gilbert flinched when he felt his ponytail being played with by the vampire.

"Control yourself, Vincent."

"But he smells so _sweet_..." the vampire then actually pouted and then walked behind the counter. "Doesn't look half bad too." He grinned a little toward Gilbert, whose face flushed a light pink.

"D-Do we have a room yet because I'd very much like to go stay in it." Gilbert said quickly to Ivan.

"Upstairs, last door on the right." The proprietor said, and Gilbert wasted no time in getting up and quickly going upstairs, the vampire watching him walk away like a hawk.

"A bit jumpy, isn't he?" Vincent asked with a chuckle, sitting on a stool behind the counter. "How _cute_."

Ivan sighed, "I can't blame him for acting like that, you're being creepy."

Vincent sighed halfheartedly, "Sorry, it's in my nature. Elves are beautiful, and he _is_ beautiful. Such pretty white skin, I bet it looks even better with blood running down it. He smells delicious too." Vincent trailed off, obviously daydreaming about some unspeakable acts with the albino.

The talking actually made Ivan a bit uncomfortable since he's never even thought about Gilbert in any way other than an annoying Elf who once tried to kill him. He cleared his throat and stood up. "I'm going to bed. Keep him out of our room." He said, pointing toward Vincent.

The vampire whined a little, clearly disappointed.

"I mean it, we have a job tomorrow and I'd rather him be alive."

"Oh I wouldn't kill him, I'd just take him and-"

"I don't want to hear it. Goodnight." Ivan said and quickly left.

The proprietor gave a glance to Vincent and then sighed, "Go drink some ale before you get out of control." He said to him. Vincent just gave a soft glare.

.

Ivan opened the door of the room that he rented, and when he did, he saw Gilbert sitting on one of the two beds in the room with a dagger in his hands pointed at the door, his white hair free of its ribbon and hanging down over his shoulders. As soon as Gilbert saw the Russian, he sighed and lowered his knife.

"Thank the gods, it's only you." He said in relief.

"Yeah, just me." Ivan said, closing the door behind himself and locking it. "I told the owner to keep an eye on his vampire friend, so hopefully you won't be dead in the morning."

Gilbert groaned and set his knife on the table between the two beds. "I hated the way he was looking at me." He said, shivering slightly, '_It reminds me of when I was back home..._' he finished mentally.

"Kind of creeped me out too. We'll be out of here in the morning, so don't worry." Ivan said and then unbuttoned his robe and slid it off, revealing his undershirt and trousers, he unlaced his boots and kicked them off carelessly. He sat on his bed for a moment and then laid down.

Gilbert glanced over to the Russian, words dancing on his tongue. "Uh, hey... I... I want to apologize." He started, and then looked away quickly when Ivan looked over to him. He wasn't good at these types of apologies. "I didn't mean to snap at you earlier, it's just... you were touching a subject that's sensitive with me, and I didn't want to talk about it." he said.

Ivan just watched him, blinking slowly. He thought about what Vincent had said before he got weird, about how Gilbert probably has a reason for his behavior, and Ivan started to think more, about how Gilbert acted years ago, he was so proud and confident, openly challenging anyone who he thought threatened his title of being the best, even more annoying than he is now. Something must have happened in the last 8 years to reduce him to this shy, insecure and almost scared man. He was almost a complete opposite of his past self.

Ivan wanted to know, badly, and he didn't know why.

"Anyway..." Gilbert said, rubbing his neck awkwardly, "Sorry for getting mad earlier, and uh... thanks for letting me take a break from riding too." God, this was _killing_ his ego, he hated looking so weak, even if he was.

Ivan's eyes widened a little bit, noticing the albino's body language. He had brought his knees up to his chest and rested his arms on them, lowering his face. Ivan could have sworn that he saw a tint of pink on his cheeks as well, but that was just from embarrassment of apologizing like that. However... Ivan suddenly found himself studying the other. He was wearing a sleeveless shirt, and he noticed a small scar going over the curve of Gilbert's left shoulder. His hair was also falling down in front of his face. It was hard to describe him, and Ivan cursed himself when he thought the same as Vincent.

Gilbert _wasn't_ half bad to look at, only a fool would deny that he was. So maybe Ivan was a fool.

"Ivan?" Gilbert asked after a while of hearing nothing.

"Right, sorry. No it's fine; I shouldn't be prying into your life anyway." He said and sighed, closing his eyes. '_He's so annoying..._' he thought to himself.

The Elf watched the Russian curiously, noticing the strangeness of his tone and words. "Well... ask me about something else, then. Roderich did say we should try to learn about each other. Better late than never." He shrugged.

Ivan opened his eyes, "You pick a topic."

"All right... what about siblings, do you have any?" He asked.

Ivan thought it was a weird choice to start with. "I have two sisters. One older and one younger."

"Oh? Are they staying with your parents?" the Elf asked.

Ivan shifted uncomfortably. "My parents are dead; my sisters get by on their own." He said, "What about you?"

Gilbert sighed silently, "My parents are dead too." He said and buried his face into his arms. "I have a brother, but we're not that close; he's been too busy with, work." His words came out in a mumble.

Ivan's eyes narrowed, "I'm sorry." He apologized to show empathy and kept silent for a moment. "Wait... I thought you said your father hated you?" he asked.

"I never said he was alive." Gilbert answered, sadness lacing his voice. Gilbert felt another knot in his stomach, he was losing track of his lies. How many had he already told about himself? He felt terrible.

"Hey Gilbert, I uh..." Ivan started, but when Gilbert looked over at him with those pretty pink eyes under fine white hair, he suddenly lost his will to say what he was going to. "We have a big day tomorrow, so get some sleep." He said and turned over so his back was facing the albino, pulling his blanket up around himself.

Gilbert's eyes narrowed with a mix of sadness and disappointment, having wanted to hear what Ivan was going to say. '_Yeah... goodnight._' He sighed softly and laid down. Trying to ignore the nagging feeling in the back of his mind.

* * *

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	5. The Spark

**[Originally posted: 9/20/2013]**

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Violence. Blood. Language. Suggestive themes.**

* * *

The morning came far too quickly. Gilbert felt like he didn't get any sleep at all since it took him so long to fall asleep; he kept thinking about what Ivan was going to say to him last night, and the look he was giving him was strange too. He also thought about telling Ivan the truth about who he was and about his family, but he realized that the Russian would probably just laugh in his face. Who would ever believe that Gilbert is a Prince? After all, he himself didn't even believe it; he didn't _want_ to believe it. He didn't even _think_ about how Ivan would react to hearing that he's basically immortal. Besides, why would Ivan even care? It would probably just cause more problems between them, and Gilbert was trying to make things better with Ivan. It was better to just lie and keep it all a secret.

He woke up feeling sluggish and a bit sore, and just wanted to go back to sleep. However he heard some rustling sounds in the room and he blinked his eyes open, groaning as light filled his pupils and instantly causing them to close. He rolled over onto his back and looked over in the direction that Ivan was in, and carefully blinked his pink eyes open again. The Russian was awake and shirtless and sitting on his bed, looking through one of his bags. The albino watched as the other male pulled a shirt from his bag, and he grinned a little as he sat up, supporting his upper body on the mattress with his elbows.

"What a _lovely_ show I've got this morning." Gilbert teased, keeping the grin on his lips as Ivan turned to look at him.

"Oh, you're awake." The Russian said and quickly pulled his shirt over his head. "I didn't expect you up yet. How did you sleep?" he asked.

Gilbert simply gave a weak shrug. "I've had better."

Ivan let a small smile take his lips for just a moment. "How about your ass? Still sore?" he asked with some humor in his voice.

The albino's eyes flattened with a slightly annoyed look, though picking up on Ivan's mockery. "Your interest in my ass is getting a bit obsessive. Should I be worried?"

"Just looking out for my partner." The Russian answered almost valiantly. "After all, we have a job to do today, remember?" Ivan said and ruffled his hair out, not caring if it was curling up messily.

"Right..." Gilbert said and yawned. He pushed himself off of his bed and stretched a little. "How far is the town from here?" he asked.

"Not far. We'll leave as soon as you're ready and just stop to eat along the way."

Gilbert turned his head to Ivan, his eyes widening slightly, "No breakfast here?"

"I don't think that's a good idea. I talked to Charlie, the guy who owns the inn, and he told me that Vincent had to be locked in one of the safes in the basement last night." Ivan said.

"Why?"

"Because a _certain_ _someone_ smells delicious and to keep that person from becoming a midnight snack, Charlie locked him in a safe." The Russian answered.

"Oh." Was Gilbert's only reply. He felt a bit nauseous at the thought of a vampire biting into his neck, and he actually rubbed at the skin of his neck in reaction. He knew he couldn't help who and what he is, but he did feel a bit bad that he was causing them to lose breakfast because he smells good.

"Anyway, grab what you came in with and we'll get going."

Gilbert didn't say another word and simply grabbed his carry-on bag and quickly put his boots on along with his cloak. He messily tied his hair back into its ribbon, leaving some strands falling down over his ears, and then gathered his weapons, attaching them to his back and side. Once he was done, he joined Ivan by the door and they walked out.

Downstairs, Charlie was cleaning tables. The man noticed the two after hearing their footsteps and he glanced up at them. "Good morning you two." He said and then went to them with a grim look on his face. "I'm so sorry that you have to leave so early. I apologize on Vincent's behalf; he doesn't usually get this bad." He said, looking at Gilbert, who looked a bit uneasy still.

"It's quite all right." Ivan said and shoved his hand into his pocket and pulled out a few coins. He extended his hand to Charlie. "Here, for the room."

Charlie shook his head. "No, last night was on the house. After all, it was dangerous to sleep here. I wasn't sure if the safe would hold Vincent but I think he just wore himself out." He said with a nervous smile.

"Well then we'll just be off." Ivan said and bowed his head slightly and headed for the door.

"Yeah, bye." Gilbert said awkwardly to fill the silence.

"Again, I am _so_ sorry about Vincent." Charlie pleaded just as the Elf was turning away.

"Really, it's okay." Gilbert tried to smile, but the way he shuffled to the door after Ivan clearly proved that Gilbert wanted away from the inn.

Surprisingly, Ivan waited for Gilbert and even let him out of the inn first. For a moment it felt like the Russian was being protective of the albino, but Gilbert didn't want to assume ridiculous things... though he _did_ show some interest in his well-being earlier, even if it came off as a joke.

Ivan wasn't even sure if he was caring for the other or if he just wanted to keep him alive today. He heard from Elizaveta how he fought against Beatrice, and how she said that he was strong and could hold his own, so maybe Gilbert _wouldn't_ be a bad partner after all. He's an archer, which would be useful to cover him from a distance if needed. Elizaveta also mentioned something about a giant blanket of ice, but the way she described it was strange, like Gilbert was just creating the ice from thin air with no effort at all. Ivan had never heard of such magic, and he was curious about what made Gilbert so special that he didn't have to charge his spells or say an incantation. Fire was easy to make burn in ones hands without much charge, since it's fueled by emotions, but ice... ice is _dead_, so he didn't understand how Gilbert could do it.

"How long until you want to stop?" Gilbert's voice sounded like a muffle to Ivan. "Ivan? Oi, Ivan!" Gilbert yelled, and finally knocked the Russian from his trance.

"Sorry, what did you say?" Ivan asked, looking a bit confused.

"Jeeze, you're so worried about _me_ dying on this trip and _you're_ the one spacing out." Gilbert groaned as he tightened the straps on his horse. "I asked how long you wanted to wait until we stopped to eat."

"Oh... we'll travel for about an hour and then we'll stop." Ivan said, and attached his bag to Riverwind's saddle, and then mounted her. Gilbert did the same to his horse and Ivan was pleasantly surprised when he saw that the albino could mount his own horse on his own now.

"All right, lead the way." Gilbert said, and Ivan did, the albino following behind him.

.

After a few silent minutes of riding, Ivan pulled back a little to ride next to Gilbert. "I owe you an apology." He started, and Gilbert looked over at him. "Actually, I owe you a few, I think. I shouldn't have pried into your life, you're allowed to have secrets; we all do. Also, I should have told you about Vincent being a vampire. I just didn't think he'd want to eat you..." Ivan said this in a bit of a mumble.

Gilbert smiled ever-so-slightly. "Don't worry about it, nothing bad happened and I still have all my blood." He said.

Ivan sighed softly, "Let's try to keep it that way too. I read over the job description this morning while you were still sleeping and we're going up against a troll. From the number of deaths this thing has caused, I'm guessing it's a pretty big one too." Ivan said.

"A troll...?"

"You've never seen one?"

"No, we don't have them were I'm from."

The Russian raised an eyebrow, "What, did you live under a rock or something?"

'_Basically._' Gilbert thought.

"They can be the size of a bear, or bigger, usually with gray or greenish flesh. Multiple eyes, long fangs, usually smell really bad. They rely on their blunt strength rather than speed so I doubt we'll have any problems if we work together. However, they have a good sense of smell and if this thing gets a hold of you, you might be losing a limb, so be careful."

Gilbert swallowed roughly and quickly thought about getting his arm or leg ripped off, and felt himself getting ready to gag.

"Anyway, I'm sure we'll be fine. I've taken down demons on my own before without getting a scratch." Ivan said.

"Why do you even need a partner then?" Gilbert asked, a little annoyed by Ivan's feats.

"The College wants to make sure everyone has backup... besides, it gets lonely out here alone." Ivan sighed and kept his gaze on the road in front of them.

Gilbert stopped talking. He understood what Ivan meant; it would be very lonely out here alone. He hated when he was a few dozen meters behind Ivan last night, let alone actually being by himself. Even if he and Ivan weren't the best of friends, it was still nice to have someone to talk to.

.

Soon it was time to stop, and the two found themselves sitting on the side of the road with their bags at their side. They had bread and some fruit that they had taken from the College before they left. Eating silently, but their minds wandering aimlessly. Mainly Ivan's though, he wanted to ask Gilbert about his magic but he felt like maybe prying more into the albino's life would cause another blowout.

Instead, he kept himself silent.

"So Ivan, what did you do before joining the College?" Gilbert suddenly asked, and then tore a piece of bread off with his teeth.

"What?" Ivan asked, looking confused.

Gilbert took a second to chew and swallow. "I'm attempting to get to know you a little better. C'mon, tell me about your life pre-College." He said as he waved a loaf of bread in the Russian's direction.

"Well... I was a mercenary mage for hire. I'd take jobs, much like how the College gives jobs, and I'd go out, kill a monster and come home to my sisters." He said.

"Did you enjoy that?"

Ivan stared at Gilbert for a moment, noticing small traces of sadness in the albino's face. "I thought I did, but after a while... no, not really. I risked getting killed every day, and most townspeople hated me except for drunken women looking for a fuck. I was lonely, so I took what company I could get."

"Meaning the women?"

"I had a few flings, yeah. Not proud of it but I was stupid and lonely and drunk, so." Ivan said, his face clearly showing his disgust for himself and his previous ways.

Gilbert let out a small laugh. "Well I don't know what that's like, having flings or being drunk. I was a good boy, for the most part." he said with a chuckle.

"What about you? What did you do?" the Russian inquired.

Gilbert then brought his knees up to his chest. "That depends on where you want to start. My family was nobility, so I had an image to keep up. I never wanted any part of it, and my father hated me from the beginning so I was always a bit rebellious. I was bored, so I'd sneak out of the house, but my father would get mad and yell at me when he found out. However this was all before I met you. 8 years ago when I went home, things were even worse. My father died recently and left the family business to my brother, and the town hated me for leaving the first time. Whenever I'd go out, people would corner me in the streets and try to mug me and do other things, but in the end they wouldn't, claiming that they didn't want to wake the 'demon' that I was a host for." Gilbert said and bit his lip.

Ivan noticed how Gilbert looked like he was in pain. "You don't have to tell me anything else, Gilbert. Forget I asked." He said. 'So _he does have a reason for acting like this..._' he thought, feeling bad for lashing out at Gilbert several times.

"No it's fine. I'm all right, after all, but I was scared of everyone so I ended up locking myself in my room, writing and just being alone. I thought it was better but I honestly wanted someone to interact with." He mumbled and buried his head into his knees. "You must think I'm weak, huh? Hell, I _am_ weak."

Ivan sighed, "You're not weak, just broken." The Russian said. Gilbert looked up at him curiously. "But you're doing fine now, you're not alone, you're with the College of Torchlight, and not many can say that. Keep your chin up and don't let the past haunt you." He said.

"Easy for you to say, you're not an Elf."

Ivan wasn't sure what to think of that, so he just stood up. "Come on, we should get going, after all, we have a troll to kill." He said.

Gilbert watched as Ivan packed his stuff together and mounted his horse. He felt a small smile tugging at his lips and he stood to his feet, shoving the last piece of his bread into his mouth and chewing it as he mounted Enea.

.

The town wasn't too far, only a few hours of riding and they were there. It was a fairly nice town, and it kind of reminded Gilbert of his own home, even the looks the people were giving him were nostalgic and of course a bit unnerving. They found themselves sitting in the waiting area of the city hall until they were called up to the throne where the ruler of the city sat.

"Good day, sir." Ivan greeted with a small bow of his head, "We're from the College of Torchlight. We're here to deal with your troll problem."

"Good, it's about time someone took care of it." The man said, clearly and unnecessarily annoyed with the two men in front of him. It irked Gilbert, but he stayed his tongue. "I'll keep this short. Head north until you see a bunch of burned trees, inside that part of the forest is where the monster lives. Kill it, bring me one of its fangs and I'll give you your money." He said and then made a shooing motion with his hand. "Go on, off with you."

Ivan gave a slight bow and turned, walking away. Gilbert paused for a moment in confusion and looked at the noble, who was grinning creepily at him. He turned and went after Ivan.

"How can you be so nice to a jerk like that?" Gilbert barely waited until they were out of the hall to ask annoyingly.

"I'm nice to you, aren't I?" Ivan retorted with a grin.

"That's different, that guy doesn't even care if we die." Gilbert said and crossed his arms in irritation. "At least _we're_ looking out for each other."

"True, but he runs a city, that life can't be too easy." Ivan sighed, '_So you'd care if I died?_' he wondered for a moment. "Let's forget about him and go kill us a troll, all right?"

Gilbert smiled a little. "All right." He nodded in agreement.

.

The two left their horses back at the town stable and walked on foot to the burned forest. It was eerie, and sent a few shivers down Gilbert spine as they neared it. It seemed that only the outside of the forest was burned, like someone charred the outer trees and put the fire out. This world definitely had some strange environments.

"Do we have a plan?" Gilbert asked quietly after tapping Ivan on the shoulder.

The Russian pondered for a moment and then looked up. "How easily can you get up into those trees?" he asked.

Gilbert followed his gaze and looked at the several branches. "Easily, and they look like they can hold my weight." He said.

"All right, then I want you to get up there and follow close to me, when we find the troll I'll distract it and you shoot it in the legs with your arrows to hinder it, can you do that?" he asked.

Gilbert nodded, "I'll be right behind you." He said and then moved over to the tree closest to him. First he untied his cloak and took it off and dropped it near the base of the tree. It was to have better mobility and to not get caught on it when climbing. Gilbert prepared himself to jump and he launched himself up enough to grab onto a branch a few feet above his head. Ivan watched as the surprisingly limber Elf swung his body up, swinging himself and flipping up so that he was sitting on the branch with perfect balance.

"Well, you're acrobatic." Ivan commented with a small chuckle.

"I told you I got bored back home, this is what I did." Gilbert grinned, feeling strangely proud of himself.

Ivan smiled a little and brandished his sword from its sheath and began walking through the partly dead forest. Gilbert stayed above ground, leaping easily from tree to tree as he followed the Russian below. Ivan soon raised his hand, signaling for Gilbert to stop, he then pointed forward and Gilbert glanced around. His pink eyes soon landed on a fairly large and ugly monster. Its skin was a greenish color, like a swamp, and it was busy shoving its face into the mutilated carcass of an animal that resembled a deer. The troll didn't seem to notice them quite yet, and Ivan turned his head to look up at Gilbert. He gave a subtle nod and then walked further out, toward the troll. Gilbert narrowed his eyes and pulled a silver arrow from the quiver on his back and loaded it onto his bow, pulling the arrow back and locking his arm in place and waited for his chance. Ivan lit a flame in his left hand just in case and walked faster, and soon got the trolls attention. The monster let out a terrible sound and began to go after Ivan. The Russian moved back, walking backward to bring the monster closer to Gilbert so he could get a better shot, but suddenly something whipped through the air and passed Ivan's head with a sharp sound and stuck right into the troll's leg, the monster hindered and collapsed, groaning loadly. Ivan looked down and noticed it was one of Gilbert's arrows. He was momentarily shocked that Gilbert hit on the first arrow from that distance. He really was a good shot.

"Keep shooting!" Ivan yelled and then charged toward the troll. Gilbert didn't reply and instantly got to work, loading arrow after arrow and then letting them fly. Every arrow hit the troll either in the legs or abdomen. Soon the monster was unable to walk and simply crawled toward the Russian, roaring loudly in pain and anger. Ivan circled around the large creature and ran up onto his back, he heaved his sword up, twirled the blade to point down, gripped the hilt with both hands and then brought it down, burying his sword deep through the back of the troll's neck, the tip of his blade coming out through the front and digging into the ground below. The monster's movements went still and its breathing faded out. After waiting a few moments, Ivan pulled his blade from the monster's neck, blood covering the shiny steel and dripping off onto the brown dirt below. He breathed for a moment and then he hopped off the troll's back, wiping his blade with a cloth he had at his side and then sliding it into its sheath.

Gilbert watched as Ivan dug his blade into the troll's neck, and he held his breath to steady a loaded arrow, just in case the monster somehow got back up, but when Ivan pulled his blade from the troll, Gilbert sighed and loosened his arm and let his bow rest at his side after sliding the unused arrow back into his quiver. The Elf stayed perched in his tree, breathing softly and coming down from the adrenaline rush that was pumping blood through his body quickly. He's never experienced something so exciting, or seen such a display of strength.

'_Ivan is incredible._' The thought came instinctively. The Elf felt hot, and he shook his head to ignore some strange thoughts he suddenly found himself having of Ivan, of how attractive Ivan looked when he pulled that blade from the monster, and he tried to blame the heat in his body on the blood rushing through his veins. He attached his bow to his back and then slid off the tree branch, catching it with his hands and landing his feet on solid ground again. By the time he tied his cloak around his neck and turned around, Ivan was next to him with a fang from the troll's mouth in his hand.

"That... that was _awesome_!" Gilbert suddenly exclaimed toward the Russian, his eyes seeming to shimmer. The outburst caught Ivan off guard and he stopped and stared at the excited albino. "I've never seen someone so effortlessly dig their blade into a monster like that! Hell, I've never seen someone _kill_ something like that before!" he shouted, not aware of how excited he looked. His eyes were glazed over with astonishment.

"Well, I couldn't have done that without you." Ivan said, and suddenly Gilbert's excitement turned to something more shy. He looked a tad bit confused even.

"Really?"

"Yeah, with you sticking those arrows in him, it let me approach him faster and not have to do as much work. You're one hell of a shot, by the way." He said and suddenly placed his hand on Gilbert's shoulder and grinned down at the star-struck Elf. "... what's wrong?" he asked after noticing how Gilbert was just staring up at him with widened eyes.

"Oh... nothing. It's just, no one's ever complimented me for... anything, really." He said and looked away from the other, feeling embarrassed.

Ivan smiled to himself, and suddenly blushed softly when he thought, '_How cute._' about the way Gilbert was acting. "Anyway, we should get this fang back to that idiot in town." He said and held up the yellowish and slightly bloody tooth of the troll.

Gilbert covered his mouth and felt like he was going to gag a little, "Right."

"Oh, did you want to get your arrows back from the troll, or...?" Ivan asked.

"No, I have plenty to last for our entire trip." He said, "Besides, I don't feel like tearing them out of that monster."

"Fair enough."

.

Back in town, people gave the two men cautious looks, not so much toward Gilbert but toward Ivan because he had some blood splattered on his clothing. Apparently it was odd for anyone in this town to get their hands dirty. It was too clean and the people were all nobility except for a small section where people begged for stale bread.

They once again entered the town's main hall and the same noble was sitting on his fancy seat; he looked bored out of his mind. Ivan led and walked to him and held out the fang of the troll.

"Here, sir." He said.

The man gave him skeptical eyes and then glanced over at Gilbert and grinned. "Leave the fang on the table in the room to your right." He said, and Ivan nodded and began to walk. Gilbert started to follow but the noble suddenly spoke, "You, Elf, come here. I want to talk to you." He said.

Gilbert glanced back to Ivan and then back to the noble before walking to him. "Yes?"

"You seem far too... _delicate_, to be fighting monsters with a barbarian like that man... why not join my court and you can be my... personal attendant?" he said, his eyes trailing up and down the Elf's body hungrily.

Gilbert cringed back and glared. "No thanks, I'm perfectly happy with my current job." He spat.

The man scoffed. "Suit yourself, boy. I was offering money, better food and clothing."

"Right and the details of the job would be what? Fulfilling your every desire?" Gilbert said, his eyes burning with annoyance. "Aren't there enough whores in this town for you, or do you just have a preference for sick-looking men?"

The man twitched visibly and glared at the albino, but before he could retaliate, Ivan came back and stood by Gilbert. The Russian noticed the tension in the air and glanced back and forth from his partner and the noble a few times.

"Give them their money and see them out." The noble growled, and a guard approached the two men and gave Ivan a purse of coins.

Gilbert grabbed onto Ivan's wrist suddenly and pulled the Russian out of the building without any warning.

"Gilbert are you all right?" Ivan asked when Gilbert didn't let go of his wrist even after they were a ways from the hall. The albino was pulling him toward the stables.

"We're leaving town." Gilbert said.

"What? But the next town is pretty far."

"Then we'll camp in the woods."

"Gilbert what is going on?" Ivan said and suddenly pulled back on his arm, which caused Gilbert to be flung backward and actually crash right into Ivan.

"That stupid bastard in there! He said I was too delicate to be with you and offered me a job as his 'personal attendant', but I could tell by the way he was looking at me that he just wants to fuck me like a whore." The albino bit his lower lip and glared toward Ivan's chest.

Ivan suddenly gripped onto Gilbert's shoulders and rubbed gently to comfort the other. "I wouldn't have let him, after all, you're my partner and we make a good team." He said, and Gilbert looked up at him curiously. Ivan then blushed a little and shifted his eyes away, "Besides, I think I'm actually starting to like you a little, so I think I'll keep you around for a while."

Gilbert lightly slapped Ivan's hands away from him, "Oh _thanks_, I'm so glad you care." He teased and gave a playful grin.

Ivan put his hand on Gilbert's back and gently pushed him forward to get him to walk. "Come on, we have a pretty long trip, we'll stop in the evening and set up camp for the night."

Gilbert made no attempt to retaliate.

.

The next few hours went by rather quickly. The two rode their horses side by side and talked for a while about the monster they just killed. Ivan asked about Gilbert's archery skills and Gilbert told him that the bow belonged to his mother and that she gave it to him before she died, and how she always encouraged him to rely on something other than his magic. Ivan found himself wondering about the albino's ice again, but left it at that.

Soon, they found themselves in an open patch of grass in the forest surrounded by thick trees and the darkening sky above them. Ivan made a pile of wood with some sticks he found nearby and then lit a fire with one of his hands. The two warmed themselves by the fire in silence for a moment before Ivan stood up.

"I saw a small pond nearby when I was gathering firewood, I'm going to go bathe and get the dirt off of me." He said and picked up his bag and dagger.

Gilbert simply nodded and looked into the fire in front of him when Ivan walked away.

Through some thick trees Ivan stumbled upon the pond he saw earlier and walked to it. He stripped his clothing off, his scarf being the last he removed and then walked out into the water. The pond was deep enough to reach his chest but he only went up to his stomach and let his body float in the water for a while. He rubbed at his arms and dipped his head under the water, ruffling his hair out to free it of any dirt. He was soon done, taking a quick bath so he wouldn't leave Gilbert alone in the woods for too long. He knew that if a bear or something attacked, Gilbert wouldn't be able to defend himself very well. He gathered up his clothing and re-dressed quickly, and went back to camp.

Gilbert was lying on his back next to the fire, staring up at the night sky. The sun had set quickly, and the moon was rising.

"I'm back." Ivan announced, and Gilbert sat up to greet him.

"Welcome back." Gilbert said and then stood up. "I think I'll go take a bath was well, I'll be back in a little bit." He said and walked past Ivan.

The Russian nodded and took a seat next to the fire he had created a while ago and warmed his hands by it.

As Gilbert walked toward the pond, he nearly tripped on something. Looking down, he noticed that his foot caught the strap of Ivan's bag that was lying by a bush. '_He must have forgotten it when he went back. I'll just take it with me when I'm done._' He thought and began to undress, pulling his ribbon from his hair and letting the white strands fall over his shoulders and back.

The water was warm so it was easy to move through. The Elf lowered his body into the water and sighed. He let himself float on his back for a while, staring up at the night sky above him.

'_I should tell Ivan more about my family, he seems to want to learn more about me..._' he closed his eyes and moved his body through the water a little. '_But what do I tell him? I can't tell him that I'm a Prince, he won't believe me, or he will and go back to being rude to me... he seems to dislike Elves too, so I can't tell him what Sector I'm from, or he'll really hate me..._' he groaned out loud and stood up.

The water was up to his waist and he looked around for a moment before holding his hands out. Suddenly streams of water floated up from the surface of the pond into the center of his palm. He smiled a little and twirled around, gliding his hands through the air and making the water around him spin and dance. It wasn't magic, it was in his blood. This was his gift of being a Neirunian, control over any and all water and the ability to create it.

Back at their camp, Ivan sat there, making fire dance in his palm. He suddenly noticed that he didn't have his bag. Without thinking, he got up and walked toward the lake. He saw his bag next to the bush he left it by and he bent down to pick it up. As his hand gripped around the strap, he heard a loud splash to the side and he looked over toward it.

His eyes went wide, for the sight before him was one that was both amazing and beautiful. Gilbert was dancing, but it wasn't a normal dance, almost like stances, moving his hands quickly through the air and streams of water bolting after them, his eyes closed and a content look was on his features. Gilbert, naked and glistening with beads of water dripping down his skin, only the moon lighting his slim figure. Gilbert, looking elegant and beautiful, his hair damp and sticking to the back of his neck, his entire body seeming to glow.

Suddenly Gilbert brought both of his arms up above his head, his eyes still closed and his mouth open a little. A wave of water followed his hands and then his fingers spread out as far as they could go, and all of a sudden the water froze into solid and shiny ice. Ivan swallowed roughly as Gilbert brought his index finger up to the surface of the ice and slid his finger across it, causing the ice touched by his finger to melt back to water and create a sort of waterfall over the ice.

It was beautiful, Gilbert was beautiful, but Ivan began to feel a warmth in his groin after watching the Elf. After realizing that he was becoming aroused very quickly by the sight, he reluctantly tore his eyes away from Gilbert and stumbled through the bushes nearby and made his way back to camp. He sat by his fire and placed his bag over his lap in a vain attempt to keep his arousal from getting worse, but now that he couldn't see Gilbert, his mind created images of the naked Elf twirling around and splashing himself with water. He was damn thankful that Gilbert was up to his waist in the water so he didn't see any lower, but now his imagination could fill that missing image for him.

After about 10 minutes, Ivan found himself just sitting silently and feeling a bit awkward, but thankfully he was able to calm himself down. He barely even heard the snapping of sticks and footsteps that were approaching. He looked up and Gilbert had just walked back into camp.

"The water in that pond is really nice." Gilbert said and sighed in content, sitting down on a patch of grass across from Ivan. He was brushing out his hair through his finger, wringing it of some water occasionally.

"Yeah, it is." Ivan commented and looked down. Gilbert watched Ivan with a strange look, and noticed how the Russian was holding his bag onto his lap tightly.

"I see you got your bag." He said and Ivan stiffened. "I was going to bring it back myself but I guess you got it yourself." He said and when Ivan looked up at Gilbert with the guiltiest look on his face, Gilbert actually let out a loud and full laugh. "Jeeze, don't look so guilty, Ivan." he said as he tried to keep from laughing. "So, what? You saw me taking a bath, it's not a big deal, it's not like you saw anything, right?" Ivan looked away, and that made Gilbert blush a little bit, "What _did_ you see?"

"Nothing... just, your little water dance, or whatever." He answered.

"Ah." Gilbert sighed in relief. "That's a little less embarrassing than you seeing my dick." He laughed a little through his blush, "But hey, I'm not some water imp or faerie, so don't think I'm weak because I was playing with water."

"I don't think you're weak because of that. I don't think you're weak at all." Ivan said and clutched his bag tighter. "I thought it was... pretty." He said embarrassingly.

"What? Really? My water dance?" Gilbert was stunned by the comment.

"Yeah... I've never seen anyone so effortlessly use magic like that with water. It was pretty..."

Gilbert curled his legs to his chest and blushed, for some reason he felt like Ivan was calling _him_ pretty instead of his water. "Uh... actually, it's not really magic." He said and Ivan looked at him curiously. "My Sector of Elves can control water at will, I don't know how but we can. I can use magic to create water, but I can also just control any around me." Gilbert explained.

"I see... that's pretty cool, actually."

The two smiled at each other for a moment, and both could feel an awkwardness in the exchange. Gilbert coughed and Ivan looked away.

"So uh, tell me about your sisters. They mages too?" Gilbert asked suddenly, desperate to change the subject and to get rid of the awkward silence.

The question caught Ivan off guard but he was more than willing to answer. "My big sister is. Well, kind of. She used to be a member of the College, but she doesn't use magic anymore, apparently she caused someone to get hurt and she decided to never use magic again." He said, "My little sister can't use magic, but she loves sharp objects. She actually gave me the dagger I carry with me." He smiled a little.

"I see... my brother gave me this-" he started as he pulled a necklace out of his bag. "before I left." Ivan looked at the cross pendant that Gilbert was holding. "It was his favorite, and he told me to take it to remember him by."

"Your brother sounds nice."

"He is. He has a lot to deal with, what with running the- uh, family business. People expect a lot from him... I feel terrible for leaving him again, I'm a horrible brother." Gilbert mumbled and buried his face into his knees.

Ivan's eyes narrowed, he could understand why Gilbert felt guilty, he himself felt guilty for leaving his sisters and then not visiting when he said that he would. "You shouldn't feel guilty, Gilbert." He said, catching the albino's attention. "You shouldn't feel guilty about doing what you want to do in life; after all, we don't have much time on this planet, so we have to make the most of it, right?"

Gilbert lowered his face more, "Yeah, right..." he mumbled. '_You may not have much time, but me... I have a few hundred years too much._'

Ivan noticed the dreadful look on the Elf's face, and he desperately wanted to fix it. "So Gilbert, uh... tell me about your people, your... Sector, I think you call it." he said.

"My Sector...?" Gilbert repeated, "... why do you care?" he asked.

Ivan shrugged, "Just thought I'd get to know you better."

Gilbert accepted that reason easily. "We have a royal family." He said, and Ivan looked at him with anticipation. "Though lately, they've been broken. The king is distant, the queen is dead, one of the Princes is under a lot of pressure, and the other Prince ran away. It sounds like a horror story rather than history really." Gilbert said.

"Have you ever met the royal family?" Ivan asked.

"Oh yeah, um... my father would have to visit the palace a lot on business. I used to play with the Prince when we were younger; after his brother left, he was very lonely so he always wanted to see me." Gilbert said with a smile, though it was as fake as his story. '_How many lies am I going to tell?_' He asked himself and bit his lip.

"That's nice..." Ivan smiled as he gazed into the fire between himself and the Elf. "Not that this isn't interesting but we should probably get some sleep. We have another day tomorrow and I think it's going to be harder than today."

"What's the job?" Gilbert asked.

"Gremlins, and lots of them. We just have to clear out the cave they live in, but gremlins are tough in the area we're going to, the cold makes them stronger, it seems, nothing like the ones around the College. We'll have to be careful." He said.

Gilbert nodded weakly. He wasn't sure how he'd handle going up against gremlins. They were fast and attacked in numbers and he just had a bow, though he could use his magic, but still. Gilbert was always one to see the bad in every situation. Ivan would protect them both anyway; Ivan is just that kind of person.

The two laid down on opposite sides of the fire, using their bags and clothing to be more comfortable on the hard ground. Gilbert stared up at the stars above him, thinking how beautiful the sight was, how beautiful this world was in general compared to Neirun. The sky was something Gilbert hasn't seen in 8 years before he left home, even the water up here was so much nicer. Gilbert would never use the water he creates since it gives one a tingly feeling if bathed in it; it's not pleasant after a while, and the natural water underground was often dirty and also didn't feel too good.

Ivan laid on his side, his eyes closed nearly completely, making it appear that he was asleep. He wasn't, but rather he was looking through his eyelashes at the albino a few feet from him, watching as the Elf stared up at the stars twinkling above him. He couldn't get the image of Gilbert in the pond out of his head, how beautiful Gilbert had looked. He thought that he liked how Gilbert was toughening up and was able to fight, but then when he saw Gilbert gracefully moving with the water, he realized that he liked the delicate Gilbert. On Gilbert, delicacy was _incredibly_ attractive.

The Russian squeezed his eyes shut and told himself to stop thinking but he couldn't, he was completely hung up on it now. He just hoped that he'd be able to ignore it in the morning and that his meaningless feelings would be gone when he woke up.

* * *

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	6. Heavy Thoughts

**[Originally posted: 9/30/2013]**

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Hinted yaoi, fighting, blood, minor non-con, language.**

* * *

Ivan groaned as he opened his eyes. He moved an inch but his back ached from sleeping on the cold hard ground. He instantly slapped a hand over his face and cursed at himself as he remembered his dream-filled night of a certain albino. It was pathetic and a bit shameful how his dreams displayed an unspoken desire that he wasn't even aware he had. How one dream was based on the scene of last night, but instead he walked out into the pond, stripping his clothing as he walked, and joined Gilbert and wrapped his arms around the Elf's waist from behind, taking a moment to give a sweet kiss to the pale skin of the albino's neck before moving down a little lower...

He groaned lowly at his thoughts and turned over, burying one side of his face into his bag that he was using as a pillow. He heard some rummaging to the side and he opened his eyes, and he was annoyed with how his heart fluttered in his chest at what he saw.

Gilbert was crouched down to the ground, sitting on the back of his calves with his knees apart, shirtless and looking through his own bag. His skin looked so creamy and smooth and Ivan found himself thinking what Gilbert's skin felt like to the touch. His eyes followed down the albino's curved spinal cord until he reached the hem of the tight pants that Gilbert was wearing. Those pants were _killing_ Ivan. In the position that he was in, the pants were smooth and hugged tightly to Gilbert's behind. He began to wonder if Gilbert was sensitive or ticklish, or if Gilbert's cheeks would burn a bright red under his touch.

'_No, no he's not even interested in me._' Was what Ivan told himself and knew for a fact, but that didn't stop his mind from thinking otherwise. That's why it's called a fantasy. 'Why am I even thinking this of_ him..._?'

Gilbert finally pulled a piece of clothing from his bag and stood up. His eyes glanced over at Ivan and he saw the Russian looking right at him. "Oh hey, Good morning." He greeted with an annoyingly cute smile.

"Yeah, 'morning." Ivan replied and sat up. "What are you doing?" He asked, looking at the clothing in Gilbert's hand.

"Oh, well you said that we're heading to a colder area today, right? And it's getting kind of cold already so I'm changing into something warmer." He said.

'_You don't need that to keep you warm._' The Russian's mind said on impulse. "Right, of course." Ivan said quickly and stood up, trying his best to not look directly at the albino's... well, _everything_.

Gilbert tilted his head a little, noticing how Ivan was acting a bit strange, much like he had been for the last few nights. The albino decided to ignore it for now and pulled the large woolen shirt over his head. It was long, and reached down to his thighs. The shirt was very warm and thick; it would keep him nice and warm in the coming winter.

"Where did you get that?" Ivan asked, trying to ignore how utterly good Gilbert looked in the shirt. How the sleeves were too long for him so the ends draped over his hands was just adorable too. The fabric was a creamy white color that was a little darker than Gilbert's skin. An all-white Gilbert was an image that looked really nice in Ivan's head.

"Elizaveta made it for me." Gilbert said, "She's scary but she really knows how to knit."

Ivan let out a soft laugh and stood up. "We're all a bit weird, aren't we? Have you figured out your 'quirk' yet?" he asked.

"Not yet. Maybe my quirk is that I'm the normal one." Gilbert joked with a chuckle.

"I highly doubt it; we'll figure yours out eventually." Ivan said, somewhat hoping that Gilbert's quirk involved him in some way or another. He wasn't even trying to subdue his thoughts anymore.

Soon enough, Ivan prepared a fire while Gilbert got their food out. The Russian warmed some bread with his magic and boiled some water for tea and the two sat quietly and ate their warm meal. The air was getting damper and colder. The warm season was nearing its end and soon it would snow by the College. Where they were going today it probably already is snowing. Up in the mountains it's always cold and usually always snowed.

Ivan took a sip of his tea and glanced over the rim of his small wooden cup. Gilbert was sitting across from him in Indian style, his hands cupped around his mug as he held it too his lips. It was a little too hot for him to drink yet, and the albino kept pursing his lips a little and blowing on the liquid to cool it.

"... you're an ice mage right? Can't you just make it colder?" Ivan asked, becoming annoyed with Gilbert, but only because he looked so cute. How did everything the Elf do suddenly become cute? Just a few days ago he thought the way Gilbert walked was annoying, but right now... he couldn't remember why.

Gilbert looked over his cup at Ivan and his eyes narrowed slightly into an annoyed glare. "I don't like using my magic for trivial things." he said. "I can stand to lose a few minutes of my life to let my tea cool down."

'_Well that wasn't cute._' Ivan thought, and simply went back to drinking his tea. Suddenly Ivan realized that everything was fine, he didn't _like_Gilbert, just his appearance. His body... the way he does things, the way he moves. How he was holding that cup with both of his hands and taking small cautious sips of his tea.

...

Okay maybe this _wasn't_ better. Gilbert is too attractive to be able to ignore just because of his attitude. Actually... his attitude made him cuter, almost like a challenge... kind of like a wild animal needing to be tamed. It probably wouldn't take much effort to tame Gilbert though; he was weak compared to Ivan. Mentally and physically.

'_What am I thinking... ?_' Ivan asked himself, feeling a small tighten in his lower belly. He needed to distract himself before he developed a bit of a problem.

"We should probably get going soon." Gilbert said. He had been eating the entire time and Ivan didn't even notice it, he was too busy locked in his own mind.

"Why the rush?" the Russian asked.

"Well, while you were _snoring away_ over there, I looked over the details of our job and I think we're going to be in that cave for a while." Gilbert said and took another drink of his tea, "The locals say it used to be a mining cave until part of it collapsed last year, but the collapse broke into another cave, and you can guess who lived in there."

"The gremlins..." Ivan said.

"Yep."

"Wonderful, we have two caves to search, and gremlins are a pain to chase down." Ivan groaned and rubbed his temples.

"Well you could just run through there blasting fire everywhere and smoke them all out." Gilbert joked with a laugh. The mental image of Ivan running and just letting his flames go was amusing, if not a little terrifying.

"Yeah because _that's_ a good idea. I'll pass out if I use too much magic, you know what that's like, right?" Ivan grinned when he saw the smug look on Gilbert's face drop into annoyance and a bit of embarrassment.

"I told you! I hadn't eaten in days and I was tired! Give me a break!" Gilbert retorted and then stood up. "I'm going for a run with Enea, don't follow me." He said as he walked to his horse.

Ivan's grin disappeared and he felt a bit sad and looked down at his food. He heard the reins whip a little and heard Gilbert give a small yell. Ivan looked up, thinking maybe something was wrong, but the albino took off on his horse into the forest.

"He's a fast learner..." Ivan said to himself and sighed and picked up his small loaf of bread and tore a piece of it off and carefully pushed it between his teeth. '_He's starting to act like the old Gilbert again. Still as stupid as ever._' He thought as he chewed.

"I'm going to have to go find him in a few minutes." He sighed.

.

Gilbert sped through the forest with Enea, jumping over fallen trees and dodging the branches of the ones still standing. It felt nice to run free with his companion like this. With Ivan he felt a bit restricted, like he couldn't be free. It bothered him. He didn't need Ivan, all he needed was himself.

Soon Gilbert came out onto a road and he slowed down to look around. It was quiet and empty with a large field of grass spanning out in front of him.

He leaned down to Enea and smiled, "What do you say, girl, you want to run more?" he asked to her, and as if she understood she neighed excitedly. "Well I can't deny that." He said happily and gave another soft whip to his reins and Enea took off running again.

He ran along the road for a while and then turned to let Enea run where she wanted. She was a beautiful creature and Gilbert got a thrill out of riding her like this, there was just no greater feeling than running free with the wind blowing through his hair. He lowered his upper body like he had seen Ivan do before and grinned with excitement.

Suddenly Enea took a sharp turn and headed back for the road, which was strange. Gilbert looked up and thought he heard something so he looked behind him and he gasped out loud. There was a group of 5 people chasing him on horseback. They must have been hidden in the forest there.

Gilbert looked back to Enea and gave another whip to his reins, "Faster Enea, move faster!" he yelled in a panic. The men behind him were carrying swords, and one was holding a rope and twirling it around.

Just as they reached the main road, Enea let out a scared whinnying noise and suddenly she toppled over and Gilbert was thrown off of her. He landed on the rough stone road and the fabric of his sweater tore, scraping the skin underneath until blood was trickling down his arm.

He heard the men hollering and shouting as they surrounded Enea and the Elf stood up, staggering a little as he pulled his dagger from his side and blocking out the pain and blood dripping from his right arm.

"Hey! Get away from my horse!" He shouted.

"Oh look at that, a little Elf!" One man laughed.

"Aren't you a little too small to be riding one of these?" another mocked his size.

"I was doing pretty well until you jackasses showed up." Gilbert spat with a glare.

"Oh my, that's quite a dirty mouth you have on you." The first man said. "Listen kid, just get lost before we have to hurt you."

"And let you take my horse?" Gilbert said and rolled the sleeve of his shirt up. Suddenly his hand and uninjured arm froze over with ice, sharp points slanting upwards. "I don't think so."

The men gave some strange looks to the Elf and whispered amongst themselves. They seemed a bit alarmed by the strange ice that had just formed on the man's arm.

"Are you sure, Elf? Your arm looks pretty messed up." One man grinned.

"Did I stutter? I'm not leaving without my horse."

The man sighed with a grin, "All right, suit yourself." He said and turned away, he patted the shoulder of the man next to him, "Just rough him up a bit, don't kill him." He said just loud enough for Gilbert to hear and then walked behind the others mounted Enea.

The 4 other men charged at Gilbert, and he didn't feel as confident as he was before. He threw his hand out and covered the ground in front of him with his ice, causing some of the men to slip. He ran and kept looking over his shoulder, but something made his heart suddenly slow: the sound of horseshoes hitting stone. He looked behind him and the man with the rope was chasing him down.

Gilbert dismissed his ice from before and started throwing shards of ice at the man following him, none of them hit. The man was laughing almost maniacally and suddenly he threw two ropes at Gilbert, one wrapped around his legs and the other around his chest and locked his arms against his body. He fell over, grunting in pain as he landed on his arm again. The man walked to him and stood over him before leaning down.

"You're too pretty to be fighting like this." He said and slid a finger under Gilbert's chin to make him look at him. "Hmm, I hear Elves are really feisty in bed, you look like you'd be loads of fun." He grinned.

Gilbert felt his cheeks warm up in embarrassment at the implication and he suddenly threw his head forward, knocking his forehead right into the others. He tried to move away but all he could do was roll a few feet in a sad attempt to escape.

"Why you little..." the man growled and then grabbed onto the Elf and then straddled him. "I'll teach you what you are, Elf!" he yelled and pushed Gilbert's shirt up so he could untie Gilbert's pants. Gilbert let out a gasp and struggled, but he couldn't move much at all. The man on him was heavy and his arms and legs were pinned to him, and his bow was digging painfully into his back.

Gilbert squeezed his eyes shut and suddenly the man let out a yelp and Gilbert felt the weight of the man move off of him. He opened his eyes to a relieving sight.

"You're always causing trouble, aren't you?" it was Ivan, standing over him with his blade in one hand. Gilbert was too frightened and in shock to react, but he was extremely thankful that Ivan had followed him.

Gilbert's attacker looked at the Russian and grinned. "So, are you the one fucking the little Elf?" He asked with a small laugh and rubbed his forehead. "Well, I don't have enough energy to fight you and my friends have left without me so I think I'll be off as well." He said and mounted his horse, "It's been fun, Elf~" he said as he rode away.

Ivan sighed and knelt down to untie the ropes around Gilbert's legs. "I knew you would get yourself into trouble." he said. He untied the ropes from Gilbert's upper body and threw them aside, and just as he was about to speak again, the Elf suddenly threw himself at Ivan, hugging around his neck tightly, and Ivan noticed that his body was beginning to shake.

"Gilbert?" Ivan asked with concern, no longer caring about proving the albino wrong.

"He tried to- he was going to-" he mumbled incoherently and tightened his arms around the Russian and buried his face into Ivan's scarf.

Ivan's eyes widened a little then he carefully placed his hands on Gilbert's back and rubbed gently. "It's all right, you're safe now." He didn't realize what the man had tried to do to Gilbert; he thought he was just trying to mug him.

The Russian held the other there for a while, waiting for the scared Elf to calm down a little. After a few minutes, Gilbert stopped shaking and pulled back from Ivan a little, letting his head hang down in what seemed like shame.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to cling to you like that..." he apologized, thinking that he was probably making the other uncomfortable or annoying him.

Ivan smiled weakly with a sigh and placed his hand on Gilbert's head, "You're fine, you don't need to apologize." He said, smiling. "We should get you back to camp and look at your arm before it gets infected." He carefully stood up. He held Gilbert's hands just in case the albino was still a bit shaken up or was hurt. The Elf wobbled a little but managed to keep his balance, and Ivan cautiously let go of his hands.

As Gilbert properly tied his pants the Russian whistled for Riverwind, who was off to the side in the woods. The horse trotted over obediently and Ivan mounted her quickly. Once up, he turned back to Gilbert and held out his hand.

"Grab on and I'll pull you up." He said. Gilbert paused for a moment before reaching up with his left hand. Ivan gripped onto his tightly and waited for when Gilbert would try to jump.

Gilbert did and Ivan, quite easily, lifted him up, and he sat himself on the small area behind Ivan. Gilbert's other hand immediately clenched onto the Russian's sleeve to keep from falling off the other side.

"You okay?" Ivan asked as he let go of Gilbert's hand.

"Yeah." The albino nodded. He tried to scoot himself back a little, not liking how his crotch was nearly pressing into the other's back.

"You might want to hold onto me." Ivan said and whipped his reins lightly and Riverwind began to walk, and Ivan steered her back toward the forest.

Gilbert scoffed a little and turned his head, "I'll be fine." He assured the other.

"Suit yourself." Ivan grinned slightly and whipped his reins a little harder and Riverwind began to run through the forest. Gilbert was fine up until the horse jumped over a fallen tree and his body shifted and he nearly fell from the horse, but his hands instinctively reached out and gripped onto Ivan tightly. He even pulled himself closer to the other and leaned his forehead against the Russian's back and let out a relieved sigh. Ivan's lips pulled up into an 'I warned you' type of grin and he kept on riding.

The Elf began to think about how he told Ivan not to follow him but he did and ended up saving him. '_You idiot..._' he thought to himself and closed his eyes. '_Thank you..._'

Ivan was a bit surprised when he felt Gilbert's arms suddenly snake around his belly and tighten. The feeling made Ivan smile, though he didn't let the action create any ideas in his head. He just told himself that Gilbert was still a bit scared from being assaulted, or that he was just keeping himself from falling and that was it.

The ride back was silent, neither of them wanted to break the silence nor did they have anything to break the silence with. Soon they reached their little camp and Ivan slid himself off his horse, being careful not to harm Gilbert in the process. He held his hand out again for Gilbert and the albino took it rather quickly, letting Ivan help him down.

Gilbert sat down by the charred wood that was previously their fire and Ivan brought out the bandages and healing items. As Ivan prepared what he needed, he glanced over at Gilbert and noticed a terribly hurt look on his face. He could tell that Gilbert was biting the inside of his bottom lip by the way his lip looked.

The Russian moved closer to the smaller man and carefully lifted his arm, pushing the bloodied and ragged sleeve of his sweater up so he could see the scrape on his arm. Gilbert didn't move an inch, but as Ivan cleaned the wound he would look to the other. The hurt look he had didn't fade and only seemed to get worse, and then Ivan saw something. Gilbert's eyes were glazing over with tears and his lip was starting to tremble.

"Gilbert? Am I hurting you?" Ivan asked and stopped cleaning the albino's wound, just in case.

"What? N-No." Gilbert stuttered and turned his head.

"You're crying." The Russian stated and began wrapping Gilbert's arm in a bandage.

Gilbert tensed up and Ivan could feel it. "I'm... not crying." He said, his voice breaking ever-so-slightly, evidence that he was on the verge of choking up.

"Talk to me." Ivan requested simply, hoping the other would actually talk.

Gilbert stayed silent for a moment, thinking, but then spoke. "I lost Enea..." he said and wheezed slightly as he tried to hold back his tears. He wanted to cry, a lot.

"It's not your fault, Gilbert, and I'm sure she'll be fine, we'll get her back." Ivan tried to reassure him.

The Russian's words annoyed him and he suddenly ripped his arm away from Ivan. "She's probably going to be slaughtered for meat..." he mumbled. "We don't know where they went, and we're too far behind them..." he said.

Ivan sighed and stood up. "There's only one city in the direction they were heading and it's the city our job is in. If they're planning on selling her for anything, they'll be there." He said and extended his hand to the other. "If we hurry, we may be able to find her." He said with a smile.

Gilbert stared up at Ivan for a moment. He wanted to believe his words but his guilt for losing Enea was practically eating him alive. Nevertheless, he gave in and allowed Ivan to help him up.

.

After gathering their bags and materials again, Gilbert found himself sitting behind Ivan on his horse again and galloping fast down the road. Gilbert had his arms tightly around Ivan's belly since he felt like he was going to fall off if he didn't, but he also just felt safer and more content holding onto the other. It didn't bother Ivan but he found himself enjoying the feeling a little too much. He really liked having Gilbert wrapped around him like this.

Was it wrong of him to enjoy the feeling? He told himself before that it was but he couldn't give any good reason for it. The only reason he could come up with was 'because it's him'. And that just didn't make sense to him anymore. He figured that his hatred from years ago for the man who nearly killed him was fading, and it also didn't help that Gilbert is attractive. His unusual looks made him seem so otherworldly but also very... desirable.

It hit him like a brick. His earlier thoughts of how he just liked Gilbert's appearance were dead wrong. The feeling of having Gilbert's arms wrapped around him, his legs pressed against his, him sitting right against him. They were all things that he really liked, and it could be anyone there but because he knew that it's Gilbert, he really liked the feeling, not just because Gilbert was attractive but because... well, he didn't know why.

.

Ivan steered Riverwind down the road which split between two tall hills that spanned out into huge snowy mountains in the distance. One could see snow further along the path that led up into the mountains, and the town they were headed to could be seen atop one of the hills. Gilbert seemed to be in awe at the view he was given. He had never been to the mountains before, and actually, he had never seen snow before. When he was going to school with Ivan, they were always in much warmer climates where it never snowed. The air here was so much more crisp and clean; it made breathing a lot easier. It was colder, of course, but the cold didn't bother him too much yet since he had the warm body in front of him that he was still holding onto tightly.

As the two passed further into the mountains, snow flurries began to fall from the sky. Gilbert let one hand off of Ivan to try and catch one. The Russian noticed Gilbert's movement and he glanced over his shoulder at the albino, trusting Riverwind to stay on the road.

Ivan caught Gilbert staring at a small snowflake in his pale palm. The man seemed to be in complete wonderment by the little flake. His lips were just slightly pulling up into a little smile and his eyes were soft. Ivan noticed after a moment that the snowflake wasn't melting.

"Are you using magic to keep it from melting?" Ivan asked.

His voice made Gilbert lose his trance and he looked up at the other almost confusedly. After a moment of realizing that Ivan had probably been watching him for a while, he nodded silently and looked back at the flake in his hand.

"I thought you didn't use your magic for trivial things?" The Russian asked another question.

Gilbert let his other hand slip from Ivan's waist and he brought it up to the flake in his hand. He carefully touched the edges of it and the flake grew in the direction of his finger. His face was stiff and seemingly emotionless, almost like he was sad.

"This isn't trivial..." he mumbled.

The flake melted into a small puddle and Gilbert kept staring. Ivan continued to watch him curiously and then sighed. "Hold onto me, we need to hurry." He said.

Gilbert did as he was told and tightened his arms around Ivan's belly again, but actually moved himself closer to the man in front of him and rested his cheek against his back, and closed his eyes gently. Ivan felt his face suddenly become warm at the feeling, it didn't feel like Gilbert was holding onto him, but rather like he was hugging him, and Ivan thought the warmth felt nice.

Soon the two were deep into the mountains and trotting slowly through the streets. The city was much larger than it looked from a distance and Gilbert found himself looking at everything that they passed. It was all right since everyone looked at the two men as they went by, so Gilbert wasn't bothered by the stares. Gilbert seemed excited, and Ivan could feel the other when he moved, turning his body from side to side to look around him.

"You really don't get out much, do you?" Ivan asked. His lips pulled up into a small grin, clearly amused with how excited the albino was.

Gilbert chuckled, "Not at all. I've never seen a city like this." He said as he gazed up at the taller buildings that were made of a dark wood and bluish white stone.

"What was your home like?"

"Um... listen, I just want to find Enea, okay? After we find her I'll tell you about where I lived before." He said, trying to get out of talking about his home, at least for now.

"Fair enough."

.

The two trotted around the city for what seemed like forever with no sign of Enea. They asked several shop keepers and inn proprietors if they had seen the horse but had no luck. Their search led them to the back of the city where it was even colder and snowing more.

Gilbert was clearly freezing considering how he was clinging onto Ivan and his body was shaking with chills Ivan could feel the albino's fingers digging into the fabric of his robe and poking his belly.

Ivan suddenly pulled Riverwind off to the side and pulled her to a stop by the front of an inn. He then grabbed onto Gilbert's hands and he could feel how cold the Elf was and he felt bad for him. Gilbert pulled back a little when his hands were touched, surprised by it, but he was more surprised by how incredibly warm Ivan's hands were. He found himself leaning into Ivan more, trying to get more of the warmth that seemed to be emitting from the other, though he could still feel the cold nipping at his ears.

After a few moments, Ivan removed Gilbert's hands from his body and moved to carefully get off of his horse. Gilbert gave him a questioning look.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"We're going to rent a room here and let you warm up for a bit, and then we'll head back out and look for Enea."

Gilbert seemed appalled by the others suggestion. "What? No! She could be hurt or about to be killed. I'm not going to let her die!"

"And _I'm_ not going to let _you_ get frostbite." He said sternly, "Now give me your hand." he commanded and extended one of his to the Elf.

Gilbert sighed, feeling every bit of himself going against this idea but he complied, knowing that if he refused, Ivan would just carry him inside or something.

He lifted his leg from one side of the horse but he lost his balance and his body slid off the saddle. Ivan swiftly moved forward and caught the other, his hands gripping tight onto the albino's body, one holding onto his side under his arm and the other going around his lower back. Gilbert grunted as his body slammed into the taller man's, and he groaned a bit before he looked up to question the other about why he was holding him like he was, but his face was extremely close to the Russian's and he instantly blushed a light pink from the closeness, his words got lost in those purple irises. Ivan smiled a little and, as much as he wanted to just stand there and hold the shivering Elf, he moved to the side but kept one arm around the other and began walking.

Just as Ivan was about to enter the inn, he heard a neigh. He looked back at Riverwind but heard the neigh again, it wasn't her. So, curiously with a bit of hope, he began walking away in what he thought was the direction he heard the sound, Gilbert was pulled along with him and they walked around the corner of the building.

Both men gasped a little when they saw that Enea was right there, and she neighed happily and tried to move but she was tied to one of the posts nearby. Gilbert's face lit up, but then suddenly an older man came into view and he tried to calm the horse.

"H-Hey!" Gilbert shouted at the man, who then looked over at the two men strangely. "Where did you get that horse?" he asked.

The man raised an eyebrow. "I bought her off some strange folk who rode through here a bit ago." He said.

"This is my horse. Her name is Enea; she was stolen from me by those guys who sold her to you." Gilbert said and walked over to the man. Enea neighed and instantly nuzzled her snout into Gilbert's head.

"She does seem to like you..." the man mumbled. "Sorry son, but I can't do anything. I paid 200 coins for her; I can't just give her away on some stranger's word."

Gilbert sighed and suddenly pulled his dagger from its sheath. The man backed up and looked rather scared of it.

Ivan's eyes widened, "Gilbert what are you-"

"The hilt of this dagger is made of a very rare material. Find the right buyer and you'll easily make twice as much as you paid for this horse." He said and expertly spun the blade around and pointed the smooth white hilt toward the man. "Just give me my horse back."

The man eyed the dagger curiously and then took it into his hand. "Fine, but if I find that you're lyin' about this blade then I'll hunt you down, Elf." The man said, but he had a tone of humor in his voice.

Gilbert smiled a little, even though he was annoyed with how he was called 'Elf'. The man bowed his head a little and walked away. Gilbert suddenly hugged Enea and he actually started tearing up a little and whispered to her "I'm sorry" and "I'll never lose you again" between his sniffles.

After a moment of watching him, Ivan came up behind Gilbert and placed his hands on his shoulders. He could feel Gilbert shivering again. "We'll go inside and rest for a little bit, then we'll go to the hall to take our job, okay?" he asked, looking down at the other male.

Gilbert nodded, his lips feeling too cold to move now. Ivan smiled and took Gilbert under his arm again in a small attempt to warm him a little. Gilbert didn't care and he actually nuzzled his body right against the other. He was too cold to care that he was clinging to the Russian.

.

Inside the inn and after Ivan had paid for their room, Gilbert was lying on one of the beds in the room, alone. Ivan was downstairs; said he wanted to talk to some locals and get some food before he came up to the room.

Gilbert stared up at the wooden planked ceiling. He was relieved about Enea, of course, but something else held his thoughts now.

'_My heart skipped a beat._' He thought. He pressed his palm to his chest and felt his heart beating normally. When he looked up at Ivan outside the inn, his heart fluttered and his cheeks warmed up. He wasn't disgusted or freaked out by it, but rather he was baffled by the fact that he liked it. Ivan was warm, and that smile he had when he looked down at him matched that warmth. How he even so willingly let Ivan hug around him when they walked into the inn, he wasn't even bothered by the stares of the people inside.

He couldn't get it out of his mind and that's what bothered him so much. He had never looked at the other in a way that made his stomach fill with butterflies or made the blood rush to his cheeks, but suddenly that smile and those shining violet eyes were all he could think about and picture when he closed his eyes.

He thought that at first, Ivan was just being nice out of sympathy since Gilbert wasn't used to the life outside his palace, but that should have ended long ago and Ivan didn't even know about that. The two had fought for the first two weeks after being reunited but then the day they set out from the College, Ivan was nicer. He was still a bit rude, but then something happened and Ivan was suddenly almost fond of him, like he... liked him.

The thought of Ivan liking him made his face warm up for a reason he didn't understand. There was a weird feeling in his chest and he found himself liking it a little.

Just before he could go deeper into his thoughts, the door to the room opened and Ivan walked in with a tray of food. Gilbert instantly sat up and went stiff as the other entered and closed the door.

He almost felt nervous now that he had the idea of Ivan liking him in his head, but also the fear of wondering what the Russian wanted from him. Gilbert never believed men to like him for anything other than his body. He didn't believe that Ivan had any reason to like him after all the crap he's put him through.

Besides, there was another thing bothering him...

"Are you finally getting warmed up?" Ivan asked as he set the tray of wood on a small table between the beds.

Gilbert nodded weakly and watched the other as he walked around the room. Ivan removed his robe and sat on the bed and then got ready to eat. Just as he was about to take a bite of some meat, he glanced over at Gilbert, who was sitting on the bed opposite of him with his legs draped over the sides, seeming to be frozen stiff.

"Gilbert?" he inquired and the Elf was knocked from a trance.

"Sorry... I was just thinking." He said and looked down to the floor.

"About what?"

"Home." The word came out in an exhale. "For some reason this place reminds me of home. I think it might be the cold, or how dark it is..." he trailed off and then shifted his pink orbs to the other, "You wanted to know about the city, right?" Ivan gave a nod. "It's a walled-in city. Not many people left unless they were traders or travelers." He said. "I told you that I stayed inside most of the time; going to school with you was my first glimpse of the outside world. Well, outside of my town that is. It's very dark and cold all the time, and the walls are so high that no light can get in..." he said.

Ivan figured it was an exaggeration that no light could get in, but he smiled and was happy about Gilbert telling him more. "I was curious about you." He said and when Gilbert's eyes widened in confusion, he let out a small laugh, "Roderich said that you're from a Sector that not many are familiar with, so I've been a little curious about you. Plus when you told me about your special magic I've just been interested in knowing more."

Ivan went on for a few more seconds while Gilbert stayed silent, talking about other things he was interested in about the other and his people, but Gilbert felt a strange type of irritation and a tension that only he felt and he suddenly blurted out.

"Do you like me?" he interrupted the other in mid-rant, and Ivan let out a small gasp and locked his eyes onto the other. Gilbert's own eyes were full of curiosity and even a bit of fear. Ivan could detect some determination in them as well.

"Excuse me...?" Ivan nearly stuttered and he could feel his heart beating a little faster now.

Gilbert blinked slowly before repeating himself clearly.

"Do you like me, Ivan?"

* * *

Ooh, cliffhanger. What will Ivan say to Gilbert? Will they confess something or just brush it off? We shall wait and see...

**Author's Notes:**  
•I was originally going to have Gilbert lose Enea for good in this chapter, but then I figured that since I have something else sad planned for this story, I wasn't going to do that.

—

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	7. Maybe Just a Little

**[Originally posted: 10/6/2013]**

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Soft-core yaoi, fighting, character injury, blood, language.**

* * *

The Russian sat there staring at the other, not sure how he was supposed to answer. Like? Like in what way? Ivan thought the best way to answer would be to just say 'yes' and tell the truth, but nothing came out. Nothing at all. His eyes were wide and his mouth hung open slightly like words were dancing on his tongue, but still, silence filled the room.

Gilbert waited and waited, not looking away from the others face. He felt a rising sense of fear from the silence, and suddenly every ounce of his being was hoping that Ivan's answer would be 'no.'

Ivan nervously looked to the side and rubbed at his neck, which Gilbert took as a bad sign. "I... can't fully deny that." He finally said and Gilbert leaned back a little and took in a shaky breath. "I guess, lately, I've thought that you were a little attractive." He wanted to tell Gilbert how incredibly attractive he found him, but he could sense how uncomfortable the other was.

And uncomfortable he was, indeed. Gilbert couldn't do anything but stare at the other, he wasn't even thinking. Just stunned and trying to comprehend.

"Gilbert, please say something."

"What do you want from me?" Gilbert asked.

"What?"

"People don't just _like_ me, not unless they want money or my body." He said, "What do you want from me?" he repeated. He shifted his body and moved backward a little onto the bed.

Ivan sighed heavily and closed his eyes, "I don't want anything from you, Gilbert. I was hoping I could keep this all a secret, but I guess I don't hide it very well." Gilbert kept silent, cautiously watching the other through some stray strands of white hair that were falling into his face. "I don't want you to be uncomfortable now, but you _did_ ask me; you had to have a suspicion about it."

"Yeah, and that's _why_ I asked." Gilbert growled, "You've been acting weird ever since the night you saw me in the water and it's starting to freak me out!" his voice was getting louder, clearly losing his rationality.

"Why is it freaking you out?"

"Because I like you too!" he blurted out honestly without realizing, and when he did he stuttered over himself to try to cover it. Meanwhile, Ivan's eyes were so wide that they looked like they were going to bulge right out of his head. "I-I mean... at least, I _think_ I do. But... that's not the reason why I'm freaked out..." he mumbled, not being able to look at the other.

'_He's so cute..._' Ivan thought as a repressed smile threatened to form on his lips. It was now so incredibly obvious to him that Gilbert had a little thing for him too. He stood up and walked over to the Elf, who scooted back more onto his bed in sync with the other as he neared him. "Tell me why it freaks you out." he requested.

Gilbert ignored the Russian's wish at first, until Ivan said his name. "You said you're just attracted to me physically right? It's weird knowing that someone could be lusting after my body."

Ivan almost laughed. "Lusting? Gilbert I'm not trying to sleep with you, and I _can_ control myself, y'know." He said, "Listen, it's true that I find you attractive, and I'm not even going to try to deny that, but lately... your personality has been growing on me too." He said. His words caused Gilbert to look up at him. Ivan was smiling down at him, that warm, comforting smile that he liked so much. Gilbert couldn't look away. Ivan moved a little closer to the bed and brought his hand up. Gilbert twitched when the Russian's fingers touched his cheek. He kept still, looking as if he felt threatened.

"I don't want you to be scared of me..." Ivan said in a near whisper, his eyes narrowed in sadness at how fearful the Elf looked. He wanted to know why Gilbert was so afraid. He cupped Gilbert's cheek fully and the albino leaned his face into his palm. The action confused Ivan but he liked it too much to care about the reason. Gilbert's eyes had slid shut and he looked more calm. Ivan leaned down a little and brushed some white hair behind a pointed ear, noticing how the albino shivered ever-so-slightly as his finger grazed the skin. He liked that too.

"You like it, right?" Ivan asked, and Gilbert opened his eyes, looking at him curiously. "This feeling, me touching you." Gilbert shifted his eyes away before closing them again and leaned into Ivan's hand, his cheeks a pale pink. Ivan smiled, having been given the answer he wanted. He leaned down and pressed his lips to Gilbert's forehead.

At that point Gilbert pulled back and grabbed onto Ivan's wrist. "No. I can't..." he said.

"Can't what?" Ivan asked, looking a bit annoyed that Gilbert had stopped him.

"It's... hard to explain, but I don't want this feeling to get stronger." He said.

"... so... you don't want to like me even though you already do?"

"It's more complicated than that... I can't tell you."

Ivan growled and pulled his arm from Gilbert's grasp. "That's hardly fair, don't you think?" he asked. "It's selfish that you won't give me a good reason why you won't let me touch you, or why you won't let yourself enjoy it even though you know you do."

Gilbert forced a chuckle, "It _is_ selfish, and maybe one day I'll tell you why it is, but not today." He said. "Today... we have a job, remember?"

"Will you talk to me more after the job's done?"

"No. Er... maybe. I need time to think first." He said and stood up, moving away from the Russian. "You just... don't touch me anymore." He said and left the room. Simple as that.

Ivan spent a few seconds staring at the door that Gilbert had just left through, and he groaned in annoyance and plopped himself down on his bed. He didn't understand why Gilbert refused something that he admitted he enjoyed. What reason could he have for not wanting to take things further when they both so obviously felt something?

He thought about it for a while but eventually became annoyed. He just wanted an answer, and he thought about forcing one out of Gilbert, but he realized that would be a perfect way to make the Elf even _more_ scared of him. Was Gilbert just scared of liking someone, or maybe had a fear of doing more intimate things? It wasn't like Ivan was _actually_ lusting after him, which was obviously a thought that Gilbert had, though he did suddenly start wondering how the albino was in bed...

No no, that's dangerous territory. For now he'll just comply with Gilbert's wish and not touch him, let the albino think and hopefully in the end, if everything works in his favor, Ivan will be touching and kissing all over the little Elf.

.

Gilbert had gone outside, and Ivan saw him through the window of the inn and watched him for a moment before going out. The Elf was feeding Enea some food and petting her. He was smiling happily again, and it pained Ivan that he caused that smile to go away. He joined Gilbert outside and the albino turned when he heard the door of the inn open. Gilbert's expression changed to one that seemed to lack emotion.

"Are you ready to go?" Ivan asked in an attempt to push passed the awkwardness that he felt.

"Yeah." Gilbert replied simply and mounted Enea. He sighed, taking a moment to appreciate the creature under him.

Ivan didn't say another word and he walked to his own horse, mounted her and waited for Gilbert to join him. As the two trotted down the roads heading for the Hall in silence, Ivan was beginning to miss sharing a horse with Gilbert. He was glad that they were able to find Enea, and so easily as well, but he liked that closeness he felt with Gilbert, that warmth, the feeling of another wrapped around him. It felt _real_, not like the flings he had told Gilbert about. He didn't even think about the possibility that maybe Gilbert was put-off by the fact that Ivan had slept with strangers because he was either drunk or lonely, or both. That couldn't be the reason he didn't want Ivan to touch him... could it?

The two pulled up to a fancy looking and heavily guarded building and got off of their horses. Ivan walked to the other and looked down at him. "How's your arm?" he asked.

"It's fine." Gilbert answered. The Russian could tell that the Elf was trying to keep their conversations short, but he wouldn't allow himself to be completely ignored. When Gilbert turned to walk toward the entrance of the Hall, Ivan grabbed onto his shoulder. Gilbert wobbled on his feet and he looked over his shoulder. "What are you doing?" he asked, looking a bit irritated.

"You're being rude. You're making me feel guilty for something I can't control and something that you wanted to know." He said and let go of Gilbert.

The Elf froze in his own guilt for a moment before sighing and looking away. "I'm sorry... I just, _really_ don't want to talk about this right now, okay?"

"That's fine," He said and then took Gilbert's chin between his thumb and index finger and made him look at him, "but promise me you will talk eventually?" he requested.

Gilbert could see it in the Russian's eyes that he desperately wanted to know what was going on, but Gilbert couldn't tell him yet, it was too soon for him to even be certain himself. He felt his cheeks warm up a little and he pouted his bottom lip out slightly. "What did I say about touching?" he said.

Ivan waited a second before he let his hand drop, almost like he was trying to savor the short moment that he had to touch Gilbert's skin. "Sorry."

Gilbert saw the other's face drop and he gave a nervous smile and patted the Russian's arm. "C'mon, we have a job to do." He said and gripped onto Ivan's sleeve and pulled him toward the building. Ivan couldn't do much aside from stumble to walk and wonder just what the albino was doing. Though he did appreciate the albino showing some emotion other than fear or just flat out ignoring him.

Inside the Hall there were more guards walking around, some local nobles sitting at a large table in the middle of the big room eating, and then there was the Count who sat upon his throne, clothed in the nicest and warmest fabrics available. The two men walked side-by-side up to him. Gilbert let Ivan speak since he was better at speaking to nobles, considering Gilbert was royalty, he didn't exactly know proper etiquette toward another noble. He didn't really even know proper etiquette to begin with.

The Count looked at the two men standing in front of him and before Ivan could even begin speaking, the man leaned forward in his chair and spoke first. "Are you the two from Torchlight?" he asked. Ivan looked a bit surprised and glanced to Gilbert beside him before nodding to the Count. "I received a letter late last night saying that you would be arriving soon. You two have your hands full with jobs, I hear." The man chuckled, and the two smiled a bit nervously, not really sure if laughing or smiling was a proper thing to do in this situation. "Let's get down to business and fill you in on your job, shall we?" the man said with a smile.

The Count explained to them that the cave the Gremlins had taken over is an old mining cave that he wants to put back into business, but cannot because he's already lost nearly a dozen men to the creatures inside. His people don't know much of magic or the ways of the dark creatures of this world, so he called to the College for help. He explained that the cave is about an hour carriage ride to the northeast, he would provide a paid trip to and from the cave, but they will have no assistance inside; that is why he hired them after all. After they return they will have a doctor tend to any injuries they may have, as well as a paid room at the city's finest inn for the night.

After being briefed of their job, the two were escorted out of the Hall by two guards. Gilbert felt uncomfortable, he felt like he was back home where he was usually always followed by guards until he told them to leave. He found himself getting lost in his thoughts and his feet began to walk in a path that wasn't straight, and he eventually bumped arms with Ivan. It was his right arm, and the contact made his skin sting.

"Are you all right?" Ivan asked quietly, leaning in toward the other a little.

"Yeah... my arm is still sore though." The Elf replied and held his wound with his hand, almost like he was trying to push the pain back into his arm, but it only made him feel a dull pain.

"I thought you said it was fine..." Ivan sighed.

"Yeah well I lied." Gilbert snapped a little.

"Can you even use your bow? How do you plan on pulling arrows back with an injured arm?" Ivan asked.

"I can do other things, like use magic. I'm better with a bow but I'll have you there to help."

Ivan sighed again, irritated that Gilbert lied to him. If he would have told him his arm still hurt, he would have brought some medicine with them so he could try to ease the wound, or even wait another day to go to the cave.

Soon the group was outside of the city and standing by a carriage with a white cloth top covering. Gilbert went wide-eyed when he saw the horses that were attached to the carriage. They were huge, even bigger than Enea and Riverwind. The horses were built for pulling and living in colder climates. Seems like everything that grew up in the cold was bigger or stronger. Except for Gilbert.

One of the guards looked to Ivan. "The driver will take you close to the cave. You'll go in and kill the creatures and return to the city. If you're not back by nightfall, we'll assume you're dead."

Ivan gave the man a small glare, "And if we _are_ dead?"

"Then the cave will be your grave."

His glare sharpened and he turned to Gilbert, who looked a little nauseous from what the man had said. Ivan held onto Gilbert's shoulders and actually pushed him toward the carriage. "Let's go." He said.

Gilbert climbed into the back of the carriage, Ivan following close behind. Inside the carriage was small and a rather tight fit and the two men sat side-by-side against the wooden wall, their weapons lying in the space in front of them.

The driver peeked back into the carriage, "You two ready?" Ivan looked to him and nodded and the man went back and whipped the reins. The carriage jolted forward as the horses began to move and it caused Gilbert to bump into Ivan again. It wasn't his bad arm so he didn't make a scene and just scooted away a little. Ivan wanted Gilbert to stay closer to him but he knew that he wasn't supposed to touch the other.

After about 15 minutes into the trip, Gilbert had pulled his legs to his chest and hid his hands behind his legs. There was a heavy fur blanket in the carriage for them to use and Gilbert was taking full advantage of it. Ivan glanced down to him and noticed that he was shivering almost violently. "Are you cold?" Ivan asked already knowing the answer.

"A l-little..." Gilbert's teeth clattered together and he retracted his limbs as close to himself as he could. "It's j-just my hands..."

Ivan smiled slightly and turned his body a little toward the other. He held his hands up and suddenly two small flames sparked in his palms. Gilbert looked at the other curiously.

"Warm your hands on my fire." Ivan said and moved his hands together at the wrists to make one combined flame. Gilbert slowly brought his hands closer to the small fire and instantly felt the pleasure of warmth tickle his skin. He sighed and rubbed his hands together to create more heat before opening his hands to the flame again.

Ivan sat there silently as he watched the Elf. This small of a flame would hardly exhaust him of any magic, and it was worth it to see the look on Gilbert's face right now. The flame was causing a soft orangey color to wash over his face and it caused his pink eyes to shine brightly. The traces of blue in Gilbert's eyes stood out and gleamed beautifully as well. His skin glowed and Ivan's desire to touch him grew stronger, but he repressed it as best as he could.

After a while, Gilbert pulled his hands back and sighed, leaning backward against the wood of the carriage. "Thanks, that helped a lot." He said, looking toward Ivan with a smile.

"No problem." Ivan said, dismissing his flame in the blink of an eye. "Tell me if you need me to warm you up again." He said. There was some hidden innuendo in his words but it went unnoticed by the Elf, who simply nodded and covered himself with the blanket again.

Silence took the two again and it eventually began eating away at Ivan's patience. He searched his mind for anything, any topic to bring up. Anything would do, but he couldn't even think about speaking, he just wanted to wrap his arm around the other and hold him tight in case he got cold again. In the midst of imagining Gilbert snuggled warmly against him, he felt something on his shoulder. He looked and saw white. Gilbert was leaning his head against his arm. Feeling curious, he leaned down a little to see the albino's face and discovered that the Elf had fallen asleep. White lashes resting gently against his cheeks and his lips were just barely closed. He looked adorable. Ivan guessed that Gilbert was a bit tired from a rough night of sleeping on the ground and then fighting with those bandits, and then being emotional from assault and losing Enea. The Elf was probably exhausted. They still had about 30 minutes left of the carriage ride so Ivan would let him sleep until then. However, this didn't count as touching him, right? Ivan wondered about that, but he ignored it because he honestly didn't care, the Elf _was_ asleep after all. He carefully rested his head atop Gilbert's own and closed his eyes.

Time went by without him even knowing it and soon a voice began to wake him. "Excuse me, sir." Ivan heard and he grunted softly. He blinked a few times and then realized that he himself had nodded off for a few minutes, and the driver was peeking back into the carriage and looking at them. "We're at the cave." He said.

Ivan gave a nod and yawned. he then looked to Gilbert and began shaking him gently in an attempt to wake the sleeping albino.

Gilbert grumbled in his sleep and nuzzled his head into the Russian's arm, mumbling out a soft and defiant "No...", like all he wanted to do was sleep.

Ivan thought it was cute and like it should be a crime to wake such innocence, but they needed to get going. "Gilbert, Gilbert wake up." He said, shaking the other a bit rougher.

"Uuhnn..." the annoyed sound came from Gilbert as he shifted his body. He opened his eyes and blinked them a few times. "What's happening?" he said drowsily.

Ivan held back a grin at the sheer cuteness that Gilbert was. "We're at the cave."

"Oh..." Gilbert said, and then he realized what Ivan said. "Oh." He then noticed how he was leaning onto Ivan and he quickly sat himself up. "Sorry about that." He apologized.

"It's all right, you seemed tired." Ivan said and gathered his sword in one hand. "Just make sure you're awake. Gremlins may be small but they attack in numbers and can easily take down much larger creatures."

Gilbert nodded in understanding and grabbed his bow and bag from the floor. He crawled to the end of the carriage and jumped out. His boots crunching into the snow below him. He stood and attached his bow to his back and lifted the hood of his cloak. Ivan followed out behind him, and attached his sword to his side and walked with Gilbert to the front of the carriage.

"The cave is a few minutes' walk in that direction." The man said and pointed to an opening between some snow-covered trees. "I can't get you any closer because of a fallen tree along the road, plus it's just not safe for a civilian such as myself. I'll be back in a few hours to check if you're ready to come back, but if you're not out by nightfall..." he trained off.

"We got it." Ivan said and looked to Gilbert. "Ready?" Gilbert gave a nod.

.

The entrance of the cave was about a 5 minute walk. They came across the fallen tree along the dirt path and jumped over it and continued on. They stood outside of the cave, a howling wind could be heard echoing from inside.

Ivan looked to the other and eyed his arm. "Can you use your bow at all?" he asked.

"Probably not, I can't pull the arrows back enough to shoot, but I can use my magic." He said and rolled his sleeves up. His skin glazed over in ice that seemed to seep out of his very skin. Ivan was curious; until he saw the shards of ice suddenly protrude from the icy flesh of the other. Ivan was sure that his face lost a bit of color from looking at Gilbert's arms.

"Ivan, you okay?" Gilbert asked after a moment.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm fine." He said and then looked around. He picked up a nearby branch that had fallen from a tree and lit the end of it on fire. "Let's go."

They walked quietly into the cave, Ivan leading with the torch. Gilbert glanced around as they descended farther in. The walls were crumbling down and darkness spanned out in front of them. It was unnerving and made Gilbert's heart slow down. He kept close to Ivan, keeping to the side of him and watching over his shoulder just in case.

The two walked for minutes, finding nothing but a long tunnel, Gilbert was just about to complain when he took a step and his foot suddenly dropped out from under him. His yell that echoed off and became distant caught Ivan's attention and he turned around, the albino nowhere to be found.

"Gilbert?" He called out, taking a step forward and then looked to the ground. He noticed that there was a rather large hole in the ground where Gilbert had been walking. The Russian knelt to the hole and looked down through it. "Gilbert!? Are you all right!?"

For a moment there was silence, but then came a very loud, displeased, and possibly pained, "FUCK!" that echoed through the cave.

"Gilbert!" Ivan yelled down again.

The Elf looked up, seeing the fire of Ivan's torch and the Russian himself through the hole above him. "I can see you. I'm all right, I just twisted my ankle a little but I think I can walk!"

Ivan sighed in relief, "All right, just stay still and I'll try to find a way down to you."

"Why not just come down through the hole?" Gilbert asked.

"And injure my leg too? No. Just stay put." Ivan said.

Gilbert felt his heart beat even slower when the light above him disappeared. It was dark, he couldn't see a thing and he hated it. Dark and silent was the combination that he hated most. He moved a little and tried to stand but the sudden sharp pain that shot up his leg caused him to collapse onto the ground, small pebbles pressing into the skin of his palm. He bit his lip, feeling utterly useless. He scooted his body back and leaned against the wall. He closed his eyes, figuring that there was no point in keeping them open because it was pitch black down here.

'_I guess I'll just wait for Ivan..._' he thought.

After a minute, he heard some footsteps and his eyes shot open with excitement, but when he looked around and saw no light from Ivan's torch, his chest ached in fear. From what he had researched on Gremlins, they can see extremely well in the dark, which was bad news for him. He pulled his bow into his healthy hand and pushed his back against the wall, moving his good foot against the ground to stand up, leaning on the wall for support. The footsteps multiplied and he could hear sharp scratches against the stones getting closer and closer until something sharp sliced through his boot and cut his leg open. He fell with a pained yelp and his cheek pushed roughly into the ground. Suddenly there were Gremlins crawling onto his back and poking him with sticks with rocks on the ends. He held his breath, hoping it would keep the creatures from attacking more. It worked for a moment, but then he suddenly felt ropes being tied around his arms in a frantic manner.

"What do you think you're DOING!?" his last word was yelled and accompanied by him whipping his arm back. He hit something with his elbow and one of the creatures made a loud shrieking sound. He pulled an arrow from his quiver and whipped it around, hoping to hit some of them. He heard the silver tip slice through something and more screeches filled the air. He tried to lift his upper body, when suddenly more Gremlins began attacking. A few trampled around on his back and kept him from getting up and others held his legs while another tied his hands together in messy tight knots. One or two of them began pulling his hair, their sharp claws cutting and shagging it short. His twisted ankle made it hard for him to move and his other leg had been sliced open on the calf by one of the Gremlins, and he could feel the warmth of blood drenching his leg and seeping into his boot. He stopped struggling, knowing that he probably couldn't walk even if he could get away. The pain was causing his eyes to fill with tears and eventually rolled down his cheeks.

Minutes passed and the Gremlins were still circling him like they were conducting some sort of ritual. Gilbert felt dizzy from the pain that had made his body feel numb and stiff. All he could hear were the weird chattering of the creatures around him and their claws on the stone. It was terrifying, and he took the time to reflect on his journey since leaving home.

He was attacked by Gremlins before, ones much smaller and weaker than these ones but they still injured him and he ended up washed up on the bank of the lake outside of the College, then he passed out after using some magic fighting Beatrice, he fell off Enea the first time he tried to mount her, then he lost Enea and got beaten up by some bandits.

The only useful thing he's done was distract the troll for Ivan.

He felt pathetic and even moreso when he began to cry out of disappointment in himself. He tried to keep his sobs quiet so the Gremlins wouldn't attack him again, but suddenly a loud noise roared through the cave and exploded further down. Gilbert opened his eyes and was shocked when light from fire filled them. He saw the many Gremlins around and he gasped right before another large fireball soared passed him and knocked a few of the Gremlins down.

"Gilbert!" Ivan's voice rang in Gilbert's ears like bells and he couldn't help his lips from turning up into an ecstatic smile.

"Ivan!" he said his name, "Ivan I'm over here!"

The Russian knocked out some more of the Gremlins before walking over to Gilbert. He didn't have time to unsheathe his sword so he burned through the ropes quickly, trying not to burn Gilbert's skin in the process. Once he was free, Gilbert looked to Ivan and the Russian could see how red his eyes were from crying.

"Stay here, all right? I'll take care of the Gremlins and then we'll get you out of here." Ivan said, "Luckily you seemed to fall right where most of them were." He said with a small chuckle.

"Take me with you! I can help!" the Elf pleaded.

"Gilbert you can't even walk. Just stay here and rest until I can safely get you out." Ivan said and dug the torch into the gravel next to Gilbert so he could have light. He walked away, bearing his sword in one hand and his other engulfed in flames.

'_I... I want to help..._' Gilbert thought, biting the inside of his lip.

There were still many Gremlins around Gilbert and since his hands were free, he started throwing shards of ice at the creatures. Ivan had gone further into the cave to try to seek out the remaining Gremlins. After what seemed like hours, however, the last Gremlin let out its final shriek and met its end at Ivan's blade. The Russian sheathed his sword and snuffed out his flame when he returned to the albino. He leaned down to Gilbert and looked him in the eyes. His pink orbs were half-lidded and he looked like he was going to pass out. He looked a mess, covered in dirt and blood.

"I told you to just sit still..." Ivan said as he carefully removed Gilbert's boot from his bleeding leg.

"I just wanted to help for once..." The Elf mumbled.

Ivan sighed, "Stop talking, just let me help you." He said and suddenly removed his scarf from his neck. Pink eyes widened at the sight of several jagged scars on the Russian's skin, but obeying Ivan's order, he remained still and sat quietly.

Ivan wrapped his scarf around Gilbert's leg tightly in an attempt to stop the bleeding, and then carefully took one of Gilbert's arms into his. "Try to get on my back." He said, and Gilbert, with the help of the Russian, stood to his feet. Ivan leaned down and picked Gilbert up by the back of his legs and the albino wrapped his arms around Ivan's neck loosely.

"Are you okay?" Ivan asked.

Gilbert rested his chin on Ivan's shoulder and grunted a little. "I hurt, but I'm alive."

The Russian smiled, "That's all that matters then." And started walking. He carefully held his torch in one hand as he walked, looking for the exit of the cave.

After minutes of walking, the light from the outside filled their vision. Ivan dropped the torch so he could hold onto Gilbert's leg better, and the first place Gilbert's eyes went to was Ivan's neck. Without even thinking, he gently pressed his fingers to the many scars, and the contact made Ivan twitch visibly.

"Gilbert?"

"What, happened to you...?" Gilbert's voice came out sadly.

Ivan sighed softly, realizing that Gilbert probably wouldn't let this go if he dodged the question. "You don't remember?" he felt Gilbert shake his head. "You gave them to me."

"I did?" Gilbert's voice came after a soft gasp.

"I'm not surprised you don't remember, actually. It was the day we graduated, 8 years ago. You and I were going at it again and roughing each other up, no one paid any attention since it'd become a daily occurrence for us back then. It was my fault since I provoked you, but things got violent really quickly. I cut your shoulder with a dagger, which is probably why you have that scar there, and when I did that, you suddenly snapped and started using magic we've never seen you use before. It's like you weren't even there. You tackled me to the ground and started strangling me with your hands covered in ice. It took three professors to get you off of me and they ended up having to knock you out just to get you to calm down." Ivan said.

Gilbert stared at Ivan's neck in shock. He had no memory of this event at all but he believed that he was the one who did it. The shards of ice that appear on his hands were the size of the scars and spaced out the same as well. He buried his face into Ivan's neck, "That's why you hate me so much... not just because of the bullying and teasing, but... I tried to kill you." He said, tightening his grip around the others neck. "I'm sorry, Ivan, I'm so sorry..."

Ivan was about to speak but when he felt something wet on his neck he stopped. He felt Gilbert's body shaking and soft sobs filled his ears. The Russian felt horrible for telling Gilbert what happened, but... it was a good thing that he did, right?

The Russian carefully leaned his head toward Gilbert and nuzzled against his. "It's all right, Gilbert, don't cry."

"All I do is mess up and hurt people... you should have just left me down there to bleed to death."

The Russian's hands gripped tight at the undersides of Gilbert's thighs. "Don't say anything like that ever again; do you hear me, Gilbert Beilschmidt?" Ivan almost growled.

Gilbert narrowed his eyes as they filled with more tears and he buried his head back into Ivan's neck. "Yes, I'm sorry..." he mumbled, and kept silent for the rest of the walk.

Soon Ivan let Gilbert sit on a fallen tree near where the carriage had dropped them off. "The carriage should be here soon, all right?" Ivan said, looking back to Gilbert. The Elf was staring straight forward with a blank expression, tears still flowing down his cheeks from sadness, guilt, and pain. Ivan walked to him and knelt beside him. "Hey." He started and lifted Gilbert's chin, wiping away some falling tears from the smaller male's pale cheek. "Stop crying, everything's all right now."

Gilbert shifted his eyes to the other, "Aren't you mad at me? Don't you want to kill me for what I did?"

Ivan sighed, "If you would've asked me that when you first came here, I would have said yes, but... no, not anymore. I attacked first back then, remember? I drew your blood; you had every right to defend yourself the way you did. It's just taken me 8 years to realize that, and I'm sorry." He said and ran a hand through Gilbert's hair. He noticed that a large portion of hair was a lot shorter than the rest. "Gremlins gave you a haircut, I see." He said, chuckling a little.

"Is it that bad?" Gilbert asked.

"It's really short in the back and it doesn't match. If you want, I could cut it when we get back to the College?" Ivan suggested.

"Great... I didn't want to lose my hair again..." the Elf mumbled.

"Well, if you ask me, I think you'd look better with short hair anyway." Ivan admitted, continuing to play with Gilbert's jagged hair. Gilbert didn't reply and only blushed softly at Ivan's words. Suddenly, he surprisingly found himself feeling okay with cutting his hair short again.

Ivan heard some noise from behind him and he turned his head to see the carriage coming down the dirt path. He turned back to Gilbert and took his arms around his neck. "Time to go." He said, and easily lifted the other onto his back again.

The driver pulled his horses to a stop upon seeing Ivan and Gilbert. He noticed the bloodied cloth around the albino's leg and he swallowed. "There's some bandages in the back of the wagon, I was told to bring them just in case." He said.

"Thank you." Ivan said and went to the back of the carriage. He got close to the back and let Gilbert sit on the edge and then let go of his legs. Gilbert crawled backward into the wagon using his hands and arms and sat against the wall like he had before. Ivan followed him; removing the heap of weapons he was carrying and quickly began unraveling the bandages he was told about.

The driver peaked his head in through the opening again, "There's an ointment in that box that's supposed to stop bleeding; it's the jar with the green ribbon around the handle." He said.

Ivan nodded and got said jar out, picking it from several others. Ivan removed his bloody scarf from Gilbert's leg, the man hissing in pain as he did so, and immediately applied the ointment to the rather deep cut. Gilbert took in shaky breaths and couldn't help the tears from welling at his eyes. It hurt, badly.

"Don't worry; once we get back into town the doctor will clean and fix this up better, all right?" Ivan reassured Gilbert. The albino nodded weakly and didn't say a word, he didn't have the energy to, and he wasn't even sure if words would come out if he tried to speak. Ivan finished wrapping the wound in a bandage and then pulled the blanket from earlier up over Gilbert. He moved to sit next to him. Ivan softly stroked at Gilbert's face, wiping away the pained tears that were lingering on white lashes and gently ran his fingers through some of Gilbert's shagged bangs. Gilbert looked exhausted and like he had gotten his will beaten out of him. His eyes showed how much physical and emotional pain he was in, and it made Ivan's chest ache. He just wanted to soothe the other and make him feel better.

Gilbert wasn't paying attention at all; the soft touch of Ivan's fingers was blissful to him. Finally, something that _didn't_ hurt. However, something suddenly changed. The cold but somehow soothing touch of Ivan's fingers was replaced with one that was warmer, and seemed to send a small burning jolt through his body. He felt hair tickling his cheek, and when he glanced up, he noticed that Ivan's face was so incredibly close to his own. Ivan's lips were on his forehead, though closer to his temple really. Gilbert wasn't sure how long Ivan left his warm lips on his skin, he lost track of time and honestly didn't care. The kiss made him blush slightly and he found himself not caring at all about his 'no touching' rule; and how _could_ he care? Ivan's touch was warm and comforting and distracting from the pain he felt everywhere. Honestly, he just wanted to curl up next to Ivan and sleep for a few days...

Before he knew it, Ivan was carrying the albino in his arms like a man would his bride. He must have nodded off in the carriage, or lost consciousness or something because he didn't even remember being picked up. All he was aware of was his head leaning into Ivan's chest and most of his body tingling with numbness.

Ivan followed two guards to the inn with the half-conscious Elf in his arms. A few people stared strangely at them as they walked through the inn, but Ivan ignored them and carefully carried the other up the stairs. Gilbert heard a guard speak and it sounded like he said something about a doctor being with them shortly, but he wasn't certain. Soon the albino felt his body press onto a soft bed that seemed to make his muscles scream with delight.

"How are you feeling?" Ivan asked, sitting on the bed next to Gilbert.

The Elf looked up at him, his eyes feeling heavy. "I've been better." He forced a chuckle, which hurt.

"You'll feel better soon, the doctor will be here and hopefully they can help you get better." Ivan said.

"I don't need a doctor." Gilbert's voice sounded defiant. "It's just a cut and some bruises, I'll be fine."

"Gremlins often use makeshift poisons on their weapons; do you want to risk being dead in the morning because you're being stubborn?" Ivan asked with a raised eyebrow.

Gilbert pouted a little, "Fine."

.

Soon the doctor came and properly attended to Gilbert's wounds, pouring something with a stomach-turning stench onto the cut on his leg. It stung, but the pain faded and was almost comfortable now. The doctor also instructed him to drink a dark purple liquid, which tasted as bad as it smelled. Apparently the Gremlins here are known for using a type of poisonous berry that grows only in the forest to the northeast, while not deadly at first, after a few days it would have shut down his vital organs and killed him. After being told that, he made a mental note to listen to Ivan more often. The doctor wrapped his leg in bandages and put a sort of cast on his ankle to keep it from moving, as well as wrapping his other arm in bandages as well. Poor guy couldn't move much without feeling weighed down, which was a _terrible_ feeling for Gilbert.

Eventually it was just the two of them in the room, the moonlight shining through the window and the small flickering flames of some candles gave the room a smoky smell, but also a cozy feel. Gilbert glanced over to Ivan, who was now lying on his back on his own bed in his nightwear.

"I suppose you want answers, right?" Gilbert inquired, his voice cracking a little from the dryness of his throat.

Ivan looked over at him, "About what?"

"About what I couldn't tell you earlier?" Ivan sat up and looked at Gilbert, anticipation gleaming in his eyes. Gilbert had to look away, knowing that he was going to let the other down. "I can't tell you everything yet... but, I can't... be with someone." He said.

"What do you mean?" Ivan asked.

"Like... falling in love, I can't do it."

The words sounded strange to Ivan. "Why not?"

Gilbert sighed into a small growl, "I... it's hard to explain, but... to put it simply: I don't want to put myself through heartache."

"You think I'll break your heart?" Ivan suggested like he was horrified that Gilbert would think such a thing.

Gilbert looked to him and saw the disturbance on the Russian's face. "No! No that's not it..." he then sighed, "It's my own problem. I didn't want to say anything earlier because I didn't want to sound like I was in love with you, and I'm not, but... I can see myself falling for you easily, and it scares me." Pink eyes slid shut, feeling utterly confused with himself.

Ivan sighed, "So, we can't be anything because you're afraid you'll fall in love with me?" he asked for reassurance.

"Pretty much."

"Do you know how hard it's going to be to keep my hands off of you now?" Ivan asked with a growl in his voice, his words made Gilbert blush softly. "You say you think you can fall for me, and I'm probably closer there than you are, but I can't do anything? That's just..." he stopped, trying to find a word to use.

"Selfish?" Gilbert forced another chuckle. "I know. I'm sorry."

"Is there any way I can change your mind?" Ivan asked, practically begging for a chance to be with the other.

"... if you could promise not to leave me, then maybe, but..."

"Then I won't leave, I'll stay by your side forever." Ivan said eagerly.

Gilbert rolled over onto his side, his back turned to the Russian, "You don't even know what you're saying..." his eyes narrowed sadly.

Ivan gave up. He figured that Gilbert wasn't going to budge on this, but it made him angry. Now that he _knew_ he couldn't have Gilbert in anyway other than a friend, it just made him want him so much more. To think, all the things he could make Gilbert experience with him could never happen because of Gilbert's fear of falling in love, even with Ivan's promise to stay by him.

He was right; he is closer to being in love than Gilbert is. He's already there.

.

Gilbert was still awake an hour or so later. He was curled up in his blanket but he couldn't get warm no matter what he did. It was so cold in the north and it reminded him too much of Neirun; cold, dark, the people seemed a little hostile, with a few diamonds in the rough.

He turned his head a little and pondered for a moment. "... Ivan, you awake?" he called out quietly.

The Russian groaned softly, "Yeah." His tired reply came, "What is it?" he asked.

"I uh..." the Elf buried his mouth under his blanket, "I need you to warm me up again..."

"... what?" Ivan said groggily.

"I'm cold. I need you to warm me." Gilbert repeated.

"I'm too tired to use magic right now, Gilbert." Ivan said with a yawn, "Just curl up more."

"That's not what I meant..." Gilbert mumbled again, "I didn't mean by using your fire..."

As what Gilbert was suggesting became clear to Ivan, his face burned a little and his eyes widened. He stood up from his bed and walked a few feet to Gilbert and sat down next to the curved lump under the covers that was the albino.

"Do you mean it?" he asked with some excitement showing in his voice. "Are you sure?"

Gilbert turned over a little more so he could look up at the other. His face was a bright pink and he looked embarrassed. His expression told Ivan everything he needed to know. The Russian gently brushed some of Gilbert's hair from his face, and Gilbert suddenly scooted over toward the wall more, making room for the larger male to slip under the covers with him.

And Ivan did just that, wasting no time in lying down next to the other. He pulled the blanket around them both and didn't hesitate to press his body against Gilbert's back. The strange energy that suddenly surged through their bodies created by the touching of cold skin excited Ivan and he eagerly wrapped his arm around Gilbert, nuzzling his nose right under the Elf's pointed ear.

"So what happened to your 'no touching' rule?" Ivan asked in a whisper. Ivan's breath tickled Gilbert's ear and sent a shiver through his body that Ivan felt against his own.

"I'm... making an exception because I'm cold." Gilbert mumbled. Ivan couldn't see it, but the Elf's face was burning a bright red and he had butterflies in his stomach.

'_But... I've also changed my mind, I think._' He thought.

Ivan smiled at the answer and nuzzled closer to the albino. It felt wonderful to be holding Gilbert so close to him. The Elf's body fit perfectly against his like a puzzle piece, but he felt so thin and frail in his arms like Ivan could easily break him in two. The Russian savored everything, from the smell of Gilbert's hair to how his breathing moved Ivan's arm that was draped over him, to how Gilbert would occasionally shift his hips slightly to get more comfortable. Ivan was aware of it all and he never wanted to let the other go.

Gilbert was warm and had a sense of comfort, and, much to his surprise, he wasn't feeling scared like he was earlier, he just let himself be cuddled by Ivan and enjoyed every second of it, and soon drifted to sleep.

* * *

**Author's Notes:**  
•I made the Gremlins kind of my own strange creature. I know nothing of their actual lore; I'm just making it up as I go along.  
•You can tell that Gilbert is my favorite character because of how often I make him get hurt. I apologize.  
•I don't think I ever really established this but Gilbert is rather small compared to Ivan. He's about 2 inches shorter and his body is much thinner. I guess my reason for this is that Gilbert is an Elf, which are usually seen as fair and petite, but that works in his favor with being acrobatic and quick on his feet.

—

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	8. Something I Need

**[Originally posted: 10/16/2013]**

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): OC death, soft-core yaoi, fluff, language.**

* * *

Gilbert stirred awake and instantly noticed that Ivan's weight wasn't next to him. He sat up quickly, feeling like he had been abandoned after his 'first time' or something. It was ridiculous how Gilbert's mind was thinking such silly thoughts like this. Luckily for Gilbert, Ivan was just on the other side of the room packing some things into his bag. Gilbert watched him for a moment and yawned before speaking, "What are you doing?" he asked, noticing that the other seemed to be in a sort of rush.

Ivan looked up once he heard Gilbert's voice. "Oh, good morning." He greeted with a smile that disappeared quickly, "It's good you're awake, we have to go. Do you think you can ride?" he asked.

"Uh, I don't know. Maybe?" Gilbert replied, looking at the other strangely. "What's going on? You look a bit pale."

"A letter arrived for us early this morning, from Roderich." Ivan said and buckled his bag together. "Something's happened at the College and he wants us back immediately."

"But the College is like... a 2 day ride from here, right?"

"Yes, but if we don't stop often and cut through the forest, we'll make it there by tomorrow morning." Ivan said in a hurry, shuffling around the room to make sure he got everything.

"Ivan, what exactly happened? You're acting really weird..." Gilbert mumbled the last part. He didn't like how Ivan was pacing around so frantically; it was unlike Ivan to appear so worried.

Suddenly Ivan remembered that Gilbert hadn't been with the College for that long. He went to him and sat on the bed next to him and pulled the letter from his pocket. He unfolded it and pointed to a small symbol in the bottom right corner, a circle that seemed to have the design of a snake with wings on it.

"Roderich only signs things with this symbol if something bad, and I mean really bad, happens." Ivan explained. "He didn't go into any detail, which means that it's bad enough that he needs to tell us in person."

Gilbert stared at the handwritten letter and at the small symbol, and he couldn't help this sense of dread creep into him.

Ivan stood up. "We need to hurry. I'll help you pack and if you can't ride on your own then you can ride with me, and Enea will just follow." He said and looked to Gilbert.

"Alright." The albino agreed and got out of bed. His body ached but there weren't any bad pains. He joined Ivan in packing, limping around a little from the cast around his ankle.

Soon the two were downstairs in the inn. Ivan thought it'd be a good idea to eat and drink before they left since the ride would be long.

Gilbert silently sat across from Ivan and drank some of his drink. His mind was wandering, wondering what could have happened at the College. He had such a terrible feeling, and he didn't notice how the Russian was watching him intensely.

Ivan could tell that Gilbert was on edge, but he didn't know why. Is it because of last night or is it what's happening with the College? He figured he'd just ask, but the words were harder to bring up in the silence.

"So... how do you feel?" Ivan asked, and hid most of his face behind his cup as he took a drink.

Gilbert looked at him for a moment before answering. "A little sore, but it's nothing I can't handle." Gilbert said with a crooked grin.

Ivan stared at the liquid in his cup and waited for a few seconds before speaking again. "Were you warm enough last night?" He asked, glancing over the brim of the cup. The albino nearly choked on his drink and he coughed a little. His face flushed slightly and he was clearly distraught by the question. Ivan couldn't help but chuckle. "You're so flustered, it's cute." He said.

Gilbert scoffed and turned his head. "I was warm, alright? So... thank you." He mumbled, "And don't call me cute! It's belittling."

"Well, you _are_ little, Gilbert." Ivan teased and titled his cup to take a drink. Gilbert simply groaned and pressed his cheek into his palm. It was true that he was smaller than Ivan in every way, but it was embarrassing to have it pointed out.

Soon their food came to their table and they ate as quickly as they could without choking. They paid for the food and then left the inn. Outside they found their horses tied to a fence and they attached their bags to the animals.

"Do you want to try to ride or do you just want to come with me?" Ivan asked as he tightened a strap on Riverwind's saddle.

"I'll just ride with you; I don't feel like falling off my horse again." Gilbert said.

Ivan nodded and held his hand out and Gilbert took it. The Russian helped the albino up onto the saddle and carefully mounted his horse as well. He trotted over to Enea and grabbed her reins. He pulled her close and then began to trot down the road. Soon Enea was following close to Riverwind and the two men were out of the city in minutes.

.

They arrived in TorchlightForest early the next morning, it was still dark out but Ivan was still riding strong. Gilbert had his arms wrapped tightly around the other male, and he could feel just how tense he was. The albino glanced up into the sky and saw hundreds of stars, but he couldn't find any peace with them. He knew that something was wrong and it was getting closer to the time they found out what.

Soon Ivan pulled Riverwind to a stop, Enea following close behind and neighing. Ivan turned around and looked at Gilbert and nodded, but Gilbert glanced off to the side and gasped.

"Elizaveta." He said with some surprise in his voice as he saw the woman.

"It's good that you two are back, Roderich needs to-" she stopped upon seeing the albino, "What the hell happened to you Gilbert? You look like you fell down a mountain." She said looking over the injured man.

"I fell down a hole, if that's similar enough." Gilbert shrugged.

"Right... anyway, Roderich needs to see you two right away." Elizaveta said.

Ivan nodded and slid off his horse and then turned toward Gilbert and held his hands up. The albino gave him a weird look before glancing down to the Russian.

"You've got to be kidding me..." Ivan mumbled just loud enough for Gilbert to hear. "You're hurt and you're getting embarrassed _now?_" he asked.

Gilbert glared down at the other. He didn't want to seem weak in front of Elizaveta, but in reality the woman would probably beat his ass anyway. Gilbert took a long moment to swallow his pride and lifted his good foot over the horse and slid down right into Ivan's arms.

"Thank you." Ivan said quietly. "Can you stand okay? We were riding for a long time." He asked.

"Yeah I should be fine. We should get inside and see what happened."

"Go to Roderich's study, he's there with Arthur." Elizaveta said, "I'll put your horses in the stables."

Ivan nodded and began walking in, waiting to see if Gilbert needed help. The albino was limping a little but not too bad; it was probably just because of the cast around his leg making it heavier. The two entered the College hall and were instantly greeted by two familiar faces, Francis and Antonio.

"Oh, you two are back as well?" Francis asked.

Ivan let the words sink in for a moment, "Roderich called you back too?"

Francis nodded, "Sadly, yes... you might want to hurry. Roderich will want to speak with you immediately."

"Can you tell us what happened?" Gilbert said.

Antonio shook his head, "'Fraid not, friend. Roderich has to do that. Though... when you get back, tell us what happened to you, you look like you fell-"

"Down a mountain? Elizaveta already got that one. I fell down a hole." Gilbert said with a glare.

"Well I'm sure that's a fun story anyway." Antonio smiled teasingly.

Ivan patted Gilbert's shoulder, "We should get going then." He said and then gripped the fabric of his cloak and pulled him down the hall. Gilbert was yelling at him to let him go but the Russian did no such thing.

As the yells of the distressed albino went out of earshot, Antonio nudged Francis' arm. "Notice anything different about them?" he asked.

"It seems our little Elf didn't have that bad of a time as he thought he would." The blond said with a laugh.

"Seems so. Even Ivan's acting different." Antonio said, "Ah! Wait, what if they did it?" he beamed toward his partner.

"It? You mean sex?" Antonio nodded eagerly. "I don't know... well, they were gone for like 4 days, right?"

"High tension, alone together, and they're acting like best buds now that they're back?"

"Ivan just dragged him away, he does that a lot, it hardly means that they're fucking." Francis said and patted the brunet's shoulder a few times. "However... I know how we can find out for sure." Francis grinned, and Antonio smiled excitedly.

.

The two entered Roderich's study and were instantly shot an annoyed glance from the blond in the room, the glare accompanied with a tut. "It's about time you got back." Arthur complained with his arms folded across his chest.

"Well you only sent us across the continent." Gilbert shot back, leaning against the wall. The two shared a glare for a moment before Roderich stood from his seat.

"Enough. We have more important things to worry about than your petty arguments." Roderich said.

"You called Francis and Antonio back too." Ivan looked to the brunet. "What's going on?"

"It's Beatrice." He said and sighed before looking straight at the two men. "She's dead."

There was a moment of silence and a thick feeling of dread in the air. Both Ivan and Gilbert were stunned with the news.

"She's... dead?" the albino's eyes were wide as he spoke, like he couldn't believe it.

"Yes... the day after you two left, she suddenly went into a frenzy, screaming and yelling in a different language, and then she suddenly collapsed. We tried to help her, but she just kept yelling and we couldn't get close enough to her." Roderich said.

Arthur cleared his throat. "We believe that she was speaking Elvish. She kept mentioning someone named 'Never', or something like that, I couldn't quite understand it all. From what I was able to translate over the last few days, though, is that this 'Never' person plans to return, or something of the sort."

Ivan held his chin in his hand, thinking and wondering what this all meant. Meanwhile, Gilbert was wide-eyed and if he could get any paler he would, he looked like he had just seen a ghost.

"Gilbert, what's wrong?" Roderich asked, causing the other two men to look at the albino.

"I... the person Beatrice mentioned, his name is Neyvar." He looked to Roderich. The brunet noticed the similarity between the sound of the guy's name and the city and Sector that Gilbert is from. Roderich became curious about the connection.

"How do you know him?" Arthur asked.

"I don't, really. It's a legend where I'm from. Neyvar is a dragon, as far as I knew he was a myth made up to scare children. He was killed several thousands of years ago by his own kin for betraying them, or so the legend says. The story always ends with the assumption that one day he'd return and cause destruction, but I never thought it could actually be true."

"Well it is, according to Beatrice." Arthur said, "Do you know anything else?"

"No I don't, it's a really old story and it's been changed over the years. I don't think I even know the original story." He said.

The blond sighed, "I suppose I'll just have to do some more research then." He turned to Roderich and nodded his head before excusing himself from the room.

"So, you two look like you've been through hell. Especially you, Gilbert. Why don't you tell me what happened?" Roderich asked.

Gilbert laughed weakly and sat down in one of the chairs on the other side of Roderich's desk. "I got attacked by bandits, fell down a hole, attacked by Gremlins. It was fun." He said.

"Sounds like it." he said and then looked to Ivan, "And your payment?"

Ivan rummaged through his pockets. "We didn't get to all the jobs, but hopefully we have enough to at least balance some things out." he said and placed the two bags of money on Roderich's desk. Roderich instantly began to sift through the money.

He smiled after a moment, looking pleased. "I'd say so. You made quite a bit of money." He said.

"Roderich, why did you call us all back here? Antonio and Francis are two of the College's strongest warriors, and you called us back too. You wouldn't do that if you didn't think something was going on."

Roderich sighed and thought for a moment. "Beatrice starts screaming about some ancient dragon returning to the planet and how there might be another war happening, so I want my best mages and warriors here." He glanced to the two men, "You and Gilbert happen to be strong, and we'll need you here if something happens."

Gilbert's eyes widened at Roderich's comment, but he didn't say anything. Though it felt nice to be considered strong.

"I understand."

"Good. That being said, I don't want you two leaving the College for a while, not until Arthur can get more answers. You two can take a break from jobs to rest and heal up if you want." He said, "You may go now, unless you have any more questions."

Both Ivan and Gilbert shook their heads and left Roderich's study. They stood for a moment outside the door in silence, like they had something to say but couldn't find the words.

"Uh... Gilbert I-" Ivan managed to squeeze out, but before he could say another word more, someone else shouted Gilbert's name from down the hall in a singsong tone. They looked and saw Francis basically prancing toward them.

The blond threw his arm around Gilbert's shoulder and waited for Antonio to catch up. "Hey Ivan, do you mind if we borrow Gillie here for a while?" he asked.

"Yeah we'd like to talk to him a bit since we've never talked much."

"Um, sure." Ivan said, blinking a few times in bafflement.

"Alright, bye then~!"

Before Ivan could really comprehend any of what just happened, he was left alone in the hall watching Gilbert be dragged away by the other two men. He found himself thinking and realized that Francis had called Gilbert 'Gillie', which was a cute nickname and one that he'd plan on using eventually. However, he sighed and began walking.

'_I was going to see if he wanted me to cut his hair..._' he thought to himself as he made his way back to his room.

.

Francis and Antonio dragged Gilbert to the dinner room. Sitting down, the two men stared at the albino with wide and expecting eyes.

"Uh... can I help you?" Gilbert asked after feeling thoroughly violated through their sight. He glanced back and forth to both of them, wondering what they were up to.

"Oh no no, we just want to get to know you a bit more." Francis said.

"We did say we'd get you some drinks when you got back." Antonio added with a few nods.

"Are we getting drinks then?" Gilbert asked.

"Not yet, first tell us something about yourself, Gillie." Francis said and patted Gilbert's hand, which the albino twitched away from almost instantly. He realized then that he didn't like other's touching his hand, but he had no problem sleeping right against Ivan.

"Uh... well I'm an Elf, but that's obvious. I'm albino... also obvious..." he trailed off nervously, looking to the side as he tried to think of other things to tell.

"Hm... how do you feel about Ivan?" Francis asked, trying to be clever and sneak the topic in.

"Ivan? He's alright I guess." Gilbert answered. "Spending the last few days with him has been rough, especially since we didn't always get along."

"But you did get along a little?" Antonio prodded.

Gilbert shrugged, "I guess when it comes to life and death you kind of have to get along on some level."

"I see... so did you sleep with him yet?" Francis asked.

If Gilbert had a drink, he would have choked on it, but his own saliva worked well enough. After coughing for a few seconds he finally spoke, trying to ignore the warmth on his face. "E-Excuse me?"

"Well you know, after being on the road with someone for so long, tensions often run high, sometimes you just have to-"

"No no. No. Just- no, okay?" Gilbert stuttered incoherently and then laughed nervously. "I mean, I've never even- and Ivan is just- No."

Francis laughed, "Calm down Gilbert, it's alright."

"Wait Gilbert, are you a virgin!?" Antonio asked a bit too loudly in his excitement and Gilbert twitched back a little at the question.

"_Antonio_." Francis growled a little.

"What? No, I-" Gilbert stopped, and looked down. "... I mean, I guess? So what if I am? It's not that big a deal..." he mumbled.

"You're 25 and never got laid. Wow... we need to change that." Antonio said in amazement.

"_No thanks._" Gilbert held his forehead in his hands and looked at the table under him.

"Well, maybe not _us_, but maybe someone we know." The blond said with a grin.

The last comment made Gilbert look toward the others. "What are you talking about?"

"Well... I just figured since you've been spending so much time with him, maybe you should do it with Ivan."

Gilbert leaned back in his seat, completely astonished by the two men in front of him. "Did you guys drag me here just to tell me to have sex with Ivan?" he asked, his cheeks flushing a little pink as he spoke.

"No, of course not." Francis said and then grinned, "We brought you here to ask if you already did, but since you're a virgin and obviously haven't, now we're saying you should."

Gilbert grit his teeth and then suddenly stood up. "I can't believe you guys, I'm not going to sit here and be mocked like this." He said and walked toward the exit of the dining hall. Francis called out to him, apologizing and asking him to come back. The Elf didn't listen, and slammed the door of the dining hall behind him.

Antonio looked at Francis after sighing, "I hope we didn't make him too angry..."

The blond laughed softly, "He may be angry with us, but Ivan may thank us later." He grinned.

.

Gilbert nearly stumbled on his way back to his room. He couldn't help but wonder why Francis and Antonio were so interested in Ivan and him. It's like they could tell from a glance that something happened between them. Something _did_ happen, but it wasn't anything even close to sex.

The albino's face warmed up when he remembered how it felt to have Ivan pressed right into his back. He could feel the outline of the larger man through his thin clothing and the warmth he brought him. He began to wonder what it would feel like if that clothing were to suddenly be removed. The skin of Ivan's hands were rough but always felt good when his fingers grazed his own skin when he helped with his wounds, so it brought an interesting thought to his mind: How would it feel to be touched all over with those calloused hands, to have those strong arms and legs rubbing bare against his own.

Gilbert leaned against the wall beside him and cupped his hand over his mouth. His face was a bright red and he squeezed his eyes shut tightly. '_Why am I thinking this all of a sudden?_' he asked to himself. He was never one to imagine himself with another in a sexual way, and recently something clicked and he wanted to be close to Ivan, but thanks to those two idiots, it was all that was on his mind now.

"Gilbert?" the albino heard his name and he glanced up with wide eyes. Peeking out of a doorway he saw the face of the Russian, who Gilbert had just been shamefully imagining thrusting into him from behind, and he felt like he had been caught doing something horrible. Thankfully Ivan couldn't see the image that had been burned into Gilbert's mind.

"Are you alright? You look sick." Ivan asked, noticing how the other was holding his hand over his mouth. He fully exited the room and walked closer to Gilbert, and the Elf backed up with every step Ivan took.

"Stay back." He said with a shaky voice.

"Gilbert what's wrong?" Ivan asked with concern lacing his voice and leaned down a little to inspect Gilbert's face. The albino turned away in an attempt to hide the red on his face. Ivan noticed that the Elf's ears were burning red as well, and he realized that Gilbert was blushing and acting a bit more jumpy than usual. "What did Francis and Antonio do to you?" he asked.

"... nothing. They just talked to me." Gilbert answered. It was the truth but he felt incredibly guilty like it was a lie.

The Russian sighed and grabbed the smaller man's hand. "C'mon, I want to talk to you." He said and began pulling the other into their room.

Ivan shut the door behind Gilbert and locked it so they wouldn't be disturbed. He then walked around to the front of the albino who was standing in front of the door and staring at the floor.

"What did they say to you?" Ivan asked. He knew that Francis and Antonio were very blunt, and blunt was something that Gilbert wasn't exactly good with. They also tended to invade other's comfort zones without any care at all.

Gilbert let his head fall to the side and he continued to ignore the question. Ivan sighed, and walked to his bed and sat down. "Alright, since you won't tell me, how about I talk then?" he suggested. Gilbert glanced up at him through messy strands of white hair. "I was going to ask you earlier when those two dragged you away, but do you want me to cut your hair now that we're back?" he asked.

Gilbert's eyes widened a little and his lips parted a centimeter. "Yeah... that'd be nice." He agreed.

Ivan smiled happily and stood up. He moved a stool from one side of the room and sat it in the middle for Gilbert to sit on. Gilbert sat down while Ivan looked through one of the drawers in his dresser. The albino began to think of why he agreed so quickly to the offer. He knew he needed to get his hair cut to make it even, but he really just jumped at the chance to feel Ivan's fingers in his hair. It was pathetic and he knew it, but he wanted the other to touch him without actually telling him too.

"How short do you want it?" Ivan asked as he walked back to the other. He twirled a shiny and sharp but rather small blade in his hand.

Gilbert thought for a moment. "Like I had it back in school."

"So, really short? I think I can manage that." He said and circled around to the back of the albino. He set the blade aside for now and then carefully picked up the other's hair into his hand, after separating a section of it he brought the dagger up and placed it against the strands of hair. "Try not to move, I don't want to accidentally cut you." He said. Gilbert didn't reply in anyway and Ivan took the moment of silence as a green light. He slid the blade through Gilbert's hair, slicing the long strands of white off. He repeated this with the rest until Gilbert's hair was short and he could actually see his neck. He even shagged the top a little so it stuck up in several places. He ran his hand through the mess of white and ruffled it a little. Gilbert had to suppress a small moan of delight when he did.

Ivan then moved to the side of Gilbert and cut the long strands falling down in front of his ears to match the others. Ivan's finger ghosted over the Elf's pointed ears and the touch made Gilbert shiver a little, he hated how much he loved it, but he also couldn't help that his ears were sensitive.

After cutting the other side, Ivan moved in front of Gilbert and leaned down a little. He held the pieces of hair by Gilbert's ears and looked closely at them. Ivan unintentionally leaned in toward the other and suddenly the albino's face lit up a bright pink; he couldn't look at anything but the pair of lips that were inches from his face.

Ivan suddenly grinned, "You're blushing." He teased and leaned back a little.

The Elf's face instantly burned more with embarrassment of being caught and he looked away. "Shut up, it's only because you were getting too close to me."

"You were staring at my lips." Ivan said smugly.

"So what!? It's not like you weren't thinking it either!" Gilbert yelled.

"Actually, I was checking if your hair was even or not, but I could always think about kissing you." He said and moved a little closer. He cupped Gilbert's chin and brought pink eyes up to look at him. He leaned in a little more so that their noses were just barely touching, and just when he was about to kiss him, Gilbert whispered out.

"No."

The word froze Ivan for a moment before he pulled back. "What?"

"Don't kiss me." He said. Ivan could tell that the words hurt the albino to say, but he didn't understand why he told him not to.

"Give me a reason -a _good_ reason- and I won't." Ivan said, "If you can't, then I'll kiss you."

"Isn't my telling you not to a good enough reason?"

"It would be if you _didn't_ want it, but I can tell from the way you react when I touch you and how you were looking at me, you want me to kiss you, so let me." Ivan said as he ran a hand through Gilbert's hair and the albino instantly leaned into his touch. Gilbert knew he wanted it and with that hand in his hair, he couldn't even remember his reason for why he told Ivan not to.

Ivan smiled a sad little smile and let his fingers just graze the skin under Gilbert's chin. He moved back down to his position he was in before and this time he nuzzled his nose against Gilbert's. The albino held back a chuckle from the action and a little puff of air came out of his nose instead. Ivan smiled more and he tilted his head, and for the first time he pressed his lips gently to Gilbert's.

Gilbert's body tensed up as he felt Ivan's lips touch his, and when Ivan moved his a little, Gilbert felt like he was melting. Soon Ivan's hands slid down and wrapped around the albino's waist, and he moved his body closer. He nudged at Gilbert's knee to see if he could slip between the albino's legs, and much to Ivan's surprise, Gilbert allowed the man between his legs so he could get closer, but still, Gilbert made no attempt to touch or kiss the other back.

Ivan gripped tightly at Gilbert's clothing and pressed his lips harder against his. He forced the albino's lips open and slid his tongue in. Gilbert let out a startled squeak when Ivan's warm tongue touched his. It was weird to actually be able to taste the other, but the taste wasn't as noticeable as the surge of warmth that the wet muscle was sending through his body. Ivan's tongue expertly prodded and slid around Gilbert's, causing the albino to let out a moan that he had been holding back. Ivan parted from the other to grin at him and to admire that pale face that had been painted a bright red because of him; he also noticed the familiar look of arousal in his eyes and expression.

Gilbert welcomed Ivan's tongue again, opening his mouth obediently for the Russian as he neared him. Ivan gladly slid his tongue along Gilbert's until he closed the gap between their lips. This time Gilbert's arms wrapped around Ivan's neck and he pressed his body close to the Russian's. It wasn't long before Ivan had Gilbert groaning and moaning softly again; the albino was simply amazing and Ivan couldn't have asked for more. He could feel Gilbert's arousal beginning to press into his front, and he knew that Gilbert was new to being touched and he didn't want to take things too far unless Gilbert was okay with it. Soon he parted from the kiss again, and the albino was clearly upset, as he whined a little at the empty feeling in his mouth.

"Why did you stop?" Gilbert asked with a lack of breath.

Ivan sighed a little, "Believe me, I didn't want to, but maybe we should stop? You're getting hard and I don't want to do anything to you unless you're comfortable with it." the Russian said.

Gilbert looked down, feeling embarrassed, but then he saw something. "... but you're hard too."

The comment made Ivan blush and he looked down. Their bodies were pressed right against each other, and the effects of the previous kisses were obvious. Ivan then suddenly picked Gilbert up, the albino's legs wrapping instinctively around the larger man's waist.

"Ivan? Ivan what are you-" he grunted as he felt himself land on the mattress of Ivan's bed, and soon felt the Russian move between his legs. "Ivan..?" traces of fear could be heard in the Elf's voice.

"Tell me what you want." Ivan said and brushed his fingers across Gilbert's cheek. "Tell me what you want to do and what you don't want to do."

Gilbert stared up at the man hovering above him; his face was stern and serious. "I... I don't want to have sex." He said. It was the first thing he thought of and he wanted to make sure Ivan knew he didn't want it.

Ivan leaned down and kissed Gilbert's cheek softly, "That's fine. What else?"

"I want you to kiss me again."

"Also fine." Ivan said and gave a quick kiss to the albino's pale pink lips. "But, what do you want to do about the problems in our pants?"

Gilbert blushed and turned his head, "I don't know... you decide." He said.

"You want me to decide what to do?" Gilbert nodded. "Alright... well..." he stopped and began to think. His face turned red from the ideas he was getting. He could have Gilbert sit in his lap and they could touch each other that way, or they could take turns giving each other oral. Just thinking of watching Gilbert wrap his pretty pink lips around him threatened to get him harder.

"Ivan?" Gilbert questioned when he noticed Ivan's face burning brighter. The albino placed his hand on the Russian's arm. "What do you want to do?"

Ivan cleared his throat and moved to sit on the backs of his legs, still between the albino's thin ones. There was just enough room under the bunk-bed for them to sit up. "You could... sit in my lap and we could both touch each other?" he suggested, feeling embarrassed for saying it out loud. He wasn't used to actually saying it to someone he cared about beyond a physical want. He looked away from Gilbert, feeling a sudden burst of shyness.

Suddenly the Elf sat up and he scooted his body closer to Ivan's. He gripped onto Ivan's shoulders and pushed him back a little so that he was sitting on his rear rather than his legs. Gilbert then lifted himself and straddled the Russian, a red streak burning across his cheeks.

Ivan was surprised with the Elf's boldness and he felt himself grow hotter and harder with the albino sitting in his lap. "You're sure about this?" Ivan asked while he could still think straight.

Gilbert raised an eyebrow, "No, I sat on you just to tease you." He said sarcastically.

Ivan smiled playfully and pulled the albino closer by the waist, earning a groan from the man as their groins grinded together. "Say Gilbert, you never answered my earlier question..." Ivan said and stole a quick kiss that the Elf chased after.

"What question?" Gilbert asked halfheartedly and tried to resume the kiss, but Ivan dodged and the albino only caught the corner of his mouth.

"What did Francis and Antonio say to you that got you so flustered?" The Russian asked as he trailed a finger up the albino's chest until he reached his chin.

Gilbert paused for a moment and shifted his hips slightly. "They... asked if we had sex while we were gone."

Ivan suddenly pulled back a little, "What?"

Gilbert shrugged, "I don't know, they seemed like they expected it or something. Is it normal for College partners to do that when on jobs?" he asked.

"Maybe, occasionally it might happen. Francis isn't shy about his lust, I feel bad for Antonio and I'm almost certain those two have done it. I don't know about anyone else." Ivan said. "So... what did you tell them?"

Gilbert blushed and chuckled nervously. "Well they know I'm a virgin, so the chances of them telling people we did it are slim."

Ivan's lips turned into a small frown, "Are you really a virgin?" he asked.

The albino watched him for a moment before answering, "Does it bother you?"

The Russian shook his head, "No not at all, I'm glad actually. I get to be the first one to touch you." He said, "But... does it bother you that I'm not?" Ivan asked, clearly sad by the possibility.

Gilbert smiled sadly and brought a hand up to Ivan's ashy-blond hair. "No it doesn't bother me. Besides, at least one of us knows what we're doing." He gave a shy smile as he played with some of the Russian's hair.

Ivan smiled at his words. "That's true; however I've never pleasured a man before so it'll be a bit different with you." He said and kissed Gilbert softly. He pulled the pale man closer to him and continued to kiss him, keeping it soft. After a while of the sweet kiss, Ivan pulled back.

"Gilbert, what changed?" he asked as he rubbed his thumb against the albino's cheek, "Why are you letting me do this now?"

The albino's eyes narrowed. "I was scared to fall in love, but I don't see a point in fighting what I want when I'm already in love." He said.

"I don't believe that you love me, Gilbert, not yet, but I'll make you love me and you won't regret letting me do any of it." he said and kissed the other's cheek.

Gilbert leaned his head forward and rested it against Ivan's chest, his arms tightening a little around the broad shoulders of the larger male.

"Gilbert?" Ivan asked worriedly.

"I'm sorry, but... can we stay like this for a while?" he asked in a whisper. "I don't want to do anything after all."

Ivan smiled and ran a hand through Gilbert's freshly cut hair. "Of course." He said.

Ivan turned his body with Gilbert still in his lap and then laid down so that his head was on his pillow. He looked up at the albino still straddling him and gently gripped at the males thin hips.

"Lay with me?" The Russian requested.

Without a reply, Gilbert moved off of the other's groin and lifted one leg to the other side of Ivan's body and laid next to him. He curled up and snuggled close to the Russian as he felt a strong arm wrap around him and hold him tightly. The Elf closed his eyes when he felt the beginnings of tears sting them, and he felt Ivan lean down to kiss the top of his head. The gesture made Gilbert suddenly cry audibly and Ivan felt guilty like he was the one who made Gilbert cry. He just continued to pepper the white mess of hair with kisses.

Ivan had no idea why Gilbert was crying or why he suddenly stopped and looked so sad. In a way he was glad though, he didn't want to rush anymore with Gilbert, he wanted to go slow and savor every moment with the Elf.

After a few minutes he noticed that Gilbert's breathing had changed and he wasn't crying anymore, but sleeping quietly. Ivan carefully pulled his blanket up around the sleeping albino and tucked it snugly around his body. He turned to face the Elf and brushed his knuckles across the skin of Gilbert's cheek, he could feel dried tears on his skin and he wiped at them a little before wrapping his arm around the smaller man, resting his head on top of his, and closed his eyes to sleep.

* * *

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	9. Time Off

**[Originally posted: 10/31/2013]**

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Use of alcohol, soft-core yaoi.**

* * *

The incident with Beatrice seemed to fade almost entirely. No one talked about it, and there was no news about Neyvar or anything. It's like it never even happened. After the funeral for Beatrice, everyone was suddenly quiet about the entire thing. Even a couple months after it happened, no one said a word. At first, Arthur was hard at work trying to find out more about the war that Beatrice spoke of, but after a few weeks, word of that died down too. Roderich went back to teaching his classes and Elizaveta taught her students as well.

Ivan and Gilbert seemed to be the only ones who were confused about the silence. They were called back from important jobs for this and suddenly everyone wanted to forget it. Many nights the two would lie awake in their beds and talk, exchanging ideas of what was happening. Maybe they were planning something behind their backs? Maybe they think it's better to just not talk about it. Or maybe they're just ignoring the whole situation.

That possibility annoyed Gilbert, and he fumed about it almost every morning for about a week, and this morning was no exception. He lied awake on his bed above Ivan's and glared at the gray stone ceiling above him. _'If something big is happening, then why aren't we preparing for it?'_ he would ask himself. His thoughts were always interrupted by the door to the room opening. This was part of his and Ivan's daily routine as well. Ivan would wake Gilbert up and then he'd go get breakfast for them both and by time he returned, Gilbert would be fully awake and glaring a hole into the solid stone above him.

Things between these two were a bit odd as well. After their rather intimate encounter about 2 months ago, they've been strangely... tame. They've barely even kissed each other since then, and what was even more bizarre was that neither of them acted on the lack of intimacy. Ivan would cut Gilbert's hair every few weeks, which gave the Russian an opportunity to kiss the albino that he would never miss. These kisses were always deep and passionate and definitely enough to get them both wanting more, but whenever it got to that point, Gilbert would back out and just ask to sleep or say that he didn't want to do anything more.

Today it hit Ivan and suddenly he realized how much it was bothering him. He wanted things to go further with Gilbert but he didn't know how to start something like that, especially since Gilbert was the one stopping the interactions. Gilbert's mind has been preoccupied lately with the whole Neyvar thing and this war that was supposed to happen soon, but you'd think that _something_ would have happened after 2 months. However, hoping for something to happen with Gilbert would have to wait, since today would be the last he would see of the albino for a week or so.

Gilbert sat up, being careful not to slam his face against the ceiling, which he has done a few times since being here, and leaned over the railing of his bed, folding his arms on the wood. "'Morning." He said to Ivan with a tired smile.

Ivan returned the smile and set the tray of food down on the table in the room. "Did you get enough sleep last night?"

Gilbert shrugged. "I guess."

"I hope so, everyone's leaving today." Ivan said and bit into a piece of meat.

The albino leaned over the bed a little more to get a better view of Ivan, "What are you talking about?"

"Winter festival." Ivan said and swallowed the food in his mouth. "It's a weeklong holiday, the College shuts down for it and allows members to go home and visit their families. Aren't you going back home to see your brother?" he asked.

Gilbert's eyes widened a little. _'Go back to see my brother...?'_ just thinking about it made him feel a little sick to his stomach. How could he go back and face Ludwig after all this time? How could he return home after leaving twice and come back with nothing to show?

Gilbert looked down, and Ivan noticed the forlorn look on the albino's face. "Gilbert?" he spoke out.

The Elf shifted his eyes to Ivan, "I think I'll just stay here."

Ivan's eyes widened, "For the entire week? Are you sure?"

"I can't go home, besides, my brother will be too busy to spend time with me. I'd rather just spend the week here alone."

Ivan watched Gilbert's expression closely. He could tell that he didn't want to be alone at all, and that he wished he could see his brother. Surely his brother could take at least a day or two off of work to see the brother he hasn't seen in months?

"You could come with me." Ivan suddenly suggested. It sounded like more of a question and it just kind of slipped from his lips, like he just said the first thing on his mind.

"What?" Gilbert raised a thin white eyebrow.

"Yeah... yeah you could come with me. My village isn't too far from here and I'm sure my sisters won't mind you staying with us." Ivan said.

"But isn't the point of this holiday to spend time with loved ones?" Gilbert asked.

"Yes, and...?" Ivan asked, giving a small smirk toward the albino.

Gilbert blushed and he looked away, "Don't say stupid things like that..."

"You mean cute things that you actually like hearing me say?" Ivan teased with a chuckle. "No I think I'll keep doing it, it's cute when you get so red." He laughed. "Come on, come with me, I insist."

Gilbert thought for a moment. "Are you sure it's okay? I don't want to take you away from your sisters..."

"Don't worry; I'm sure they'll love to meet you." Ivan said and then grinned. "After all, they _should_ meet my lover."

"I am _not_ your lover!" Gilbert yelled, his face flushing red. He moved back onto his bed and turned onto his side to face the wall.

Ivan stood up and walked over to the beds. He could easily see over the bunk and see Gilbert's body. The Elf was curling up a little and his ears were turning a light red. Ivan thought it was cute how shy Gilbert was still, even after all the passionate kisses they've shared, it was still so easy to embarrass him. Ivan reached a hand over and gently stroked his fingers against the back of the albino's neck, causing him to shiver a little. He looked over his shoulder at the Russian, face still red.

"Please come..." Ivan practically begged, his eyes looked sad and his fingers played with some strands of white hair by Gilbert's ear.

Gilbert stared at him for a moment. "You really want me to?" he asked.

Ivan nodded. "I'd miss you, but... I'm worried that my sisters will be upset with me since I haven't visited..."

"So you want me to be your shield?" Ivan nodded again, feeling pathetic, and Gilbert scooted over to him. "You're hopeless." He said and kissed Ivan's forehead. "Fine, I'll go."

Ivan smiled a little and leaned in to give Gilbert a kiss on the lips. "Thank you." He said. "Now let's eat and start packing."

.

After all that was left on the tray of food was some breadcrumbs, the two began packing for their trip together. Ivan had been wrapping his neck in bandages since his scarf had been stained with Gilbert's blood, and each morning he did it, Gilbert would feel guilty for giving Ivan those scars that he had to cover. Gilbert asked what kind of clothes he should bring, and Ivan told him that he should bring things that are warm, but not to worry too much as he could provide something at the house for him if he needed.

Gilbert was wondering if Ivan felt the same way as he did, but for some reason this didn't feel like they were going on a job, it actually felt like they were going somewhere together as a couple. However, he shook that thought from his head as he shoved a large knit sweater into his bag and sighed. He too noticed the strangeness between Ivan and himself. After that incident 2 months ago, they seemed to halt their interactions aside from the small kisses like they just shared, and then the more passionate ones when Ivan cut his hair. Unlike Ivan, though, Gilbert knew why this was happening, because he was the one making it stop, and he knew why he was doing that too.

He pushed his thoughts aside and forced a smile when Ivan asked if he was ready, and the two left their room. They walked in silence down the hall, passing a few other students that they rarely see who were getting ready to leave as well. Elizaveta stepped out of her room and saw the two men walking in her direction.

"Hey, good morning." She greeted with a happy smile.

Ivan bowed his head a little and Gilbert gave a wave.

"Jeeze, you two sure are quiet." She said.

"We're not the only ones." Gilbert said, and Ivan nudged him a bit roughly with his elbow and glared softly at him. "What? It's true?" he growled a little toward the Russian.

"What are you talking about?" the woman asked.

Gilbert looked back to her. "Ever since Beatrice's funeral, everyone has been quiet, especially about Neyvar." He said. "Why are we just sitting around?"

Elizaveta sighed irritatingly, "All right Gilbert, what _should_ we do then? Do you have any ideas of how to defeat Neyvar, let alone even locating him?" she asked.

Gilbert stuttered a little "That's not what I mean. It just feels like everyone has forgotten about it or is trying to forget."

"We did lose the oldest member of the College; people are going to be a bit shaken after that." She said and then walked a little closer. "I'll let you two in on a secret since Roderich seems to favor you two. Have you noticed that Arthur hasn't been at the College in weeks?"

The two men nodded a few seconds after fully realizing that the blond had been missing.

"That's because he's traveling around the continent, looking for answers about Neyvar. Arthur is a very powerful mage, despite his obsession with giving things wings, if anyone is going to find answers, it's him. We're waiting for his word before we start moving." She said, "So just enjoy your holiday, and by time you two get back, Arthur may have found something out."

Gilbert looked down, feeling a mix of guilt and anxiety. He felt bad for thinking that the College was doing nothing when they actually have one of their best out there looking for answers. His anxiety came from wondering what would be happening by time they got back.

"Speaking of that." Elizaveta started again, "Are you two leaving soon?"

Ivan nodded, "Yeah."

"Where are you going?" she asked excitedly.

Ivan smiled a little, "To my sisters' house out east. I haven't seen them since I joined the College, so this would be a good time to go see them." He said with a smile.

Elizaveta looked happy for him, and she turned toward Gilbert, "What about you? Where are you going?"

Gilbert froze, "Uh... actually I... I'm going with Ivan to his sisters'." He said with a nervous smile.

"Really?" she seemed stunned, "Why aren't you going home?"

Gilbert let out a shaky laugh, "Long story. I'm not really... on good terms with my family." He said.

"Oh... well um... you two have a good time then." She said and smiled. "It's nice to see you two actually getting along now after the rough start when Gilbert first joined us. I still remember when you put quills in Ivan's bed." She laughed.

Gilbert laughed forcibly, "Yeah let's not bring that up."

Elizaveta laughed more as she walked passed them, "Well have fun you lovebirds~" she hummed jokingly as she walked away.

Gilbert turned around, his face turning a bright red. "W-What?" he asked, but Elizaveta didn't reply, only laughed again.

The albino was about to go after her but Ivan grabbed his shoulder and kept him still, "Let it go, she's just messing with us." He said and then leaned down, "Although she's right." He cooed next to Gilbert's ear.

Gilbert brushed Ivan's hand off of him and crossed his arms. "Whatever." He huffed in embarrassment.

.

Before they knew it, they were galloping down the road again. Ivan pulled his horse next to Gilbert's and he had a wide grin on his face. Gilbert was about to ask why he had that stupid grin on his face, but then the Russian spoke.

"Want to race?" he asked.

Gilbert smiled, eager to take the challenge. "You're on, be warned though, I've gotten better at riding." He gloated.

Ivan smirked, "Good to know." He said, and the two slowed down together. "We'll race to that oak tree in the distance." He said as he pointed in the direction of said tree.

"Got it."

The two set themselves up side by side and got into position. Ivan looked over to Gilbert with a smile, which the albino returned.

"Ready...?" Ivan started, gripping his reins.

"Set..." Gilbert continued, shifting his bodyweight a little.

"GO!" they both yelled together and their horses brayed under them before taking off into a fast gallop. Ivan pulled ahead of Gilbert but soon the albino was right at his side, both smiling ecstatically and their horses speeding up whenever the other would move in front just a tiny bit. Both men were hunched over, trying to pull ahead of the other, but the oak tree was nearing faster and faster and just at the last second, Gilbert suddenly sped ahead of Ivan and Riverwind and he went riding into the small section of trees around the oak. Ivan smiled as he pulled Riverwind to a stop and he circled around in front of the oak tree. After a moment, Gilbert came galloping out of the trees with a bright and happy smile on his face. He trotted over to Ivan, that grin seeming to be permanently glued to his face.

"Congratulations." Ivan said, smiling.

"See I told you I got better." He said smugly, breathing out a bit heavily from the adrenaline rush. "I think I deserve a prize for that.

Ivan grinned and moved closer, "I'll have to think of an appropriate reward then." He said, his eyes heavily hinting at something that probably wasn't as appropriate as one would think.

Gilbert turned his face, blushing softly at the idea. For a moment he beat Ivan, but then he regained himself and Gilbert was put back in his place. It wasn't exactly a bad place though.

Ivan just laughed and began trotting away, the albino soon following behind him.

.

After a few hours of riding, the two reached the inn they stayed at months ago. Ivan glanced over to his partner, "Do you want to stop in for a drink?" he asked, thinking that it'd be best to ask first.

"This is the place with that creepy vampire guy, isn't it?" he asked, and Ivan nodded. "As long as he doesn't do anything to me I'll be fine, and the guy who owns this place will probably be happy that we came back." He laughed.

Inside the inn, Charlie immediately shouted their names excitedly when he saw them, clearly happy that they came back. "How are you two? It's been a while." He asked as the two men sat on the stools at the counter.

"Can't complain." Ivan said.

"You going on more jobs or going home for the holiday?" Charlie asked.

"Going home."

"Together?" the man asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I can't go home, so I'm going with him." Gilbert said suddenly. He felt like he'd be repeating that a lot this week.

"I see... well do you need a room for the night?"

"No, we just wanted to stop in and rest for a little bit." Ivan said.

"Fair enough. By the way, Vincent should be back soon, if you want to say hello to him too. I'm sure he'd love to see Gilbert again." Charlie said with a laugh. Gilbert, however, didn't look too amused. Though he did find some peace in the sympathetic smile he got from Ivan.

After a few minutes, a voice called out, "I'm back!" from by the door, footsteps following. Ivan and Gilbert looked over and coming down the small set of stairs was Vincent. "I thought I smelled you, Gilbert." He said with a grin.

Gilbert cringed in response and shifted in his chair a little.

"Oh don't worry; I know better than to touch you." Vincent said and walked around them to go behind the counter. He had a bag in his hands and he started pulling stuff out of it. He glanced to Gilbert with a grin, one of his fangs poking out from his upper lip a little, "Besides, you have another's scent all over you; I wouldn't want to cause _problems_." He said as he shifted his eyes slowly to Ivan, as he recognized that it was the Russian's scent on nearly every part of the Elf's body. Gilbert's face felt warm when he saw where Vincent's eyes went and he tilted his head down to look at the counter in front of him.

"Look what you did, Vincent, you've gone and embarrassed the boy." Charlie said with a laugh and swatted a cloth at Vincent's head. "If you keep teasing him like this whenever he comes in he'll never come back."

Vincent pouted, "Sorry sorry, I'll behave."

Charlie poured Ivan and Gilbert two drinks and Ivan slid a silver coin to him. Gilbert immediately began chugging his drink and the Russian next to him sighed.

"If you get drunk and can't ride your horse, I'm not letting you ride with me." He said. He was, of course, lying. He'd let Gilbert ride with him any day. Gilbert groaned and swallowed the liquid; just being in the presence of Vincent made him very uneasy.

The vampire came over to him and sat on the stool beside him, which made the Elf shift his weight uncomfortably toward Ivan. "So where are you two heading?" Vincent asked and took a drink of his own.

"East, to my sisters' house, I'm from a small village a few hours down the road." Ivan said and took a sip of his drink.

"I see... must be nice to have family to visit." The vampire said with a tone of sadness in his voice.

"_Vincent_." Charlie interjected, his tone clearly telling the man to stop talking.

"What? What are you talking about?" Gilbert asked after looking toward the vampire, actually showing some curiosity in him.

Vincent moved his crimson eyes to Gilbert, the faint glints of orange shining in them. "I'm old, Gilbert. I was turned 200 or so years ago, any family I had is long dead. Charlie is the only one I have, but he will die as well and I'll have to find a new person to protect."

Gilbert's heart skipped a beat. Vincent's words hit too close to home and his mind started racing. _'I'll have to find someone else too...'_ he thought and then began drinking again to drown out the other thoughts.

"Gilbert slow down, I don't want you drunk while riding a horse." Ivan said and put his hand on Gilbert's that was holding the mug. He pushed down a little so Gilbert would stop and some of the alcohol trickled out of the corner of his mouth.

"Sorry." The albino said and wiped his chin with the fabric of his cloak. He looked into his mug where there was only a bit of the alcohol left sloshing against the sides. "We should get going soon though; we have a few hours left to ride."

Ivan nodded slowly, wondering why Gilbert was suddenly acting so strange. "Yeah. We'll head out soon."

.

Gilbert didn't say much after that. They got back on their horses and began riding again. Ivan noticed how distracted Gilbert seemed, like something Vincent said really bothered him. Ivan didn't know what, though, and thinking about it started to eat at him.

Ivan let it go eventually, though, and continued on until he began to see the buildings of his small village in the distance. He saw the buildings grow nearer and nearer, and he felt a sense of nervousness overtake him. He couldn't help but wonder if his sisters would be upset with him for not visiting, and for how he had changed during the months he had been gone, and for coming back with Gilbert. Honestly, the only reason he begged Gilbert to come was so he could hopefully dodge some questions from his sisters. He knew that Katyusha would just be glad he was home, but Natalia would probably question him about why he didn't visit. He just hoped that bringing Gilbert would take most of their curiosity; he didn't even care if it was brought up that he loved Gilbert. He was a coward and just scared of his sisters' disappointment, and he felt guilty for dragging Gilbert into it too.

After a few more minutes of riding, the two men arrived at the main gate of the small village. Ivan led his horse to the stable, Gilbert following. The two dismounted their horses and gathered their bags before they left their horses in the care of the man there.

The Russian turned to Gilbert. "Well, ready to meet my sisters?" he asked.

Gilbert gave a weak smile. "As ready as I'll ever be." He said.

Ivan's house wasn't too far from the stable, and as they walked down the street, people instantly began to whisper. Gilbert could make out that they were saying Ivan's name and that he's come back. It felt exactly like when Gilbert returned to Neirun, everyone seemed to watch with a look of judgment. Even he was getting the strange looks and he wasn't even from this village. Though he guessed that regardless of where he went, people would give him strange looks anyway.

Soon Ivan turned and went up to a house. It looked fairly nice, two floors and a balcony over the front door that led into a bedroom, made out of wood, and a window in the front with white curtains hanging down.

"Here we are." Ivan said with an exhale.

"Why are you so nervous? I've seen you climb on top of a troll twice your size and stab it through the neck and you're scared of seeing your sisters?" Gilbert asked with a raised eyebrow.

"It's not fear, it's guilt... I'm not exactly the same guy I was when I left." Ivan said with a sigh.

Gilbert's lips turned into a frown and he gently placed his hand on Ivan's arm. "Don't worry, you'll be fine. I'm here as your shield, remember?" he said, flashing a nice smile in the hopes that it would bring Ivan up a little.

It worked for the moment and the Russian smiled a little at Gilbert's words. "Thank you." He said and leaned in and kissed Gilbert's forehead quickly. Gilbert smiled a little more, but he himself felt nervous too. He wondered what Ivan's sisters were like, and would they like him? Did Ivan really plan on telling them that they were involved with each other?

Gilbert partly didn't even _want_ to believe that he was involved with Ivan. Part of him just wanted to run away from him.

Ivan gave 4 solid knocks on the wooden door of his house, and the two men waited there in an excruciating silence. After a moment they began to hear some noise, someone walking through the house, and then the door opened.

A woman with short blonde hair and bright blue eyes answered the door. Her face was a neutral expression until she fully recognized one of the men in front of her. Her eyes widen and her mouth went agape.

"Ivan!" she exclaimed and launched herself out of the doorway and into Ivan's arms. Ivan wrapped his arms around his sister and laughed softly, greeting her with a "hello" as the woman began crying out of happiness. Gilbert stepped back a little, feeling like he was in the way. He had a small smile building on his lips and he felt a bit jealous actually, he imagined that his brother would have the same reaction if he got to see him today. Gilbert became sad watching the two siblings in front of him.

"So, who's your friend?" the woman asked after letting her brother go, looking at the strangely pale man who was standing off in the shadows.

"Right, this is Gilbert Beilschmidt; he's my partner at the College. He'll be staying with us for the week." Ivan introduced him, and Gilbert gave a shy smile and wave. "Gilbert, this is my big sister Katyusha."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Gilbert." The blonde woman smiled politely toward the albino. "Thank you for taking care of my brother." She said.

Gilbert's face flushed a little and he nodded. He didn't feel like he took care of Ivan at all. Ivan was always the one taking care of him and that fact ate away at him, he hated feeling so useless.

"Well, why don't you two come on in? Natalia is in the bath right now but she should be out soon." Katyusha said and walked in; letting the two men follow behind her.

"How is she?" Ivan asked as his sister closed and locked the door.

"She's... good. She's been quiet though. Since you left she's been a little lonely, I'm sure she'll be glad you're back."

Ivan frowned. "I'm sorry I haven't visited." He said.

Katyusha smiled, "Don't worry about it, Ivan; I know what it's like being a member of the College." She said. "Go put your stuff up in your room and I'll start dinner and we can all talk and catch up then, okay?"

Ivan nodded and looked back to Gilbert, and then started walking. Gilbert followed the Russian up a flight of stairs and into a decent sized room. Gilbert noticed the balcony out a door next to the bed.

Ivan closed the door behind Gilbert and dropped his bags, and wrapped his arms tightly around Gilbert's waist from behind, causing the albino to grunt in surprise.

Gilbert looked over his shoulder, "Ivan?"

"Thank you for coming." Ivan mumbled and buried his face into Gilbert's neck.

The Elf placed a hand on Ivan's arm that was around his stomach. "Your sister doesn't seem angry at all. It looks like you didn't even need me." He said with a soft chuckle.

"I still need you." He said. "Natalia is the one who asks questions."

Gilbert sighed and turned around in Ivan's embrace; he then wrapped his arms around the larger male and smiled a little. "Don't worry, I'll protect you."

Ivan gave a crooked smile, knowing that Gilbert had never met Natalia before and probably didn't know what he would be dealing with. "Thank you." He said and leaned in to kiss the other's lips, but just as they made contact, there was a knock at the door that interrupted the kiss. Both of them looked to where the sound came from.

"Ivan? I heard you were home." A soft voice said. "Is someone else in there?"

Ivan quickly let go of the albino. "Yeah, come on in, Natalia."

The door creaked open and there was a shorter girl in a long dress standing there, her hair long and silvery-blonde and her eyes a few shades darker than her sisters.

"Natalia, this is Gilbert, my partner." He said.

The girl looked at Gilbert, her expression blank and cold. Gilbert felt almost violated by her sight, like she was looking straight through him and into his soul or something.

"Partner? As in lover, or...?" her eyes went to Ivan without the rest of her body moving.

Ivan chuckled nervously and glanced to Gilbert out of the corner of his eye. He knew that if his nervous laughter and expression didn't make it obvious enough, Gilbert's bright red face would.

"He is." Natalia said and walked into the room and stared at the Elf. "He seems familiar though..." she said and looked to her brother.

Ivan chuckled again, "I've mentioned him before. He's the Gilbert from school."

"The one that almost killed you?" Her eyes shot back to Gilbert and the albino made an audible squeak.

"It's all right, Natalia, everything's okay now." Ivan said and took a step in front of the Elf.

"He hasn't hurt you again?"

"Not at all, in fact he's done so much for me, and I want you to forget about the past like I have." The Russian said.

Natalia was clearly having issues accepting the man who once tried to kill her brother, but if Ivan cared about him, then she would have to.

"Fine. I'm going to go help Kat, but I will be keeping an eye on him." She said.

"That's fine." Ivan said and sighed when she walked away. He quietly closed his door again and turned back to Gilbert. "I'm sorry, she's protective of me." He said with a small smile.

"Why did you lie like that?" Gilbert asked, his eyes expressing hurt.

"What?"

"About me doing so much for you. I haven't done anything except nearly die and fall down holes, where I still say you should have left me."

Ivan glared, "What did I tell you about saying things like that?" he asked and Gilbert lowered his head a little in shame, "Do you want to know how you've helped me? I'll tell you. As cliché as it sounds, you saved me from myself." He said and Gilbert looked up at him. "After a few months of being at the College, I began to not care about anyone; all that mattered was that I got paid to kill creatures. But then you showed up and I started focusing on you instead, and even though we were fighting, you brought out a side of me where I was actually having fun again and it wasn't all about killing and getting my money, and then... then I started getting feelings for you, and somehow you turned me back into the person I was before." Ivan said and stepped closer to Gilbert, cupping a pale cheek in his palm. "So don't you ever say you haven't done anything for me, because you have."

Gilbert's eyes were narrow as Ivan spoke, and he felt like crying when the Russian said his final words. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry, just don't assume these things, okay?" he asked, smiling a hopeful little smile. Gilbert nodded. "Good, then we'll go downstairs and eat dinner, maybe get you better acquainted with my sisters." He pulled away from Gilbert and held out his hand to the albino, who looked at the hand in confusion. Ivan chuckled and gripped Gilbert's hand and held tightly, and pulled the other out of the room.

.

Ivan and Gilbert walked into the kitchen hand-in-hand, but Natalia had already told Katyusha about them being together, so there was no explanation necessary and she didn't even care to ask about it.

Dinner was fantastic, it not only tasted delicious but it was also a wonderful bonding time for Gilbert and Ivan's sisters. Gilbert came out of his nervous shell a lot and that made Ivan really happy, until Katyusha started telling embarrassing stories of Ivan when he was younger, which made the Russian turn several shades of red and made Gilbert laugh and say how cute Ivan was. They shared stories of their travels together, but left the intimate details out, and ate until they felt sick.

Being home with his sisters made Ivan wonder why he even left home to begin with, but every time he looked to the smiling Elf next to him, he was damn thankful that he did.

Soon dinner was over and the evening was upon them. Gilbert offered to help clean up, which Katyusha _gladly_ took advantage of. Ivan also helped out, but couldn't help but chuckle almost constantly because Katyusha made Gilbert wear a white apron, simply because she thought he'd look cute in it, which he did and Ivan thought so especially. Even Natalia cracked a smile and said that Gilbert would make a good housewife, which made the albino flush red in embarrassment and yell that he's not a woman.

.

It was a quarter after midnight and Gilbert was out on the balcony attached to Ivan's room. The Russian sisters had already gone to bed and Ivan was washing up a little after dinner. Gilbert liked it here. It felt homey and warm, even if it was cold outside and on the balcony. Ivan's sisters were nice, even the younger one warmed up to him after a little; though he did have to promise that he'd never hurt Ivan again. He only wished he could truly promise that.

It felt great to be welcomed into a family like this. The way Katyusha told stories of her little brother made it seem like he and Ivan were getting married or something. Gilbert was happy, but there was a sense of trepidation creeping inside of him that was slowly making its way to the surface.

He tilted his head back a little and gazed up at thousands of stars twinkling in the night sky, some stray dark clouds passing over the moon eerily. It was a beautiful night tonight, and he was happy that he was able to spend it at this house with Ivan and his family. He only wished that he could let his own brother see this, Ludwig would love it. He sighed, watching his breath in the cold air in front of him, and he heard a noise from behind him. He looked and saw Ivan coming through the door and out onto the balcony with him.

"It's cold out here, isn't it?" Ivan asked as he walked next to the albino, leaning against the railing and folding his arms over it.

"Yeah, but it's nice out..." Gilbert said softly and turned his attention back to the sky above him. "I don't think I'll ever get over how beautiful the night sky looks..." he said, his eyes not blinking.

Ivan watched him. He loved seeing Gilbert like this, so content and calm. Still, there was something sad about the albino. He seemed like he didn't want to actually be here.

"Gilbert, do you hate me?" he asked suddenly. The albino looked at him with a confused look. "For trying to force you to let me touch you even though you repeatedly told me no? Or begging you to come here with me today? Or for the way I mistreated you when you first came to the College?"

Gilbert stared at the Russian for a moment, noticing the self-loathing look in his face; Ivan really hated himself for these things...

"You idiot." Gilbert breathed out as he looked back up to the stars. Ivan blinked confusedly at the other male, "If I hated you, I wouldn't have come here with you." He said.

Ivan's eyes widened a little at Gilbert's words, and it was endearing when he saw the light shade of pink coloring the albino's pale cheeks. "Thank you, Gilbert." The Elf smiled ever-so-slightly, but then his entire face lit up and he gasped, he leaned forward, his bare hands gripping the cold railing in front of him. Ivan caught it too, a smile taking his face.

A shooting star soared across the night sky right in front of them, lighting their faces brightly for a moment before it disappeared.

"What... was that?" Gilbert asked in shock, turning his face to Ivan.

"A shooting star." Ivan said. "Make a wish."

"A wish?"

"Yeah, you make a wish on them." The Russian said and closed his eyes, making a wish himself.

Gilbert thought for a moment and closed his eyes as well. _'I wish I were human.'_ He said in his head. He opened his eyes and saw Ivan smiling at him softly.

"What did you wish for?" the Russian asked.

A small sad smile appeared on Gilbert's lips, and they trembled a bit before he answered. "For us to defeat Neyvar." He said, lying.

Ivan nodded. "Yeah, me too." He said with a smile. "We should go inside, it's late and my sisters will wake us up early for breakfast."

Gilbert nodded and turned toward Ivan, and followed the Russian back inside to his room.

"You can sleep in my bed; I'll take the couch downstairs." Ivan said and started gathering his blankets.

Gilbert climbed up and sat on Ivan's bed, resting the backs of his thighs on his calves. "You're not going to stay with me?" he asked.

Ivan turned to the other with slight surprise on his face. "You want me to?"

Gilbert nodded weakly.

The Russian stared for a moment, thinking how utterly adorable the albino looked sitting on his bed, asking for him to sleep with him. He went over to him and crawled up onto the bed to sit in front of the albino. He gently took the pale man's face into his hands and tilted it up to see him better. He had a look of dread on his features that made Ivan's heart ache.

"What's wrong?" he asked, but the albino just stared at him with those darkened pink eyes that were screaming something out to him, but Ivan didn't know what that something was. "You're not going to tell me, are you?" he sighed.

"I'm sorry." Gilbert spoke, but his voice was barely louder than a whisper. "I... was thinking about my brother." He continued, which surprised Ivan and he let go of the Elf's face. It wasn't a complete lie, Gilbert had been thinking about his brother, and how that on this holiday he should have just swallowed his shame and went home.

Actually, most of his thoughts now consisted of _'I should go home and stay home.'_ He was fighting with himself. He wanted Ivan but he also didn't want him. The want was too strong, though, and he would always instantly give into the Russian's comfort and affection.

"Why don't you go home tomorrow?" Ivan asked, and Gilbert took a second to process his question.

"I can't."

"Can't or don't want to?"

"... both."

Ivan sighed and leaned forward, giving a kiss to Gilbert's forehead. "I bet your brother misses you, just like my sisters missed me."

"I know I know, but I... I don't think it would be a good idea to see him."

"Why not?"

"... I told him that I wanted to find my own life, so I left home. If I go back with nothing then that makes me look like even more of a failure." Gilbert said.

Ivan stared at the albino in bafflement, complete and utter confusion. "You think you're a failure?" the smaller male stayed still and silent and it was answer enough for Ivan. The Russian took pale and cold hands into his own. "You're not. I don't know about your past but you came to the College eager to learn and you did, you survived jobs, and because of you, we have some info to get us started on defeating Neyvar, and well... you made me go from hating you to being madly in love with you. I'd hardly call that a failure."

Gilbert flushed and he found himself speechless and blinking frantically while avoiding eye contact with the Russian. He knew Ivan liked him but he didn't know that he was madly in love with him; just hearing those words made his heart ache and caused what felt like a vortex of butterflies in his stomach. The other things Ivan said were nice too but the love part stood out more because Gilbert could physically feel that love.

Ivan suddenly got on his knees in front of the other and took hold of Gilbert's shoulders, and he pushed the albino down so that he laid on his back with a soft grunt. Ivan loomed over the Elven male and put his legs on both sides of the other's narrow waist. Gilbert didn't have to say anything; his eyes did all the talking for him. Ivan could tell that he was asking what he was doing; those pink eyes were wide and showed a bit of fear even. Ivan leaned down and he heard the albino give a soft squeak and felt him twitch, but it didn't stop him. He kissed his cheek gently and continued down to kiss thin pink lips. Gilbert's body writhed just slightly like he had been aching to be kissed, which he had been. It was like a treat to him since part of him was saying not to get involved with Ivan anymore, but the other part wanted the Russian so badly that whenever he would kiss him, that one part just faded into the back of his mind and he didn't care.

Ivan broke the sweet kiss and planted more down Gilbert's jaw until he reached his neck. He gave a kiss to the little pool of his neck before opening his mouth wider and rubbing his tongue against Gilbert's cold skin. Gilbert twitched and felt his body get a sudden surge of warmth, and Ivan began to suck and lick more at the spot.

When Gilbert felt himself getting warmer he suddenly pushed up on Ivan's chest, breaking the contact. "No stop! I- I don't want to do anything..." he said, looking flustered.

Ivan smiled and kissed the corner of Gilbert's mouth. "It's all right, Gilbert; I wasn't going to try anything more. It's just been a while since I've touched you like this, so I wanted to." He said and pulled back to look at Gilbert. "Is it all right if I keep kissing you here?"

Gilbert nodded slowly, "I want you to." He admitted, which put a nice pink blush on Ivan's cheeks. Hearing Gilbert tell him what he wanted was always a big turn on, but he had to control that.

Ivan went back to kissing Gilbert's neck, nibbling gently and sucking until he made a nice mark on his milky skin. He chuckled to himself like he was proud of it, like he had marked Gilbert as his own. Gilbert was hoping that Ivan was done with his neck because having the Russian suck and nibble at his skin there was really making his blood flow to one specific place. He didn't want to be aroused, he didn't want to go there with Ivan yet, or at all, he wasn't sure yet, he just wanted to feel Ivan.

Soon the Russian was planting lazy kisses on Gilbert's lips, teasing him unintentionally. These kisses trailed off to his jawbone and eventually the Russian rested his body down on top of the other's, tangling their legs together, and buried his head into Gilbert's neck. He gave a soft kiss there again.

"Thank you for coming with me, I'm glad I didn't have to go a week without seeing you." The larger male mumbled.

Ivan's hot breath tickled Gilbert's skin and he shivered slightly from it. "Weren't you just telling me to go home tomorrow?" Gilbert asked and raised his arms to wrap them gently around the other.

"Yeah but I knew you wouldn't leave." Ivan admitted.

Gilbert chuckled weakly, his laugh being restricted by the weight of the other. "You're hopeless. And heavy." He said, grunting softly as he shifted his body.

"Ah, sorry..." Ivan apologized as he moved his body off of Gilbert. He laid next to him, keeping their legs intertwined and wrapped one arm around the Elf, pulling him closer. Gilbert buried his face and most of his body into Ivan, sliding one leg between the Russian's and moving his knee so far up between them that it made Ivan jump a little. The albino's hand wrapped around Ivan's torso and squeezed the fabric of his shirt on his back.

Ivan nuzzled his face into Gilbert's white hair, chuckling softly. "You're awfully cuddly tonight." He said. Gilbert would never cuddle back at the College; they never even shared a bed. It was a nice change to see Gilbert doing what he wanted.

"I'm cold, and you're warm." Gilbert mumbled as he shoved his face more into Ivan, his leg moving up a little.

The Russian smiled, "Maybe I can help more with that." He said and pulled the blanket over them both. Gilbert thought that Ivan meant by touching him, which a few seconds after being tucked in, he found that that was indeed the case. Ivan slipped his hand under Gilbert's shirt and rubbed at the skin of his back, enjoying how the albino arched his back into him a little. Ivan tilted Gilbert's face up to his and leaned down, taking him into a gentle kiss.

After breaking that kiss, he brushed some of Gilbert's bangs from his forehead and smiled. "Get some rest, all right?" he said and kissed the top of the other's head.

Gilbert nodded and nuzzled closer; he closed his eyes and enjoyed the feel of Ivan's warm hand on his skin.

/

Later in the week on a snowy night back at the College, Arthur had returned from his journey. He pushed open the front doors, made his way to Roderich's study where the brunet was sitting and reading a book before bed. He opened the door quickly, catching the man off guard.

"Arthur?" the man spoke with a tone of surprise, barely recognizing the man in front of him. He was covered in bandages, most noticeably around his head, covering his eyes. The blond walked to the chair opposite of Roderich and sat down, and then removed the bandages from his head. Roderich sat up more when he saw the look in Arthur's eyes; he wasn't looking at him, but passed him. He was blind.

"I've discovered some things you might be interested in hearing..." Arthur started, not blinking once.

* * *

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	10. I Wanna Live With You

**[Originally posted: 11/06/2013]**

•Silvarians is pronounced Sil•ver•rye•ans.  
•Ivan and Gilbert are dramatic angsty dorks and I love them.

.

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Angst, fluff, soft-core yaoi, dialogue heavy.**

* * *

Soon the week passed and members returned to the College one after another. Ivan and Gilbert were no exception and they too rode up to the stone arch that led to their second home. The week went well for them both. Gilbert got to know Ivan's sisters well and he shared stories of his life before he came to the College, though most of those stories were lies and it hurt that he had to tell them. He did mention his brother a few times over the week and it gave him a terrible sense of guilt for spending the holiday with Ivan's family rather than his own, but he just wasn't ready to return to Neirun yet.

After the two left their horses at the stable they headed toward the College. Some fellow mages waved to them with happy smiles as they passed, both men returning their greetings.

_'Now this is what home should feel like.'_ Gilbert thought to himself as he waved. He didn't let his thoughts be known, however, and he kept walking next to Ivan.

Inside there were more people standing around, chatting and sharing stories of their week with their families, some carrying their bags to their rooms and others already getting back to work.

Ivan turned to Gilbert, "How about we put our stuff in our room and then have a drink?" he said with a smile.

Gilbert couldn't stop from showing how pleased he was with this idea and grinned, "Sure, sounds good."

They began to walk down the hall toward their room, but as they were walking, a voice called out to them. "Ivan, Gilbert!" they turned and saw Antonio jogging over to them. "It's good to see you both made it back in one piece." He said with a bright smile.

"Same for you. Is Francis back yet?" Gilbert asked. It was rare to see the brunet without his blond partner.

"No not yet, he lives far to the south so he'll probably be back tomorrow." He said. "Anyway, I've been told to keep an eye out for you two, Roderich has been waiting for you."

"Again?" Gilbert said.

"What for?" Ivan asked, taking a step forward.

"Arthur returned while you two were gone, apparently he's got more info about you know who." He said. "It'd be a good idea to see him as soon as possible to see what's going on."

"You don't know?" Ivan raised an eyebrow.

Antonio shook his head. "Roderich is keeping silent about a lot of things; he doesn't want people to panic. He trusts you two the most, and thinks you're the best the College has. You guys might be in for a job sooner than you think, so I hope you got your rest while you were gone."

Ivan looked to Gilbert, "Looks like those drinks will have to wait." Gilbert gave a nod.

.

After quickly dropping their bags and weapons in their room, Ivan and Gilbert went straight to Roderich's office where they saw Arthur by the bookcase, running his finger along the spines of several old books, and Roderich sitting in his chair like usual.

"You wanted to see us, Roderich?" Ivan spoke up.

"Yes, and I'll skip the pleasantries of asking how your trip went because we have some things to discuss." Roderich said and stood up. "Please, take a seat, this is a little heavy."

The two listened and sat in the matching chairs in front of the brunet's desk.

"Arthur," Roderich spoke the blond's name and said man turned his head, but he didn't look at Roderich, he looked more toward Gilbert than anyone.

Gilbert noticed it too and it confused him. "What's wrong with him?" he asked.

"He's blind." Roderich said, glaring a little at the albino.

"Blind?"

"Yes, blind." Roderich repeated with some annoyance. "During his time away, he did some extensive research that unfortunately robbed him of his sight." He explained.

Arthur walked over. "I bet you're wondering how this happened, hm?" he asked, seeming to act just like his normal self. He gave the other two men a moment to reply but when they could only stare at the man, he continued. "This is what happens when you talk to the dead; the price for taking a peek at the afterlife. It's not very pretty there. It's dark and dreary. Just dreadful, really." He said, shaking his head subtly in disappointment.

Ivan and Gilbert felt uncomfortable with how easily Arthur described the afterlife, and how the man seemed to be disappointed that it _wasn't_ a tropical oasis. They couldn't do anything but stare in bafflement.

Arthur sighed heavily and leaned against the desk. "Did you guys forget how to speak or something?"

"I'm not sure what to say." Gilbert said.

"Well, you could start by asking what I found out while taking a trip to Dead-Ville." Arthur said. He was staring right at Gilbert with those dead eyes and it sent a chill down the albino's spine.

"All right... what did you find out?"

"Neyvar is not a dragon, but an Elf that long ago was blessed by a Goddess who was believed to be a dragon. He and a handful of his people were given the gift to transform into dragons like this Goddess and live forever; Beatrice was one of them as well." Arthur walked around the room as he explained. "There was a battle between these dragon-Elf people and the regular Elves that weren't given this gift of transformation, but rather something else."

Gilbert froze, _'My immortality?'_

"But that's not important. What _is_ important is that we know how to kill Neyvar; of course we need to _find_ him first. Roderich?" he looked to the other man.

Roderich cleared his throat. "Arthur discovered from Beatrice in the afterlife that the Elves who disliked Neyvar and the others created two stones, one red and one blue, that supposedly contain the blood of the Goddess herself and were created to kill Neyvar, which never happened. These Elves were called Silvarians who lived inside SilverMountain, the giant volcano on the island to the far north. However due to their isolation, when the volcano erupted thousands of years ago, it destroyed the entire race in a few minutes. We're thinking that the stones were kept locked within a palace deep inside the Mountain, so hopefully they're still there."

Gilbert listened to Roderich's words and he felt a tight knot in his stomach that made him want to vomit. He slowly raised his hand, shaking ever-so-slightly. "That's... the stones aren't there anymore..." he said and gained the attention of everyone in the room.

"What are you talking about, Gilbert?" Roderich asked.

"The Silvarians didn't die from the eruption- well, a lot did but... enough of them escaped, and..." He mumbled

"And? What is it Gilbert?" Roderich sat down.

Gilbert took in a shaky breath. "I guess history was scrabbled at some point. Roderich, you know the story: Neirunians lived on SilverMountain until the Great War and then were driven underground by the Empire. Those Elves were the Silvarians but we changed our name when we left the Mountain. I guess someone left some facts out of the history books."

"We?" Ivan spoke up and looked at Gilbert.

The albino looked terrified when he heard Ivan's voice. He craned his head toward him and gave a guilty and regret-filled grin. "Sorry, I'm not who I've said I am."

Ivan looked stunned, and also hurt. He didn't know what to make of the knowledge that Gilbert is a Silvarian, or Neirunian, or whatever the heck he is.

"So the stones are in Neirun?" Roderich asked.

"Yes." Gilbert answered, "Well, one is..." he said and then put his hand through the collar of his shirt. He dug around for a second and then pulled out his cross with the sapphire gem in the center. "This is one of them; at least, I think it is." He said. The stone was always part of the royal family and they were like treasures, so it made sense to him now why they were usually kept safe.

Roderich walked over to Gilbert and leaned down, looking intensely at the pendant in the Elf's hand. "Where did you get this? This is a royal artifact that's supposed to only be in the hands of-"

"_I know._" Gilbert cut him off, and then Roderich's eyes widened a little. "My family is nobility in Neirun. My father obtained it from the King before he died and he gave it to me years ago." He lied.

The brunet narrowed his eyes on the gem. "I see... well, at least we have one. However, Gilbert you _do_ know what this means right? You're going to have to get us the other stone from Neirun; you're the only one who can."

Gilbert leaned back in his chair and rubbed his temples, mainly to break his view of Ivan's face that was twisted with hurt, confusion, and betrayal. "I know, I know. I think I'll be able to get it. I'll leave immediately." Gilbert agreed quickly and stood up. He walked to the door but Roderich grabbed his shoulder and stopped him.

"You're not going without your partner; you've been here long enough to know that we operate in pairs." Roderich said.

The fact made Gilbert burn with guilt. He didn't want to bring Ivan to Neirun with him. He'd be lucky if Ivan even wanted to go anywhere with him now. He did just find out that Gilbert had been lying to him about so much.

"Fine," Gilbert said and ripped his arm away from the other. "I'll be in my room." He said and then left, letting the door close behind him.

Roderich sighed and let silence fall in the room before breaking it. He looked to Ivan, who looked overwhelmed and shocked. "Judging by your face, I can tell that Gilbert hasn't been honest with you, even after all this time." Ivan shook his head. "I'm sure he has his reasons, and I know you're upset about it but we need you two to bring back the other stone."

"I know, and we will." Ivan said, "Can I go now?" Roderich nodded.

Ivan stood up and left just like that. He walked through the halls, his pace picking up in curiosity and anger. He threw open the door of his room and slammed it shut, causing Gilbert to flinch violently at the loud noise and drop the bag that was in his hand.

Gilbert turned around just in time to have Ivan grab his wrists and pin him roughly to the stone wall. He looked up and saw violet eyes burning down at him.

"Why did you lie to me?" the Russian asked, pushing Gilbert's arms into the wall and pinning his body still with his.

"I-I-" the elf stuttered.

"Do you not trust me?" he kept questioning.

"What? No, I-"

"Do you not care about me? Do you not love me?"

Gilbert's eyes went wide and he noticed that the fire in Ivan's eyes had turned to something else. The two stared at each other, the Elf in shock and the mage hurt.

"Ivan, I..." Gilbert started, his eyes narrowing now. He tried to move his arms but the Russian still kept him in place firmly, squeezing his wrists tightly. "I... didn't tell anyone..."

Ivan breathed out and closed his eyes. _'He doesn't love me.'_ He thought. "Why?" he asked.

"Why what?"

"Why did you keep it a secret?" He squeezed Gilbert's wrists tighter.

"Ow! Ivan you're hurting me!" He shouted, "I lied because I didn't want anyone to know!"

"Why!?" Ivan shouted back.

"Because! I didn't want anything to do with there anymore!" he said and struggled against the larger male.

"Why?"

"It doesn't matter! Now get off of me!" Gilbert yelled and tried to push his body up against the other's.

Ivan still looked sad but he didn't move. He pressed his body harder to Gilbert's and let his head rest in the nook of the albino's neck. The gesture made Gilbert twitch a little and he turned away, not sure what to do.

Minutes passed and Gilbert's back was beginning to hurt from being pressed into the hard wall. "Ivan, I... I was scared to tell anyone." The Elf finally said, quietly.

The Russian turned his head just slightly, "Why?" he asked. He felt like it was the only question he could ask.

Gilbert took a breath and exhaled through his nose. "A lot of people hate Elves, especially my Sector. I left home to escape who I was, to make a new life, and I didn't want to share my past with anyone. I wanted you to accept me for who I am now."

"I can understand that, but... didn't you eventually trust me with something like this?" Ivan asked.

The Elf paused. "I wanted to. It killed me lying so much to you..."

"Are you keeping any more secrets?"

"... yes."

Ivan sighed and pulled back from the other. He looked deep into shadowed pink orbs and finally released the albino's wrists. He brought one hand up to Gilbert's cheek and stroked his knuckles against soft skin. "I'm sorry if I scared you, I just... care a lot about you, so it hurts to find out that I've been lied to."

Gilbert breathed out shakily. "I only did it because I didn't want you to hate me."

"I don't."

"I didn't want you treating me differently."

"I won't."

There was no winning. "Ivan... please let me go."

Ivan's eyes narrowed again and he pulled the other man closer to him, hugging around him tightly and burying his face into his neck. "I don't want to." He stated simply and childishly.

"We have to go..." Gilbert continued trying to get out, squirming slightly but also not wanting to move because he was warm, and he didn't want to hurt the Russian anymore, but he knew that he'd be hurting him again.

Ivan sighed and pulled back a little. He leaned his face down and gave Gilbert a soft Eskimo kiss, "I love you." He breathed out, and before Gilbert could do anything more than let a squeak sound in his throat, he was being kissed. It was soft and Ivan moved against Gilbert's slowly like he was memorizing every detail of his lips. Gilbert almost felt bad for kissing back, but he knew that if he didn't, Ivan would be even more offended. He needed to show Ivan that he did still care about him, even though it seemed like he didn't by lying. The words Ivan had spoken to him, 'I love you', rang in his head and he blushed. He wanted to say them back so badly, because he _did_ love Ivan. The past week with the Russian made it obvious to him and he couldn't fight that.

Soon Ivan pulled back from the kiss and he smiled softly. He knew he wasn't going to get Gilbert to say it back to him, and that was okay. "Please don't lie to me anymore."

"Ivan I can't-" Ivan put a finger over Gilbert's lips.

"You don't have to tell me the truth about the lies you've already told, just don't lie to me anymore." He said.

Gilbert thought about it for a moment, wondering if he could really get Ivan in and out of Neirun without lying anymore. He realized that when they return next to the College, Ivan will know that Gilbert is a Prince and that he's semi-immortal.

_'Should I just tell him now?'_ he asked himself as Ivan gazed at him, waiting for a reply. "All right, I won't lie anymore." He agreed.

"Good." Ivan gave him a quick kiss. "Shall we go visit your home now?"

Gilbert gave a weak nod, leaving a knot in his stomach.

.

The trip took a while. A full day of riding and one night camping in the woods, and riding nearly until the evening of the following day. Ivan had never been this far south before, and Gilbert was leading the way down a familiar path that he had walked after first leaving home. He had a terrible feeling in his stomach. He didn't want Ivan to find out that he is a Prince, not until he was ready, but what was worse was the immortality thing, and he wasn't sure he'd ever be ready for that.

Eventually Gilbert pulled Enea off the road and he trotted down a little path that led to the hidden cave marking the entrance of Neirun.

"What are you doing?" Ivan asked, looking around curiously when Gilbert suddenly dismounted his horse.

The Elf gave the other a raised eyebrow, "You once asked me what I meant when I said I'm used to being below ground. Well you're about to find out." he said and gestured with his hand to make Ivan follow him as he pulled Enea into the cave as well. Ivan quickly dismounted his horse and followed, bringing Riverwind with him. Ivan was as confused as he could be, not knowing that Neirun is an underground city.

Inside the cave, Gilbert stopped Enea before the platform that would bring them down into the city. He picked up a fairly large rock and set it down on the reins attached to Enea to keep her from going over to the platform.

"Put Riverwind's reins under the rock and then come over onto the platform with me." Gilbert said and walked away.

Ivan did as he was told and then walked to the Elf. Gilbert looked around him and pulled Ivan a little closer to him. "Hold onto me." He instructed.

"What?"

Gilbert narrowed his eyes in a slightly irritated glare. "I said, 'hold onto me.' Do you suddenly have a problem with touching me?" he asked with a sarcastic but playful tone.

"No, that's not it. I'm just confused. Why do I have to hold on?" Ivan asked.

"If I was certain you wouldn't lose your balance and crack your skull on the ground, I'd show you why, but because I don't want you having a concussion, just do as I say." Gilbert said, his tone drenched with dry humor.

"How do you want me to, uh...?" Ivan asked, feeling a bit flustered.

Gilbert groaned and bluntly grabbed Ivan's wrists and turned around. He pulled Ivan flat against his back and wrapped the Russian's arms around his belly. "There, just hold on tightly. Tense your muscles too, it'll help." He said.

"Help what?" Ivan asked, blushing a little from the position he was in with the Elf. He could feel the slight curve of Gilbert's ass through his thin clothing.

Gilbert only smiled and placed his hand on the podium in the middle of the platform. The albino's hand began to glow a light blue color and the platform under them could be heard creaking. Ivan blinked curiously at the Elf's hand, wondering what was happening.

There was a bright flash of bluish-white light and Ivan then let out a _very_ uncharacteristic yell when the platform suddenly dropped under them and they were plummeting down a long, dark shaft under the planet's surface. Ivan's arms tightened around the albino and Gilbert couldn't help but laugh.

"What's the matter, Ivan!?" Gilbert shouted over the sound of howling wind and the platform screeching against the walls. "You look a little pale!"

"You Elves are crazy!" the Russian retorted, actually feeling some fear, which was something he didn't feel often.

Gilbert laughed a wholehearted laugh that Ivan felt vibrate through his body. It was nice to see Gilbert laugh like that, but he knew it would soon disappear when they got to Neirun; there was something there that Gilbert wanted to forget, and Ivan had a feeling that they would be running across that something.

Soon the platform started to grind to a halt and made a deep _thud_ as it pressed into the ground.

"So that's how you get home?" Ivan asked as he slid his arms off of Gilbert.

"Yep." Gilbert answered simply and walked off the platform. "Now do you see why I told you to hold on?" he asked with a grin.

Ivan nodded with a smile and followed the other. Gilbert lead Ivan through the cave and after turning a few bends and walking for minutes, they walked out into an opening, the city of Neirun in their full view and spanning the width and height of a large underground cavern.

Gilbert heard Ivan breathe out some words in a different language, but he assumed it was some awestruck saying judging by the wide eyes and agape mouth the Russian had. He was staring ahead of him and trying to memorize every detail of the beautiful sight. The blue-ish white stones, how the entire place seemed to glow brightly, how the large palace in the back almost reached the ceiling of the cavern.

"Well, what do you think?" Gilbert asked.

"It's beautiful..." Ivan breathed out.

"Yeah well, try spending your life down here and you'll eventually miss the sky." Gilbert said and started walking toward the large main gates. "Come on."

As they neared the gates, some guards on the walls spotted them and began to wave, but Gilbert made a sweeping gesture across his neck with his hand and the men stopped and simply began to open the gates. Ivan didn't question it, thankfully.

Gilbert knew this wasn't going to be easy. As soon as they entered the city, people turned to them and began to whisper. Gilbert bit his lip and suddenly turned to Ivan, he leaned close so his body touched his just slightly. "We're going to run for the palace in the back. Keep up and don't stop unless I do." He whispered.

Ivan nodded. He had half a mind to steal a kiss from the albino right then considering how attractive he was when he whispered and acted so demanding.

The Russian did as told and soon the two were running through the city. Ivan was surprisingly able to keep up with the fast and agile Elf, and Gilbert just kept his focus on the towers in the distance. Somewhere inside there his brother was sitting, not knowing that his older brother was returning, and for what? A stone to stop the world from being enslaved or destroyed by Neyvar. Would Ludwig be angry that this was the reason bringing Gilbert back?

Gilbert slowed down, taking on a jog and then hopping to a stop. Ivan caught up and the two looked ahead. A large arch leading into a courtyard was in front of them.

"Are you sure we can just go in?" Ivan asked, panting a little as he looked toward the albino.

Gilbert looked up at the towers. "You can't, but the guards will recognize me and let me in." he turned to Ivan. "I want you to stay in the courtyard until I get back, okay?" he said.

Ivan was about to refuse but when he saw the look of dread in Gilbert's eyes, like he was begging the other to listen to him, he lost his will to refuse and simply nodded.

"Thank you. I'll try to be quick." Gilbert said and then walked toward the palace.

Gilbert reached the doors of the palace and he felt his heart beating fast in his chest. He was incredibly nervous to see how his brother would react to seeing him. However, he swallowed his fear and gripped the handle on the door and walked in.

Everything was just how he remembered it was. The hall was lit with candles and blue carpets rolled down the halls, even the cushioned seat by the door was right in the same spot as always.

"Prince Gilbert!" a guard shouted and jogged over to him.

Gilbert gave him the same hand gesture he gave the guards in front and the man instantly straightened up and nodded. "Where's Ludwig?"

"The king is in the meeting hall, speaking with some nobles."

"Thank you." Gilbert said and began to walk.

"But, sir! It might not be a good idea to bother-" Gilbert turned around and shot him an annoyed glare. "Ah, b-but I'm sure he won't mind, you are his brother after all." The guard stuttered a nervous laugh.

Gilbert said nothing more and simply went on his way.

He walked to the meeting hall, where two men were standing guard by the door. They both gasped at the sight of their Prince and saluted. Gilbert groaned and brushed them off and pulled the door of the hall open.

Inside there was a small group of 4 people in front of Ludwig. Gilbert stopped dead in his tracks upon seeing his little brother sitting there dressed in his fancy blue and red robes. Something just froze him, like he wasn't supposed to be here. All these thoughts entered his mind of what he'd say to him, and what Ludwig would do. He lost sight of the reason why he was here in the first place and he felt sick, he wanted to turn around and run away again.

Ludwig was speaking to the people with a smile on his face, and he caught a glimpse of someone else in the room, he shifted his eyes up and they widened. He didn't even hear the person in front of him speaking anymore. Gilbert felt his brother's eyes on him and they chained him to the floor.

Ludwig suddenly stood up and the nobles in front of him watched in shock. "Everyone leave." Ludwig ordered. "There's something else I have to do right now, we'll work something out later."

"But your highness-" the man shut up when Ludwig gave him a cold glare. He swallowed roughly and followed the others out of the room. They saw Gilbert standing there and only a few recognized him.

Gilbert watched them all walk out and he sighed. He heard footsteps pick up their pace and just as he turned back, Ludwig slammed his body right into his, throwing his arms around him and holding him tightly. Gilbert wobbled on his heels and he caught his balance, he waited a moment before wrapping his arms around his little brother.

"Hey little bro, how are you?" he said quietly and then pulled back, he smiled down at the blond.

Ludwig had so many emotions flowing through him he wasn't sure which one to project first. Something then caught his attention and the blond brought his hand up and pulled on a lock of Gilbert's hair, causing the albino to wince a little.

"You cut your hair again." Came the strangely casual comment, like all of those emotions disappeared and like Gilbert never left to begin with.

Gilbert chuckled. "Not by choice." He said and shared a smile with his brother. "Ludwig, as great as it is to see you again, there's something I need to talk to you about."

The blond tilted his head just slightly, questioning what the albino had to say.

"I came here with my partner from the College, we have to talk to you about something important that's happening on the surface, but he doesn't know I'm a Prince, nor that you're my brother, so could you, uh..." he mumbled to a stop.

"Say no more. Until you explain your situation to him, you are just another Elf, I'll inform the guards. Meanwhile, bring your friend in." Ludwig said.

Gilbert nodded and smiled, and then suddenly took his brother into another tight hug. "I missed you a lot." He said. Ludwig smiled at the albino's words and returned the hug.

.

Gilbert peeked out the front of the palace to see Ivan admiring some of the flowers in the courtyard garden.

"Psst! Ivan!" the albino called out in a hushed shout. The Russian turned when he heard his name and he saw his partner waving him over. Ivan stopped looking at the strange flowers and went over to the albino. Gilbert let him slip inside and closed the door behind him. "Follow me." Gilbert said and began walking back to the meeting hall. Ivan admired the inside of the palace just as he had the outside; he was simply stunned by how beautiful this place was.

Ludwig was back in his seat after informing as many guards as possible about Gilbert, and just in time to see his brother and his partner come into the hall. The two walked up to Ludwig, stopping just before the floor went to steps up to the throne.

Ivan noticed the crown on the blond's head and realized that he was the king. Immediately he leaned down to bow, and Gilbert blinked at him but then realized that one would bow to a king, so Gilbert joined Ivan on the floor and bowed to his own brother.

"Stand." Ludwig instructed and the two men stood up instantly. Ludwig looked to Gilbert. "You mentioned something to me about the surface world?" he asked.

"Yes, your grace." Gilbert said but couldn't help the tiny grin that took his lips, it reminded him of when he was younger and he would entertain Ludwig's fantasy of being king, because he knew the oldest would be crowned. Funny how that one turned out. "I'll explain it to you in full."

Gilbert proceeded to do just that. He told Ludwig about Neyvar being a real person and not just a myth like they had been raised to believe, and that he was returning to either destroy the planet or enslave it, they didn't know which. He also explained that they needed the two stones with the Goddess's blood in them.

Ludwig removed his crown and turned the front toward himself. He looked at the deep red gem on the front that always looked like it had a small swirling vortex in it. Ludwig always thought his eyes were just playing tricks on him or that it was how the gem was carved.

"You really think you can defeat Neyvar?" Ludwig asked.

Ivan spoke up. "The College has enough firepower to stagger him, and with the stones we'll be able to kill him." He said. "We also have mages and warriors back at the College working on strategies for when we find him."

"And do you have any ideas of where to start looking?" the king asked.

"Not yet," Gilbert said and crossed his arms. "but we'll think of something. Everyone messes up somewhere; we'll find his somewhere and break a hole in it."

Ludwig smiled and closed his eyes. "Very well, you may take the stone from the crown." He said and held it out. Gilbert gave a bow and walked up to his brother and took the crown in his hands.

The albino reveled for a moment. He was never allowed to touch the crown since only the kings were able to. He smiled, and looked up to his brother. "Thank you, your highness." He said and slid the crown into his bag.

He wasn't angry about not being king anymore. He was happy with where his life was taking him, because wherever that was, Ivan would be there too.

"You two look tired from your trip. Please, stay and rest for the night or as long as you need before returning to your College."

Gilbert looked uneasy about the proposal, but he knew that riding for so long without good food and rest would be hard on them. "Thank you, we'll accept that offer."

"Also, feel free to raid the armory. Take whatever you need. Weapons, armor, anything. If it'll help you during the battle, take it." Ludwig said and stood up. "I'll tell the cooks to prepare a meal and later baths for both of you."

"You really don't have to do all of this..." Gilbert said, giving his brother a pair of guilty eyes.

"I do." Ludwig said simply and walked away. "Gilbert, you know where the rooms are, show your friend to them and relax until dinner is done."

Gilbert's eyes widened a little as he watched the blond walk away.

Ivan placed a hand on the albino's shoulder. "How do you know where the rooms are?" he asked.

Gilbert swallowed roughly. "I used to come here a lot, remember? To play with the young Prince, plus my father would-" He stopped, catching himself lying again. "No, I can't do this." He said and grabbed Ivan's wrist and began pulling him toward the stairs. "Come with me, I have to tell you something."

.

Ivan stuttered Gilbert's name several times before the Elf finally pulled him into a dark room. Gilbert closed the door and walked to a desk where there were two stones sitting. He picked them up and knocked them together over some candles and lit a few of them so that the room lit up enough to see well.

"Gilbert, what's going on?" Ivan asked as he watched the albino pace around the room. "You're tense."

"Sit." Gilbert instructed and pointed to the bed. Ivan did as he was told and sat down on the edge of the soft mattress. Gilbert stopped pacing and took a deep breath, exhaling it audibly through his parted lips. "You told me that I didn't have to tell the truth about the lies I already told, but I want to come clean about everything." He said and looked to Ivan, who seemed to be listening attentively, his violet eyes fixed on the other. "First though... how did it feel to meet royalty like that?" he asked.

Ivan blinked in confusion but then thought about it. "It was weird, but also really cool. Royalty is different than nobility on the surface, so it was different."

"I see..." he breathed out again and let a forced chuckle escape his lips. "You've known royalty for longer than you think, Ivan." He said. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest, the thud echoing in his ears.

Ivan tilted his head. "What are you talking about?"

The Elf let his fear-filled pink eyes met curious purple ones. "The king, he's my little brother."

The sentence left a dead silence in the room. The two just stared at each other for what felt like minutes when it had only been seconds. Ivan shook his head a little, showing his disbelief and confusion.

"Your little brother? So, that would mean that... you're..." he pieced it together.

"Remember that prince I told you about who ran away?" Gilbert grinned out of guilt and pointed both of his index fingers at his face.

Ivan's jaw dropped a little and another silence took the room. Gilbert stood there, waiting for the other to react. He was running out of composure though and he wanted to yell at the other to say something, the silence was killing him.

"Why did you keep it a secret?" Ivan asked.

"Why?" Gilbert repeated in a shaky laugh. "When I first came to the College, do you think you would have treated me better or worse if you knew I was a prince?" he gave Ivan a moment to answer, but the Russian said not one word. "Either way, I didn't want that. I just wanted to be treated as me. I didn't want people to give me special treatment because I'm royalty, and I especially didn't want you treating me differently because of it." he said.

Ivan suddenly stood up and walked to the Elf. Gilbert couldn't move, like the Russian's eyes froze him in place. Ivan reached him within a few steps and brought his hand up to the albino's cheek, stroking his knuckles against his skin.

"I won't treat you differently now that I know. I didn't fall in love with the prince." He hugged around the Elf, and gave him a soft kiss to the cheek, which made Gilbert's heart skip a beat. "I don't care if you're a prince or a peasant or an Elf or whatever else, I will love you no matter what." He leaned in for a kiss on the lips but Gilbert dodged it and covered his mouth.

"I can't." he said.

The words annoyed Ivan and he roughly pulled Gilbert to the bed and forced him down. Gilbert struggled against him but soon found himself overpowered by the larger and stronger male. Ivan pushed Gilbert's wrists into the mattress and moved between his legs so he couldn't move.

"Get off of me! This isn't funny!" Gilbert shouted as he pushed up on the Russian's chest. If he wanted, he could easily use his magic to force the other off of him, but in a way, he felt like he deserved the anger that Ivan was directing at him.

"Tell me why, then!" Ivan yelled back. "Why won't you even let me kiss you now!? What do you want, Gilbert!? Tell me!"

Gilbert's eyes went wide and he felt them sting with tears. Being yelled at by Ivan was painful, especially since he didn't even have an answer for him, but Ivan was in just as much pain and Gilbert could tell by the look in those gorgeous violet eyes. Ivan saw the tears forming and he brought his face down and kissed Gilbert's cheek softly, but the Elf just twitched away. Ivan kept going and brushed his lips against the corner of Gilbert's mouth before giving him a weak kiss on the lips, closing his eyes gently.

"Immortal..." Gilbert mumbled into the kiss.

Ivan pulled back a little when he heard the whispered word and looked down at Gilbert. His face was twisted with sadness, his eyebrows pulled together tightly and his eyes tearing up more.

"What?" Ivan spoke quietly.

"I'm immortal." Gilbert forced the words out and wheezed softly. "Well, not exactly. I'll live to 600 or 700 years, but..."

"That's why you didn't want to get involved with me..." Ivan breathed out softly and looked taken aback. Gilbert nodded weakly, and Ivan sighed heavily and leaned his forehead against the albino's. "I'm so sorry..."

Gilbert forced a smile, "It's not your fault I fell in love with you."

"It is a little... but that's not what I'm sorry for." Gilbert tilted his head a little. "I don't think I can let you go, even knowing this." He said.

"Ivan-"

"No Gilbert, stop." Ivan hushed him by putting his palm over his mouth. "I _love_ you. I'll _never_ love another like I love you. I'm being selfish, but I want to live the rest of my life with you, even if that means you'll have to watch me die."

Tears seeped over Gilbert's eyelids and rolled down the sides of his face. "I don't-" he mumbled under Ivan's hand before he gently pushed it off. "I don't want to feel the pain of watching my lover die and have to live hundreds of years after."

"Please, Gilbert..."

Ivan's voice broke Gilbert's heart, hearing his name begged so pitifully from the Russian's mouth tore away at his will. "Think about what you're asking of me..."

"I have." Ivan said and kissed Gilbert's cheek. "I've also thought about the fact that we could die within the next few weeks during the battle. We could die tomorrow, so I want to enjoy _this_-" he poked his finger to Gilbert's chest directly above his heart, "for as long as I can."

Gilbert found some sense in what the Russian was saying. There was no telling when either of them would die. It was true that Ivan was more likely to die first if life went smoothly, but their life wasn't smooth and Gilbert had nearly died several times already. So why not just savor every second he could have with Ivan until the last breath was drawn?

The Elf closed his eyes and let out a heavy sigh. "All right." He finally said.

Ivan's eyes widened, "All right?" he repeated, his voice went a little higher with hope.

"I'll be yours until the day I die."

The words brought a happy smile to Ivan's face and he leaned down, taking the albino into a kiss that he had been repressing; his way of saying thanks. Gilbert wrapped his arms around Ivan's shoulders and pulled the Russian down on top of him more. Ivan welcomed it and let his hands roam down the Elf's sides, groping gently and pulling a few moans of appreciation from the other.

Soon however, the kiss turned from loving and soft to rough and hungry. Ivan licked at Gilbert's bottom lip and the Elf immediately allowed him entrance. Ivan let out a soft growl when their tongues touched. He loved how Gilbert tasted, how he moaned softly at the touch, and how his body writhed up against his like he just couldn't get close enough. He wanted this for life, and he would fight to keep it.

Gilbert began to thrust his hips up into Ivan's, moaning quietly as he felt his groin begin to stir to life. Ivan pulled out of the hot and wet kiss and gave a teasing lick to the albino's upper lip.

Gilbert panted out a little and tightened his arms around the other, "Hey Ivan... since we might die within the next week or so, shouldn't I give myself to you...?" he suggested as his face flushed softly. He ran his fingers through the Russian's ash-blond hair and pushed his hips up a little.

Ivan smiled softly. "I would love that, Gilbert." He said and Gilbert immediately pulled the Russian down into another kiss, eager to start. Ivan let it last for a few seconds before pulling back. "But... I don't want to have sex with you just because we might die. I want our first -_your_ first- to be special."

Gilbert pouted a little. "You're really going to risk letting me die a virgin?"

Ivan chuckled and gave the albino an Eskimo kiss. "At least then I'd know that no one else could ever have you."

"That's a little morbid, don't you think?"

"Just wait until we meet in the afterlife then." Ivan grinned, which made the albino blush a little. "How about this: the night we defeat Neyvar, I'll make love to you and I'll do whatever you want."

"_If_ we survive." Gilbert chuckled through a dark blush and butterflies in his stomach. He liked the term 'making love' rather than 'fucking' or just 'sex'; it made him feel cherished.

"What do you say, Gilbert?" Ivan asked, stroking the albino's reddened cheek.

"I say... that I would love that, Ivan." Gilbert smiled and leaned up a little to give a sweet kiss to the lips of his Russian partner.

* * *

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	11. This Is It

**[Originally posted: 11/10/2013]**

Second to last chapter, I'm excited and sad.

.

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Soft-core yaoi, suggestive themes, angst, slight language.**

* * *

The next morning, Gilbert took Ivan to the armory to see if there was anything they could bring back to the College and use during the battle that was nearing. It was a strange feeling and both men felt it. The months prior to this day, even after knowing about Neyvar, seemed to just blend in with the rest and feel normal, but now, all that was left is to find the bastard and pump him full of goddess blood and hopefully be rid of him. It was finally coming down to the wire and it put Gilbert on pins and needles.

There was just something about knowing that there was going to be a battle, and the reality of the fact that one or both of them could be dead by this time next week was starting to sink in, and Gilbert was regretting his words last night. He wished he could go back in time and rethink leaving Neirun to begin with. It was great meeting and falling in love with Ivan, he loved that feeling, but now... now he has to suffer losing him. He loves Ivan, but he wondered if love is worth the pain he'll feel when Ivan becomes just a memory and no longer a physical person he can touch.

That's why he wanted to give himself to Ivan last night, because he wants to know what it feels like to be fully and completely loved, he didn't care if it would have hurt, maybe it would have been better if it did. At the same time, though, maybe it was best that he didn't get to find out at all. It was already painful enough just thinking about losing Ivan.

He wished he could just get out of this but he was stuck. One way he would lose Ivan and wouldn't be able to have him like he wants, and the other way he would get him but then lose him later down the line and suffer that loss.

Ivan glanced over his shoulder at the albino who was running his fingers along the arrowhead of a finely crafted arrow - he looked deep in thought. Actually, Ivan had some of the same things on his mind as Gilbert did, though he was mostly worried that he had offended Gilbert by denying him last night, but he was also thinking about how selfish he was being by forcing Gilbert to be by his side for 50+ years and then just leaving him on his own.

A small part of both of them almost hoped that Gilbert would die first.

.

"Hey Gilbert?" Ivan spoke up once the tension was thick enough to taste.

The albino twitched a little and stabbed his finger with the end of the arrowhead, letting out a hushed 'Ow!' when he did. "Yeah, what is it?"

"I wanted to, uh..." he stopped when Gilbert looked right at him. He blushed a little, not sure if it was okay to bring up what happened last night.

"Ivan?" Gilbert called out to him.

"I'm sorry. For last night."

Gilbert tilted his head. "What about last night?"

"I denied you when you wanted sex..." Ivan whispered out.

The albino's eyes widened a little and he took a few seconds to understand, but then he suddenly burst into laughter, which caught the Russian completely off guard.

"Why are you laughing?" Ivan asked, nearly stuttering in confusion.

"Because! You're so cute, that's why!" Gilbert continued to chuckle and Ivan's face turned a brighter red. Gilbert wiped some small tears from his eyes as he made his way over to the other male. He smiled sweetly up at him. "It's okay; you're allowed to deny me that. Besides, it's not like I wanted to do it out of lust." He said.

"Isn't that worse though? You wanted to be close to me and I refused..."

"Ivan, I said it's okay." Gilbert said and sighed, "Maybe it's better that we didn't get to do it, you know?" he said, looking up into Ivan's eyes.

The Russian understood perfectly. It hurt hearing the words but he knew that getting close to Gilbert right now and consummating their love is probably a bad idea. "I understand, maybe we should just... hold off on everything until Neyvar is dead."

Gilbert's eyes narrowed, also not liking the idea either. "Yeah..." was his only reply. He turned and walked over to a table that had weapons sprawled out on it. "Hey Ivan, do you think we should bring some things back for the others?" he asked and then turned back to the Russian.

Ivan was a bit shocked that Gilbert was so easily able to accept not being romantic with him. Even if it was for the best, he had a strong urge to kiss the Elf. It was like before when Gilbert told him not to touch him, he was forbidden to him, something he wasn't allowed to have. He hated that just when he got him, he had to let him go.

He swore to himself that he was going to find Neyvar and kill him, and then that night after celebrating with the College, he'll take Gilbert into his arms and make love to him, slowly and passionately. He is going to show the albino how much he adores him. No interruptions, just him and his beautiful Elven prince tangled together and becoming one. Just the mental image of Gilbert's naked body shining with sweat and moaning out Ivan's name and begging for more was enough to-

"Ivan." The Russian shook his head quickly upon hearing his name, realizing he was lost in a rather sexy daydream. His eyes refocused and he saw Gilbert standing there, his bodyweight leaning on one leg and holding an axe in his hands. One thin white eyebrow was cocked up and he looked amusingly skeptical.

"What?"

"You're getting hard." The Elf stated bluntly with a grin.

Ivan blushed and he looked away from the other. "Can you really blame me? We agree that we can't be close so of course my mind does it for me."

"You really have no self-control, y'know that?" Gilbert teased as he put the axe down and picked up a quiver of arrows from the table.

"And _you_ do?"

Gilbert spun around to face Ivan, "Well, am _I_ getting an erection?" he asked with a tone of humor in his voice, motioning with his hands in a way that made Ivan's eyes go right to the albino's crotch.

"I don't know, it's kind of hard to tell with your pants on."

The Elf sighed, "No. Get rid of it and try to find something to bring back. Ludwig will get pissed if we don't." he said.

Ivan sighed and forced the sexy images of Gilbert out of his mind and joined the albino in searching.

Gilbert picked up a long handled double bladed axe and hummed to himself for a second. "This is the kind of weapon that Antonio uses, right?" he asked.

Ivan looked over. "Yeah." He answered and sighed, "Do you really think we should bring stuff back to the College?"

"I'm guessing Roderich will send a few of the College's best to fight Neyvar, and Elven weapons are light but durable, so I think it'd be a good idea." He said, "Besides, we don't have much use for weapons down here, the only way to get into the city is by that shaft we came down, and only Neirunians can power it."

"Which means Neyvar could be here, right?"

Gilbert gasped softly, "... I never thought about that. He could be, but I doubt he'd hide within the new city with the people who hated him." He said.

"So do you have any ideas of where to start looking?" Ivan asked.

The albino bit his bottom lip as he thought. _'If I were him, I'd want to be somewhere with no one around, and...'_ he gasped a bit louder, "Silver Mountain." He whispered in realization and turned to Ivan.

"You think he's there?"

"Why wouldn't he be? That's his home. If you think about it, Neyvar was innocent up until he decided he'd try to blow up the world; he was given the gift to transform into a dragon and then was shunned by his own people, so why not return home when those people were gone?" he explained. "It's isolated, hard to get to, and no one even tries to go near it because of the sharp rocks surrounding the island, and then you have the bad rumors about the place. It's perfect for him to hide until he attacks."

Ivan thought Gilbert made sense, "Do you know how to get to the mountain?"

Gilbert walked over to a large hanging map on the wall of the armory. He pointed to a roughly sketched-in green area. "The College is here, so..." he dragged his finger up and Ivan walked over next to him. "If we head north through the forest, we'll eventually hit the ocean where we can see the mountain in the distance, then we can head north-east from there by boat."

"So we need a boat." Ivan said. "Is there a port town nearby?" he asked.

"Maybe along the coast farther north, we'll have to see. I'm not familiar with that area up there and this is an old map, it doesn't even have any of the cities labeled on it."

Ivan narrowed his eyes a little and looked at Gilbert out of the corner of his eyes. "Gilbert, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, sure."

"How old are you?"

Gilbert froze for a moment and then chuckled a bit nervously. "Don't worry, I'm not old. Actually, I'm only 25. Being totally honest." He said.

"Will you always be 25?"

"In your lifetime, yes." Gilbert said sadly. "We're not totally immortal like vampires, like Vincent. We'll die eventually. Our life-spans are basically that of a human's, just stretched over about 700 years. Of course, our immune systems fail overtime, which is why most Elves down here die between 600 and 700." He explained.

Ivan suddenly hugged around the other from behind. "I'm sorry for everything, and for touching you when we're not supposed to."

"It's fine, Ivan, it's just a hug." He chose to ignore the other things Ivan was sorry for. "We should finish gathering the weapons we can carry back with us."

Ivan slid his arms off of Gilbert. "I found some armor earlier, could I take that?"

"Take whatever you want." Gilbert said and lifted a sword, gazing at the shiny sharp blade.

_'If I could, I'd take you.'_ Ivan thought and sighed. He walked over to the other side of the room where he found the armor from before. It was light and tough, just like Gilbert had said. The armor was made from the same stone as most everything else down here, a bluish-white color with light blue shimmering streams running through it. He lifted it up and over his head, letting the armor rest on his body loosely.

"How do I look?" Ivan asked with a small grin.

Gilbert laughed and went to him. "It's a little small for you but it'll work better than anything else you have." He said as he tightened the straps together for Ivan.

"Thanks." Ivan said, "What are you going to wear?"

"Actually, I made an outfit years ago that I never wore much. It's light and really easy to move in. It's all white so that'll look interesting on me."

"You in all white is a nice picture."

"Please control yourself Ivan." Gilbert groaned softly. "I don't need you getting your head cut off by Neyvar because you were staring at my ass."

"Right, sorry." He apologized.

.

Ivan took from the armory two long swords and the double-bladed axe as well. Gilbert stocked up on arrows and brought more bow strings in case his would break and the two left the armory.

Gilbert led Ivan to the very top of the palace, the room in the tower that almost touched the ceiling of the cavern. Ivan sat on a small loveseat and gazed out the window at the city below, still finding himself in complete astonishment at the beautiful sight. Gilbert was behind a changing screen and changing into the outfit he spoke of before.

"All right, what do you think?" Ivan heard from behind him and he turned to look. His jaw dropped a little when his eyes landed on the albino.

Gilbert was dressed in all white, with the exception of the brown straps around his stomach to hold the top together and around his thighs for dagger holsters. The top was tight and sleeveless and the neck cut down to just below his collarbones. The shirt was just a tad too small for him and if he lifted his arms at all, a good inch of milky white skin would be revealed. The pants were pretty much the same, with a brown belt around his waist, and _boy_ were those pants tight. He also wore his brown knee-hi boots that were laced up and knotted tightly at the top.

Gilbert smiled and walked to Ivan with a bit of a hop in his step. "I take it I look good?"

"More than good." Ivan swallowed. "You look beautiful."

Gilbert wasn't expecting that compliment and blushed softly. He smiled, stepped closer to the other, and wrapped his arms around Ivan's neck,

Ivan looked confused. "Gilbert?" he inquired, wondering what the albino was doing.

"We'll let this one slide." Gilbert whispered out and pressed his lips against Ivan's, his pink eyes sliding shut.

The Russian welcomed the kiss and returned it eagerly. After a second though, Ivan brought his hand up to the back of Gilbert's head and tangled his fingers loosely in the white locks at the nape of his neck. He moved his lips slowly against the albino's, savoring every little movement of those pale pink lips. He wanted this kiss to be special, not hot and heavy like most of their kisses were.

He knew that this could possibly be the last kiss he ever has with Gilbert, and he didn't want it to go to lust.

The two never broke the kiss and learned to breathe through their noses, not wanting to let the moment end, but Gilbert soon felt like if this went on any longer, he wouldn't want to stop here. So he pulled back and opened his eyes, but he quickly felt himself regretting the kiss because Ivan's expression was broken and sad. Gilbert breathed out through his nose and took Ivan's face into his palms, resting his fingers gently against the Russian's warm skin.

"We'll get another one like that, I promise." Gilbert said, rubbing one thumb under a purple eye.

"Please don't make promises that are out of our control to keep." Ivan mumbled.

"Right... I'm sorry..." Gilbert let go of Ivan and moved back. He felt his front grow cold once the Russian's body wasn't close to his anymore. It matched how Gilbert felt. Cold, like ice. It was so _painfully_ ironic that a weak and pained huff of a laugh escaped his lips.

He grabbed the matching white cloak for his outfit as he walked to the door of the room. "We should go. The quicker we get back to the College, the quicker we can find Neyvar, and the quicker everything will be over." He said and left, not waiting for Ivan.

The Russian thought about Gilbert's words just now and he hated how it sounded like Gilbert was hoping for death. No, no it wouldn't be better if he or Ivan died. He didn't care if Gilbert had to suffer when he died, because he'd suffer if Gilbert died too, he'd suffer if he couldn't have him. It was better to live life while they're alive and enjoy each other while they can, right? They only get one life, and he wanted to spend it with Gilbert, and he planned to do just that.

Ivan soon caught up with Gilbert in the hall and when the Elf looked up at him, the Russian was smiling softly at him. Gilbert didn't quite understand why he was being smiled at, but he hoped that it meant Ivan found some peace with their deal. He hoped he'd be able to come to terms with it too. He couldn't bring himself to smile back, not yet.

.

The two found Ludwig in his room. Ivan thought it felt weird to just walk into a king's room without knocking or anything, but then he remembered that to Gilbert, Ludwig wasn't a king, he was his little brother.

"Are you leaving soon?" Ludwig asked to his brother, who answered by giving a single nod. "I see... well, be careful." Ludwig said.

Gilbert gave a weak smile and walked to his brother, taking him into a tight hug. "I promise to visit when the battle's over."

Ludwig smiled a little and returned the hug. "Thank you, Gilbert."

The albino pulled away and then began to dig into his bag. He pulled out the crown and looked at the red stone. "We don't need the entire crown, just the stone." He said and handed the crown back to Ludwig.

The blond took it and smiled. He went to a desk in the room and opened a drawer, pulling a small dagger out. He carefully pried the stone off of the crown with the blade and went back to Gilbert, placing the smooth gem in his brother's pale hands.

The two shared a smile and then hugged once more before Gilbert finally said his goodbyes. As he and Ivan were getting ready to walk out of the room, Ludwig called out to Ivan. The Russian turned to the king and blinked curiously.

"Thank you for taking care of my brother." The blond said, Ivan's eyes widened. "I know he can be a pain, but he has a good heart. Good luck to both of you."

Ivan nodded and gave a bow. Gilbert stood to the side and watched Ivan, mentally thanking him as well for all he's done.

.

Walking out of the palace and through the city toward the entrance was painful. Gilbert couldn't keep his mind off of the idea of never seeing this place again and he kept looking behind him, hoping he could burn the image into his memory, like it would come with him to the afterlife.

Before they knew it they were at the gates, walking through and heading to the tunnels. Soon they were at the lift and Gilbert had his hand on the podium again. Ivan wrapped his arms tightly around the Elf like he had before and buried his face into Gilbert's neck, holding on like he didn't want to let go. The entire time they were rising up toward the surface, Gilbert felt like crying, he thought he might if he didn't have Ivan holding him so tightly.

The lift slowed to a halt and Gilbert removed his hand from the podium and looked over to their horses. The animals began to bray and thrash around. When Gilbert tried to move, Ivan's arms tightened around his belly and held him in place.

"Ivan let go, we have to go." Gilbert said reluctantly.

"I don't want to." The Russian mumbled into Gilbert's neck.

"Ivan this isn't what we agreed on, we- we can't do this or anything until the battle is over."

Gilbert felt the other's arms slip off of him and he felt incredibly guilty. It must seem like he hates Ivan, which was the total opposite of how he really felt. He walked to his horse and removed the rock from the reins, and pulled some food out of one of his bags and began feeding Enea. He handed some food to Ivan, who fed his horse as well. After, Ivan attached the several weapons to Riverwind, using the extra straps on the saddle to hold them in place. Gilbert did the same, attaching his bow to Enea's side along with his bags.

The albino grabbed the reins of his horse and began pulling her out of the cave, Ivan following close behind. As soon as the two got out, Gilbert gasped, his mouth hanging open a little.

"It's snowing." He said, and smiled in pleasant surprise.

"You match it." Ivan said, looking over to his pure white partner. Ivan had a thought: _'He's like the image of innocence and purity.'_ And in a way he was. Gilbert was untouched. He's loyal, strong, kind, loving... though he did have a bit of a mouth on him and seemed to be getting feistier by the day, but it didn't matter because all of these things are what made Ivan fall so deeply and unconditionally in love with him.

Gilbert chuckled a little at the comment, and then mounted his horse. "Shall we go?" he asked, actually managing to smile a little. Ivan nodded and mounted Riverwind, and soon the two were galloping side by side down the snowy road.

Riding through snow wasn't difficult or uncomfortable; it wasn't until they stopped for the night when Gilbert began to shake from the cold. Ivan convinced him to cuddle close to him and let him warm him with his magic. Ivan stayed by his side, letting the small flames in his hands illuminate Gilbert's clothing and skin. He was happy that he could do this since he was sure that Gilbert wouldn't cave on their 'no touching' agreement this time. However, this was an emergency, he had to keep Gilbert warm or else the Elf could get frostbite. Even Gilbert knew that and he cooperated quite easily when Ivan wrapped his arms around him and held him close. After all, he didn't really _want_ to stay away from Ivan.

Soon the morning sun pierced Gilbert's eyes and he blinked them open, feeling them resist due to the bright light. He found it rather uncomfortable to sleep on the cold hard ground with a large Russian resting half of his body on top of his. Gilbert took this moment, though, to admire Ivan's sleeping face. He was attractive, and combining his looks with his sheer physical strength and possessive loyalty to Gilbert just made him incredibly sexy. However Gilbert's mind began to wander to darker places and a question popped into his head.

_'What will this face look like in 20 years? Will he be upset that I'll look exactly the same then as I do now?'_ he wondered. He didn't want to think about it; after all, he could be dying soon so there wasn't a point in worrying about it.

He began to gently shake the Russian to consciousness, softly calling his name as he did so. Ivan stirred awake, groaning irritatingly and then tightened his arm around the albino next to him, rolling on top of him more. Gilbert groaned Ivan's name and pushed against the Russian's chest. Finally the man off of him.

"I was warm." Ivan complained childishly.

"I was too but we have to go, remember?" Gilbert asked, patting the Russian's shoulders gently.

The larger male sighed, "I know, but I just wanted to-" he stopped when he felt Gilbert's fingers in his hair. "Gilbert?" he asked, blinking in confusion.

The albino seemed lost in adoration as he gently rubbed some of the ash-blond locks between his fingers. His eyes were narrowed a little, like he was focusing hard on what was in front of him.

"Gilbert?" Ivan said again and placed his hand over the albino's.

The Elf snapped out of his trance and blinked a few times, shifting his eyes away from the other. He said up, his back to Ivan. "Sorry. We should go."

Ivan's face fell in sadness and he wrapped his arms around the other's waist. "You have nothing to be sorry for, but I want you to talk to me." He said.

Gilbert stayed quiet for a moment and just when Ivan thought he wasn't going to get the other to talk, the albino spoke. "I'm thinking about the future." He said. "Like 20 or 30 years into the future. I want to grow old with you, not stay the same as I am now."

Ivan's arms tightened around the smaller man's belly. "Do not think about that. Think about today, and next week. The future is unpredictable, so don't try to look into it." Ivan said and placed a loving kiss to the skin of Gilbert's neck.

"You don't think you'll hate me in the future?"

Ivan chuckled softly, "No. You're mine, remember? Don't go back on your word after just one day." He said.

Gilbert sighed, "You're right, I'm sorry. Besides I can't be distracted by this right now anyway, we have a battle to fight." He said and tried to move, but Ivan just pulled him closer to his chest.

"Don't think about it ever, just enjoy life with me." He said, giving the other another kiss, this time to the skin behind his ear.

This kiss made Gilbert blush softly and he found himself hating how sensitive his ears were. He shifted a little, pulling on Ivan's arms. "Really, we have to go..." he said, wanting to get up and leave before Ivan continued kissing him and delayed them even further.

Ivan whined softly but let the other go. He stood up and stretched, and Gilbert mimicked him. Sleeping on the ground really sucked, he only hoped that his body wouldn't be sore when it came time to fight.

After feeding their loyal steeds and quickly eating themselves, Ivan reequipped his armor and Gilbert wrapped his white cloak around himself again, and the two began riding once more, side-by-side down the snowy road.

.

.

Night began to take the world just as they neared the College. They rode through the arch and down the bridge before pulling their horses to a stop and leaving them at the stable. They went inside, momentarily enjoying the warmth that shook the cold from outside. There wasn't a single person in view, so they made their way down to Roderich's study and knocked on the door. They heard the man say "come in" from the other side and they did just that.

Roderich stood up instantly, "You're back. Did you get the stone?" he asked, not wasting any time.

Gilbert smiled proudly and patted his bag, "Yep, quick and easy."

Arthur let out a mocking chuckle. "You didn't steal it from the royal family, did you?"

"No they handed it over pretty easily." Gilbert jabbed back, even though it was every bit true as it could be.

Ivan spoke up, "Gilbert has an idea of where we can find Neyvar." He said.

"Really? Arthur had some ideas as well. Let us discuss them and see if we can come to an agreement." Roderich said and took his seat. "Tell us your idea, Gilbert."

"I think he's hiding at SilverMountain." He said as he took a seat as well, Ivan following close behind.

"Really? That's the first place Arthur thought of too."

"It makes sense," Arthur said, "plus when I had that chat with Beatrice, she said that Neyvar would 'go to his origins', and the Mountain is where he was born."

"Should we check it out then?" Ivan asked.

Roderich put his hand to his chin. "It's our best lead. The afterlife gave us a hint, and Gilbert himself believes Neyvar to be there... so, yes, we'll set out for Silver Mountain as soon as everyone is prepared."

"Who exactly is 'everyone'?" Ivan asked.

"You two, of course. Antonio and Francis will be extra support, Elizaveta too. Arthur and myself will come as well to provide medical treatment where we can. They've all been briefed about the situation and have agreed to fight." Roderich said.

Gilbert narrowed his eyes. _'It was bad enough that Ivan and I might die, but now all of them could too...'_ he thought.

"Arthur and I will figure out a way to get to the Mountain, meanwhile, you two should get your rest and eat well tonight. We're leaving tomorrow."

Gilbert's heart quickened. Hearing the words frightened him, even though he was preparing for this moment, it was actually happening now.

Tonight could be his last night.

.

After the meeting with Roderich and Arthur, Gilbert and Ivan brought the weapons they got from Neirun inside. Francis and Antonio were ecstatic to have such amazing weapons in their hands. Antonio whipped his new double bladed axe around with ease, claiming that it was much lighter than his other one. Francis gave a few swings with the long sword and then ran his hand down the blade, grinning at how sharp and shiny it was. Gilbert was glad that Ludwig let them bring these back, though he didn't know how much good it would do up against Neyvar.

Later everyone met in the dining hall for a large and delicious meal and to boost morale for the coming battle. Francis and Antonio were energetic as always, but deep down they were worried, just like everyone else. Gilbert sat next to Ivan and for most of the feast he stared at his plate of food. Ivan had to beg him to eat, even though the Elf didn't want to at all. He forced himself to, and forced a smile, and forced like he believed that they would al survive.

.

Soon it was just Ivan and Gilbert in their room. Gilbert sat on Ivan's bed while the Russian sat in one of the chairs across from him. There was another one of those silences that made it almost hard to breathe, where even swallowing their own saliva was audible. Gilbert shifted nervously, not because of the silence, but because Ivan was staring at him intensely. It made the Elf almost feel like he was naked and on display, those violet eyes just burning a hole in him.

"Stop staring at me..." the albino finally mumbled out.

"I don't want to." The other replied simply. "I want to memorize every detail about you."

Gilbert blushed and closed his eyes. _'He wants to memorize me?'_ he asked in his head, and suddenly got an idea of stripping his clothes off so Ivan could _really_ memorize him, but he didn't want to seem like he was trying to seduce Ivan now. Though Gilbert had to admit, the thought of giving into lust and feeling nothing but pleasure sounded heavenly right now.

Possibly their last night in this world and they were sitting in near silence.

Gilbert suddenly jumped up and clenched his hands into tight balls. "I can't take this anymore!" he shouted, causing Ivan's eyes to widen in surprise. "We could be _dying_ tomorrow and I refuse to just sit here and wait for it to happen!"

Ivan stood up and went over to the albino who was now starting to shake. He wrapped his arms around the Elf and Gilbert instantly leaned into him. He started crying, which only made Ivan hug him tighter.

"I know, and I'm sorry. I know I could make you feel better but I really don't feel comfortable with doing that."

Gilbert buried his face into Ivan's chest. "I know, and I should be happy that you're like this, and I know I said we can't do anything but I don't care anymore..."

Ivan pulled back and kissed the albino's forehead. "Why don't I give you pleasure, but not sex?" he suggested.

Gilbert shook his head. "I want us to feel good together."

Ivan smiled with a chuckle. "You're so generous." He gave a kiss to his cheek. "Tell me what I can do then."

Gilbert nuzzled closer to the Russian. "Can you sing to me, until I fall asleep?" he asked.

Ivan was surprised that Gilbert wanted such a thing. "Sing?" the Elf nodded, "I can sing in Russian, if you'd like?"

"I don't care, just sing." Gilbert grumbled.

Ivan led the albino over to his bed. Gilbert laid down and Ivan sat up against the headboard and let Gilbert snuggle close to him. The Elf rested an arm over Ivan's body and nuzzled his face into the Russian's belly. Ivan tucked the albino in and gently stroked his hair and down his back.

He then began to sing softly. Gilbert didn't know what he was saying at all but it sounded like a lullaby and it instantly made him feel a bit sleepy. For someone as big and tough as Ivan, he sure had a soft and sweet voice, but somehow Gilbert thought it fit him perfectly.

Soon Gilbert was snoring ever-so-quietly and Ivan began to nod off as well.

.

"Ivan, Gilbert... wake up." Gilbert heard their names being said as he slowly regained consciousness, and then he was suddenly _very_ aware of the fact that he was cuddled right up against Ivan's side with their arms around each other, and that someone else was standing in their room. His eyes shot open wide and instantly locked onto the other person.

It was Roderich, which relieved Gilbert a little; Roderich would likely not question the scene he has in front of him.

However, just as soon as that relief came, Ivan tightened his arms around the albino and nuzzled into his hair, which made Gilbert's face light up a bright red. Roderich was beginning to grin, mainly because he never knew that Gilbert was so easily flustered. Of course, he also didn't know that Ivan and Gilbert were something of an item.

Roderich leaned down a little so that Gilbert could fully see his little grin. "Can I trust you to wake your boyfriend and meet us in the dance hall in 30 minutes?" he asked, enjoying how the Elf recoiled slowly when he heard the word "boyfriend."

Gilbert gave a weak nod and Roderich smiled. "Good, be fully prepared too, we're leaving as soon as you're ready." The brunet turned and left the room, leaving Gilbert to sigh heavily, his face still burning hotly from embarrassment. After a few moments, Gilbert turned to Ivan and smiled softly at him. The Russian always looked so peaceful when he slept, and it actually hurt Gilbert to try to wake him.

However, after a few gentle shakes and whispering the Russian's name, Ivan stirred awake, groaning softly but then smiling when his eyes opened to the sight of his favorite person.

"Good morning, love." Ivan mumbled out and lit Gilbert's face on fire again.

"Don't call me that! And we have to get up; Roderich told us to meet in the dance hall in 30 minutes." Gilbert said, scooting himself away from the Russian as he sat up.

"When did he say that?"

"Like 2 minutes ago when you were still sleeping." Gilbert said.

Ivan grinned, "So he saw us sleeping together?"

"Don't look so proud; just be happy it wasn't Arthur who saw us."

Ivan raised an eyebrow, "Gilbert, he went blind, remember?"

"Oh, right..." A sudden wave of guilt hit the albino. He shook it off quickly and pushed the blanket off of his body. "Come on, Roderich will be mad if we're late."

Sadly, Ivan knew that Gilbert was telling the truth, but he really didn't want to leave this warm bed with the man he loves to go and fight some crazy ancient Elf who can turn into a dragon, but... he had to.

.

Nearly everyone who stays at the College was standing in the dance hall. Everyone who was going to Silver Mountain today was standing at the end of the room on a small stage, waiting for Ivan and Gilbert. Once the two joined them, Gilbert nudged Antonio's arm.

"Where's Elizaveta and Arthur?" he asked.

"They already left. They headed north to see if they could find a boat in town for us." Antonio whispered back.

Just as Gilbert was about to speak again, Roderich cleared his throat.

"Good morning, everyone. I trust that you all know what is happening, so I'll skip a touching speech and get right to the point. The people standing up here with me are going to Silver Mountain today to try to defeat Neyvar. We might fail and we may die but we will-"

"We _won't_ fail!" Gilbert suddenly shouted and stepped out from the line of warriors. Ivan whispered his name and tried to get him back in line, but the Elf simply shrugged off his touch and looked angry.

Roderich stared at the boy in shock. Of all people, he didn't expect Gilbert to be confident that they'd win. "Do you have something to say, Gilbert?"

Gilbert narrowed his eyes, "I refuse to die today. I only have one life and I refuse to let Neyvar take it."

Roderich noticed a certain fire in the Elf's eyes, one that he once saw in Ivan's eyes when he first came to the College. "Very well, Gilbert. Lead us to victory." He said with a smile. _'You've become a lot like Ivan, haven't you?'_ he thought to himself, realizing that the two men were a lot closer than anyone had thought.

Gilbert looked around and noticed that everyone in the room was looking at him. Ivan stepped up next to him and looked to the Elf. "Lead the way, partner." He said with a smile. Gilbert's eyes widened and he looked to Antonio, Francis, and Roderich. They were all looking at him with smiles on their face.

Gilbert took this moment in, let it sink deep down. They were waiting for _him_ to lead. He then pulled on the strap of his bow, tightening it around his chest, and jumped off the small stage that they were all standing on. Ivan jumped off the stage as well, joining Gilbert. The two began walking toward the door together and the others followed suit. They marched out of the room together, and for the first time they felt confident that none of them would die today.

* * *

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	12. Fire and Ice

**[Originally posted: 11/24/2013]**

Well here we are, the last chapter of 'Equilibrium'. Enjoy.

.

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Soft-core yaoi, fighting, violence, OC death, blood, character injury.**

* * *

The ride north was long and cold and it only got colder. Roderich eventually took the lead with Ivan and Gilbert following close behind him, Francis and Antonio trailing them. After a few hours of twisting and turning through the forest, the group came out onto a road along the shore that curved up to a small town. All of them stopped for a moment to look at the mountain in the distance. It gave them a sense of impending doom and that confidence of winning was quickly beginning to fade.

Roderich took a deep breath and continued on. The others followed him, turning their backs to the mountain.

Arriving in town, they quickly found Elizaveta and Arthur. Even though the blond had gone blind, he seemed to be able to tell where everyone was now, like his other senses gave him an advantage. The two were standing by the docks facing the mountain, where there were tons of boats lined in the water.

"Did you find a boat?" Roderich asked after dismounting his horse.

Elizaveta nodded and turned, and pointed to a decent sized row boat in the water. "It's the best I could get from the townspeople. They don't like the idea of people going to Silver Mountain and refused to give us a better one."

"It'll do." Roderich said and then turned back to the group behind him. "Alright, everyone gather your things and get in the boat."

Gilbert wrapped his extra quivers around his back and made sure that his bow was attached securely to him. He also made sure to bring some healing ointment in his bag just in case. Ivan took a few moments to gather his sword and make sure that his staff was on his side. He joined Gilbert after a moment and smiled softly down at him.

"This is it." Ivan whispered out. "No matter what happens on that mountain, I will always love you."

Gilbert stared expectantly at the Russian, and suddenly a tiny grin split his lips. He leaned up, standing on his tiptoes, and gave a gentle kiss to Ivan's lips. "No matter what happens." He repeated.

The words made Ivan's heart swell, but he sighed after reveling in the moment. "Let's go."

The others were already in the boat and were too busy to have noticed the two share their kiss. Ivan stepped into the boat and took a seat in the front, he held out his hand for Gilbert and the Elf took it, letting himself be helped down into the small boat.

"Everyone ready?" Elizaveta asked, she was at the back of the boat. Everyone nodded, and she gave a rough push to the dock, making the boat move forward. Antonio and Francis began to paddle since they were in the middle and they began their sail to Silver Mountain.

.

Minutes passed and the island somehow seemed even farther away. Antonio and Francis were running out of strength and everyone could tell.

"We won't make it like this." Francis complained.

"Just keep paddling, we'll get there eventually." Roderich replied. Both of the two men paddling groaned loudly.

"I have an idea." Gilbert stood up, causing the boat to wobble slightly.

"What are you doing, Gilbert? Sit down before you flip us over." Roderich said.

"I can move the water around us and push the boat toward the mountain, it'll be better than these two wasting their strength on rowing, and faster too." He said.

"But what about you? Shouldn't you save your magic?"

"I don't need to use magic for this." He said and walked to the front of the boat.

Gilbert swept his hands to the side and for a moment everything was silent. That silence was soon replaced with soft gasps from the others when the boat was suddenly jerked forward.

"What are you doing?" Roderich asked again but Ivan placed his hand on the brunet's shoulder.

"He's moving the water under us. It's a Neirunian thing, or maybe a Silvarian thing. I don't know." Ivan said.

Roderich accepted this answer, though still a bit uneasy with how quickly they were approaching the mountain.

After a few minutes, Gilbert looked back at the others, "Hey, uh, I don't mean to spoil this nice cruise, but do we actually _have_ a plan to fight Neyvar?"

"Yes, we'll discuss it when we get to the island." Gilbert began to refuse but Roderich shushed him and told him to just get them to the mountain.

.

The ground of the island was covered in ash that swept up in dust around their feet when they walked. Gilbert took the first step and he could feel the magic in the mountain still, it was the same feeling he got back in Neirun, a rush of energy.

"Alright, everyone listen up and I'll explain the plan we've developed." Roderich said and called everyone to huddle close.

The brunet began to explain how the group was to operate. Gilbert and Ivan will follow behind Antonio and Francis until they find Neyvar. Then, Ivan and Gilbert will separate from them and while the other two are distracting Neyvar, they will attack.

"How are we getting the blood from the stones?" Gilbert asked.

"Good question, Gilbert." Arthur said and pulled one stone out of his bag. "We're going to melt them down into liquid and then coat your weapons with it, and then you'll go about stabbing Neyvar until the blood has gotten in his bloodstream."

"There's a catch though... for the blood to be fully effective, both stones must be used against Neyvar within 2 minutes of each other..." Roderich added.

"So we just have to be quick." Gilbert said and looked to Ivan with a confident grin.

"Very quick. You two have to work together more than you ever have. Can you do it?" the brunet asked to them.

"We don't have a choice." Ivan said, though he knew he could work with Gilbert.

"Good answer." Roderich said and stood up. "Alright, Ivan you melt the stones, everyone else make sure your weapons are-"

Something shook the ground, and then everyone's attention was turned toward the top of the mountain when they heard a loud roar.

A dragon came shooting up from the volcano and began circling around it, almost like he was taunting them. He stopped and hovered in midair for a moment and eyed each person who was invading his mountain.

"Looks like he knows we're here." Gilbert said as he lifted his bag around his shoulder. "We should get moving."

"Alright. Ivan, melt the stones and then you four head for Neyvar. Arthur, Elizaveta and I will follow behind at a distance." Roderich said.

.

That was the plan and it sounded simple enough, but everyone knew it wasn't going to be. After a few minutes of carefully melting the stones into liquid and bottling them, Ivan and Gilbert began following Antonio and Francis up the mountain. Arthur, Elizaveta, and Roderich followed at a distance, making sure they covered a larger area together. The caves that spiraled through the mountain were dark and cold and it took hours before they reached open air. However they still weren't at the top, so they delved back inside and continued, trying to locate the dragon who called this mountain his home.

Deep in the mountain, the group came to a dead end. They stopped and looked around, becoming annoyed that this was being dragged out even longer. At this rate, they'd all be too tired from climbing the mountain to even fight.

As everyone else was looking around for an exit, Gilbert walked close to the wall that stopped them; he could have sworn that he heard something near it, like a howling or whistling. _'Wind?'_ He thought and pressed his hand to the cold stone and dragged it down, kneeling down as he did. Eventually his hand slipped off the wall and into another area. He looked back at the others.

"Ivan, hand me the torch." He said.

Ivan walked to him and gave him the flaming stick. "Did you find something?"

"Maybe." The Elf said as he took the torch. He moved the flame under the section of elevated stone and looked under. He was right, this small passage led into another area. "There's something on the other side of this wall. I can feel wind, so I'm guessing it connects to the outside somewhere."

"Can you see what's under there?" Roderich asked

"No, it's too dark right here. I can go under and check?" he suggested. Roderich nodded.

Gilbert ducked and crawled through the small opening in the wall and he looked around. It was dark, but the light from outside lit the room enough. There was a large hole in the center of the top of the ceiling. Gilbert guessed that he was in the center chamber.

He leaned down and whispered under the wall. "Alright, it's clear." He said.

The others then moved under the wall as well and joined the albino. They all stood up and looked around, spreading out a little to get a better sense of the large room they were in.

"Be careful of the ledges, and watch where you step." Antonio said.

Gilbert looked at him, "Why?"

"Because I can see holes scattered in the ground."

Ivan let out a small chuckle. "We don't want you falling down another one."

Gilbert gave him a glare and began walking, but he did make an effort to watch his step.

The path they were walking narrowed down and just barely allowed two to walk side-by-side, luckily a larger area was ahead and they found themselves in the center of the room. Gilbert glanced up and looked around curiously, looking hard for anything. They were nearly at the top of the mountain, so where was Neyvar?

Suddenly a light blinded them, Gilbert being the first to open his eyes again. He blinked a few times and squinted, and then gasped when he acknowledged a figure standing on a cliff a little up the side of the wall.

"Hey." Gilbert said lowly, gaining the attention of everyone. They all looked up at the person before them.

He was tall, with what looked like long black hair down to his tailbone. The man rocked on his heels for a moment, looking somewhat amused as he took turns glancing to each of the people in front of him, until his eyes landed on Gilbert. The light reflected in his eyes and caused them to shine brightly, the green of them almost frightening.

"You are an Elf like me..." he started, taking a few slow steps to the side. "Why do you bear weapons against me?"

Gilbert didn't reply at first, thinking he wasn't supposed to answer. It was a pretty stupid question. "I'm not like you, and if you didn't decide to destroy the planet then I wouldn't be here." He said.

"The party hasn't even started yet and you're already here to crash it? Perfect." Neyvar said, twirling his body around a little. "I do not wish to destroy the world, but purify it." He said, "You _humans_ are weak, even you, a Silvarian, have lost all but a fraction of your power. The inhabitants of this world were shown the power of Elves, dragons, and immortality, and they pushed it away. They pushed _me_ away. You know what that's like, right? To be shunned and hated because you're different?" he paused to let his true words sink into the albino. "Come with me and see what we can do together. You do not belong with humans, your eternity will outlast there's, but _we_ could be together forever."

Gilbert glared up at the other, growling under his breath. "Sorry, my eternity is already booked." He said. He heard the others behind him step forward, forming a line with him.

Neyvar returned the glare for a moment but then shrugged playfully. "Very well, I will be waiting." He spread his arms and was suddenly engulfed in black smoke. Before the group could react at all, a dragon flew up from the smoke and up through the room and out of the mountain.

Without speaking a word, the group ran forward, led by Gilbert, toward what looked like a hall. It led to a set of stairs that spiraled up toward the surface. They readied their weapons as they ran and swallowed any last fear they had.

This was it, and it was now or never.

.

Neyvar circled above them, taunting them with flips and twirls. None of them knew who took the first shot, it seemed like they all charged at once. Gilbert ran quickly toward the dragon, loaded an arrow and let it rip. His first arrow hit and stuck, but didn't phase the large scaly creature. Ivan threw fireball after fireball. The two were the only ones with ranged attacks. Antonio and Francis were just running in circles hoping the dragon would land so they could attack. It would have been comical if it wasn't life and death.

Gilbert ran over to Ivan. "Do you have a plan to attack him?"

Ivan thought for a moment but quickly remembered something. "Didn't you attack Beatrice in the air?" Gilbert's eyes widened a little but he nodded. "Whatever you did to get in the air back then, do it again." He said.

"I don't have enough strength to do that."

"You have to, and I can help you." Ivan reached down to his side and wrapped his fingers around the small staff he always carried. Suddenly it grew in his hands and Gilbert seemed utterly shocked. "There's no time to explain, just use your magic and get up there. We have to make sure you get close enough to pierce him completely with the arrow, otherwise the blood won't work. Try shooting him in the mouth."

Gilbert rolled his eyes but mentally agreed. "Easy for you to say, I don't want to end up as dragon food." He joked a bit nervously. He whipped his hand down toward the ground and suddenly a pillar of ice shot from it. It spread around into a small platform and Gilbert stepped onto it, ice cemented around his feet to keep him from falling. The ice lifted him into the air a little when he twitched his hand slightly.

"Give me a boost?" he smiled a little, and Ivan nodded.

The Russian positioned the staff in front of him and fused his magic with it. "Be careful." He whispered to the albino, who just looked over his shoulder at him with a grin.

And then Gilbert was soaring through the air, his ice forming behind him and curving after the dragon.

_'Whoa... this isn't even draining my magic.'_ Gilbert thought. It felt easy and like he wasn't even trying. However, he kept his focus on the large dragon that was now looking at him like he was waiting for him.

Gilbert neared him and shot off several arrows, riding along his ice skillfully. As he fought in the air, down below on the ground Ivan tried to distract Neyvar with more fireballs. It seemed to work for the most part, but it was unnerving seeing Gilbert that close to the dragon.

The thought of his first impression of Gilbert came rushing back to him. He thought he was weak and pathetic, someone who couldn't even ride a horse properly, but now... now he was up there, facing a huge dragon that could snap him in two without blinking and wouldn't hesitate to do so either. Gilbert was anything but weak and pathetic, and Ivan loved seeing Gilbert so confident in himself.

Just as he got lost in his thoughts, he heard a loud cry from above, his eye caught something fall and hit the ground. Gilbert's bow. His heart skipped a beat when he looked up.

The dragon's jaws slammed down on Gilbert's arm and he cried out in pain when he felt the large fangs dig into his skin. He was hanging from the dragon's mouth by just a section of his arm. His hand loosened around his bow and it fell from his hand, falling to the ash-covered ground below. He glared into the giant green eyes of the black dragon holding him in the air.

"YOU CAN GO TO HELL!" he shouted through the pain and lunged his other hand forward, an arrow in hand and drove it through the bottom of the dragon's chin so it came out inside the center of his mouth, the blood on the arrow entering his bloodstream.

The dragon let out a loud, pained, growl, but tightened his jaw down on Gilbert's arm more. The Elf hissed in pain and began to punch the dragon wherever he could, but the sharp scales on his face just cut through his skin and left his hand bloody. The dragon didn't let up, and suddenly a loud snap sent Gilbert into a scream. The dragon seemed amused by the twisted look of pain and anger on the Elf's face, and he slowly took his fangs out of his skin. Gilbert's eyes hazed over, feeling like he was going to faint. He slipped from the dragon's mouth, plummeting down toward the ground.

He landed in a small bush that broke most of his fall but he rolled down the mountain a little ways until his body slammed into a tree, pulling a grunt from his lips.

The group ran over to him, Ivan right at his side. He noticed the misshapen, bruised, and bloody look of the Elf's arm and he cringed at how much he probably hurt.

Roderich knelt down next to him, "Gilbert are you alright?"

"'m fine." He mumbled out weakly. "The blood- it's in him. Finish-" he coughed, "Finish the job."

Roderich nodded and turned to Ivan. "Ivan, get up that mountain and finish him off. He should be injured and the blood will revert him back to his Elf form. Kill him, make _sure_ he's dead."

"What about Gilbert?" Ivan looked concerned and disapproving of the idea of leaving him.

"You don't have time for this!" Roderich yelled at him. "Francis, Antonio! Go with Ivan and do as Gilbert said, finish the job!"

Without looking back, Ivan made his way toward the top of the mountain where Neyvar had retreated to.

_'I have to kill him. For the world. For Gilbert.'_ Ivan thought. _'He's fought so hard till now, and I promised him I'd make things as good as I can, and I'm not about to let one of us die on this damn mountain!'_

It took a while to climb, but eventually they reached the peak. At the top of the mountain, Ivan's eyes landed on Neyvar in his Elf form. He was collapsed on the ground. The Russian carefully made his way over to him. Francis and Antonio following a little behind. They trapped him and surrounded him, and when he realized it, he began to stir. Suddenly he threw a flaming green ball toward Antonio and it hit his leg. The brunet's leg lost feeling and he went limp but he was trying as hard as he could to stand.

Ivan glared at the Elf in front of him, who stood up onto his feet now. "Don't make me take out the blond too." He threatened. Ivan shifted his eyes to Francis; he was closer to Neyvar than he himself was so it would be easier for him to attack, but easier to get hurt as well.

"You humans are so weak, so concerned for anyone other than yourself." He laughed and wiped some blood from his chin. He looked at the blood and noticed the burning feeling it left on his skin. "Goddess blood, huh? I guess I overestimated you. Thanks to your Elven tramp you actually managed to gain the upper hand." He grinned at the fire his words lit in Ivan's eyes. "Just wait, one day when you're nothing but bones in the ground, I'll find that Snow Elf again and show him what immortality really means."

Francis looked at Ivan, confused. "Gilbert is immortal?"

"Not now, Francis." Ivan shot back.

"So, his name is Gilbert?" Neyvar hummed amusingly. He glanced to the two standing men and then sighed. "Well, I _obviously_ can't fight like this, so I'll be making my escape now if you-"

Suddenly Antonio's axe flew toward Neyvar and cut his leg deep. It knocked him to the ground again and Antonio crawled to him. Neyvar threw a punch at the brunet but he dodged, and gave him a few punches himself.

"Ivan! Ivan kill him!" Antonio yelled toward the Russian as he struggled to keep Neyvar still, he then grunted when Neyvar kneed him in the stomach. Francis went to action as well and ran to the two fighting; he built up a kick and landed it right into Neyvar's jaw, disorienting him for a moment. The two men lifted the struggling Elf but the goddess's blood was shutting down his strength and soon he could do little more than wiggle in their grasp.

Ivan walked up to him and looked down at Neyvar. "I was going to shove my blade through your heart, but I think..." he pulled the small bottle of blood from his pocket, "I want to see you suffer." There was pure hate and fire in his eyes. The way he talked about Gilbert, how he hurt Gilbert and wanted to destroy the world, or "purify" it, so he says. It all made Ivan's blood boil and he wanted to make this Elf hurt.

There was a fear in Neyvar's eyes that wasn't present before. He didn't know they had the other stone, and in his condition now, death would not come easily. Ivan walked closer and popped the small lid on the bottle off.

"Be a good boy and drink all of it, yeah?" Ivan growled and then forced Neyvar's mouth open with his hand and then shoved the opening of the bottle between his lips. Neyvar struggled, but against Francis and Antonio, and now Ivan holding his face, he had no choice but to let the blood flow down his throat.

It wasn't long until Neyvar's body began to convulse violently. "You can let him go now." Ivan said, and the other two looked at each other and nodded, letting their hands loosen from Neyvar's arms. The Elf fell to the ground and began to cough violently, blood spraying from his throat and splattering small red spots on the pale tan ash.

Ivan watched in satisfaction, Neyvar fully deserved this. He murdered Beatrice, one of his own kin. He hurt the man he loves, and that alone was reason enough to enjoy how the Dragon-Elf was shaking and twitching.

"You two head back to Gilbert and get us prepared to leave. I'll make sure _he_ doesn't live." Ivan said. The look in the Russian's eyes was one that the other two didn't want to question, so they followed his order and left. Francis helped carry a limping Antonio back down the mountain as Ivan was left alone with Neyvar.

Ivan knelt down to the pain-shocked Elf. "You said before that you wanted to show Gilbert what immortality really means, what did you mean by that?"

Neyvar refused to talk for a moment, but his stubbornness wore off when he realized that he was done for, so why not humor the man who killed him? "To live forever. Never stop aging, learning and seeing a new world arise from the old... that is what immortality is."

"You're wrong." Ivan said bluntly but calmly, his previous anger subsided. "True immortality is being remembered throughout time. As long as one person remains with a memory, that memory will last forever, it will never die."

Neyvar chuckled, blood spraying from his pale lips again. "You are human, what do you know of immortality..."

"I know enough, and now you will disappear, and no one will speak of you again. You will truly die here." Ivan said and brought out the dagger that Natalia gave him long ago. "Goodbye, Neyvar." He said and then slit the Elf's throat cleanly.

.

"Where is he? Where's Ivan?" Gilbert mumbled, now wrapped in bandages and his stomach full of pain-killing potions. He, along with the others, was already in the boat and ready to head back to the mainland.

"He's fine; he wanted to kill Neyvar himself." Francis said.

"And you left him alone with him!?" the albino yelled and then coughed roughly.

"Calm down Gilbert, you need to rest." Elizaveta said. "You still have poison in your veins and your arm is broken and covered in cuts." she forgot to be gentle when she forced him back down to lay against some bags.

Gilbert grumbled incoherently. "Why is everything always poisoning me." He complained.

"At least you're alive, isn't that what's most important?" Roderich asked.

Gilbert shifted his eyes away and avoided answering the question.

After a few silent minutes, Francis stood up. "Look, it's Ivan!" he shouted and began to wave at the mentioned Russian.

Ivan smiled a little and waved back, but when his eyes fell on the beaten and weary looking Gilbert, he made a dash for the boat.

"Is he alright?" he asked as soon as he neared them.

"He's fine. He got poisoned again when Neyvar bit him and his arm is broken, a few ribs as well but he'll be okay." Roderich said.

Ivan let out a relieved sigh, "Then let us leave this place."

.

Ivan sat next to Gilbert once they set off from the island. He smiled down at him and allowed the injured Elf to rest his head on his lap. The rest of the group didn't bother them; it wasn't that hard to figure out how close they were by just looking at them, and especially after their rocky start, it was painfully obvious.

"How do you feel?" he asked in a near whisper.

Gilbert shrugged, and instantly regretted it when a sharp pain shot through his broken arm. "I'm fine, I guess." He mumbled and looked up at the gray sky above him. "I can't believe we did it."

"Me neither." Ivan said. He began to brush some of the strands of Gilbert's hair from his face, fully revealing his forehead. "You were amazing, you know. The way you flew up to Neyvar and even after he got your arm."

Gilbert smiled weakly, but then gasped loudly. "My bow! Where's my bow!?"

"Shhh, it's alright. Elizaveta retrieved it; it's wrapped in some cloth attached to one of the bags." Ivan said as he stroked Gilbert's skin.

The albino sighed heavily. "Good..." he breathed out. He closed his eyes and took a breath. "I wasn't scared." He said quietly. Ivan looked at him curiously. "When I was face-to-face with that dragon and looking into his eyes... I didn't feel scared. I felt strangely... at peace."

"You thought you were going to die and you were okay with that fact, weren't you?" Ivan asked, his fingers stopping on pale skin.

Gilbert sighed again, "Yeah, probably, but now I'm glad, _really_ glad, that we're all here. That I'm here."

"I'm glad you're here too." Ivan smiled softly and brought a hand up to his lips, gave two of his fingers a kiss and then pressed his fingers to Gilbert's lips. When Gilbert stared confusedly up at him, he chuckled. "Because I can't kiss you right now." He said quietly.

Gilbert turned his head away, blushing ever-so-slightly. "Don't go getting mushy on me now."

"But you like when I'm mushy." Ivan teased and bopped the albino's nose softly. Gilbert let out a soft laugh and moved his hand to hold onto one of Ivan's. He turned his head back, resting it on the Russian's thighs and tried to rest.

Ivan gave a gentle squeeze to the Elf's hand and smiled. He was so incredibly grateful that he still had this hand to hold.

.

.

Ivan walked through the halls of the College. He was told to stay away from Gilbert until his bloodstream was fully free of the poison and was considered okay by Roderich's standards. It seemed that Gilbert would get too excited when he sees Ivan, so he'd be better off alone for a few hours until his body could recuperate. Roderich also said that he would be able to heal Gilbert's broken arm and that his ribs weren't as serious as he first thought. It will take a few weeks to fully heal up but once it does, he'll be able to use his arm again, though he _strongly_ recommended not fighting or doing any sort of strenuous activity for months even, that way it can heal well.

After a torturous 5 hours, Ivan was allowed in to see Gilbert in the infirmary.

The image looked familiar. A worn out Elf with his arm wrapped in bandages, most of his clothes missing. It reminded him of the first thought he had when he recognized Gilbert in this very room and bed months ago.

_"I know who this is and I don't like him."_ Were his exact words. He huffed a small laugh. _'I didn't know who you were, but I found out and I love you now.'_ He thought to himself.

He walked over to the bed where Gilbert was sleeping peacefully and simply waited for the other to wake up. The Russian spent a long time just watching the other's pale chest rise and fall, his small huffs of breath just barely audible. Ivan couldn't wait to wake up to that beautiful face every morning for as long as his forever would last.

Gilbert groaned and the sound made Ivan tense up and fidget on the edge of his seat. He moved his chair a little closer to the bed.

"Gilbert? Can you hear me?" Ivan asked quietly.

The albino grunted softly and opened his eyes. He aimed those pink orbs right at Ivan and gave a small crooked grin. "Yeah I can hear you." He said.

The simple sentence made Ivan smiled brightly and he leaned forward and gave Gilbert a gentle kiss on the cheek. "I'm so glad you're awake. How do you feel?"

"I'm alright. I feel a bit sluggish but all things considered, I feel good." He said with a smile.

"Good..." Ivan said and looked down, his face dropping with sadness. "I'm sorry, Gilbert."

The Elf tilted his head a little on the pillow. "For what?"

"For not being able to protect you better." Ivan said. He looked so ashamed with himself. Gilbert was certain that the Russian was beating himself up unnecessarily for this.

"Hey don't worry about it." Gilbert's voice was light and carefree. He clearly wanted Ivan to forgive himself. "I knew that the chances of one of us getting hurt was good, I'm just glad we're both alive." He let out a soft chuckle.

Ivan smiled a little again. "Alright, I can accept that." He said.

Gilbert raised an eyebrow for a moment, but then he turned his head. "I'm sorry too, though."

"What for?"

"Well... we won't be able to celebrate tonight like we planned..." he mumbled, blushing softly now.

Ivan's eyes widened and a moment later he grinned slightly. "You just got your arm broken by a dragon that also poisoned you and you're worried that you can't have sex?" He inquired. Gilbert remained silent, his face reddening more because, yes, he _was_ worried about it. "You're incredible, but don't worry, we'll have plenty of time to do it once you feel better; I don't want to hurt you even more when we do after all." he smiled and stroked the skin of Gilbert's cheek.

Gilbert moaned softly in his throat at the touch and he shifted his body a little. "You promise?" he asked.

Ivan nodded. "I promise, and we'll do it as much as you want until you can't even walk." He grinned at how red Gilbert's face turned. He leaned in closer and cupped Gilbert's slightly red face and stared deep into those pink irises that he adored.

"I love you so much, Gilbert, and I always will until the day I die." He said and gave a brief kiss to the albino's lips.

Gilbert pushed his head up a little and weakly returned the kiss. "I love you too, until the day I die." He said.

Ivan pressed his lips a bit more to Gilbert's, taking him into a passionate but tender kiss. He knew the consequence of what Gilbert said. Loving him until he dies meant loving him for hundreds of years even after he's dead. Ivan almost didn't believe that anyone could go so long with only loving one person. Eventually Gilbert would meet another and fall in love with them, right?

Ivan knew it was the right thing to hope for, but he felt very protective and possessive of Gilbert. He didn't even like others complimenting him. Gilbert was his, and as soon as the Elf healed, he would show him just exactly how much he adored every bit of him.

But until that wonderful day comes, he will stay like this: By Gilbert's side to make sure he's okay. After all, it is only fair since Gilbert is not only giving himself to Ivan in heart and body, but he's giving him his life, and that was something that Ivan could never fully repay him for.

* * *

**~Fin~**

* * *

Thank you so much for reading. I appreciate all the comments/reviews, encouragement, love, and support I've received while writing this story. I had a lot of fun writing it, though I did have several cases of writer's block and some chapters weren't my best work, but I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless.

**Author's Notes:**  
-So for anyone who's wondering why I titled this story 'Equilibrium', here's why: The definition of equilibrium is, "a state in which opposing forces or influences are balanced." That should clear things up a lot, but it represents Ivan and Gilbert, fire and ice, coming together and finding peace. Going a bit deeper, it can represent their feelings and their hate for each other that eventually turned to love, and then leaning to balance their fear and want so they can be together, however when I was developing this story I based it on the fire and ice thing.

—

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


	13. Epilogue

**[Originally posted: 11/24/2013]**

A short epilogue of many years later...

.

****Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor am I making any money off of this or any of my other writings.**

****Chapter Warning(s): Angst, heartache, mention of multiple character deaths.**

* * *

It had been a long time, a very long time. Gilbert cursed himself for not doing this sooner but whenever he'd think of doing it, he'd back out.

After all, visiting graves is painful.

He stepped up to the first set. Two nicely carved white marble stones erected from the lush patch of green grass. He knelt down and read the epitaph of one.

'Here lies Roderich Edelstein; alchemist and loving husband.' Gilbert smiled a little at the last two words; he remembered so clearly the day Roderich and Elizaveta got married. It made his eyes fill with tears for more than one reason. He glanced over to the twin grave next to Roderich's; it was Elizaveta's, who just wanted 'Powerful warrior' on her grave. He placed a small bouquet of flowers in front of Elizaveta's and stood up.

"Thanks for taking me in, you guys. I owe you so much more than I let you know." He said quietly. "I'd love to stay and talk but I have one more to visit. I already visited by Arthur, Francis, and Antonio..." he smiled sadly and brought a hand up, readjusting the long white scarf he had wrapped around his neck.

.

This was the hard part. When was the last time he spoke to Ivan? It felt like everyday that he would call out to him with, alas, no answer. It was just him, crying out and breaking down until he was too tired to feel. He knew this as well, and it made it hurt more. 50 years ago the battle at SilverMountain took place, where Ivan and he bravely fought and killed Neyvar. A few weeks after when Gilbert recovered, Ivan and he left the College to be together. Time was ticking, after all. With the help of his sisters, Ivan bought a small house for the two of them to live the rest of their days -or his days- together. They did for a very long time, loving and enjoying each morning they'd wake up together. Though the house was fairly small, it was perfect to them. Once Gilbert's arm finally healed from being broken by Neyvar, he almost instantly pounced on Ivan, wanting to celebrate in the intimate way that they had planned. Ivan didn't deny him and indeed took Gilbert into his arms like he fantasized about and made love to him. It was everything both of them dreamt it would be, and over the last 50 years, Gilbert belonged to Ivan and Ivan only, not just his heart, but his body as well. Still though, age caught up with Ivan and he lost his fire. He ached, hurt, and was oftentimes sick. Gilbert became his caretaker in the final few years. It never bothered either of them, until...

Gilbert reached the grave he was looking for. He read the name of his lost lover and sighed shakily.

"You said we'd be together forever, but forever lasts longer for some people, but you knew that..." he said. He heard his voice crack a little and he knelt down to the gravestone. He noticed dirt covering some words above Ivan's name and he brushed it off. He felt his voice catch in his throat and it made a strangled squeak when he read the words underneath.

_'Never say goodbye'_

He fell, collapsed and began to cry loudly and shamelessly. There was no one around for miles so it didn't matter, not like it would anyway. This was the first time he visited the grave since Ivan's death. He felt ashamed for not going sooner, he hated himself for it, but he would lose his will each time he thought about it. However after 2 months, he finally had enough and went to visit the man he loves.

The words on the grave cut deep into his heart as he remembered the day so long ago that Ivan had said them, it was a few years after the battle at Silver Mountain...

/

_"We need to talk..." the Russian mumbled to the Elven man. His hand was on his shoulder and his look was grim._

_Gilbert glanced up from his book, blinking curiously. "About what?" he asked._

_"About us." Ivan said and knelt down to the Elf's side. "And about what you'll do when I'm gone."_

_Gilbert's face went cold, his body stiffened and his eyes widened a centimeter. "... why do we need to talk about that?"_

_"Because that day is coming, we both know it. I just need to know if you'll be okay when-"_

_"Well I won't be!" Gilbert shouted, throwing his book from his lap. The book hit Ivan in the head and he winced in pain. He wore a look of emotional hurt, and Gilbert was overtaken with guilt and it showed vividly on his face. _

_He was struck with that guilt and silence took them._

_"... I am sorry, Gilbert." Ivan apologized and took a pale hand into his. "What I've done is unforgivable, and I'd feel better if you hated me."_

_At these last words, Gilbert pushed out of his chair and fell into Ivan, nearly knocking him over. He wrapped his arms tightly around the larger male and cried. It hurt. He wanted this warmth forever, the warmth of Ivan's arms around him like this, it was something he'd gotten so used to having in his life, but it hurt because he knew it would soon disappear, and the only reminder of that warmth would be the dreams and thoughts. _

_"I could never... hate you..." Gilbert mumbled through small sobs and wheezes. _

_Ivan smiled sadly and slid a hand to the back of Gilbert's head. He tangled his fingers in the snow-white locks of the other and pulled him so close that he could just barely breathe._

_"I know, Gilbert. I know."_

_"I'm scared. I don't want to be alone..." Gilbert muttered._

_Ivan pulled back after a moment and he slid a finger along the Elf's chin to make him look at him. "I know, but I promise you will be okay. One day I won't be here, we can't change that, but even so, my only wish is that you never say goodbye."_

/

He brought the scarf up to his face and covered his mouth, trying to muffle his painful cries, trying desperately with no avail to calm himself. It only made him sob more; the scarf still carried Ivan's unique scent on it. His tears drenched the white fabric and the old tears didn't have time to dry due to constant new ones rolling down his pale cheeks.

.

After what felt like hours, Gilbert managed to pull himself together. He uncurled himself from the ball that he had become next to Ivan's grave and stood up. He left the graveyard, and walked down the road. Days passed with no food or water. He finally stood outside a heavy wooden door and took in a deep breath, trying to make himself believe this wasn't reality, and then knocked. A voice from inside granted him entrance and he went in. The man in the room was shocked to see him and stood from his chair. Gilbert was covered in dirt and his clothing was ripped in several places; he clearly had been without food and water for days and had traveled far. The man's eyes narrowed in sadness, knowing that Ivan's death is what brought Gilbert here. He went to the albino and carefully took him into a hug.

"Welcome home, brother." The man whispered, tightening his arms around him.

And Gilbert broke. Tears poured from his pink eyes as his body went limp against Ludwig's.

_'No... this isn't my home...'_

* * *

Oops I forgot to be happy.  
Anyway, thanks for reading through 'Equilibrium', I really appreciate it :)

Thanks for reading, friend.  
If you liked this, please leave a favorite and/or a review. Thank you.


End file.
